Metamorphic
by fakeditfromthewordgo
Summary: Friends, music and Converse. All Max needs to be happy. At least, until a certain black-haired boy comes into her life, and starts to turn all her ideas of boys in general upside down... Fax, Eggy/Igkachu: read it, it'll all make sense... *All human*
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: Me no own. Savvy?**

A/N: Hi. (: So I know the band thing's way overdone, but I couldn't resist. Sue me. On second thoughts, please don't. Just wanted to do a human Max fic, to be completely honest. (: I hope you like it.

"One more time, guys," I sighed, running my fingers through my brown-blonde hair. This was the _third _time we'd stopped halfway through a song. We were just out of it, losing the beat or the time as soon as it changed from the opening. We were all hopeless today, no other way to put it.

"Do we _have _to?" James, much better known as Iggy, complained from behind his custom drumset.

"Yeah, Max," Sam seconded, strumming his guitar tunelessly. "We're having a bad day. Let's leave it, hit the skate park or something."

"Agreed," Dylan chimed in, his bass guitar wobbling precariously as he set it down with the neck hanging off the edge of the table.

"Besides, you promised you'd come meet Fang with me," Iggy reminded me. Ugh. We were meant to meet his half-brother Nick at three, the first Ig and him had seen each other in something like five years. How did I get myself roped into that one? I mean, really. I don't even know the guy, and what kind of a name is _Fang?_

"One last time," I said obstinately. Yeah, I don't do so well at giving up; I'm kind of, just a bit, not really, sort of stubborn. The guys sighed heavily, but picked up their various instruments, knowing the consequences if they didn't (I'd hit them. And, you know, not to blow my own trumpet or whatever, but I'm kind of strong).

"You could run the business of misery," Sam joked, hooking his guitar back up to his amp; he'd pulled it out in the hope of giving up.

"Let's take it from the top," I winked, bringing my mic up to my mouth again. "Ready? One two three four!"

Sam's guitar burst into life, his fingers moving like magic up and down the frets, the best he'd played all afternoon without a doubt. Dylan's hands plucked skilfully at his base, his gaze flicking up every few seconds to check Sam's place, or whatever he did. Iggy's head nodded along with every loud smash he made on his drums.

God. They made it look effortless.

I took a breath, praying that I wouldn't wreck it (how ironic would that be?), then I opened my mouth and started to sing.

_I'm in the business of misery,  
Let's take it from the top.  
She's got a body like an hourglass, it's ticking like a clock.  
It's a matter of time before we all run out,  
When I thought he was mine she caught him by the mouth._

I waited eight long months,  
She finally set him free.  
I told him I couldn't lie he was the only one for me.  
Two weeks and we've caught on fire,  
She's got it out for me,  
But I wear the biggest smile.  


I grinned, knowing this was already one of the best renditions of this song we'd _ever _done. As Sam slammed another power-chord, I literally jumped into the chorus, my hair becoming a mad tangle as I slammed my head up and down along to the beat.

_Whoa, I never meant to brag  
But I got him where I want him now.  
Whoa, it was never my intention to brag  
To steal it all away from you now.  
But God does it feel so good,  
Cause I got him where I want him now.  
And if you could then you know you would.  
It's gonna just feel so...  
It just feels so good._

I grinned, winking at Dylan as he caught my eye for a split-second. He knew never to take it seriously; all of the guys do. When I get really into a song, especially a Paramore one, they know I do stupid things in the heat of the moment.__

Second chances they don't ever matter, people never change.  
Once a whore you're nothing more, I'm sorry, that'll never change.  
And about forgiveness, we're both supposed to have exchanged.  
I'm sorry honey, but I passed it up, now look this way.  
Well there's a million other girls who do it just like you.  
Looking as innocent as possible to get to who,  
They want and what they like it's easy if you do it right.  
Well I refuse, I refuse, I refuse!

I almost screamed the last line, belting it out as Iggy pounded on the drums with vigour, grinning widely. __

Whoa, I never meant to brag  
But I got him where I want him now.  
Whoa, it was never my intention to brag  
To steal it all away from you now.  
But God does it feel so good,  
Cause I got him where I want him right now.  
And if you could then you know you would.  
It's gonna just feel so...  
It just feels so good.

I watched his wildest dreams come true  
And not one of them involving you  
Just watch my wildest dreams come true  
Not one of them involving...

"Hey Sam!" I mimicked Hayley Williams's signature cry for the song as Sam started finger-picking an insanely fast solo, his fingers a blur as they formed and re-formed at maximum speed. His face contorted in concentration as I leaned closer to him, jumping up and down, lifted and charged by the electricity of the music.__

Whoa, I never meant to brag  
But I got him where I want him now.

Whoa, I never meant to brag  
But I got him where I want him now.  
Whoa, it was never my intention to brag  
To steal it all away from you now.  
But God does it feel so good,  
Cause I got him where I want him now.  
And if you could then you know you would.  
It's gonna just feel so...  
It just feels so good. 

I finished with a final head-band, Iggy throwing one of his sticks into the air and catching it, Sam doing one last dramatic strum and Dylan raising his hand into the air.

Woah. Well, I don't mean to brag, but that just felt so good. Yeah, it takes me a while to get the song out of my system, if you know what I mean.

"Well," Iggy said, shoving his sticks into his back pocket and coming to join me, Dylan and Sam. "That wasn't _quite _as bad, huh?"

"Not perfect," Dylan winked.

"Definitely could be improved," Sam grinned, slinging a friendly arm round my shoulders . I rolled my eyes at all three of them.

"We're so doing that Friday night," I told them, throwing Sam's arm off my shoulders and moving so I faced all of them.

Friday was the town's local Band Slam; it happened every year and the prize was a recording contract. It was like our version of the X Factor, sort of... okay, not at all, but you know. This was our first time entering, but we'd all been attending them since we were little kids. Our parents were, sadly enough, psyched at the thought of their little darlings performing at the show they'd gone to every year without fail. God help us.

"Iggy? Max?" My little sister, Ella, knocked on the door before barrelling into the room. "Okay, one, that was _insane _awesome! But me and Nudge still think you should totally sing Lady Gaga..." Me and the guys exchanged a over-our-dead-bodies look.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," I dismissed the thought with a wave of my hand, ignoring Ella's pout. "Two?"

"Oh, yeah," she smiled flirtatiously at Iggy, and he blushed. They have this whole flirty thing going on; they have done for years, but they always denied liking each other (they did). "Iggy's mum's here, said something about time to go get Nick?" I turned to Iggy, confused.

"Nick?"

"Fang," he corrected, smiling slightly. "His real name's Nick."

Okay, let me amend my earlier statement. What kind of a _nickname _is Fang?

"You're blowing us out?" Dylan raised his eyebrows.

"I thought we had a date!" Sam pretended to grab my hand over-dramatically. I withdrew it, and smacked him over the head, laughing.

"Get lost," I rolled my eyes. "And you knew we were going to meet Fang."

"Hmph," Dylan huffed, jokily crossing his arms.

"Any chance of us tagging along?" Sam tried, his eyes hopeful.

"Nah," Iggy laughed. "Don't want to scare him _too _much."

"And you're taking Max?" Sam gazed at him incredulously. I gasped, and slapped him again.

"Hey!" I threw his guitar at him lightly, grabbing it from where he'd lain it on the floor. "Common Ig. Get the hell outta my house, you two, by the way." I grabbed Ig's arm and started dragging him towards the door.

"No way," Sam teased. "We're going _straight _to your room..." He chucked evilly.

"You _dare..._" I warned him. Ella giggled as he stuck his tongue out. "Keep him out, wouldja El?" She grinned and nodded.

For a little sister, I had to give it to her, she was pretty damn awesome. She was popular, and all make-up orientated, but still... she was cool. She wasn't one of the band, but she was always joking around with us, hanging with us at school with her best friend Monique, otherwise known as Nudge.

"See you later, guys," Dylan finally smiled, showing that underneath all the teasing and messing about, we were all really close. How could we not be? I'd grown up with all of them by my side. Literally, in Iggy's case: he and his little brother and sister lived right next to us. Which could be a good thing (in that he could come over whenever) and a bad thing (in that he liked waking me up ridiculously early on Sunday mornings. Who the hell gets up at eight am on a Sunday? Seriously. Thanks to Iggy, me).

Still. I don't know what I'd do without them, to be honest, seeing as all the girls in our year were either sluts and chavs (or a mixture of both. We like to call those rather common creatures slavs), of which, no matter what Iggy says, I am neither. Thank God.

So yeah. I prefer to stick to my guys and my little sister. Me, Ig, Dyl and Sam were all fifteen, and Ella and Nudge were both fourteen, a grade below us. We'd only formed the band when Dyl _finally _turned fifteen (heheh. We never quit teasing little Babycakes about being the youngest of us all), which was only a few months ago.

We were good, though, already playing gigs most Friday nights (and you thought we had no life. Don't deny it, I can tell). It'd taken hours of endless rehearsal, but we could finally call ourselves a band (Golden Silence, to be exact) without anyone snickering at us (and subsequently receiving a knuckle sandwich from me).

"Later," Sam echoed with a small smile. As we walked out of the door at last, Iggy waved and I did a grand, sweeping bow, before Ig proceeded in tripping me over the threshold. Naturally, he then ran for his life as I raised my hand, cackling manically. The guys clapped Iggy as if he was some hero, and guffawed at me as I turned round and made a knuckle-cracking motion. Remind me to murder them when I get back, would you?

**X X X**

The ride to the airport was long and tense. See, Iggy's mum, Jane, _hates _me. Seriously. She refuses to speak to me, and likes to pretend I don't even exist. No, I don't even know why. Iggy says it's something about me being too rough for her lovely little sweetheart James (*snicker*. As if) and her wanting him to hang around with 'those charming, pretty little girls' (read as: the slavs).

And you know what I said back to him? 'Her lo- Wait. I am _not _rough!'

...How they laughed. They groaned in pain afterwards and sent me their deepest regrets.

This time, though, we didn't even have Angel or Gazzy (his full name unofficially being the Gasman, due to his... uh... let's say _interesting _(read as: disgusting) digestive system... the kid can clear a room in an instant), Ig's little brother and sister, with typical little kid statements, the highlights of which would be:

_'Mum! Look! That bee's attacking that pretty flower!' _(Jane's explanation for that one was... interesting).

Or, the one that had Iggy laughing for weeks:

_Jane: What lovely weather! Winter's coming, and you know what that means..._

_Angel and Gazzy: Halloween!_

_Jane: Yes, and Grandma, Thanksgiving and Christmas!_

_Gazzy: ...Grandma's a holiday? _

My personal favourite would have to be the timeless classic 'Are we there yet?'. Those kids sure know how to tie their stepmother in knots, which is one of the reasons I love them so much. That, and they always stash their money together for my birthday, or Christmas, to buy me a new pair of Converse (they know my weaknesses far too well for an eight year-old boy and a six year-old girl).

When we finally arrived, Jane strode off briskly towards a bench outside; Ig'd already arranged for her to wait outside while we went to go meet Fang, Angel and Gazzy. Okay, family tree time: Jane's husband was Iggy's stepdad, and Fang, Angel and Gazzy's real dad. Fang lived with his mum, but he used to come over every Summer (back when I was too young to remember), until he just suddenly stopped. None of us knew why. Iggy only knew him through Facebook, and apparently from their many conversations, Fang was awesome. Angel and Gazzy flew over to London every so often to see him, since they were too young to know or want otherwise. Fang'd decided that it was time he came and gave his dad another try... so here we were, coming to collect him.

"Where d'you reckon he'll be?" Iggy asked, his eyes scanning the room restlessly. He was hyped to see Fang, especially after our high with the band half an hour ago. Hey, I guess I would be too. I mean, the first time seeing his step-brother after all these years? Gotta feel good.

"Uh, the arrivals department?" I replied, deliberately acting the smart-arse.

"Oh. Yeah." Ig shook his head like he was trying to rid himself of his idiocy (impossible. Believe me, we've tried). "That makes sense."

"No shit Sherlock," I rolled my eyes, then turned around when I realised Ig was leading us to the departing area. Idiot.

"Shut up," he grinned, nearly walking into a woman who was juggling two toddlers and several suitcases, a bored-looking teenage sauntering behind, nodding her head to the music we could hear even through her iPod headphones. "Smart-arse."

I stuck my tongue out and started to walk ever-faster, weaving my way through the crowd away from Iggy. I heard him shout after me, but I was too far away already to hear. Craning my head around to find him, I walked straight into some boy's chest. Ow. What was he made of? Freaking steel?

"Okay?" I looked up from my aching side and found myself looking into milk-chocolate eyes. It was a boy, with over-long brown hair and olive skin. Woah.

"Uh, yeah, fine," I tried for a smile. "Wasn't looking where I was going. Sorry." See! I can apologise (to total strangers)! And you thought I was above that.

"Don't sweat it." This is where I walk past him, right? My brain's just gone on a vacation. Possibly to Hawaii. Nice to know it's always here when I need it.

"Hey! Fang!" Iggy's voice came from behind me. Huh? He came to a stop beside me. "Oh, Max, you found him. Idiot." He shoved my head a little (curse his tall-ness. I'm not short, I'm fun-sized) and I smacked his stomach.

"Shut it." He rolled his eyes at me, then turned to Fang, grinning.

"This is Max," he explained, since I'm so clearly incapable of doing anything for myself. Did I mention I hate people doing things for me? "She's my best friend, for some unknown reason. She's loud, annoying, overly violent, more than slightly psychopathic, and believes she's going to rule the world one day."

Charming. Nice to know I'm loved.

"Don't deny it, you know it's going to happen," I told him before turning to Fang, grinning. "Hi. I'm Max. Ignore anything that ever comes out of Iggy's mouth, he's an annoying idiot." He almost smiled, but not quite. Okay, strong kid that never smiles. I can deal.

"Yo." Okay. Strong, silent kid that never smiles. And possibly one of the only people in the world that can pull off saying yo and not sounding like he's trying to be cool.

"Actually," Iggy said, "ignore anything either of us ever says about the other."

"Yeah, that works," I agreed.

With that, we each grabbed one of Fang's bags (after he'd told us that Angel and Gazzy had already gone outside to find Jane) and started moving slowly through the crowd. Iggy immediately broke away from us, pretty much running out of there to find Jane and the kids. Me and Fang moved at a more... civilised pace, rolling our eyes at him.

"Who said you were going to rule the world?" he asked me to my surprise, seeing as it was the first real sentence we'd gotten out of him since we'd discovered him.

"It's just the obvious job for someone of my awesomeness," I winked to show I was joking.

"And if there's someone just as awesome?"

"They die."

"What if they have an army?"

"My army obliterates them." WTH was this about? Kind of fun, though.

"Their army's as strong as yours."

"Impossible."

"What if our army has J. K. Rowling?"

"Well, I have James Patterson... Hold up," I realised what he'd said. "You're trying to take my crown from me!" How dare he? He looked at me out of the corner of his eyes, another almost-smile on his lips.

"Just checking out the competiton." he winked as we emerged out into the bright Californian sunshine. We both blinked as our eyes adjusted; the others hadn't noticed us yet.

I looked him up and down as he did the same, free of others obscuring our vision as they pushed past us. He was a pretty nice male specimen, you know, if I thought like that. Which I don't, because I'm known for not dating. He also seemed okay. Kind of like the guys. Funny, interesting. Someone I wanted to get to know better? Possibly. But I liked him already, even if he was trying to cheat me out of world leadership.

"Hm," we both said at the same time as I launched into my catchphrase. "I like you. When I rule the world, your death shall be quick and painless." How did he know that? I said it daily, if not hourly, to all the guys.

Just before Angel came running up for a hug, our eyes met again, and I experienced the awesomeness of a real Fang smile.

Well. Looks like we might have a new addition to our little group.

**A/N: So, let me know what you think? (: Not sure what I think of this, but I've been reading so many human Max fics that I couldn't get this out of my head. (: **

**Review?**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: No own. That honour goes to JP (: **

**A/N: (: You guys went above and beyond with the level of response for the first chapter, it was miles above anything I expected. Thank you so much (: If you reviewed anonymously, then I apologise for not being able to reply to your review ):**

**Oh, and by the way, the song from the first chapter [as if you don't know it] is Misery Business by Paramore, the most amazing band ever. Heheh. Oh, and I'm English, so bear with me with the American stuff, if you will. Enjoy (: **

"What's he like then?" Ella asked, perched on the edge of my bed. I rolled my eyes, strumming another note on my guitar (named Amy, after Amy Lee from Evanescence. I know, I amuse myself sometimes, I really do) and wishing she'd just go away so I could hurry up and learn the opening riff to American Idiot by Green Day.

I love my sister. I really do. Honest. But sometimes, she really does get on my nerves. Like when she tells me I should stop stuffing my feet in my ratty Converse and buy some high heels (she can just keep on dreaming with that one). Or when she tries to set me up with some guy I hardly know (how I laugh at her futile attempts). Or, like now, when she wouldn't shut up about about boys: did I like him? Wasn't he gorgeous? Did she think he liked her? And so on.

"Ma-_ax_," she whined, bouncing up and down on my music-note patterned bedspread, knocking my fingers off Amy.

"El. I'm trying to play here," I motioned towards Amy with a flick of my fingers.

"Well tell me and I'll go away!" Oh for crying out loud. There really was no hope, was there?

"Fine," I pushed Amy onto my bed, and leaned towards her conspiratorially on my elbows. "He's a boy." I leaned away and rolled my eyes at her exasperated expression. Couldn't she tell I had better things to do than gossip about Fang?

"What colour hair's he got?" she tried.

"Red with blue and green streaks." The sad thing was, for a moment, she actually believed me.

"Max."

"Ella."

"_Please_ tell me?" Ugh. The Bambi eyes.

"Promise to go away?"

"Swear!" I sighed.

"He's got black hair that's way too long for his face, brown eyes, and dark skin. He never smiles." At anyone except me, at least. Then again, Iggy'd managed to get a twitch of his lips out of him, which I'd realised was almost as rare as a full smile.

"So..." WTH did she want? A freaking FBI report? Actually, I wouldn't be surprised.

"He's really quiet, and doesn't really talk much." The conversation we'd had about ruling the world had been the most I'd heard him talk all day, including the time me and Iggy hung with him while he put away all his clothes and stuff. Jane had taken Angel and Gazzy out, so we had the house to ourselves, too. It was a good afternoon, but then how could it not be with those two?

"So he's good-looking?" Oh. _That's _what she wanted. Why wasn't I surprised?

"Didn't really notice," I lied. Hey, what do you think the consequences would be if she knew I _had _noticed? She'd think I _liked _him, and I so didn't. He was just a friend, if that, to be honest. I definitely did _not _like him.

"Ugh," she huffed. "Max, you are _useless _sometimes."

"Hey! Offended much?"

"You'll get over it," she winked as she closed the door behind her, finally leaving me and Amy in peace at last.

The guys didn't know I played guitar, yet. I wasn't anywhere near as good as Sam (not that I'd ever admit that... ever), and I could only imagine the teasing I'd get if I messed up even one note. Still. It was kind of fun, playing. And I'd even managed to incorporate it into a couple of songs I'd written. Did I just say songs I'd written? Yeah, forget that. Max Ride doesn't write songs. Unless, you know, they're all electric guitar and ass-kicking lyrics, not sad and acoustic guitar chord-filled. Which mine totally aren't.

Oh, thank God my phone just started letting rip about The Black Parade, saving me from my strangely retarded thoughts.

"Max here, 'sup?"

"'_Sup_? Really, Max?" It had to be Iggy, didn't it?

"Shut up, just because I'm cool enough to say it and not sound like a retard."

"I beg to differ." Oh. And Fang as well. This just got better and better. Iggy started laughing in the background, and I rolled my eyes. And yes, I do know they can't see me, it's for effect, okay?

"What do you want? I have a life, you know."

"Really? Fang, did you know Max has a life?" Oh for crying out loud. Seriously?

"Unfortunately." I bet his lips are twitching. In fact, I'm pretty damn sure they are.

"Whatever, both of you. You trying to make me hang up?"

"No," Iggy sobered up immediately. "Just wondering who you have for homeroom?"

"Uh..." I mentally went through the list of teachers I had. "Oh, Mrs Davies."

"Thought so. Fang has the same, meet us at the gates tomorrow?"

"Sure. Might be kinda late, though."

"Why?" Fang asked.

"My little sister Ella has to do her make-up." Iggy laughed, and I could imagine Fang's lips moving again, just a little.

"Hey, we still on for tomorrow night?"

"Oh yeah," I remembered. "Sure. My place after school, wasn't it?"

"I thought it was at Dylan's?"

"You sure it wasn't at Sam's?"

"Mum says I asked if it was okay to have it here..."

We burst out laughing as we realised neither of us had a clue where we'd be rehearsing tomorrow night.

"I'll text Sam," I promised. "He always knows."

"'Kay," Iggy agreed. "Well, we're off. Want our company for a couple of hours?"

"Nah, I'm sick of you," I laughed. "Not really, just got Mount Homework to climb, if you know what I mean." So I lied. To my best friend. Sue me.

"Not really," Fang replied.

"But when do we ever? Anyway. See you tomorrow!"

"Yeah, yeah. See you."

"Love you to death!" I rolled my eyes at his high-pitched voice that was so obviously an imitation of Ella I wanted to punch him.

"Piss off."

"She has a problem with commitment," I heard him telling Fang before I hung up, rolling my eyes at him.

So they were close. Already. Hey, it's cool. At least Iggy wouldn't be instant-messaging me every five minutes to try to copy my maths homework. He never got away with it. Mainly because we were in different classes, but you know, never underestimate Ig's stupidity.

I drew Amy back into my arms (that sounds slightly wrong, but you know what I mean. Stop thinking like that) and strummed a few more chords, looking at the tabbed sheet in front of me where I'd scribbled a few chord patterns.

When I'd gotten the hang of it, I started humming along.

_Do you know the enemy?_

_Do you know your enemy? _

_Well, gotta know the enemy _

_Do you know the enemy? _

_Do you know your enemy?_

_Well, gotta know the enemy_

_Do you know the enemy?_

_Do you know your enemy?_

_Well, gotta know the enemy_

_Violence is an energy_

_Against the enemy_

_Violence is an enemy_

_Bringing on the fury_

_The choir infantry _

_Revolt against the honour to obey_

I was just really getting into it, slamming the chords out on Amy (hey, even though she's acoustic, she packs a punch. Say different and I'll hit you) when someone knocked on my door.

"Max?" It was mum.

"Yeah?"

"Don't you think it's time to go to sleep?" Confused, I checked the time. Holy cow (don't laugh). Since when did it get to eleven pm?

"Oh. Uh, yeah, I guess," I shrugged as she opened the door and leant against the wall.

"Good day?" she asked, smiling as only my mum can. Thank God both me and Ella got her genes, and not dad's. I mean, no offence to him or whatever, but... well... yeah.

"Yeah," I smiled involuntarily at the memory. "It was fun, and Fang's alright." Mum raised an eyebrow. What? I'm not allowed to like someone quickly? Okay, I might have some slight trust issues, but still!

"Really," she deadpanned.

"Yeah!"

"You told Ella you didn't like him."

"Yeah well, that's Ella!"

"Still," mum laughed, moving towards me to wrap an arm around me and draw me into a hug. I rolled my eyes, but I couldn't help hugging her back. She has some mystic power, I swear, because if anyone else hugged me _that _hard? Well, they wouldn't enjoy it, let's say that.

"Don't tell Ella," I warned, though I didn't even know why I was saying that because it wasn't like there was anything to hide.

"I won't," she winked at me.

"Oh, yeah. Can the band practice here tomorrow?" Hey, if it was here I better check it's okay.

"Oh, Max..." Mum's eyebrows furrowed, and she ran a hand through her long, blonde curls. "I have a work friend coming over... I thought you said you were all at Iggy's tomorrow?" Oh. So _that's _where we were practising. Iggy's idiocy knows no boundary. See why I'm going to be the one ruling the world? You know, after my army crushes Fang's into oblivion? Because everyone else is just too stupid. :)

"No sweat," I shoved Amy into her classy black case, fastening it quickly and placing it beside my keyboard (also a secret from the band). "Well, night, mum."

"Night, Max," she left, shutting the door behind her. My mum, folks. Round of applause? Yeah. She's cool, huh? We don't really have any secrets, any of us. Even if I lie, Ella normally gets it out of me in the end. Like the guitar thing, etc. We're closer than most families. I guess it's because dad left when me and Ella were still little kids, so mum was all we had... she knows me better than myself, sometimes. Scary.

Still. I love them both, and if anyone messes with my family, you mess with me too. And trust me, you don't want that with a future world leader. Me, not Fang, before you start.

**X X X**

"Hey, Max!"

"Hey." I wasn't in the mood for Iggy. Actually, I wasn't in the mood for any company, at all. It was Monday morning, and, as always, I had a crappy case of Monday-itis. Yeah, it exists.

"Yo," Fang nodded in acknowledgement. How does he _do _that? I mean, seriously. If I went around saying yo to everyone and doing that weird nod thing, they'd all burst out laughing at me trying to be badass. Which would be a major mistake on their part, seeing as when I rule the world I can just dump them in a pot of lava or something.

We started walking through the normal crowds gathered round various lockers. I didn't miss the number of slav's nudging one another and pointing at Fang, then giggling loudly. Looks like Fang's quite the ladies' man, eh? Actually, that's not strictly true; he was walking with his head down, as if he was embarrassed. Hahaha. Fang's embarrassed.

"I'm heading this way," Ig pointed to the opposite corridor to the one me and Fang were about to go down.

"'Kay. See you... at break," he wasn't in either of my first two lessons. Art, then Drama. Fun lessons, as some people would put them.

"Yeah," he grinned, already walking away. "We have math last!"

"You're not in my math class!" I yelled after him, rolling my eyes, but he just shook his head. I could imagine the smile on his face.

"Guess what?" Fang asked me, once we were walking again. Hey, it talks! He hadn't spoken a word, besides yo, which doesn't even qualify as a word (and not because I can't use it), all morning. Then again, me and Iggy do sort of talk a lot. Hey, it's just the way we roll.

"What?" I asked as someone almost slammed me into the wall. I cursed, but didn't retaliate. See? I learned years ago not to hit anyone bigger and possibly stronger than you. So now, when I do, it's because I over-estimate my own strength, which, as my mum says, is fair enough, and just another sign of my big head. Just for the record, I have a completely normal-sized head. Seriously. Stop looking like that.

"I've recruited Dumbledore," he almost smiled again. It took me a moment to figure out what he meant... oh, of course. Hang on. He should've given up by _now! _Silly, silly boy. Didn't he know better? Oh. Right. We've only known each other for a day. If that.

"Nu-uh," I contradicted. "I have Gandalf, and they switch beard-trimming tips every other month, so Dumbledore's supporting me."

Another almost smile.

"No fair."

"Never said it was," I grinned as I pushed the door open for him. See, I can be polite, too. Sometimes. When I feel like it. Which, you know, is practically never, but that's an unneeded detail.

"And what would you say if I had Edward Cullen?" I almost burst out laughing.

"That wimp? _Anyone _can kick his ass. Specifically Dracula."

"Who's dead," he felt obliged to point out.

"Maybe I can raise the dead then." Nope, I'm not quite sure where that come from, either.

"Right."

"I can!"

"I never said you couldn't." I glared at him, and decided that was the end of _that _ conversation. And just because I ended it doesn't mean I lost.

"Miss, this is F—Nick." I introduced him shortly to Mrs Davies, a stocky woman with grey hair. She liked me (don't act surprised), mainly because she ran the hockey team, and I liked hockey. Look, it's running around with a big wooden stick and ruining people's shins' with it. What's not to like?

"Fnick?" she raised an eyebrow.

"Nick," Fang corrected quietly. "But my friends call me Fang."

"Ah. Right." Because that's completely normal, isn't it Mrs Davies? "Well, just take a seat next to Max, for now, and we'll sort out places some other time. Got a timetable?" Fang nodded mutely.

"Right. Well, Max, look after him, alright?" Me? Why me? He had his own army to look after him... made up of fictional characters. Right. Okay.

"Sure." I threw my bag, wanting it to land on my seat, but I'm not exactly the best shot. It arched up, and landed straight in the queen slav's lap. And also my worst enemy. Well, she would be, but I don't like to use those childish terms – I prefer arch nemesis. Just because she stole the oompa-loompa's make-up didn't automatically make her cool, like she obviously thought.

"Chuck it, Lissa," I called as she held up my black 'A Rocket to The Moon' emblazoned rucksack.

"Of course it was _you_," she sneered, trying to glare; I couldn't really tell, I was too busy being blinded by her neon-orange skin. She chucked it feebly, much worse than mine, and it ended up at her feet. Fang's lips twitched, and I stifled a giggle.

"For crying out loud," I rolled my eyes, and plucked the bag from under her feet. By now, though, she'd clocked Fang, and was just staring at him like the idiot she clearly was. Fang, obviously embarrassed, studied the floor. I raised an eyebrow at Lissa, then grabbed Fang's elbow and led him to the seat next to mine. Lissa tossed her auburn hair over one shoulder snottily, then started talking to her right-hand slav, Brigid.

"What've you got first?" Fang asked me quietly, laying his non-crumpled timetable on the table in front of us.

"Uh..." I grabbed mine from my bag. By now, it was a crumpled ball and completely unrecognisable as a piece of paper, let alone something with writing on it. Fang's lips twitched again, and he helped me smooth it out. We managed to work out that we had most lessons together, except for Spanish (I was taking German) and History (he had Geography. Hahaha).

"I can get to know the features of the land I'm going to be ruling," he shrugged, but he was almost smiling again.

"Right. Of course." He glanced at me again, his dark eyes twinkling.

"Of course." I rolled my eyes, smiling.

"Whatever you say," I stood as the bell rang out loud and clear (adding to the headache I'd already got from general Monday-ness). "Come on. Art first. Nice and easy."

He rolled his eyes at me, then gave me a half-smile. You know what? They're even better than his full smiles. Killer half-smiles.

**A/N: Okay, totally clichéd ending, but hey. (: **

**Review?**


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I wish I was cool enough to be JP. **

**A/N: You guys are awesome, the number of reviews I receive is insane (: xXalltimeloveXx, are you reading my mind? (; Anyhow, your wish has been granted, even though I wrote this before I got your review. (: Oh, and the song Max was playing/singing last chapter was Know The Enemy by Green Day (: Enjoy!**

"Hey, guys!" Iggy hailed us from where he was stood with Dylan, Sam, Ella and Nudge. Me and Fang had managed to survive both Art and Drama without arguing (too loudly) about who was going to rule the world (me), or any more encounters with Lissa.

"Yo," Fang did the nodding thing, and I came very close to slapping him, because it should be impossible for someone to do that without _trying._

"Hey!" I grinned and slapped them all a high-five as Fang gave Iggy a lip twitch.

"Fang, Ella. Ella, Fang. Nudge, Fang. Fang, Nudge." Iggy went round the group, introducing everyone in the same strangely confusing and typically stupid way. Anyone else notice he introduced Ella first?

"Fang thinks he's gonna rule the world," I rolled my eyes, especially as Ella snickered.

"Have you seen her bedroom? She's already bombed it! It's just a matter of time before she starts everywhere else..." So much for sisterly support. The guys snickered and Fang gave me one of those half-smiles while Ella slapped Nudge's palm in a high-five.

"I'll make you go cry in the emo corner," I warned as I raised my hand threateningly. Ella immediately shied away, giggling.

"Leave me alone!"

"Never!" I vowed as I grabbed her and started tickling her around her neck; she's especially ticklish round there, as me and Mum had found out. Excellent threat.

"Max... please... stop!" she managed to gasp out between giggles. Everyone was watching on amusedly as I expertly twisted her round and caught her in a headlock.

"You sorry?"

"Maybe..." I tightened my lock, just enough so it'd hurt a little, but not enough to really choke her or anything. I'd never hurt one of us. Actually, that said, I wouldn't really hurt anyone, unless they were really threatening me. I'm not like that. I'm tough, but I'm not cruel.

"What about now?"

"Okay, okay! I'm sorry!" I released her, laughing. She glared at me and rubbed her neck. "You'll pay for that," she said darkly.

"Right," I raised my eyebrows cockily.

"You will!"

"Of course I will." I rolled my eyes again, then turned to Fang. "Coming to get a drink with me? I'll show you the caf."

He nodded silently, then stood. How can you be _that _quiet? I mean, seriously? Nudge would explode if she even tried.

"Bye, you two..." Ella said suggestively, winking at me. Oh God. I can only imagine the conversations we'll be having later, though I can assure you they'll be made up mainly of threats. None serious, but still.

"See you in math, Max!" Iggy grinned. I was physically restrained by Sam from going over there and slapping the smirk straight off of his face.

"My army will destroy you, Ig!" was my parting shot as Fang and I walked into the huge crowd of people gathered around the door. Crap. Did I mention I'm kind of claustrophobic? People started pressing into me, shoving me this way, and that, and in the end I just gave up trying to make my way in any particular direction, just letting the crowd move me and trying not to hyperventilate. I just don't like small, enclosed spaces, okay? Mum said it was something to do with being locked into a dog kennel by someone when I was really little.

It seemed like forever, but I finally emerged from the crowd into the cafeteria, which was, ironically enough, almost free of people. I say that because I don't include slavs as people; they're like mindless clones whose minds have a one-track mind: boys. Actually, I take that back. They have a _two_-track mind: boys, and which oompa-looma was easiest to blackmail make-up out of. I swear they wear stage make-up. No joke.

Once I'd gotten over my claustrophobic moment, I started looking for Mr Tall, Dark and Silent. He wasn't too hard to spot: he was easily one of the tallest guys around, and he didn't have a crewcut. That immediately ruled out half of the males in our school, seeing as they're all brawn and no brain. Idiots. See, Iggy, Sam and Dylan are idiots too, but they're _my _idiots.

"Hey. Fang!" I called over to him where he stood, watching his feet intently. What's gotten into—oh. "Oh, Lissa, babes! I didn't see you there!" I mocked her and Brigid, speaking in a falsetto voice, all dramatic hand-gestures, as I came to stand beside Fang. She narrowed her heavily made-up eyes at me, but this time, the bright pink powder on her eyelids was slightly too powerful for my eyes. I keep my distance from their neon-colours when I can.

"Max." she said my name like I was vermin, which, last time I checked, I'm pretty I'm not. But then, I didn't look in a mirror every five seconds like some people I could mention, so it could've all changed since this morning when I cleaned my teeth.

"What's up, babe?" I gave her my biggest, fakest smile. Fang wasn't fooled, though, I could see his lips twitching.

"Oh piss off, _Maximum_," she said my full name like an expletive. And you know what? I think it'd be pretty damn cool if it was. An expletive, I mean. Hahahah. Imagine that. "Whenever you feel like dumping the losers, and hanging around with a real girl... call me." she flicked a piece of paper at him, not watching as he let it fall, fluttering, to the floor. Then she stalked off, shooting me the bird, back to her own little army of clones.

"Lucky you," I said sarcastically to Fang as I leant down to retrieve the paper Lissa'd thrown. As I'd suspected, her phone number was scrawled across it in pink glittery gel pen, a small lip-stick mark in the shape of her lips underneath it. Lissa's logo. "Ew."

"Tell me about it," Fang groaned. I glanced up at him.

"You're used to this?"

"Sort of," he shrugged. Well, I wouldn't be surprised. The boy wasn't bad-looking, as far as boys went. "What do _you _want her number for, anyway?"

"Oh, she's my best friend! I lost it the other day." He rolled his eyes.

"Max."

"What?"

"What evil plan are you concocting?" Damn, this guy'd known me for a day, and he could already see right through me.

"Prank calls," I winked, then grabbed a drink from one of the coolers, throwing a couple of coins at one of the lunch ladies. She caught them with a smile. Hey, everyone loves me. Deal with it.

"Max, you're not seriously-"

"Yes, yes I am."

"...You're evil, you know."

"Thank you. I thought you'd have learnt that by now." I rolled my eyes, and he glanced at me again with one of those killer half-smiles.

"Yup," he said, just as the bell went.

"Math," I pushed a door open, and he surprisingly caught it, holding it open for me courteously. Gentleman Fang. Hahaha.

"I thought Iggy said we had it last." I gritted my teeth audibly.

"Iggy. Is. Not. In. My. Math."

He chuckled, and- wait. He chuckled? Well, shiver me timbers (I had a pirate moment. Leave me alone), isn't that the first time I've heard him laugh? I probably shouldn't make a point of it, because that would just be awkard and embara-

"Did you just laugh?"

Smooth Max, real smooth. He looked at me like I was insane (it's not my fault).

"Yeah," he said like I was mentally retarded (okay, first insane, now mentally retarded. What is this, imply insult Max day?). "It's a natural expression, usually used when someone finds something mildly amusing."

And people call me a smart-arse.

"Mildly?" I stared him down. "You sayin' I'm not funny?"

"No... but Michael McIntryre is, and he just joined my army."

How the hell does he manage to turn something like that into a recruitment? Seriously? This guy has issues.

"Yeah well, I have..." I'm not struggling. I'm just simply gathering my thoughts to give a completely relevant and intellectual answer. "Scooby Doo." He just looked at me. "What? He's a talking dog! What's not funny about that?" He raised his eyebrows.

"Everything?" I smacked him feebly as we came to halt outside the door, lining up with the other poor victims about to have math information going in one ear and out the other. "That reminds me of the time Angel wanted a talking dog."

I smiled at the memory; I'd bought Angel a little black Scottie dog for her fifth birthday, a couple of years ago, and she'd completely fallen in love with it, carting it about everywhere. Constantly. She'd even named it Total and clipped little felt wings onto it. Thank God he wasn't real, poor thing.

"I gave her that doll, you know," I watched him as he leaned against the wall opposite me. Again, effortlessly cool. Idiot. I hate him when he does that.

"Seriously?"

"Yup. She's in my army, you know."

His eyes widened.

"No fair."

"You can have Gazzy. Happy?"

"Very. I won't need gas bombs."

"That's barbaric!"

"Never said it wasn't," he winked as we followed the train of the students into the classroom, glowering at him.

I'm so going to kick his non-world-leader-worthy butt.

**X X X**

"WHERE WERE YOU IN MATH?" Iggy pretty much burst my eardrums as Jane pulled up the car next to me and Fang where we were waiting for her at the end of school. Dylan and Sam were getting lifts, but seeing as I lived next door, much to Jane's annoyance, it was kind of pointless walking all the way back.

"James," Jane chided. She was the only one that ever called him by his real name, and another reason I couldn't stick her (not literally, for you less intelligent people out there).

"For the last time, Ig," I said, clambering in beside him. "I am _not _in your math class."

"Skiver," Iggy muttered under his breath, not taking any notice. Fang slid (who _slides _into a car? It's impossible! You climb in and look clumsy as hell, everyone knows that) in beside, shutting the door behind him.

"As if," I rolled my eyes at Ig.

"Mr James wasn't pleased..." he rolled his eyes to the heavens. "Says you'll need to copy up the work missed. Shocking, Maximum, just shocking."

Okay, that was so it. I elbowed him, hard, in the stomach.

"Mum! Max's bullying me!" WTH? Wimp. Jane heaved an all-suffering sigh, probably at the thought of putting up with us both for another ten minutes. Me and Iggy are bad enough in a room with metres between us, but put us in an enclosed space where we're practically touching. World War Three (WW4 will be mine and Fang's battle, in which I, of course, will emerge victorious).

"You bully each other," she said as she took a sharp turn, throwing me into Fang, and Iggy into me. Ow. Talk about uncomfortable, Iggy was pretty much right on top of me. Can't. Breathe. Poor. Fang.

"Well, hello there," he said in a deep voice. I shoved against him, throwing him against the car door.

"Piss off," I glared as I pulled myself off of Fang, who was looking slightly breathless.

"Language, Maximum," Jane gave me a look through the rear-view mirror, using my full name because _she knows _it annoys the hell outta me.

"Yeah, Max," Fang whispered in my ear, one of those half-smiles visible. I rolled my eyes, and dug my shoulder into his side. Crap. Ow. I forgot he was metal. I settled for glowering at him (I'm pretty good at that) and he winked at me.

When we finally piled out of the car, Dylan and Sam were both sat on the front porch, waiting for us.

"Hey!" Sam grinned, jumping up to meet us.

"We come in peace," Dylan added, hauling himself up and rubbing his eyes a little.

"Well, I sure as hell don't," Iggy said, making no sense as usual, and earning himself a glare off Jane for language.

"Idiot," Fang rolled his eyes, stealing my line. Jane let us in, stepping in first and quickly moving to the side to avoid being trampled by the annoying ball of hypernesss that is Iggy.

"We're going to practise!" Iggy yelled as he started running up the stairs, taking them two at a time.

"No shit Sherlock," I muttered under my breath so only Fang could hear. He shot me a half-smile.

"Get a move on, Max," Sam rolled his eyes, shoving me forward a little. I kicked back with my heel, hitting him where it hurts with the back of my Converse. "_Ow! _Really, Max?"

"Yup," I grinned.

"I hate you, you know."

"You love me really," I winked as he raised his eyebrows in disbelief, then ran after Iggy before he could retaliate. Sam took off behind me, and I heard Dylan saying something to Fang that sounded like 'Immaturity at it's purest..." He can hardly talk, though, seeing as he's the one that got dared to wear one of Nudge's dresses and walk up and down the street in her high-heels as well. In broad daylight. See, most _intelligent _people would just leave it right there. Sigh. Of course, Dylan didn't. We're scarred for life.

"What song we doing?" Ig asked once we were all up in the attic (don't laugh. It's huge), sitting down behind the drumset me and Fang had helped him haul back to his house last night.

"Not bothered," Sam and Dylan replied at the same time, both of them tuning their guitars, perched on their amps.

"Max?"

"Uh..." I plugged my microphone in (I need it, considering how loud the lunatics play), considering. Not Paramore, we'd rehearsed our covers of them last night to death (I could never be sick of them, but the guys are). You Me At Six? Nah, not in the mood. Fall Out Boy? Meh. Hey, I know.

"Sam, you got Break Your Little Heart down yet?"

He grinned and nodded.

"Hellova riff, that," he winked. "But I got it covered."

The other guys gave me thumbs up, so I ran over the lyrics in my head mentally. Then I glanced at Fang, who was sat in the window. He was watching me.

"All Time Low?" he asked when he noticed me looking at him. I nodded.

"Awesome band," I said with a smile. He nodded.

"Seen them live a couple of times."

"We're better than them."

"Really?"

"Just wait and see."

With that, I nodded to Iggy, who set the beat easily. Sam came in right on time with the riff, grinning as he played. Dylan started plucking away at his base as always, keeping the other guys in line.

I took a deep breath, winked at Fang, who, if I wasn't mistaken, looked a little impressed, especially at Sam's insanely swift guitar playing, then burst into the song.

_Wide awake, my mistake  
So predictable  
You were fake, I was great  
Nothing personal_

The last two lines were my favourite lyrics to sing. Ever. __

I'm walking  
Who's laughing now?  
(Who's laughing, who's laughing now?)  
I'm wasted, wasting time  
You talk for hours  
But you're wasting lines  
A pretty face but the chase  
Ain't worth the prize

I built it up, then jumped into the chorus, singing it out loud and grinning at Fang as I bounced around, drawing closer, then further away from the guys. __

I'm gonna break your little heart  
Watch you take the fall  
Laughing all the way to the hospital  
'Cause there's nothing surgery can do  
When I break your little heart in two  
I'm gonna break your little heart in two

Party queen, cause a scene  
So ridiculous  
Little dress, maybe less  
So conspicuous

The music was charging me, lifting me, as it always did. Sam was playing along with me now, learning into me when I came close.__

You're falling  
Who's crashing now?  
(Who's crashing, who's crashing now?)  
I'm wasted, wasting time  
I'm moving on  
But you're left behind  
A pretty face with the chace  
Ain't worth the price

I'm gonna break your little heart  
Watch you take the fall  
Laughing all the way to the hospital  
'Cause there's nothing surgery can do  
I'm gonna break your little heart  
Show you to the door  
Sew yourself shut  
Now you're begging for more  
'Cause there's nothing surgery can do  
When I break your little heart in two

Up and down, up and down. The floorboards were creaking, but none of us cared as the guys started jumping along with me, just enjoying ourselves. 'Cos hey, if you can't have fun with your best friends, who can you have fun with?__

Don't be so sentimental, no  
This is love is accidental, so  
Give it up  
This was never meant to be  
More than a memory for you

Sam burst into another solo, almost equal in difficulty to the one he'd had to master in Misery Business. Hell, he could play guitar.__

I'm gonna break your little heart  
Watch you take the fall  
Laughing all the way to the hospital  
'Cause there's nothing surgery can do  
(When I break your little heart in two)  
I'm gonna break your little heart  
Show you to the door  
Sew yourself shut  
Now you're begging for more  
'Cause there's nothing surgery can do  
When I break your little heart in two  


We finished like we had yesterday, a final head-bang scrambling my mind for a few seconds. Then slow applause came from Fang, who really did look impressed.

"You're good," he acknowledged. And believe me, even just that from Fang is like God's praise. "But you look like you could need another guitar player."

Yeah, that was exactly why I'd been practising my ass off with Amy at every chance I got. So I could help the band more. And plus, I'd been jealous of Sam's skills.

"You play?" Sam asked, surprised.

"Yeah!" Iggy answered for him, looking excited. "Show him. Fang rocks."

"And you'd know how?" Sam questioned as he passed his pride and joy to Fang. He'd saved up for months to buy that thing.

"Webcam," Ig shrugged. "He's good. Seriously good."

I rocked back on my heels as Fang started fingering the strings, finding the right places for his fingers. This wasn't how it was supposed to happen. I was meant to just bring Amy in one time, enjoying the guys' shock at seeing her, then astound them with my home-learnt riffs (I'm just that awesome)...

Then his fingers started moving. They were clumsier than Sam's, but they were quicker, too. His head moved left to right as he played Beat It by MJ without a single missed note. Damn. He was _good. _He glanced up as he let the last note ring, then handed the guitar back over to Sam, shoving his hands in his pockets as we clapped. He was embarrassed. Modest.

"Wow," Dylan clapped him on the back, grinning.

"You're awesome!" Sam exclaimed as he turned his baby over in his hands, checking for places with even a hint of dullness (he shines the thing every night. Yeah, he's an idiot).

"Told you so," Iggy smiled smugly. "So, Max... can he join?"

"What?" I was shocked, I'll admit it.

"Can he join the band?" he repeated slowly, like I was an extra-thick little kid (okay... oh, shut up).

"Since when was that an audition?"

"It wasn't," Iggy rolled his eyes. "But Fang said it: we need another guitarist. Give him a shot?"

"But..."

"It's not like you guys aren't close already. So what's the problem?" Exactly the thing I'd thought about the pair of them earlier. Ironic.

"There isn't one, he's pretty damn good," I conceded. "But I've already given in the sheet for Friday, and we aren't allowed any changes or substitutions... maybe after, though?"

"Oh," Iggy said, disappointed. All the guys looked let down, actually. Hey, so was I. I wanted Fang in just as much as anybody else. Just... it wasn't like I'd hoped for it, or anything. He wasn't one of us _just _yet.

"Don't sweat it," Fang shrugged. "It's cool. Afterwards, sure."

Of course Iggy had already told Fang about the band slam. Of course he would be coming. Of course.

We were just discussing the set list for Friday (with Fang's help), when there was a light tap on the door and Jane walked in.

"Out, you guys. It's a nice day, and you've been rehearsing too much lately, anyway. You'll be fine. Get out."

WTF? We were getting kicked out for practising too much? How the hell did that work? Jane glared at me like she could hear my thoughts and started literally sheepherding us out, like actually pushing me. I'm telling you, I'm filing an assault file with the police first thing tomorrow. I'm not joking.

Iggy protested multiple times, but in the end Jane just gave him a fiver to shut him up, enough for ice-cream for all of us. Hmm... something's up. Normally she doesn't mind us practising, as long as we don't interrupt her yoga (what is it about saying one word that isn't a real word repeatedly and contorting your legs? Do enlighten me) and she was pretty stingy about money.

Something tells me she's up to something... and it can't be good, knowing Jane.

"So what do we do now?" Dylan grumbled once we were wandering the streets aimlessly.

"Music store?" Sam suggested. We all shot it down, seeing as, quite frankly, none of us could be arsed walking to town.

"Café?" Fang shrugged.

"Nah, Lissa hangs around there."

"Ugh."

"Yeah," I seconded. "Hey, we could always go skating!" It was like a band tradition. Every Friday, after school, we'd go to the local skate park, and tear up the ramps with our boards. Obviously we couldn't do it this week, though, thanks to the Band Slam, and we had nothing better to do...

"Might as well," Ig shrugged. "Did we all leave our boards?" We all nodded, thinking of the wood with wheels we'd spent hours pouring over, painting every last millimetre to perfection. Besides our instruments, which would always be number one in our hearts, they were like our children.

Fang didn't complain, so we all traipsed down to the park, bored as hell and wishing we were still practising.

"Hey," Fang nudged me with his shoulder, and I looked up at him, so not in the mood. To my surprise, he gave me one of those smiles that seem to light up the world just a little bit. "I recruited Harry Potter."

"No way! He so sticks with Dumbledore!" I protested.

"Not this time."

"Fine..." I muttered, sounding like an angry three year-old (it's my speciality). "Malfoy kicks his butt any day of the week, anyway."

"I get Ron."

"Hermione beats him, hands down!"

"Whatever you say. Lockhart."

"He's insane! Fine, I get Voldermort."

"That is so completely unfair it's amazing."

"What? You should've claimed him earlier," I smirked. "You would've thought that the Lord of Darkness would be the first person you recruited."

"...I hate you." he muttered darkly, but the spark in his eyes said otherwise.

"You know you don't," I grinned before running to catch up with the guys, who'd typically run ahead. I heard Fang's almost silent footsteps behind me, and smiled. Weird. It'd been a day, maybe even less, and already it was like he just fit in. Like he was a piece of the puzzle we'd never known we were missing, but now he was here, he just slotted in like he'd been there all along. It felt good.

**A/N: Sorry, I couldn't think of a way to end it, but hey ho. The song was Break Your Little Heart by All Time Low, and the riff in it really is awesome. Such a freaking catchy song (;**

**Review?**


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: Do I look like JP to you? ...Don't answer that. **

**A/N: Your reviews make my day (: Thanketh you muchly. And you guys all have awesome taste in music (: Sorry this is late: **

**I've finished 2 books in the days I haven't posted [one of which was the last in the Percy Jackson series... PERCABETH FTW!] and I have another 2 I want to finish (:**

**I bought Mario Galaxy 2. Addicted doesn't quite cover it. 'Nuff said [avid gamer alert]. **

**...I just haven't had time. **

**Sorry! I promise you'll get at least 2 chapters a week (: Enjoyeth...**

"The knack is to get your feet positioned right," I told Fang, grinding down a metal rod. He'd been watching me for a while, and I felt bad that he didn't have his own board. See? I'm such a kind, sweet-natured... oh, shut up.

"No," Iggy called over from where he was in line for a huge ramp that pretty much made you feel like you were weightless. "The knack is to throw yourself into the air, and hope you miss the ground... wait, that's flying..."

"Idiot," I rolled my eyes. He just grinned at me, shoving Sam off the edge as he hesitated in front of him. "Anyway..." I turned back to Fang, who was watching Ig amusedly with his dark eyes. "Think you can handle it?"

"Sure," he grabbed the board from me, and positioned it carefully before stepping on. "See? I can totally-" he cut off in a surprisingly girly scream as I pushed him. On flat ground. But of course, the idiot leaned forward, and went zooming off. Laughing, I took off after him, catching him by the arm _before _he could have his face rearranged by the brick wall he was heading towards (unfortunately, I'm talking from experience).

"Are you okay?" I asked, letting go of his arm. He leapt off my board like it was burning his feet (I wish). "I didn't hurt you, right?"

"I hate you," he glared at me again, but I could see the humour glinting in his eyes.

"What shoes are you wearing?" I ignored him (as always). "You need grippy ones. Converse are awesome." Rolling his eyes, he pulled his jeans leg up (not in that way... ew) to reveal black Converse almost identical to mine, 'cept mine had silver stars drawn over them, because they're just that cool.

"Converse," he said, stating the obvious.

"Oh. You're just crap at skateboarding then." I winked to show him I was joking, and he just rolled his eyes at me again, picked up my board and chucked it at me. I caught it lightly, and raised an eyebrow questioningly (It took me hours looking into a mirror, but I finally got the knack of it, to Iggy's major annoyance – he still can't do it. Ha).

"If you're so good..." he stepped back slightly to give me space. "Prove it."

And there, folks, is what shows he's still got a way to go before he's really one of us. When I'm not singing, I'm skateboarding. But I can't board without music, ever. It's like my life source.

"Sure," I smiled cockily, knowing that I sounded like a arrogant shit and not really caring, because when it comes to skateboarding? I can afford to be.

Pulling my headphones out of my pocket, I shoved them into my ears after checking I had Muse blasting out of them, and jumped onto the board, not even flinching when it rolled forward a few centimetres under my feet. Fang leapt back another foot or so, and I laughed at him.

"I'm not going to run you over," I promised, shouting over The Resistance, but he just nodded.

"Go on then."

"I will."

"You're clearly not."

"...Get lost." I pushed off with my foot before he could retaliate, then started to gain speed quickly. Wind rushed straight past me, whipping through my hair and sending it flying behind me, like an endless stream of water. This is one of those times when I'd like nothing better to fly.

As I approached a railing, I sneaked a look behind me, at Fang, and was satisfied to see him looking almost gob-smacked. Not exactly, because he's like an emotionless brick wall, but I'm sure if he wasn't, his jaw would be on the floor. Not literally, because that's disgusting, but you know (actually, you probably don't, but you shouldn't say that, because then it could equate to bullying. Bet you didn't know _that_).

Bending my knees, I felt the board give underneath me as I flew into the air, landing perfectly on the railing underneath me. I leant from one side to the other to keep from falling off. You know, this would be so much cooler if there were sparks jumping out from either side. But no. We just get this horrible screeching sound, which means we're grinding properly. Go figure. The end was nearing me, so I jumped up, my tiptoes just barely brushing against one side of it. It flipped underneath me, a full somersault, and I allowed myself a grin as I landed back on top of it, this time safely on solid ground.

Well. That was fun. Not one of my best rides, but hey. Fun.

"You just owned me," Fang said, surprising me: I hadn't realised he'd come up behind me.

"Nah," I shrugged. "Just loads of practice." See? I'm seriously cocky sometimes, but I'm not all that I'm made up to be. I'm just... I dunno. Just weird like that. I don't mind dishing out insults (not really all that seriously), and being all arrogant, but as soon as someone actually compliments me? I'm all shy. It kind of pisses me off, but I guess it's better than being oh so proud of myself, and completely up my own arse, right?

"Got nothing better to do?" Fang's face was serious, but his eyes were light, teasing, the only trace of emotion visible.

"What, and you have?"

"Oh, yeah," he almost smiled, but at the last moment, he managed to turn it into a lip spasm. "I was the captain of... uh..."

"Can't think of a sport?" I laughed. "Oh, wait, let me guess... cheer-leading?" I cracked up as he glowered at me.

"Not exactly," he shoved me a little, and I turned round and shoved him right back, still laughing.

"Whatever. Want another go?" I thrust my board under his nose, then giggled as he quickly moved away. "Scared, Fang?"

"Nope," he rolled his eyes. "Drinks on me?" He gestured to a little café across the street, all cutesy red and white gingham patterned parasols and white wooden furniture. It looked like somewhere Lissa and her gang of Barbies would haunt, but if Fang was offering... and I _was_ kind of thirsty... It wasn't like anyone we knew would see us.

"Nice change of the subject there... but okay," I finally agreed, tucking my board under my arm again. "I'll get the guys..." He nodded, following me as I moved through the park. A few people nodded at me respectfully; I knew most of the kids here through various competitons, and even a couple through band stuff. Only one or two people from school ever came here, seeing as our school's kind of cracked up to be all posh (I laughed. Hard) and all us skaters have got a crappy reputation, thanks to a couple of idiots who decided it'd be 'fun' to try and vault themselves over the big chain-lock fences. Using each other. Idiots.

I finally spotted them at the top of an otherwise deserted ramp, Ig and Sam in the middle of an argument, Dylan watching them. He leant his head into the palms of his hands, bored as hell despite his headphones jammed into his ears. He never got involved with any arguments, really. He was just like that. Getting along with everybody. Mediator kinda guy. If anyone was gonna see ghosts, it would be him. Not that he's creepy or anything, he's just... mellow. Yeah.

"Dyl!" I shouted loudly, but it was useless. WTH was he listening to? I settled for waving my hands like an idiot (the things I go through for my friends...). When he didn't notice me, I rolled my eyes, and, muttering under my breath, headed up the steps to the platform where they were stood.

"No way!" Ig was saying to Sam, "you're lying!"

"It's a scientific _fact_, Ig," Sam rolled his eyes. "Dinosaurs are proven to exist, Pokemon are a bunch of coloured pixels in an addictive game." Ig shook his head vigorously.

"I'm disappointed in you, Sam, I would've thought you'd see through the lies..." he looked at him disappointedly before finally noticed me, just standing there watching them. "Oh, hey, guys." Oh. Fang was behind me.

"Hey!" Sam greeted us, smiling at me, and raising his fist to Fang... hang on, WTF? They're not going to fight are... oh. They just pounded fists. I feel stupid.

"Max, will you please tell Sam that dinosaurs were a lie fed to us by evil scientists in order to cover the existence of Pokemon?" Iggy said, almost in one breath, which to be honest was just as surprising as the time I found out Lady Gaga wrote her own songs (I'm telling you, that girl must have a seriously messed up mind: I want your disease? I rest my case).

"...Iggy, your stupidity never fails to amaze me." I didn't miss a beat.

"Thank you!" Sam raised his arms to the heavens (at least, I think that's what he was doing. He might have been calling birds for all I know, though that's really something I'd expect Iggy to do, being the idiot he is). "I rest my case."

"Traitor!" Iggy jabbed his finger at me. "This is just like you skiving math class!" I must've looked slightly murderous, because he quickly dropped that subject, turning to Fang. "Fang! Tell him!" he appealed.

I glanced back at Fang, and found him much closer than I'd thought he was. So that was why my back was so warm: his iron chest was almost pressed against it. Maybe it's an iron radiator chest? I bet the Hulk has one of them. Or maybe surfers, 'cos they're like never cold on TV when they come out of the water. Not that I watch them, or anything. Ever. Like, at all. Not even a glimpse. Ella does, though. Practically glued to the TV. Unlike me. Cue shifty look.

Our eyes met for a second, and I could see that, inside, he was laughing. On the outside? Emotionless brick wall. Tactically, I took a small half-step forward, away from him. It wasn't that it wasn't comfortable, or anything, but it was kind of... weird. We were just good friends. Very, very good friends, already verging on best friends. But you know. Weird.

"I think..." Fang took his time deliberating. "This is stupid."

"Agreed," Dylan said, having pulled his headphones out at last.

"Thirded," I added in.

"He started it!" Sam defended himself, pointing at Iggy, who held his hands up in surrender.

"Pokemon will rule the world," was his parting shot before he set off down the ramp, tearing down it fast as a comet.

"Idiot," Sam muttered, stating the obvious.

"No, they won't," I rolled my eyes.

"I will," Fang finished. I turned on him, eyebrows raised.

"I believe we've already discussed this."

"I believe we have."

"And the outcome was?"

"As previously stated."

"Did I mention I hate you?"

"I believe you have," he paused. "Multiple times."

"Yeah, well-"

"Oh, shut up," Sam cut in, rolling his eyes at both of us. "You're as immature as Ig!" I gasped: that was a true insult.

"Yeah," Dylan joined in. "And what's with all the Shakespeare stuff?"

"Shakespeare stuff?" Fang and I said simultaneously, equally confused.

"You know," Dylan said vaguely. "All the posh language stuff..." Fang and I exchanged a puzzled look, before I figured it out (see, I'm not as stupid as you all obviously think).

"Oh," I shrugged. "Dunno. Just how we roll, right, Fang?" I got the feeling he didn't have a clue what the hell I was on about, but like the true trooper he is, he high-fived me right back instead of leaving me hanging which I was afraid he'd do. Ig does it all the time.

Speaking of Ig, he was still racing up and down the ramp, flipping flashily as he reached the ends each time, muttering something about Pikachu shocking us to death. And, may I just ask, WTF is a Pikachu? Is it like a poking thing? A guitar? Sigh. So many questions.

"Anyway," Sam stuffed his hands in his pockets, ignoring Iggy like we'd all practised at for many, many years. "What'd you want?"

Huh? Oh, yeah. We'd actually come up here for a purpose. Well, you learn new things every day.

"Oh, yeah," I grinned, trying to cover up my momentary memory loss (my brain never did come back from Hawaii. Guess it just likes hula dancing... ew, I just pictured that). "Fang's buying drinks, at the caf. Coming?"

"That one?" Sam asked doubtfully, pointing to the little café across the road. I nodded.

"What's wrong with that?"

"Everything," Dylan pointed out helpfully (note the sarcasm there).

"Hey!" Well, the café wasn't about to defend itself... "People don't look at you and say, 'Ew, what's wrong with that? Everything!' do they?"

Everyone just looked at me for a second, before bursting out laughing.

"Priceless," Dylan choked out between laughing.

"Max..." Sam just shook his head at me, joining Dylan in his laughing fit. Even Fang was chuckling to himself.

I obviously just have the ability to make people laugh. And I deliberately worded that so I sounded like a superhero. I'm just that cool. Uh, yeah, not.

"Whatever," I felt my cheeks flush a little. "You coming, or not?"

"What's in it for us?" Iggy called over from the opposite platform, where he'd obviously been listening to everything we'd been saying. Typical. He storms off, then comes crawling back to us... okay, not exactly, but that's the vision I have in my head, so don't ruin it for me.

"Free drinks," Fang called over, a half-smile gracing his lips.

"Duh," I added for extra measure. Ig stuck his tongue out at me.

"I'm in, then," he winked at us. "Just let me put my board away..."

"Yeah, same," Sam gave in. "Right behind you, Pokemon Master."

"Finally! My true title has been recognised!" I heard Iggy say as they headed off together. I was glad to see Sam whack him over the head with his skateboard as I wasn't there to do it myself.

"Save me," Dylan muttered, rolling his eyes before smiling at me. "Chuck us your board, Max, we'll meet you guys over there. Get us a good seat, would you?"

He pulled my board out of my grasp and traipsed off, leaving me completely surprised. Since when did the guys do nice things for me? They were really my best friends ever, but we have an unofficial agreement that our entire relationship's based on arguments, pranks and insults. It's just the way we stick together. We can slag each other off something rotten to one another (never seriously, of course), but say one word against any of us, and you'll have the wrath of all six of us on you (me, Iggy, Dylan, Sam, Ella and Nudge).

"Come on," Fang said quietly, touching my elbow to grab my attention from wherever it had been (I'm pretty sure it joined my brain in Hawaii. Just a sneaking suspicion).

We strolled over to the little café, taking our time in the glorious sunshine. It was probably the last of it we'd get for a while, seeing as it was the middle of September. Just starting hockey season, which, though I'd never admit, I was seriously looking forward to.

"I thought you'd already said no to the café?" Fang asked as we crossed the road, avoiding the heavy traffic.

"Meh," I shrugged. "Lissa and that lot prefer Starbucks. It's just over-priced enough to complain about all the time to the waitresses."

"I'm not surprised," he muttered darkly as we pushed open the over-decorated vanilla-covered door. It let out a soft tinkle as we walked in. It was just as girly inside as it was outside: heart-shaped lanterns floating above the tables, all cream tablecloths with soft cushioned chairs, lit with gentle pink light. Fang sniffed, then covered his nose: it smelt overpoweringly like my Mum's greenhouse (not surprising, considering the amount of time she spends in there. Apparently, it's her favourite child. Then it's Ella. Then it's Nudge, Ella's twin sister she never had. Then it's Iggy, the son she never had. Then it's the rest of the population of the United States. Then it's the population of the UK, Australia... every country you can ever think of, _then_ it's me. She loves me really).

"Ew," I whispered, just loudly enough so he could hear.

"Tell me about it," he whispered back, before ordering five Cokes and practically running outside.

"God," I said as soon as we'd both escaped. "Can it stink any _more _in there?"

"I know," Fang brushed his way-too-long fringe out of his eyes. "It sucks." We sat down at one of the more bare picnic tables opposite each other.

"Man, it's so hot!" I pulled my hoodie off, revealing the My Chemical Romance t-shirt beneath (that was one hell of a concert. We'd had such a freaking _awesome _time. Legendary night. No kidding).

"Tell me about it," Fang repeated, unzipping his own black jacket. Underneath, he was wearing a black and blue Zutons t-shirt. "So..."

"So..." I leant my elbows on the table, placing my chin in my palms.

"You know when I rule the world?" I glared at him. "When _one of us_ rules the world," he quickly corrected, rolling his eyes. "What are you gonna do?"

Hm. Actually, I'd never thought about it. I'd just figured I'd kill anyone who _seriously _annoyed me (*cough*Lissa*cough*) and take it from there really.

"I guess I'll just re-build human civilisation," I shrugged. "To my liking."

"Of course," Fang nodded. "If you could only have three different professions left to train for, in the whole world, which would you choose?"

Hey, that reminded me of one of the many sci-fi books I read: all about only letting so many different cliques survive, or allowing different types of people in, etc.

"Doctors, obviously. Probably scientists. And the people who invented Converse." It was a no-brainer, if I was being honest. "You?"

He chuckled a little; he seemed to be doing that in the last hour more than he had over two days.

"Same," he agreed. "Except guitarists, as well."

"You said three jobs," I reminded him. "So instead of who?"

"Scientists," he said. "Duh."

We laughed together for a moment, then our eyes met again. You know, he's got quite nice eyes, really. Very dark brown. Almost obsidian-coloured. Nearly black. Not quite, though, he's got little specks of hazel spitting out around his pupil.

Not that I noticed, or anything.

"Hey, guys!" Sam sank down on the far side of my bench as the waitress came out, the tray of drinks balanced precariously in her hand. Iggy sat beside Fang as Dylan flopped down beside me, nodding at me in acknowledgement.

We talked, for what seemed like hours, about pretty much everything that we'd never needed to talk about. Pokemon, Harry Potter, who would win in a death match between Voldermort and Gazzy (Gazzy, if you were wondering. He'd just gas the Lord of Darkness, and that would be the end of that) and the ultimate chick flick (She's The Man, according to Iggy. He was questioned thoroughly as to his sexuality, I can assure you).

"Shouldn't we be headed back?" Sam finally asked, once we were onto our fourth cokes, watching the sun disappear, leaving only hazy beams of light as a reminder of its visit.

"Nah," Iggy said from his spot lazing on the grass beside our table. "It's ages 'till eight." Eight was the established curfew for all of us. Seven pm if Iggy was with us.

"Right now," I said with a smile, "I just want to watch the sun roll in with my best friends." They all turned and gave me sweet smiles, even Fang. What can I say? The sun softens us all.

And that was how I came to be lying on the grass, sandwiched between Iggy and Fang, outside Aunt Bessie's Tea Pot, until long after eight, just living, laughing, and, more than anything, feeling alive. With my best friends.

**A/N: Aw. (: Anyone guess what song I stole some lyrics from for that last scene? It's an All Time Low song [yet again]. Sorry for not replying to any reviews for the last chapter, I'm just rushing to get this one up, but I promise I'll reply to any for this chapter. **

**Review?**


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: Newsflash: I'm a girl. JP's a man. _Duh._**

**A/N: You guys so make my day (: Over 50 reviews already? Man. Insane. I'd like to recommend my friend's story, Making Memories, because she works on it as much as I work on this, and honestly? It deserves more recognition (: Her penname's LOVEROFFANG. So check that out, if you feel like it (; Anyhow, enjoyeth!**

"MAX!" someone yelled my name at the top of their voice, sprinting towards me like a blur. Actually, if I squint, it vaguely resembles Nudge. I side-stepped before she could barrel into me (again, talking from experience there) and I lost all feeling in my stomach. Her hugs kill, you know. I've actually contemplated calling the police, and telling them to add Nudge to their list of risks you should never take that... then I realised that she was my sister's best friends (and one of my good ones), and that would be totally mean. Still. It's true.

"Nudge, I've warned you- Oh, hey, Ella." I was just about to give Nudge another lecture on the disadvantages of strangling, when El came up behind her, her eyes bright. Wait. Too bright. Hang on. What's th-Oh, no. Time to make a run- they each grabbed one of my arms, way too strongly for two thirteen year-old girls who were too obsessed with Justin Bieber for their own good.

"So, we're just going to sit you down right here..." Ella chuckled, setting me down on an empty table, just far enough that the guys could pretend to ignore us.

"I'm going to kill you," I muttered darkly as they each sat either side of me, their hands still gripping my forearms.

"Max! Chill!" Nudge laughed. "We're not, like, going to do anything! Honest! We just wanted to talk to you about Friday night!"

"Yeah, the Band Slam. So what?"

"Oh, I forgot about that..." Ella's brow furrowed for a second before she brightened again. "It only goes on till nine, right? We can do that, Nudge."

"Yeah! It'll be like Extreme Makeovers!"

"Excuse me?" I didn't have a clue what they were on about, really, but I got the feeling I was somehow being insulted.

"Max, you are so hopeless!" They both giggled as I tried to catch Fang's eyes. He looked up, straight at me. I widened my eyes frantically, still unable to move my freaking hands. His gaze turned confused, until Iggy, smiling, leaned over to whisper something in his ear. When Ig moved away again, his lips were twitching, and he just winked at me before turning away. Grr. I hate them.

"I'm going to murder you both in your sleep," I glared at them, one of my special go-die-in-a-corner ones. "And I'll enjoy it." I added for extra measure. They both just rolled their eyes, and giggled in that infuriating way they do.

I love them both to death, but Goddammit, I swear, once I'm out of this... they better run for their lives... or else.

"Whatever you say, Max," Nudge smiled brightly. "El, you got the poster right? I'm so excited! It's gonna be so awesome! Like awesomer than the last one! And that was awesome!"

How many times can you use awesome in one breath? I think Nudge just broke the world record. Remind me to check the Guinness World Records book, would you?

"Got it," Ella pulled something out of her bag, a piece of glossy A5 paper. "Do we show it now, or torture her some more?" Hmm. Seems my little sister did inherit _some _of my evil mastermind traits. Why does she have to discover them now? I mean, seriously.

"Now, or you'll be torturing me too!" Nudge practically tore the paper out of Ella's hands, her eyes scanning the text greedily. Oh dear God. If this is one of their ploys to get me to buy them Cheryl Cole's tickets, I may have to trash Ella's wardrobe. It's just a step I'm willing to take. The last time I did, Ella's screaming was going on 'till at least midnight. And then she wrote all over my walls in lipstick. Still. It was damn worth it.

"Guys, seriously. I just want—NO."

"Oh, Max!" they both whined in perfect unison. Nudge was still waving the paper in my face, emblazoned with the words: **WINTER WONDERLAND, THE DANCE OF DREAMS! **I personally think it should be the dance of twits, but whatever makes Principal C happy. What did I do last year when they tried to rope me into this? ...Oh, yeah. We held an anti one, and drove the girls insane with our plottings to sabotage the real one.

"Please Max!" Nudge begged. I mean seriously begged. As in, got down on her knees. In the middle of the crowded cafeteria. That's one hand free, and that's more than enough to get the hell outta here.

"No." I threw Ella's hand off of my arm, and started to walk towards the guys with the sole intention of strangling both Fang and Iggy. They attacked me from behind, but this time they were no match for an irritated Max.

"I bet Iggy's going!" Ella tried, grabbing for my wrist. I pulled it free, snorting.

"Right. Yeah."

"He is! I so bet he is! Isn't he Ella? See! Ella says he is!" ...Three guesses who that came from.

"He's probably training his Pokemon," I rolled my eyes as I finally sank down beside Fang, smacking his shoulder none-too-gently. "I hate you."

He turned to me, his dark eyes sparking with humour and curiousity.

"What for this time?"

"Excuse me? They were killing me!" I narrowed my eyes at them again as they took their seats opposite Sam and Iggy respectively.

"If killing you is inviting you to the dance, then sure," Ella rolled her eyes at me. She so gets that from me. "Iggy, are you going?"

"You're going, right? And Sam, you're going with Amber, aren't you? I wonder if she can get in... I hope she can, like, since she's from the other school..." The day that girl shuts up will be the day Katie Price has been single for over a week. Yeah, never.

"I dunno," Sam shrugged. "She's coming to the Band Slam, but after that..."

"Wait," I was actually incredulous. "You're not actually thinking of going?" He just shrugged again and took a large gulp of his lemonade. Ugh.

"See! Sam's gonna go," Ella grinned. Sam opened his mouth to protest, but then closed it again. Resistance is futile against the big-mouth duo. "Ig?"

"Meh," he sighed into his hands. "Lily asked me..." Lily was a pretty redhead with big emerald eyes that had been the object of Iggy's affections for forever (besides his beloved Pikachu, of course, who, I'd now learnt, was some kind of electricity-pumped rat. Wow. Some people have... interesting... imaginations, huh?).

"Seriously?" I raised my eyebrows. For Ig, this was a pretty big deal. He didn't really date too much, unless he was serious about the girl. Before I smacked him around a bit, he was a player, just using girls for whatever he felt like (movies, dinner, making out... you know), but now? Nah. Sure, he was gorgeous and all (I'm saying that from a purely best friend point of view. Me and Iggy? EWEWEW. I just imagined that... I feel unclean), with his pure gold hair, and piercing blue eyes, but no one really caught his eye any more, you know? Lily, though, was the complete opposite of anyone he used to date. She was really, really sweet. As in, if someone bought her flowers, or called her pretty, it'd probably make her day. Normally, being me, people like this seriously annoyed the hell outta me, but Lily? Yeah, she was okay. I kinda liked her.

"Yup," he nodded, trying to the fact that he was smiling like an idiot. "She understands about me and Pikachu..."

"Ig, I find the fact that you're in a relationship with coloured pixels _slightly _disturbing..." Fang, who'd been silent up 'till now, surprised us all with a full sentence with more than five words.

"Don't knock it 'till you've tried it," Ig winked, constituting a chorus of 'Eww's' from Ella and Nudge. I just rolled my eyes at him.

"You're disgusting," I told him.

"Never said I wasn't," Ig grinned. "But seriously... don't knock it."

"You worry me," Sam laughed.

"I worry everyone," Ig winked again, this time at Ella. She completely blanked him, instead turning to Nudge and whispering something in her ear. A few minutes later, they both excused themselves and walked away. What was up with them? Normally they tried to get my agreements in writing (never happened, and never will).

"Is she okay?" Iggy asked, nodding towards where Ella had just disappeared.

"Yeah," I shrugged. "You know what she's like..."

We spent the rest of lunch, well, eating, and just talking. The dance didn't come up again, thank God. I bet Ig'll go with Lily, though, and what kind of a friend would I be if I didn't let him? Sigh. Sam'll end up going with Amber, his girlfriend in the school near ours, he always does. They've been together almost a year now... Wow. Seems like forever. Huh. If I went, Fang _would _come, no matter what he might say to try and get out of it, and Dylan...

hey, he hasn't spoken a word. Funny, no one even noticed. Oops.

I turned round to talk to him, and found him already staring at me intently. Wha—wow. He has... nice eyes. Really nice eyes. Totally the opposite from Fang's, which are all doom and gloom (really reflecting his personality... haha), they're like... bright blue, with kind of green-hazel specks in them, reflecting me all gob-smacked. I mean, reflecting me raising one eyebrow at him.

"You okay?" I asked.

"Yeah, fine," he smiled at me, and I felt something move in my stomach, just a little. Huh. Must have stomach ache, or something. Never mind.

We chatted for a while longer, mainly about the charts (Iggy's attachment to Lady Gaga was growing. He knew the words to Bad Romance, and showed his love for her by flaunting his... anatomy on the table. Oh dear God. I'm bleaching my brain when I get home), sometimes about the Band Slam, but still no one said anything about the dance. Thank God.

"See you tonight at... Iggy's again, innit?" Sam slung his bag over his shoulder as the bell went.

"Yup," Iggy nodded, then his face totally lit up. Cue worrying. "YOU CAN MEET PIKACHU!"

All of our faces suddenly became well-acquainted with our palms.

"I'm going," I announced, still shaking my head at Ig. "Now. Coming, Fang?"

He threw me one of those half-smiles and nodded. I saluted Sam and Dylan, rolled my eyes at Ig, and then me and Fang were swallowed into the group of people leaving yet again. This time, it was worse. I could feel myself beginning to hyperventilate, and just when I thought I was going to collapse, I emerged into the open hallways, and suddenly I could breathe again. God. My eyes are all sweaty... no, they're not tears. Swear.

"Max?" Fang came up beside me, placing a large, warm hand on my shoulder. "Are you okay?" I took a deep breath, then looked up at him and smiled the most convincingly genuine smile I could.

"Fine!" I said, way too brightly for me. I'm not emo or anything, but call me preppy and your face will meet my fist. Although, in Lissa's case, if I had my way, my fist and her face would be best friends by now. Fang studied me for a second, his dark eyes carefully taking in every aspect of my expression. I raised my eyebrows, folding my arms.

"No, you're not," he finally said. "You look weak. Here, lean on me."

"I am n-" I started to protest, but his touch silenced me. His arm wrapped round my waist cautiously, pulling me towards me, and although I would never, ever admit it, I was glad for the sturdy, solid strength he gave me. My knees stopped shaking quite so much, and his arm loosened as I allowed myself to put my weight on him.

"See?" he rolled his eyes, and started guiding me awkwardly down the corridors. "I'm not that scary."

"Want a bet?" I wasn't beyond arguing. According to Iggy, I never am. I like to think that's one of my positive points... just about everyone else disagrees. Sigh. Can't win 'em all, I guess.

"I don't think you're in a particularly wise position to be making bets right now, Max," Fang looked sideways at me, amusement dancing in his eyes like starlight.

"Want a bet?" …No comment.

"Again, not a good position," he rolled his eyes.

"Want a bet?" I have nothing to say on the matter, besides the fact that pretty much any part of my body that lets me think rationally is in Hawaii, possibly hula-dancing, and definitely getting as drunk as an organ can. Can an organ get drunk? No, not it can't. And the fact that I'm actually thinking about that proves that they obviously can, otherwise I'd be thinking normally and I wouldn't be leaning on Fang like this.

"Is that all you can say?"

"...Pretty much."

He chuckled under his breath as he tried to navigate us through a door without letting go of me. It was a long, embarrassing procedure, and in the end I pulled myself free of his grasp and walked through on my own. Thank God my knees held out. I so have to do something about this claustrophobic stuff, because, hello? Maximum Martinez does _not _need _anyone _calling her weak. Or helping her stay upright. Can you even say embarrassing?

"You sure you're okay?" he asked dubiously as we walked side-by-side again, down an otherwise deserted corridor.

"I'm fine, honestly," I gave him a smile that wasn't forced, and he shot me one of rare ones back that looked as though a shard of sun had implanted itself into his face, it was so bright and light and happy and... I'm rambling. I have English next, leave me alone. I'm just getting prepped. Right.

"Good," he said, holding the home-room door open for me. Gentleman, Fang, huh?

When we were sat down in our seats, I sneaked another glance at him, and saw with some surprise that his gaze was on Lissa, a seat or so behind us. Then I saw the disgust barely registering in his face, just in the way his jaw was set, his eyebrows crooked. Just enough for me to tell, nowadays. I could read any emotion Fang was feeling, unless he deliberately tried to hide it, but even then there were glimmers of it shining through the mask.

"Hey," I leaned over to whisper in his ear. He flinched, then relaxed when it was just me. "Thanks."

He drew away to gauge my expression, but, for once, I was completely genuine. Instead of pulling an Iggy ('Did the great Maximum Martinez just _apologise?_' and then pretending to faint, as he's been known to do on several occasions. The best time was when he did it in Science and got sent out for 'immature behaviour'. Oh, Mr Simmons, you don't know the half of it), he just nodded, his crescent-moon smile saying it all.

"Don't sweat it," he said with a wink. With that, we left for English after a typically flustered Mrs Davies called register.

**X X X**

"That sucked." Sam stated after another false start of Misery Business. It was just like last Sunday: we were completely out of time, losing the thread of the song every few minutes. Sam was the only one _not _preoccupied: Iggy was full of thoughts about Lily (he can deny it all he wants, he's totally smitten. Itd

's hilarious, seeing as, you know, we know him. This is the guy who used to dump girls after one date, simply because he saw someone with bigger breasts); Dylan's head with completely in the clouds, which wasn't at all like the calm, focused Dyl we knew, and me? I don't know. I just can't get anything right.

"We just need to stay..." I was about to give one of my 'up and at 'em' speeches, when I realised it was pointless. We just needed a rest from endless practice. It's meant to be fun, right? Well, we'd been doing so much rehearsing lately that we were all sick and tired of it. The Band Slam was only in a couple of days, but, hey, we'd done enough in preparation already. Why spend another couple of hours playing when we could be outside, hanging out? "Nope, you're right, we suck." I set my microphone down.

"We're done?" Sam raised an eyebrow at me. Hey, it's not unheard of for me to let us all go early... actually, it is. Normally they have to force me... which isn't easy, but you know, three guys on one girl? No fair.

"Yup," I shrugged. "No point in just getting worse, right?"

"Agreed, darling," Iggy gave me a wink. Dear God, the gay act was back. "Me and my dear Pikachu have some making up to do, anyway..."

"What?" Sam turned his attention to the guy who was busy wrapping his tie around his head in a bandanna. When I raised one eyebrow, he grinned.

"Pikky hates me having my hair in my face," he winked. "Says it gets in the way of... well, you don't need to know," he winked suggestively again. "And, Sammy sweetheart, we had a little fight. Nothing too serious, you know, she was just getting jealous of the pictures of Lady Gaga on my walls..."

Oh my God. You are seriously kidding me. I looked over at Fang, who was lounging on a sofa in the corner.

"He's not lying," he confirmed. "About the posters, I mean."

"Ig, we're getting you professional help," Dylan finally zoned in, smiling. "Lay off, guys. He has a serious medical condition." I snorted.

"Which would be?" Sam asked pointedly.

"OGD." Dylan grinned, showing off his newly brace-less pearly white teeth.

"Which would be?" Sam repeated.

"Obsessive Gaga disorder," Dylan laughed. "With a hint of OPD. Obsessive Pikachu disorder."

"A hint?" I laughed, and everyone joined in as Iggy stormed out. Meh. He'd have forgotten all about it in the morning, he always does.

"I'm outta here," Sam said a few minutes later, zipping up his electric guitar with a flourish. "Coming?"

"Nah," Dylan glanced at me before turning back to Sam. "I'mma hang here for a while, first."

"I live here," Fang pointed out unnecessarily.

"Bye," I said pointedly, smiling to show I didn't mean it rudely. Not too much, anyway.

"Good," Sam swung his guitar onto his back. "'Cos I'm off to see Amber. See you guys tomorrow." He grinned at me, fist-fived Fang, nodded at Dylan, then was gone.

"Max," Dylan said suddenly after a few moments of silence during which we all just gazed at each other, waiting for someone to start a conversation. I jumped a little, already used to the quiet. "Can I have a word?"

"Sure, 'sup?"

"Um," he glanced at Fang. "Alone?"

"Don't mind me," Fang raised his eyebrows.

"He doesn't bite," I grinned. "Unless you annoy him."

Fang rolled his eyes at me, but I could see he was humoured.

"Please, Max," Dylan was practically begging. "It has to be alone."

"Um, okay?" I stood up, giving Fang a WTF look. He gave me a totally reassuring shrug (sarcasm, yo) before I walked out. Dylan followed, shutting the door behind us before stuffing his hands in his pockets again.

"What's up with you? Are you okay?" I asked, letting a little concern leaking into my voice.

"I'm fine," he said, but his voice was tense, nervous. WTH? This wasn't Dylan. OMG. Clones are taking over the world! ...Yeah, brain? I could really use you right now.

"What's up then?"

"I was just wondering if..." he paused, and I was tempted to say something inappropriate like 'spit it out, love!' but I didn't. See? I'm so self-controlled. Stop laughing. "If you wanted to go to the dance with me?"

He immediately turned his gaze to the floor, embarrassed.

"What? As mates?" I'm sure that's all he means. I don't like him like... No. I really don't.

"I..." he seemed to be fighting with himself. "Just... you know."

I knew alright, but I wasn't about to admit it to myself.

...Okay, fine. Dylan liked me. And not in a mates way. A gorgeous, blue-eyed boy with shiny brown hair liked me. Unlike other boys, he was nice, mature, and he could magic with a bass guitar. Any girl's dream, right?

So why wasn't I thrilled?

"Dylan," my voice was much stronger than I'd thought it would be. Hey, maybe I can do this... "I'll think about it. 'Kay? I'll get back to you tomorrow. Promise."

He looked up, his eyes full of surprise and happiness. He'd just expected an outright no, because me, date? Nah.

"Okay, awesome," he smiled, and I could see the normal, laid-back Dylan re-emerging. He checked his watch, and swore. "I better go. See you tomorrow!"

He ran off, looking back once to give me another ecstatic grin. I waved as casually as I could imagine before, upon hearing the door close, burying my face in my hands. Oh, God. I'm so freaking confused. What do I do? If I say no, it could destroy our entire friendship, and I haven't spent years hanging with the guy for that to happen. But if I say yes, I'm kind of betraying myself, and my real feelings.

Damn, I'm deep. I wonder where I can find the job application for the next Yoda?

"Max?" Fang.

"Hey," I said, a little weakly, turning to face him.

"What's up?"

"Nothing, really," I'm not lying. I'm just twisting the truth. There's a difference, honest. "Just stressed about the whole dance thing..."

"Tell me about it," he rolled his eyes. "We could go together, if you want. As friends."

"What?" Please no. Don't let Fang be so nice after the Dylan thing.

"You know," he wasn't embarrassed in the slightest. He really did mean as friends. Thank God. "We could have fun."

"Sounds awesome," I smiled. "But I'll get back to you tomorrow, 'kay? I'm still trying to find a way out of it." Ha. More like a way out of this boy mess.

"Sure," he chuckled a little. "Want to do that English homework?"

"Anything to keep me away from Ella," I laughed.

On the outside, I was having a laugh with my best friend, teasing one another about the various people we were recruiting, slagging off one another's taste in music even though it was practically the same, and doing next to nothing on the homework. On the inside, I was completely freaking out.

WTH am I gonna do?

**A/N: Hope you liked it! (: Sorry it's so late again, just school and stuff. Holidays soon, then I'll be able to seriously write heaps for you guys. Next chapter, Band Slam (: Expect it soon. Promise. And remember to check out that story, if you will. Making Memories by LOVEROFFANG. It'll make you laugh, honest. You have my word... don't make a sarcastic comment about that, I can tell you're thinking about it. **

**Review?**


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: I own my JP books [I can actually say he's my favourite author for books other than MR. I'm reading Private right now ^-^]. If I was JP, I wouldn't buy my own books. **

**A/N: I love you guys. You know that, right? Nearly 70 reviews already. And I love how most of you mention Iggy and Pikachu ^-^ Igkachu FTW! [I'm actually changing the summary of this to Eggy/Igkachu. No joke] (; The fact that one of you actually caught the HP reference with Lily made me smile even more. Oh, and sorry for all the anonymous reviews I can't reply to, but honestly you guys, I appreciate it all so much. Just keep making my day. Enjoyeth... **

I was just debating whether or not to sign onto my almost non-existent Facebook account, or look up some lyrics for a song I'd been listening to lately when Ella burst into my room, a large book clutched in her arms. Aw, little Ella's discovered the wonders of reading... uh, not.

"Right, we need to pick out your dress," she said all matter-of-factly as she sat down on my bed (for once, it was made. I know, I amaze myself sometimes). "You like blue, right? Nudge says blue'll look good on you, bring out your eyes..." she looked up, gazing into my eyes. "Must've forgotten they were brown... oh well, I'm sure I can get some contacts in time... I'll have to order them tonight though..."

Okay. Now imagine that with no punctuation whatsoever and you'll have something vaguely resembling Ella's last speech. Will someone please remind me when I actually agreed to go to the freaking dance? Yeah, _never._ I'm still trying to figure out how to let Dylan down gently without ruining anything between us. Though, telling him I plan to go with Fang (if I go at all, which I _won't_) probably won't help it all that much. Damn.

"Ella," I took a deep breath. I'm not mad. I am not mad. Not mad... Okay, I'm mad. "I already told you, I'm _not _going."

She looked up at me, all big blue eyes. Please, please not the Bambi eyes. Seriously. The girl's a master at them, and combined with her sweet little sister act? Ugh. Nauseating. And I normally give in (that bit was last because it's the least important. Honest).

"Sure you are, Max," her voice was small, innocent. Look away, Max, look away. Eye contact is death. "It's going to be amazing, and you're going to have an awesome time with all of us. _Right_?"

Just don't look at her. If you look away, it'll be that much easier to say no. Harder to smack her one, but easier to say no. Do not look. You already know what she'll look like. Dinner-plate-sized eyes, almost swimming with tears, hair falling around her face just right to look like an angel...

"Ell—Oh for the love of all that's holy..." I'd made the mistake of glancing over at her, and found her texting. Damn. Anti-climatic much? "Are you _texting?_"

"Hm?" she looked up, surprised. "Oh, yeah. Asking Nudge for an alternate colour, since last time I ordered contacts they took like three days to get here, and you only have one." she smiled like one of those freaky anime kids in the Pokemon series Iggy's obsessed with (he says Pikachu bullies him into it, since it makes her feel like a star... For once, I actually have no comment).

"Ella, leave it," I rolled my eyes. "I'm not going."

"Oh, _Max_," she stretched out the 'a'. "Why not?"

"Because I don't want to do. Duh."

"It'll be fun! Promise!"

"I don't care."

"Iggy and Sam are going!" 

"You think that'll influence my decision in any way?"

"Well... no... but..."

"Exactly," I sighed. Bored much? "Drop it, El."

"Is this because you don't have a date?"

"_Hell _no."

"'Cos neither do me and Nudge, and we're still going!"

"I really don't care, El," I said, spinning my chair around so I didn't have to face her any more. She jumped up and pulled it back round towards her, dumping the fat book in my lap. _Dress-Shopping For Dummies _was balanced on top of her latest Next catalogue. Two fat books. Yay me (the next time I mimic London from The Suite Life, shoot me. And I don't watch Disney, Ella does. Savvy?).

"Just look at them," she begged. "You might see something you like!" she gave me one of her looks that make her look like a kicked puppy before _finally _starting towards the door. Just as I was about to punch the air, she turned around again. Dammit. "Hang on. Did someone ask you? Is that why you're freaking?"

"No," I said defensively, turning away from her to dump the books on my desk. I spun back round, arms folded. God, is this really the best thing she can do right now? Okay, I'm annoyed. ...Fine, that was out of order. Sorry.

"Oh. Em. Gee!" Please, no. Not now. What did I do to deserve this, Lord? Why me? I can so see him leaning down now like why not? Thanks. "Who?"

"What d'you mean, who?" Play the dummy, Max. Even if it is really hard because you're so damn smart... I'm kidding, by the way. I'm not that far up my own arse.

"Who asked you?" she pouted, moving away from the door to sit on my bed again. Really, Ella, really?

"_No one_," I stressed, reaching for the black iPod classic resting on my bedside table. Maybe I can drown her out with Delain... Go Away would be a good choice, no?

"Nu-uh," Ella leapt to grab my iPod, glaring at me. "You are so not having this back until you tell me who asked you."

"Ella, don't make me do this," I raised my eyebrows, eyes narrowed. Standing up, I took a step closer to her. I'm not _seriously _going to hurt her, God! Are you insane, or just extraordinarily stupid? Have I not said, around a million times (possibly more), that I would never, ever, really hurt one of us (excluding Iggy)? Thank you.

"Max..." Ella cowered away from me, hugging my iPod to her chest. I'm going to kill her. Not literally, duh. You think I want blood over my guitar? No, no I do not. Amy'd never forgive me.

"Ella."

"No!"

"Just give it me, and no one'll get hurt."

"N-" she cut off as I lunged, pouncing on her to pin her down then grab my life from her hands.

"Thank you very much," I winked, bowing to an imaginary audience once I'd peeled myself off of her.

"Ugh," she groaned, sitting up and rubbing her head. That is so dramatic. I hardly touched her, you know, apart from jumping on her. "Fine, if you won't tell me, I'm asking Fang! He's always with you! I bet you're like Romeo and Juliet secretly!" she spit the last part out at me in anger before running out and slamming the door behind her. Ah, Ella. The drama queen. Always good for a hilarious overreaction at any sleepover.

Wait. Did she say she was asking Fang? Dammit.

"Phone, phone, phone," I muttered, scanning the room for my iPhone (yes, I saved up for _years. _Iggy still hates me for it). Yeah, I talk to inanimate objects. Whatever. Just be glad I didn't name it (Amy would get jealous).

Oh. There it is. Exactly where I left it. Where it always is. In my pocket. Blonde moment there.

"Yo," Fang answered after a few moments of ringing. Wait... what exactly was I going to say to him? That my little sister was on the warpath because I wouldn't tell her who asked me to the dance, and he couldn't say? He didn't even know. Apart from him, of course.

Well, I feel stupid.

"Max?" he prompted. WTH AM I GOING TO SAY?

"Um..." how intelligent am I? I know, I know. No need to cheer. "Wanta pizza?" Ooh. Fail there with the Italian accent.

Hang on. Please, please tell me I didn't just ask Fang if he wanted a pizza. _In an Italian accent. _I am officially hiding in my room for the rest of my life. Or hitting him hard enough so he contracts amnesia... hmm... I'm actually leaning towards the second idea, but you know, that could have legal issues.

"Uh..." he said confusedly. I don't blame him. "No?"

"Sorry," I laughed it off. Yes! Finally! A word without an accent! "I think we need a conference call with my brain." Of course. I redeem myself, then say something twice as stupid. Well done, Max, gold star for stupidity.

"I know the number," Fang offered.

"Whatever," I rolled my eyes, and no, I don't care if he can't see me. Effect, people.

"So 'sup?"

"Just..."

Do I say it? Do I leave it? Damn brain, leaving me for Hawaii. I am so not paying for the plane tickets. Hang on... does a lone brain need a plane ticket? Hm... so many questions, so little answers.

"Hang on." I heard a door slam, footsteps, and a murmured conversation I couldn't hear properly that I'm guessing was between him and Iggy (and possibly Pikachu). "Is this about the fact that Ella's just burst in her demanding to talk to me?"

"Possibly," I admitted. I think I'm going to type up a list: 10 Ways To Murder Your Little Sister. Then tape it to her door. Excellent.

"I'll tell her I'm out," he said.

"Is Ig's stupidity catchable? _You'll _tell her _you're _out?"

"You're a living example of that, Max." It took me a second to figure out that he meant Ig's idiocy was rubbing off on me. That is a true insult.

"Excuse me," I gasped. "I bet you're secretly dating... um... what's it called...? Oh yeah! ...Wait, no..."

"Fail," he muttered, but I could hear him chuckling quietly. "And I'll send my army down to meet her."

"What army?" I murmured. He evidently didn't hear me, as there was no sarcastic remark in return. There was some strange scuffling noise on his side of the phone as he covered part of it. Probably talking to the happy couple.

"Ig told her I'm out," his voice came through again, deep with amusement, probably at some comment Iggy made (did I mention I hate him?).

"Actually, knowing Ig, he's almost definitely said that you said you're out," I grinned.

"...Damn. You're right." I heard him run to Ig's room and ask him exactly what he said. Iggy replied with something I couldn't hear, then there was a slapping sound. I laughed as I realised it was the sound of Fang slapping his own forehead.

"Don't worry about it. She's back anyway, if the slamming doors I can hear aren't an illusion," I said loudly into the phone, hoping he had it on speaker. "Iggy's just an idiot."

"Hey! That's offensive!" Iggy called out.

"It's meant to be," I laughed, grinning to myself as I spun in lazy circles on my awesome chair.

"I'm leaving," Fang announced. There was the sound of a door shutting as he spoke, "the posters were just too much."

"Lady Gaga, right?"

"Her, many Pokemon ones, several ones of Cheryl Cole, and then there's a Miley Cyrus one taped to his ceiling. Above his bed."

I literally facepalmed.

"Just stay clear. The smell's bad enough."

"Agreed."

"Oh, and about the dance..." Look at me being all mature, and bringing it up first! Truth is, that conversation just completely made up my mind. If I'm going to the dance, then I'm going with someone I'm going to have fun with, a good time that I'll remember with a laugh. With Fang? A definite. With Dylan? Probably not. It'll be all awkward, and... ugh. I don't do awkward, just like I don't do love or any mushy feelings. Not that I'm a rock, or anything, just... no boys (unless they uncannily resemble Orlando Bloom). It's an unofficial rule, and pretty much everyone sticks to it.

"Yeah?"

"It'd be awesome to go with you," I smiled. "As friends, obviously." I was quick to add the last statement, even though it wasn't really needed.

"Cool," Fang didn't let much emotion drip into his voice, but I could tell he was pleased. "After the Band Slam?"

"Sure. Expect Converse and jeans." I laughed, pleased to hear him chuckle on the other side of the line. "Preferably ripped ones."

"Oh no," there was a voice from the doorway, and I spun to see Ella leaning on one side of it, one hand sliding up the side, the other jutting out on her hip, Hollywood style. _Shit. _She just HAD to be listening, didn't she? That is so freaking typical. "Expect a pretty dress and heels. Picked out by me and Nudge, of course!"

"What did you give me this for, then?" I said in annoyance, forgetting the phone as I gestured to the books on the desk in front of me.

"Well..." she winked. "You could always try..."

Or not, I added mentally before remembering the phone. I'm sure Fang enjoyed that...

"Sorry," I said to him, spinning away from Ella again. "Ella was being annoying."

"I'm sure she was," he chuckled again. Hey, that was the third time in twenty minutes! See, I'm a good influence (sometimes. Stop laughing, it hurts my feelings, which, yes, I do have).

"I better go," I said, my eyes finding the pile of books on my desk next to the... things Ella dumped on there. "Homework mountain to scale yet."

"Meet you at the top?"

"Sure."

"I'll probably get there first..."

"Yeah, right. So?"

"Coffee or tea?"

"Coffee, I'll be half asleep after all this crap."

We both laughed, then hung up at the same time. I could imagine him smiling, his eyes obscured by his hair (I'm going to cut it off at some point when sleeping. I'm not kidding).

So. I'm going to the dance with Fang. Actually, this is the first time I've ever been to any school dance, since I'm not the, uh, preppiest kid there (understatement of the century). It should be... interesting. Nah, it'll be cool, even funny with Fang there. We can laugh at all the sad people there actually to have a good night (*coughEllaandNudgecough*) without acting like idiots and accidentally-on-purpose spilling punch everywhere. I also have to tell Dylan that I'm going with Fang instead of him. Oh yeah, every girl's dream. _Not. _

Still, the dance of suckiness isn't the most important thing right now. Far from it, actually. What's important right now is rocking the Band Slam. Poor people won't know what's hit 'em.

**X X X**

"They're good," Sam muttered from where he was peeking out behind the velvety curtains blocking our view of the stage.

"Really good," Dylan added from his side.

I ran my fingers through my hair, then took a big gulp of water from my bottle. We were up next, after a hour and forty-five minute wait, and we still had a good twenty five minutes left before they announced us. Ig's outside chatting to Lily while me and the guys spend our time spying on the other acts. Typically, we were second-last. Not even freaking last, _second-last_. Sucky time slot much? Each band got thirty minutes to 'wow' the judges, of which there were three: one a former Miss Kentucky (ew), one a boy from a new boy band that sucked (double ew), and one an up-and-coming country star that I actually liked (no one'll ever compare to Rascal Flatts, though).

"Yeah, well..." I trailed off. How could they be so damn calm? I was freaking! Honestly? I felt like I wanted to throw up. Performing live, I can do. It's awesome, just gives me a complete rush of exaltation, exhilaration. But when our whole band's future rests on it? Not to mention the fact that all our parents are out there, plus Ella, Nudge, Angel, Gazzy and Fang (sporting a home-made Golden Silence banner Angel and Gazzy made with help from Fang)? Yeah, kind of scary. Just a little. Nothing I can't totally handle.

"Hey, guys!" Iggy strolled in, hand-in-hand with a very pretty amber-haired girl; Lily. She smiled at me sweetly, waving. We knew each other from English (the only class I didn't sit with Fang in), as we'd been sitting with one another since way back. Back then, I'd never thought she'd end up with the Pikachu Fanatic (he's actually wearing a Pikachu badge he imported from China. No joke). I guess it's cute, though.

"Lily, this is Max. She has multiple personalities, all of which are psychopathic," he introduced me, which was completely unnecessary, not to mention more than slightly hurtful. That last bit was sarcastic.

"We know each other, doofus," I rolled my eyes, smacking his stomach hard enough to make him double over before winking at Lily. "Hey, Lil. Just out of interest, Ig, how were you going to introduce Lily?"

"The prettiest girl I know," he straightened up and gave Lily a love-drunk smile. Eurgh. Lily looked up at him lovingly, flipping some strawberry hair from her face.

"Sucker," I grinned, winking again at Lily to show I was joking.

As we chatted about nothing in particular (mainly me sharing embarrassing stories from Iggy's past) and Sam and Dylan insulted the band for, again, no particular reason, the guys working backstage arrived, hauling Iggy's drums into place and helping the guys plug their guitars in. One of them handed me a stripy mike, a boy with blonde spiky hair I knew that Nudge had her eye on.

Lily left a few minutes before they told us to go on, giving all of us good-luck hugs.

"Sam, Dyl," I called them over from where they were listening to the judge's comments. Realising what we were about to do, they came straight over, both smiling.

It was our pre-show ritual, the one we did before every concert without fail: we stacked our fists together, then flung them into the air, grinning.

"You're up," the boy poked his head through with perfect time. The butterflies came back with a vengeance (who knew butterflies could be so evil? I'm so recruiting them for my army).

Sam and Dylan went on first, followed by Iggy. They received rapturous applause from fans we didn't know we did, which was already a huge relief: I'd been afraid of stone-cold silence. I took a deep breath: I can do this. I'm Max Martinez, after all. Charged from the applause, I walked out into the spotlit stage, bringing the mic to my lips. The field was completely packed; there had to be more than a thousand people here, most of which were cheering and clapping of us, and there was more than one banner for us out there. I could see Fang right at the front, Angel on his shoulders. He was smiling the widest I'd ever seen him, looking up at me, laughing at my incredulous expression. This was _amazing._

"Hey, guys! I'm Max, he's Iggy, he's Sam, he's Dylan," I introduced them, pointing at each of them as I said their names. "And we're Golden Silence."

**A/N: Sorry for the wait! -.- Way too much on right now, but only 3 weeks 'till the Summer. Honestly, I can't wait: for the sun, the relaxation, and of course, so I can write loads for you guys. ^-^ I hope this chapter sort of made up for the wait, I'll try to add another either tonight, or, more likely, tomorrow. I'd also like to add that I'm not trying to offend anyone with any comments in this story: it's true that I dislike artists like Lady Gaga and Miley Cyrus, but I'm not trying to poke fun at anyone who does [except my friend Sara, who I know reads this (;], it's just meant to be funny, and make your day a little bit brighter. **

**Okay, rant over. ^-^ **

**Review?**


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: ...Not JP. _Duh._**

**A/N: ^-^ Thank you guys for all the reviews, like I say in my replies, support really means a lot. I KNOW I SUCK FOR THIS BEING SO DAMNED LATE, school, life, you know? Crap like that. Plus, I'm an absolute failure with my internet life right now -.- Just keep being as patient as you are, please! ^-^ The songs in this chapter [in order] are:**

**Josey, by Hey Monday. **

**Past Praying For, by VersaEmerge [the lyrics aren't there, but it's still on their setlist, and VE rock ^-^].**

**Bring Me To Life, by Evanescence [ditto to Past Praying For. Though, if you don't know who Evanescence are, then, no offence or anything, but you're living under a rock. Amy Lee FTW]. **

**Weightless, by All Time Low [ditto. My fave ATL song ever? Hell yeah].**

**Brick by Boring Brick, by Paramore [ditto].**

**Fallen, by Death in the Park feat. Hayley Williams. **

**Music-heavy chapter, but didn't you expect it? ^-^ Enjoy!**

The reaction from the audience was amazing. Indescribable. They just started... screaming. And I mean, ouch, and all, but still... wow. I really am just that cool.

"Thanks, guys," I tried to quieten them whilst still being polite and all (good impressions. They can always be ruined later when they realise Iggy's in a stable relationship... with a Pokething). To my surprise, the crowd were immediately silent, apart from the occasional: '_I love you!'_ Heheh. See. I'm loved. Way more than Iggy. Take that, Pikachu freak. "Okay, this is a little song you might know... it's called Josey, and it's by Hey Monday."

I took a few steps back, and nodded at Sam. He started up a few power-chords, smiling when it was the perfect volume. Iggy started up on the drums, his loud beats resonating around the field while Dylan kept the tempo at the right speed, tapping his foot to the rhythm.

It sounded awesome, and the crowd seemed to agree, going even more insane than before (which is pretty damn insane, you know). And now I had to sing. God help me. Taking a deep breath, I looked straight at Fang and Angel, my eyes begging them to give me the strength I suddenly needed, and started to sing.

_The drinks are flowing just like the river_

_Then she keeps going_

_The whole night ends with a blur_

_She's got no limit she thinks she's so tough_

_Can't walk a straight line_

_The end of the night she's rough_

I leaned down a little, singing to the front row conspiratorially. The kids laughed, jumping along with me before I straightened up again, my voice silky-smooth.

_Her dress whispers reckless_

_That night starts now_

_And she slips on her necklace_

We leapt into the chorus, the guitar almost harmonising with my voice. Performing like this... felt pretty damn incredible.

_Josey don't you worry_

_It's just a phase you're going through_

_Some day you'll know just what to do_

_Josey it's alright_

_Slap the hand that just keeps pouring_

_It doesn't matter just do something_

_She's ready to roll tonight is different_

_She'll start it off slow_

_To keep herself in check_

_Oh no oh no it's two for one_

_She starts the show now_

_From this moment on she's done_

_Her dress whispers reckless_

_That night starts now_

_And she slips on her necklace_

I laughed out loud, jumping up and down at Sam's side, bringing my head up and down to the music just like our audience.

_Josey don't you worry_

_It's just a phase you're going through_

_Some day you'll know just what to do_

_Josey it's alright_

_Slap the hand that just keeps pouring_

_It doesn't matter just do something_

My voice was only just audible over the music, soft and sweet...

_The party is tonight_

_And she thinks they're playing her song_

_The party is tonight_

_And it's playing all night long_

...Before I absolutely belted out the final chorus, Dylan and Sam bouncing on the balls of their feet beside me, Iggy behind us smacking his drums with vigour.

_Josey don't you worry_

_It's just a phase you're going through_

_Some day you'll know just what to do_

_Josey it's alright_

_Slap the hand that just keeps pouring_

_It doesn't matter just do something_

We finished with our trademark flourish, all of us with grins splitting our faces'. Hell. That was freaking fun, let me tell you. If you ever get the chance to perform in front of a thousand odd people, with your future at stake? Go for it. No joke. The applause, screams and general approval from the crowd was deafening, all of them practically bursting their lungs to cheer for us.

My gaze flickered over to where the judges were sat, to the right of the stage. I'd been avoiding looking over at them, but hey, curiosity never killed the cat. Hang on. I think that's wrong... sod it. If I was a cat, then I'd be able to land my skateboard without looking like an elephant who's just sky-dived. All three of them were hunched over the desk, whispering to one another as they scribbled on paper, occasionally flicking us a glance.

"Our next song's called Past Praying For, by VersaEmerge," I winked as Sam started up his round of power-chords, Dylan picking along with him.

This time, starting to sing wasn't half as hard: the crowd was supporting me through and through, and as always I could feel my nervousness slipping away as the music filled parts of me I never knew were empty. Around me, all the guys completely let themselves go, just enjoying the music.

Have I already said that it felt amazing? Yeah, well, it did.

By the end of our set, we'd rocked through Bring Me To Life by Evanescence (with Sam shouting along. Let's just say he should be jealous of dying cats), Weightless by All Time Low (you should've seen the raving down there. All Time Low are just loved, okay? Everyone loves them. And if they say they don't, they're in denial. Fact) and topped it all off with Brick by Boring Brick by my personal favourite, Paramore (are brackets really needed here? No, no they're not, but that's beside the point).

"Thanks, guys," I grinned, breathing heavily after my, to say the least, energetic performance. Sam and Dylan were smiling like idiots, waving randomly to random people standing around randomly (I like the word random. Don't judge me), and I could only imagine what Iggy was doing behind. Actually, scratch that, I really, really don't even want to think about what Ig's probably doing. Next time, we really should give him a talk on 'appropriate' on-stage behaviour.

"It was awesome playing for you all," Sam chipped in, speaking into the microphone he hadn't abandoned after he tried to raise the dead in Bring Me To Life (hahaha... that's seriously ironic. No pun intended, I swear... it just slipped out).

"We'll see you guys around!" I gave a final wave, letting the various catcalls and whistles brush right past me (some of them were rather inventive, actually. I hope Ig didn't hear them: he might get ideas, and we don't want that. At all. Ig's ideas kill. I'm serious, the kid has a serious bomb disorder).

As we strolled off, I couldn't help looking over my shoulder to look at the judges again. I knew I shouldn't, but that just made me want to that much more. It's natural, okay? Leave me alone. Anyway, the little Barbie doll was just sat there, barely clapping, hardly concealing her disapproval. I was extremely tempted to flip her the bird, but I refrained, which is probably a good thing. Hell, we'd just given it her all, but hey, of course it's not good enough for her. We could've worn lycra costumes and flipped around the stage like freaking acrobats, and it still wouldn't have been good enough. Wait. No, no we couldn't have. The day I see Iggy in anything vaguely tight-fitting will be the day I die.

No joke.

See, it's so true it even deserved a whole new paragraph. Um, yeah, so anyway... the country guy I actually liked was smiling, applauding us heartily, while the boy from that new crappy boy band was nodding approvingly, clapping a little, but nothing major, you know? Yeah.

All in all... I think they kinda liked us. Except Miss 'I can't hear you, my head's stuck in my arse' who's just too good for any of us local bands. You know, now that I think about it, she kind of reminds me of Lissa. Yup, that was definitely needed in this little musing session, which I'm officially ending because I actually referred to it as a musing session and... now I'm rambling.

As soon as we pushed through the curtains, Iggy threw himself onto one of the little plush armchairs (I know, how glamorous? Edward Cullen should be jealous). Sam flopped down in a slightly more controlled fashion and Dylan just went back to spying on the next band. Clever me, however, heard footsteps echoing away from us.

"Hm," Iggy's eyes were closed as he talked. I wonder if I could steal his Pikachu badge ('I need the support to know she's always with me!')...? "I think we've been spied on." Typical. Has to read my mind, doesn't he? Crap, that means he knows about the badge mission... oh well. I'll have to reschedule. Fang'll love this.

"By who?" Sam lifted his head for a few seconds before collapsing again.

"People," Iggy replied, his eyes opening. Oh, how prophetic.

"People who?" Dylan asked, confused. Oh dear God. Why me?

"Band people..." Houston, I think we've found the problem.

"Another band?" Congratulations, Sam. You have more than one brain cell, which is more than I can say for Iggy. And Dylan. Put together.

"No shit Sherlock," I finally jumped in, rolling my eyes. "The same one that just went on."

"If you're not mistaken," Dylan turned to look at me with deep, teasing eyes.

"When am I ever mistaken?" I grinned cockily.

"Touché," he winked before turning back to the stage. Iggy and Sam promptly starting arguing, this time about some game revolving around fish (I'm sorry, guys, but COD is a fish. Not a game. Get over it). After checking they weren't going to rip each others' throats out (it took like fifteen minutes. Believe me), I moved to Dylan's side, leaning past him slightly to look out past him. I could feel heat radiating from him before he took a nervous step back. Glancing back, I saw his cheeks were blazing scarlet. See, now I feel all bad about the dance thing.

He'd been really sweet and all understanding when I'd told him that I was planning to go with Fang. You know, just letting it go. It's how you'd _want _it to go, all perfectly smooth, nothing out of place. No anger, no raised voices (or fists, in my case... Still not violent, though), just... calm.

It just made it that much freaking worse. Alright, I can deal with anger, annoyance, all that stuff, but turn a sad face on me, and I'll struggle. Dylan was just... Dylan. Calm, controlled... okay, no, he was flustered (he always seems to be, around me, these days), but he just accepted it. Even said he was happy for me and Fang before I set the record straight, then he just laughed. He gave me one last sweet smile before leaving for home.

I felt so freaking horrible. Couldn't he have just, you know, hurled a couple of glasses at my head or something? Oh, no. He just had to be so perfect.

Wow, I'm messed up. Complaining about a guy being too perfect... well, that's me. Typical.

Anyway, out on the stage was a pretty red-headed girl, flanked by two guys on electric guitar, a boy on bass, and another back on the drums. They were kinda like us, with the whole female fronting thing, except they had another drummer. And none of us looked anything like any of the band.

"We're gonna slow things down a little for our last song," the girl announced, smiling and winking at the crowd. "We've been Angel Range, thanks for supporting us!" Me and Dylan exchanged a look before turning back to the stage, eyebrows raised, watching as one of the guitarists with blonde floppy hair exchanged his electric guitar for a nicely polished acoustic. The other guitarist and the drummer both waved goodbye to rapturous applause as they pushed through the curtains... right next to us.

Well. We just got owned.

They just stood there for a moment like lemons, looking at us, who were looking right back at them like... oranges. Oranges are cooler than lemons, okay? Fact.

"Hi," I eventually said lamely.

"Hi," the guitarist repeated, looking a little confused (quite like Dylan, actually). There was an awkward silence. Damn, I hate awkward silences. Actually, I'm really bad in them, I just start rambling off about everything and anything. It's awful. Seriously.

"They were spying on you," Ig said helpfully, before I could open my mouth and let a whole a stream of embarrassing things gushing out. I sent him an exasperated look over my shoulder. He's so dead later. Not quite sure when, but he'll stop breathing at some point. At my hand. Wow, that sounded cool.

"Sorry," Dylan smiled apologetically, ever the diplomatic one. If I keep my big mouth shut, we might actually get through this, without an argument...

"Yeah, well, you were spying on us too," I shrugged. I just had to go there, didn't I? Typical. Just have to make myself seem like an arrogant, cocky little shit. Which, you know, I kind of am sometimes, but there's no need for them to know that yet. I like to keep my alter-egos to myself until they know my main one, so to speak.

To my surprise, both of them burst out laughing. Hmm. Seems they have a mental disorder of some sort... well, they'll get along well with Iggy, then.

"No worries," the guitarist said, grinning.

"Yeah," the drummer added. "Gotta check out the competition, huh? Anyhow, I'm Tom, drummer supremo!" He winked to show he was only joking... I hope. Really hope. Pikachu might get mad on Iggy's behalf, and if that happens... well, let's just say sparks fly. Get it? Oh God, I amuse myself sometimes.

"Matt," the guitarist gave us both a friendly smile, casting a glance at the collapsed, barely-recognisable figures on the arm-chairs. They looked like deformed monsters. Especially in Iggy's case. I'm kidding (sort of).

"I'm Dylan," Dyl said, extending his hand for the other two to take. Aw. He's such a gentleman. How sweet.

"I'm-"

"Max needs introducing?" Ig's head snapped up, and he jumped up, zooming over at a ridiculous speed. "This is Max, she has multiple psycho_pathetic_ tendencies, absolutely no common sense, can burn cereal, and has anger problems."

"And believes she'll rule the world," Sam chipped in lazily, now sitting up with his feet propped up on Iggy's abandoned chair.

Well. Aren't I loved? You'd think, after all this time, they'd realise that most of that I take as a compliment. But still. They must pay.

Slowly, I turned around, ignoring Tom, Matt, and Dyl's snickers. Smiling sweetly, I elbowed Ig in the ribs. Pretty damn hard. He groaned and reached down to stroke them tenderly.

"Are you sorry?" I leaned up onto my tiptoes so we were approximately the same height (I'm not short! I'm just vertically challenged. There's a difference. Except when Iggy's concerned, since he's both stupid and mentally challenged) and I could look into his eyes properly.

"Very much so," he straightened up so he could tower over me, smirking. I rolled my eyes before turning to Sam, who was watching us amusedly.

"You should shut it or it'll be you next," I said threateningly, knowing it was a completely empty threat.

"Aye aye, Cap'n Max," he saluted me, grinning, and I laughed despite myself. Stupid guys. Always know how to get to me. Damn them. Love them really, though. I'd never admit it, but I do.

"Hey, they're starting," Matt called to Tom, who was grabbing a can of 7UP from the various vending machines scattered around. Naturally, in the end, all six of us ended up crowded round the curtains, even Sam (Iggy dragged him up with promises not to try and set him up with... um... Piplup? I don't know, I'm not a Pokeperson. Get it? Hahahaha... never mind).

On-stage, they'd both sat down, on little stools facing each other. The boy started playing a cheerful acoustic tune, smiling at the girl, who was nodding her head in time to the music gently.

[_Italics = boy, __**bold and italics = both**_]

_Ooohh, oooh, oohh_

love letters written in lipstick  
the case is closed and I'm covered in your fingerprints  
lay right here with me tonight  
the sun is coming up  
I've got a perfect view  
I've got the day planned out  
even thought it through

The boy's voice was surprisingly soft and gentle, though it had a rough edge. It was lovely to listen to, though. I wonder why he doesn't sing more often?

_oh baby teach my something I never knew  
like a diamond in the roof I'd shine for you  
_

The girl took a deep breath before joining in, her voice strong against his as they melted into one, the harmonising voices bringing tears already to the audience's eyes'.

_**Stop. chase here into the dark.  
With such grace, it's never been this hard.  
I've never fallen, I've never fallen faster.  
Stop. chase here into the dark.  
With such grace, it's never been this hard.  
I've never fallen, I've never fallen faster.  
Ooohh, oooh, ooohh**_

Let's hit the town parade every avenue  
Let's burn it down, forget all we ever knew  
Free from these city lights  
Undercover, out of sight and out of mind  
Where I can give you all my time  
Oh baby teach me something in ever knew  
Like a diamond in the roof I'd shine for you  


Their eyes met as she sang again, and the intensity their gazes bore was... insane. Wow. If they weren't in love, then I was Barack Obama. Which, before you make some sarcastic joke, I'm really not.

_**Stop. chase here into the dark.  
With such grace, it's never been this hard.  
I've never fallen, I've never fallen faster.  
Stop. chase here into the dark.  
With such grace, it's never been this hard.  
I've never fallen, I've never fallen faster.  
****Ooohh, oooh, ooohh**_

Stop. chase here into the dark.  
With such grace, it's never been this hard.  
I've never fallen, I've never fallen faster.  
Stop. chase here into the dark.  
With such grace, it's never been this hard.  
I've never fallen, I've never fallen faster.  
Ooohh, oooh, ooohh 

They finished strongly, their eyes lingering on one another before they stood and bowed to the mountainous applause, which, if I had to be completely honest, they completely deserved.

"Liam and Jamie," Matt smiled, clapping quietly. "Resident love-birds."

"Wouldn't guess it, though," Tom winked, applauding vigorously and almost smacking Ig in the face (well, someone has to). "It's hard to get Jame to even hold hands with him when we're around." Matt gave him a look.

"He means that Jamie isn't exactly one to flaunt her relationship," he explained more politely, slipping Tom a quick elbow in the stomach. Hmm. Jamie sounds cool, not to mention she has a freaking killer voice. Pretty, too. I'm not sure whether to like her for sounding awesome, or hate her for being better than me at just about everything. Stay tuned folks. Coming soon.

"Hey guys!" Jamie came bounding backstage, Liam traipsing behind her. "We did okay, huh?" She continued to babble away hyperly to Matt and Tom while Liam came up behind her, slinging an arm around her shoulders. Despite her band's raised eyebrows, she let him, and even offered a small, happy smile.

"Jamie, shut up for like a second," Tom rolled his eyes, and Jamie shoved his shoulder a little, nothing major.

"This is Max," Matt jumped in, gesturing towards me. "And Dylan, Iggy, and Sam," he continued, pointing to each of them in turn. "They're Golden Silence."

"No freaking duh," Tom muttered under his breath. "What? We watched them, dumbass." All us on-lookers laughed as they began to wrestle playfully, Jamie rolling her eyes.

"Awesome to meet you," she grinned at me once they'd moved out of sight. "You guys were incredible! You so have to show me how to sing that chorus of Brick by Boring Brick, I can never get high enough."

"Sure," I smiled a little. "You were good, by the way. I'll show you Paramore if you show me how you did that acoustic cover. It was... okay."

Sam, Ig and Dyl burst out laughing at the last part, both Sam and Ig resting their arms on my shoulders (damn their tall-ness!).

"Okay in Max world is like out of this world in normal world," Iggy explained to a confused Jamie. "She lives in her own little world, you see."

"Hey, don't knock it!" I protested. "It's okay, see, everyone knows me there." The guys rolled their eyes, and Jamie laughed.

Tom and Matt reappeared, both of them rubbing various parts of their arms and necks, grumbling. They flopped down on the seats Ig and Sam were in earlier, and we soon joined them, my burst of energy beginning to fade.

And that was how we met both our main rivals, and good friends, Angel Range.

**A/N: Again, so so so sorry about the lateness, I'll try to make sure the next one is nowhere near this later. Also my apologies for not replying to reviews, if I don't get round to it tomorrow or whatever, I'll definitely reply any I might get for this chapter [the next chapter will come sooner if I get feedback... wink wink]. Anyhow, hope you liked it, was a bit of a longer one I think? Next chapter, results, and the dance! You might hate me for the next chapter, actually, but hey. **

**Review?**


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer: Not JP.**

**A/N: ^-^ Thank you so much for all the reviews, over 90? Damn, insane. If we can reach 100, I will be seriously over the moon [personal goal of mine]. Anyway, enjoy!**

"I don't get it," Jamie was saying loudly (as always). "You know, why only one band should win, out of all of us..."

"Yeah," Liam continued. He's alright, Liam, for a guy, surprisingly sensitive, and soft-spoken. Completely unlike Ig and Sam in every way, but him and Dylan are seriously similar. "We're all awesome."

"You're modest," Jamie laughed, elbowing him a little in the chest. He smiled at her, a sweet smile she returned when she thought no one was laughing. Aww. Sweet. Insert mushy loved-up adjective here. And here. And here. And... I think you got it.

"Not as modest as the amazing me," Ig grinned from beside me. Me, Jamie, Liam and him were all slouched on one of the cracked-leather sofas, while Dylan, Sam, Tom and Matt went off to grab drinks and pizza for all of us. Oh, the joys of slaves... I mean, boy friends. Separate words, before you go down that thinking route.

"Right," I rolled my eyes at him sarcastically. Can you roll your eyes sarcastically? If you can, I'm a master at it.

"Right," Ig repeated, not so sarcastically. Heaven help us, he really does think he's cool. Well, I wouldn't want to, you know, crush his dreams...

"Ig, you'll never be cool, get over it."

"Pikachu thinks I'm cool."

"Pikachu's not real."

"How... how dare you!" he turned away from me, folding his arms. I shoved him off of the sofa, and he landed with a satisfying smack on the floor to the music of me, Jamie and Liam cracking up laughing.

In the next twenty or so minutes after the guys returned (with cherry Lucozade for me. Idiots. You'd think they'd have learned by now just how hyper I get on sugar. Let's just say I once prank-called Ella. Pretending I was drunk. It went down _really _well...), we learned that Jamie and Liam had been together for almost six months; Tom once ran down the street in only his boxers for a dare... in broad daylight and Matt was just as big a Pokemon freak as Ig (except, thank God, he draws the line at actually having a relationship with them. Ig's working on it, apparently).

Unfortunately, Fang, Lily and our families weren't allowed backstage, and we weren't permitted to leave until the results had been announced, according to the snotty bodyguard (there to protect Miss If-You're-Not-Plastic-You-Suck and the other judges), so we didn't get to see any of them. We had to make do with the Pokemon fanatic, the streaker, the overly-loud one and the... well, the normal one. Just kidding. Angel Range kind of rule. Not as much as us though (that's impossible. I'm excluding Iggy).

"Hey, guys?" the blonde kid from earlier poked his head around the side again, headphones clamped around his head. I was sorely tempted to yell 'MY FRIEND FANCIES YOU', but then I realised he'd think it was Jamie, or, even worse, Ig. Meh. I'll wait 'till school: then I get to see the full brilliance of Nudge's face transforming into a red traffic light.

"Yeah?" we called as one, then giggled, all of us kind of high on fizz.

"You're due back on in..." he flicked a glance at his watch. "Well, now. Good luck!"

Well, thanks for the warning, dude. We all scrambled up, Jamie (okay, she's a girl. She's allowed) and Ig (...this is worrying) both smoothing down their hair. I bounced up and down on the balls of my black Converse-encased feet, deliberately messing up my hair (no, it's not opposite day, I'm just cooler than Ig and Jamie). To my surprise, Jamie pulled me in for a quick hug.

"Good luck!" she grinned, giving us all the peace sign. The rest of Angel Range smiled and nodded, before they all linked arms and sauntered out onto the stage.

"This is it," Dylan said, looking at the curtains slightly bemusedly.

"Hate to break it to you, Dyl, but you're not MJ," I winked at him, trying to lighten the mood.

"Hate to break it to you, Max, but he's dead," Iggy imitated, grinning irritatingly. Saving me from the effort, Sam smacked him round the head, winking at me.

We all looked at each other for a few moments, all of us realising just how much we wanted this. We'd rehearsed like hell for months, played everywhere and anywhere (for free, I might add), and after all that... yeah, we wanted it.

I nodded, and Ig and Sam took both my hands, Dylan taking Sam's free hand. For once, I didn't shake them off, or tease them about being gay (I could do that later). It's a serious situation, okay? Feel the tension, yo! ...No, I really don't know where that yo came from. It's because I'm cool? Yeah, let's go with that.

Anyhow, once you're doing getting over my coolness (or not), we strode onto this stage like we were an army of four preparing to assassinate Pikachu (I wish. I really do), and this huge bubble of applause and screams bursts, sending my ears reeling from the volume. Wow. How awesome are we? And so modest, too.

Dyl, ever the level-headed one, pulled us to a stop next to Angel Range, who were all messing about, waving, grinning, laughing. Jamie gave me a hugely obvious wave, which I responded to just as enthusiastically, both of us laughing at the cheers we got just for being friends. See? We _are _awesome. The butterflies were back, though. I mean, like, seriously back. With a vengeance. I think they're trying to rip out of my stomach, or something. Maybe they're having a disco. Don't tell Ig, he'll want to join in, and if anything's going to stop us from winning (besides the other bands, obviously), it's Ig's 'dancing'. He calls it dancing, we call it summoning the dead.

"Hey, all!" the plastic judge sashayed onto the stage, one hand on her hip in typical slag fashion. She really does remind me of Lissa, you know. Like, seriously so. "It's that time! Who wants to know the winner?" Her accents really annoying, too. It's like this weird, high-pitched, clearly fake British accent. Like being British makes her cool **[A/N: Which it does. British people FTW! Yeah, I'm from the UK]**. And, you know, if she wasn't her, it would make her cool, but she is her, so it doesn't. Yeah, that made sense. Honest.

The audience didn't seem to mind, though, as they screamed, jumping up and down. My eyes automatically found Fang, who was trying to protect Angel and Gazzy from being shoved around too much, seeing as they were right at the front. Aww. He's gone into over-protective brother mode. Angel's trying to push him away, glaring at him... oh wait, now she's hugging him. I swear, that girl's strange. In the nicest possible way, of course.

"Well, you don't have to wait any longer!" the girl continued, her smile so big it was practically tearing her face apart. "Okay, we're gonna go in reverse order, which means that I'll say third place first, 'kay?" I half-tuned her out as she babbled on, still watching Fang. He was holding Angel up in his arms, now, but his eyes were fixated on the plastic girl. Cue eye-roll, and elbow in the stomach.

"In third place..." Barbie shouted, and suddenly everyone was silent, Sam and Ig's hands turning into vices around my hands. "...Fateless!"

I let out a deep breath I didn't know I was holding, joining the audience in clapping as a lanky, blonde-haired boy came forward to shake Barbie's hand gingerly (gotta give him credit for _not _being like every other boy out there, folks), flanked by several other boys, each one clutching either a guitar or drum sticks. As they turned to go off, the blonde's eyes caught mine, and he winked at me, pretending to bow. Well, can't say I don't appreciate the fact that everyone is finally starting to recognise their world leader, but what the hell was that about?

"In second place..." the vices returned, and I could feel myself practically choking on butterflies. On one hand, I wanted to come second, just to place, 'cos second? It'd be amazing. But at the same time, first would be... incredible. So, you know... okay, these melodramatic pauses are really beginning to- "Golden Silence!"

The breath all came out of me in one great big gush, and I felt myself grin, and punch the air, _accidentally _glancing the side of Ig's face. He tried to shoot me a glare, but his face was all taken up by the smile, and we all ended up hugging. Jamie was going insane as she clapped, all the others laughing at her. The audience lent its support, and we all waved as we made our way over to Barbie.

"Congratulations!" she squealed in her stupid voice, reaching out to take my hand. I have never wanted to punch someone as much as I do right now. Not including the time Ig called me at four in the morning to remind me we had math tomorrow (I was about to march over and smack him one, but Mum stopped me. Unfortunately). Her hand was all sticky and sweaty. Eww.

Once I finally pulled free of her sardine hand, and we were walking again (it felt like we were walkin' on sunshine. Yes, I feel the need to relate everything to music. Everything), this time _off _the stage, I caught Jamie's eye again, and pointed at her, then at Barbie. She shook her head, but she was hopeful; I know these things.

In the confines of backstage, we just stared at each other for a few moments. We were all feeling the same things: happiness (hey, we'd come second! Which is, you know, good); tiredness (it really does take a lot out of you, standing on a stage... but it was more feeling all that our rehearsals had taken out of us); surprise (so many people had come to freaking support us! How awesome?) and... a sinking heart. It's not that I'm bitter, or anything, 'cos I'm not. At all. But we'd wanted to come first _so _badly, that... well, we were kind of disappointed. Much more in ourselves, than anything else. That's all way behind the feelings of happiness etc. though.

"And in first place, winning a record deal, the ticket to real fame..." We all knew who it was, of course, so it came as no surprise when she screamed: "Angel Range!"

We clapped and clapped, and I was very, very tempted to poke my head out and say 'Told you so!' but I didn't think it would go down so well with Barbie, so I refrained (for once).

"Should we wait for them?" Sam mused aloud.

"Hell yeah!" I answered, smiling. "You think I'm ready to be attacked yet?"

"What?" Dylan was confused (as always).

"By the Queen of Fashion and her minion," I winked. "Ella and Nudge, idiot."

"Oh. I get it now."

"Good, it'd be a real problem if you didn't."

He nodded. What are we coming to when people don't get sarcasm? I mean, seriously.

"So, second," Sam finally said, after a few minutes of silence, listening to them interview Angel Range.

"Yup," I said, showing just how amazingly intelligent I am.

"They'll just be _begging _for a piece of me, then," Iggy grinned, obviously deep in fantasies.

"You wish," Sam rolled his eyes. Damn, that was my line.

"Correction: _you _wish."

"I have a girlfriend," Sam reminded him. "As do you."

"Two," Dylan corrected, holding up two fingers.

"And?" Iggy winked.

"So, girls aren't toys, idiot," I finally spoke up, slapping him hard enough for him to grimace. Well, he deserved it. Seriously. He swore he was over using girls like that.

"Max?" Fang chose that moment to appear at the curtains, hand-in-hand with Angel and Gazzy, closely followed by Nudge and Ella. "What'd he do?"

"Oh, charming," Iggy shifted into Drama Queen. "Kick the guy when he's down. Where's Lily?"

"Dance," Fang shrugged, eloquent as ever. "You were insane," he nodded at me, a full smile threatening.

"It's her hobby," Sam winked, grinning.

"Shut up," I instructed him, before turning to Fang. "Um, thanks. We came second. Second!" Oh dear God. Listen to me, I could be a bloody Disney extra. "I mean, yeah, it was pretty fre—pretty, cool," I remembered the little ears around at the last moment. "Hey Ange!" I leaned down, inviting her to run into my arms. Don't try it, unless you're seven and irresistibly cute.

"You were so good, Max," she whispered into my ear. "You should've won!" Aww. And again: aww.

"Thanks, sweetie," I smiled, releasing her to draw back up to my full height (though, according to Iggy, there's not much difference. He was hit). Glancing around, I saw the other guys were amusing Gazzy with stupid ideas (Ig keeps trying to get Gaz to help him to build bombs. Not good), while Fang, Nudge and Ella were just watching me and Ange.

"She's about to blow," Ella warned, once she noticed me looking at her, pointing at Nudge. Oh God. Heaven help me.

"OHMIGOD Max you were so good so much better than anyone else you should totally have won like you were so amazing and so good and so awesome I can't believe you lost you were better than apple pie with custard mmm apple pie and custard I like apple pie and custard not as much as you though the MacDonald's one is the best let's stop there on the way home wait no we have to go to the dance and get ready I can't wait!"

Silence, silence, silence. Crickets chirping. Well, not really, but there's always crickets in silences, so imagine them for effect, 'kay? Good.

"Thanks, Nudge?" Dylan finally broke the silence, adorably confused (of course).

"Was that an insult?" Iggy thought aloud.

"I don't _think _so..." Sam glanced at me.

"Of course not, you idiots," I rolled my eyes. "...I don't think so, at least."

"No!" Nudge confirmed, frowning. "But we need to go!"

"Who needs to go?" Matt pushed the curtains back, holding them so Jamie and the others could crawl through.

"Me," Tom made straight for the toilets. "I've been dying for a pee."

"Thanks for that information, mate," Matt rolled his eyes at us, his eyes taking all the new arrivals.

"You have to go?" Jamie asked. "No, don't go, we only just got out here!" With that, she started jumping up and down.

"Erm, Jamie?" Sam watched her, bemused. "What _are _you doing?"

"Working out my happiness so I don't scream!"

"...Because that's completely normal," Matt muttered under his breath. "For Jamie, at least."

"Wow, this is exhausting," Jamie stopped, only to stumble dizzily. Liam reached forward to hold her up, rolling his eyes. His smile said it all, though. "I can't believe we won!"

"Don't jump again," Liam laughed, his arms tightening.

"I won't if you let go of me," she smiled up at him. His arms loosened momentarily, and Jamie pulled away, though she winked at him. "I'm Jamie, by the way."

"Fang," the man himself nodded, and I turned to Iggy.

"What? No introduction for him?"

"He doesn't bully me," Ig shrugged. "Or skive math."

"If you mention math one more time, I will be forced to exterminate you."

"No," Fang butted in. "Because I claim Daleks."

"Damn you!"

"What did you say Max?" Angel looked up at me, all big, innocent blue eyes.

"I said darn Fang, Ange," I ruffled her curls. "This is Jamie, Liam, and Matt." They each waved at her, smiling.

"Hi," she said, not shy in the slightest. "I'm Angel, and this is my stupid brother, Gazzy." I snorted loudly, Jamie burst out laughing, and the others sort of tittered like the tits they are. Well, Iggy at least.

"Nice to meet you," Matt reached down and shook Angel's hand like they were in a business meeting or something.

"Hey," Tom re-emerged to the sound of a flushing toilet. "Man, that hit the spot."

"Again, thanks for the info mate," Matt rolled his eyes.

"You know you love me," Tom winked. "Hey, Jame, did you invite them tonight?"

"Tonight?" Jamie looked confused momentarily before brightening again. "Oh, yeah! Huge party at my place. Want to come? We could jam, all of us."

"No one says jam any more Jame," Liam smiled.

"Shut it, serial killer."

"Serial killer?" Iggy raised an eyebrow. Probably worried about his secret reputation.

"He eats cereal, doesn't he?"

"Hey, you can join Max's club!" The sad thing was Ig actually sounded excited. "She burns cereal!"

I shot him a look, ignoring the snickers circling.

"I hope you're laughing at Ig's stupidity," I rounded on Dylan.

"Absolutely," he sent me one of his special smiles that always bring the butterflies back. Oh my God. I think I've finally figured it out. It's _Dylan_! The master of the butterflies! So if I stay away from him, he shouldn't be able to summon those evil little enhanced worms, right? Right.

"So can you come?" Jamie asked.

"That'd be-"

"Sorry," Ella cut in.

"It's the dance and she's going with Fang!" Nudge finished, grinning.

"Really?" No, Jamie. Please don't get interested. "How long've you two been going out?"

"_As friends_," I amended Nudge's statement, rolling my eyes.

"Oh," Jamie giggled a little.

"We really should be going," Ellla smiled apologetically. "_Right, Max?"_

"Oh no," I smiled just as sweetly. "We can stick around, it's like an hour 'till the dance anyway, and I want to talk to the country judge about music... stuff."

Wow, convincing, Max. Really good excuse to keep away from the fashionistas.

"We're going." Ella announced as Nudge rolled her eyes. "Max will add you all on Facebook," she told Angel Range, "if she ever goes on, which she doesn't, in which case I will hack her and add you for her. And she'll see you guys later."

With that, she and Nudge took me by the arms and dragged me away.

"Hang on," I said, once I was walking of my own free will home (God help me). "Did you say something about hacking my Facebook? Wait... those Justin Bieber statuses! They were you!"

A few months ago, I'd had an avalanche of Facebook statuses, all declaring my 'undying love' for Justin Bieber. Because, you know, I'm his Baby, and I'm no longer a Lonely Girl now I've found my one true love. Yeah. This coming from the girl who owns a Metallica t-shirt faded from use. I just love me some Justin Bieber. Correction, I love Justin _Beaver. _

"Well," Ella grinned evilly. "I have to get my revenge somehow, don't I?"

Did I mention that I hate my little sister? ...Nah. She gets her evil traits from the (world) master: me.

**A/N: ^-^ Sorry it's a little late, but honestly, a good majority of my chapters are over 3000 words, and none of them are less than 2500 so I don't think it's a _huge _thing. If they were like 1000 words, then yeah, but you know, cut me some slack! Hope you liked it, this chapter was kind of hard to write. OH, and if you don't know who Justin Beaver is, type Rabies – Baby Parody into YouTube ^-^ 'Tis worth it. **

**I'm 8 reviews off 100 as I post this, and 100 reviews has always been my main goal, when I started writing here, and to reach it would be huge for me (no matter how small and insignificant a number it might seem to some of you big-shots out there), so please... **

**review?**


	9. Chapter 9

**Disclaimer: I'm too cool to be JP... okay, maybe it's the other way around, but you know, it's my story, and in my story, I'm cooler than JP. Oh yeah. Bow to my coolness. **

**A/N: ...I had a strange moment above, sorry. Wow. 109 reviews. Thank you, thank you, thank you. ^-^ Loveroffang [sod your capitals], you got a bit to make up there, [not so] helpful friend. Just want to mention the anonymous reviewers: **

**xXalltimelovexX [I loveth you. Muchly]; Musikrules [Love you]; Lizzy [you confuse me slightly, but I love you for it?] and Justin Iggy's imaginary son [nice to know names are so amusing these days. I'm kidding, who doesn't read St. Fang of Boredom?].**

**Just wanted to give them some recognition, since most of them review all the chapters, and I've never been able to reply. And you know, the fact that Justin [from St. Fang of Boredom's fics] reviewed just amused me. A lot. I need to get a life. **

**ANYWAY. Enjoyeth!**

"Ow, Nudge, that _hurts_!"

"So you can almost smash your head skateboarding but you can't stand hair curlers?"

"Yup."

"You're such a freak, sis."

"I take the first part as a compliment, the second as an insult... OW! Since when did you have muscles?"

"Since I figured that you needed to start getting hit."

"For what?"

"For being you. Now, get in this..."

"I don't want to."

"You _will_ get in the dress, Max."

"I don't want to!"

"I don't care!"

"Get in the dress, Max! It'll make you look pretty!"

"Nudge, this is a sister-to-sister confrontation, I'm sorry."

"Ignore her, she's just annoyed 'cos she's losing and _putting the dress on!"_

"Oh, for crying out loud..."

**[ X X X ]**

After many further arguments (and I just about lost the will to live), I stood in front of a full-length mirror, studying myself sceptically. Well, not actually studying myself, 'cos a test on me? ...Ew, I just imagined that. It'd go a little like this, I think:

**Q: What are Max's hobbies?**

_A: Being violent, eating, rocking out, eating, hitting Iggy, eating, hitting Iggy harder, eating, throwing things at Iggy/Sam/Ella, eating Pokemon, murdering Pikachu, eating, planning assassination, and... eating. _

**Q: What are Max's distinguishing features?**

_A: Food in her mouth when she talks, always wearing some old ratty Converse and if a male's in pain, you know she's with him._

**Q: What would Max like to be when she's older?**

_A: [If it's Ella answering] A man. I mean, world leader, but that ain't gonna happen no more with Fangalicious around, is it now?_

...Actually, let's just pretend I never even imagined that. Back to the mirror thing. Wouldn't it be seriously awesome if like your reflection could just sort of step out of the mirror? You could just, like, spend all day arguing with it. Or, if you're sad like Ig, admiring it, just hanging with it... wow, I need to get a life.

So, the reflection that was in the mirror. Of me. Honestly? I wanted to say I hated it. Like, a lot. And, yeah, I'm uncomfortable in this cotton... _thing_, but... I guess it could be worse. For once, Ella and Nudge hadn't gone too far over the top, instead opting for a soft, blue, one-hundred percent cotton, short-sleeved dress that sort of floated around my knees, cinching in at the waist. No accessories (I'd really put my foot down on that one. Especially seeing that they wanted me to wear fifty-odd bracelets, each with a million beads I _knew _I'd end up breaking), except the lone string one Ig had got me a few years ago I never, ever took off. Except, you know, in the bath, but that doesn't count. And the shower. And swimming. And... oh, you know what I mean. My feet were bare for the moment, as they'd just tortured me into a pedi-mani-something-or-other. My hair was all curly, a soft sort of bush around my head... that probably wasn't the best description I could've given. Yup. Bush-hair Max. They'd – thankfully – left my face bare, since apparently I was red enough already. Is that an insult? I don't even know.

And you know what I was thinking? Thank God I don't have stumpy legs.

"Max, you look gorgeous," breathed the she-devil from my side. And I wonder how we're related.

"You look like a girl!" the devil's minion squealed from my other side.

"As opposed to what?" I turned to Nudge, eyebrows raised.

"...Ella, help?" Nudge blushed, giggling.

"As opposed to your normal self," Ella winked, craning her neck to check her other ear-ring was the perfect ninety-degree angle. Sad person.

"I think that's an insult, therefore I will mess up your hair," I spoke in an overly-formal tone, standing perfectly still. Ella glanced at me, her intricately braided bun bobbing behind her. She'd spent hours doing it, all patience and fiddly fingers, until all her hair, save for two gently curling strands framing her face, was pulled back in a tight princess-like bun, plaits circling it. She looked a bit like a ballerina, what with her hair and leotard-esque dress (a black sort of lycra torso, with a big white skirt). Actually, she looked beautiful, but I wasn't about to concede that.

"You wouldn't _dare_."

"Is that a bet, sister dear?"

"...Nah, it's okay," Ella quickly back-tracked. "The boys'll all be here in five minutes, anyway, you need to get your shoes on, Max."

"I'll get them!" Nudge skipped to the bed, ever Miss Optimistic. She even looked it tonight, her dress a bright sunny yellow, her hair silky-smooth with a single white bow. How come they only took forty minutes on each other, and almost two hours for me? I mean, seriously.

"Please don't," I called out.

"Too late," she grinned.

"Ha," Ella said childishly, still messing about with her hair in the mirror.

"Oh, shut up," I rolled my eyes at her.

"Hey, Ella?" Nudge called out a few moments later. "I can't find them anywhere! Where did you put them? You said they were here!"

"That was entirely two sentences too long, Nudge," I winked.

"Max," Ella chided, rolling her eyes as she moved to help Motormouth.

There was the sound of plastic bags rustling, and I wondered how many hours they'd spent in Topshop (don't ask me how I know the name) shifting through dresses. They have no life outside of clothes. It's quite sad, really.

"I told you they're not here!" said Nudge a few minutes later.

Oh dear. Crisis alert. Someone alert the police: Max Martinez's disgustingly high-heeled shoes have gone missing. Front page head-liner much? Agreed.

"_Please _tell me you ordered them," Ella sighed, clearly not seeing the highly amused smirk plastered on my face. Okay, it might have been just a _little _bit victorious too, but you know, details, details.

"I thought you were ordering them?"

"You said you were!"

"Well," Nudge folded her arms. "I'm sure you were meant to, because you said I'd just get distracted by all the shiny things!"

"Fair point," I piped up.

"Shut up, Max," Ella glared at me before turning back to Nudge. "So neither of us ordered them, then?"

"Well no because we both thought the other was going to and in the end neither of us did!" Nudge has a real talent for summing one thing up in a ridiculously long, punctuation-deprived sentence. "And—mmf."

"Ew," I pulled my hand away from her mouth. "Hand-licker." Nudge just gave me one of her happy little nods before turning back to the distraught she-devil.

"We have no other shoes! None!" Ella was really getting in drama queen mode. I mean, seriously, who freaks out over shoes? Honestly? Besides Lady Gaga, but that's just expected.

"Well..." Nudge put her thinking face on. When that happens, run. For your life. I swear, her and Iggy would make a freaking deadly couple. And I don't mean deadly in a good way. I mean in the very, very worst way. Then again, you do have to factor Pikachu in... actually, lets not go down that dark, dark route. "I have perfume!"

"Nudge, we don't ne—is that Chanel?" Ella moved enraptured towards the small pink bottle Nudge was cradling in one palm, eyes wide. And she said Nudge gets distracted by shiny things.

"Totally. Guess how much?"

"Hm..." Ella studied the bottle carefully as I slouched back, letting my shoulders droop, eyebrows raised. "It's Coco... I'm guessing fifty dollars?"

"Higher."

"Sixty?"

"Higher..."

"Seventy-five?"

"Higher!"

"One hundred?"

"And twenty-five!" Nudge squealed. Ella joined in, both of them jumping up and down around this pink crystal bottle. I'm seriously surprised that the mirror didn't crack (even more so than when Ig looked into it). I'm even more surprised that Nudge payed one-hundred and twenty-five dollars... for a bottle of water smelling like roses.

"So, you spent one-hundred bucks," I asked, just to confirm, "on perfume."

"_Chanel _perfume," Ella corrected, rolling her eyes at my lack of knowledge (to which, may I just say, is indicative of me having a _life. _Not literally, you know, because we all have lives, but of what I _do _with my life. Hey, that sounds wise. Remind me to lord that over Iggy at some point), while Nudge nodded enthusiastically.

"Just so you'll smell nice?"

More hyper nodding.

"...You could always just take a shower." I shrugged. They both goggled at me, mouths open. "What? It's free!"

There was a long, long silence. It's true. They're just denying it to themselves because they know I just totally owned them. Yeah. That's it.

"I'm going to choose to ignore Max's stupidity," Ella finally said, sending a smirk at Nudge which was returned. "Let's move onto finding shoes. Max, what do you have?"

"A life," I muttered to myself as I moved to my wardrobe. Like she doesn't know. My beloved shoes are one of the only things I'm pretty OCD about (though, I'm not OCD. I'm CDO – the letters are all in alphabetical order, just like they should be. Get it? I know, I'm cracking up). Yanking the door open, I smiled to see my twenty-six pairs of Converse all lined up perfectly.

"Converse? Are they all official?" Nudge moved to touch one, and I shoved her hand away.

"No freaking duh."

"She freaks out over them," Ella told her helpfully, not at all impressed by my amazing collection. Well, she has seen them a million times, but you know. She could at least pretend.

"True," I conceded, my eyes on my Converse. Hmm. My comic-strip hi-tops looked a little crooked... I wonder if Ella would laugh at me if I straightened it? You know, discreetly, and all. With my grace, she would never even notice...

Surreptitiously, I started to lean backwards as they debated over the most suitable for my dress... nearly there... just a couple more inches... easy, ea—OW. HOLY SHIT, THAT KILLED.

With my grace, I'd fallen smack bang into the middle of all my Converse, and smashed my elbow straight into the wall. Smooth, Max, real smooth.

"Are you okay?" Nudge clambered to help me up, ever the sweet one, while Ella stood by, laughing like a hyena on laughing pills from LaughingTown given from the Laughing Mayor and... I'm going to shut up now.

"You're an idiot," Ella said in her typically kind manner, extending a hand so both her and Nudge could haul me up. See, whereas I felt pretty bashed up, the dress wasn't even creased. So absolutely no bonuses for me. Plus, I'd completely messed up all my Converse. Dammit. Typical. I try to straighten one pair, and end up throwing them all into disarray. Hey, that was a big word! ...I sound like a toddler.

"What were you _doing_?" Ella asked, after a full examination of the dress by her and Nudge. I swear, they care more about the dress than they do about me... like that's a surprise.

"...It was crooked," I said weakly, pointing at my comic hi-tops, which hadn't moved an inch. Argh.

"Freak," Ella rolled her eyes at me, apparently out of giggles.

"Don't insult yourself," I threw back. "Anyway. Which ones?"

"Well we could go for light blue to match the dress or dark blue to contrast or we could even go for white and..."

WHY DID I ASK?

"What do you think?" Nudge asked after her rant, smiling like she thought we'd actually heard a word of it.

"Hm... Light blue," Ella decided, leaning down to scoop them up and throw them at me. Right on time, the doorbell rang, announcing the arrival of Fang, Iggy, Lily, Pikachu (God help me. I'm actually including the thing now) and Nudge's date. Sam and Amber were making their own way there, since they're obviously too cool for us. Actually, that's a lie. We're too cool for them. In every way. Excluding Iggy, naturally.

"Lace them on," Ella instructed, Nudge already gone and her halfway out the door, "then come down, 'kay? _No _changing or I'll kick your butt."

"Since when did you get so... cool?" I actually asked out loud. "And more annoying than usual." Hey, I have a reputation to keep up: I can't just go around calling my irritating little sister cool for threatening to kick my ass. Even though it kind of is. A year ago, she'd never have said that. She was way more plastic, too materialistic. She's grown up, I guess.

"I learned from the master," she winked, smiling. Awww. I guess she's okay, sometimes... "Iggy." And before I could hit her, she was gone, the lingering smell of perfume the only thing left of her. I hate my little sister sometimes, I really do.

Once I was done with my powder blue hi-tops, I stood up to examine myself in the mirror. You wouldn't expect Converse to work with a dress like this, right? You'd expect them to be too clumpy, and just... not right. But the weird thing was, as soon as I put them on, the dress seemed okay. With my beloved hi-tops on, the dress looked... better. Not so short, or revealing. Plus? I had my normal confidence back. Yaroo!

Someone please shoot me for just saying that.

So when I strolled down the stairs to meet the guys (and Lily, and Pikachu... right, this is stopping right now. No more Pikachu inclusions), I wasn't trying to pull the dress down past my knees (not that I'd ever do that...) or all self-conscious, I just... walked down the stairs.

Oh God, I'm turning into Nudge. That was approximately forty-four words too long.

I strolled down the stairs to meet the guys (hallelujah!). Immediately, I felt way over-dressed. WTF? They were _all _in jeans and t-shirts (except for Lily and Pikachu. OH MY GOD. Right, the next time I include Pikachu, I'm going to throw myself off the roof of the Pokemon centre. See what I did there? Yeah, that'd be real funny if it freaking existed). Fang was even wearing the same Green Day t-shirt _I'd _wanted to wear. Oh, Ella and Nudge better have something to say for themselves...

"They're boys," Ella shrugged. "They're allowed."

Hmm... she didn't even start an argument. I wonder what's getting my ickle baby sis down?

"Hai Max!" Lily came over to greet me, which is more than I can say for my supposed best friends (and date). "You look amazing!"

I really didn't, but I decided to let it go for once.

"You too," I nodded, letting her hug me. It wasn't too bad, actually. And I don't hug. Ever. This is like... the second time in one day? Shudder.

Lily did look pretty awesome, though. She'd chosen a long, silky, grass-green dress that matched her eyes perfectly, a lovely contrast against her hair, which she'd done up with green bows to compliment the dress. Her shoes were little green pumps, all petite and dainty. Pretty.

"Max," Iggy moved towards us, sounding amazed. "Did you just... compliment someone?" Lily elbowed him gently so I didn't have to.

"Yeah, and?" I raised my eyebrows.

"You look like an angry gnome when you do that!"

...Deeeeeeeeep breaths Max. Violence is not the answer... when it comes to anyone but Iggy. I grabbed him in a headlock, drawing him down to my height, then kneed him where the sun don't shine. Not all that hard, just enough so he'd feel it, 'cos as much as I hate Ig, I don't seriously hurt my friend's dates. Or my best friends. Even though I hated him. I'm confusing myself now... sigh.

"I hate you," I told him, once I'd released him.

"Love you too," he grinned. "Done the math homework?"

With inhuman effort on my part, I managed to wave goodbye to Lily, and stalk off to where Fang was leaning against the wall, watching us amusedly.

"And you didn't help me kick Ig's ass because?" I leant against the wall beside him. He had a pretty good view from over here: Ella was stood with Lily and Ig near the door, and Nudge and her date were lounging on the sofa, both laughing at something (_possibly_ something one of them said, _probably_ Iggy).

"Because," he shrugged. I waited for him to elaborate, then remembered he was Fang. Stupid, silent, yo-saying freak. Who was also one of my best friends, but that's not important.

"Charming," I raised an eyebrow, and he gave me one of those crooked half-smiles that make me wonder if Dylan traded jobs with him. You know, as the butterfly chief. Yeah, they have a job title now.

"You look-"

"Pictures!" Mum scurried into the room, an old-fashioned camera already in position to take the perfect dance pictures.

"Really?" I complained.

"Of course!" Mum was shocked. "You didn't think I'd let you leave without, did you?"

"Without what? At least fifty?"

"Don't be ridiculous, Max," she rolled her eyes. So that's where I got it from. Well, I always knew it wasn't from Dad. "At least one-hundred."

"And fifty," Fang added, a whisper for my ears only. I snorted quietly, and Ella turned to shoot me a look. I'd forgotten her owl-ears. Meh. She can do nothing. Except trash my Converse. Remind me to get a lock for my wardrobe.

"Look," I moved to pull back the curtains, revealing a sleek, black limo pulling into our drive smoothly. "Limo's here."

I didn't even want to go, but pictures? Ella would use them for the worst kind of blackmail. She might actually make me sing Cheryl Cole. Ugh. My little sister might have grown up a helluva lot recently, but that doesn't mean she's got any sense of decent music taste in her. Even worse than Iggy. And that's saying something. No joke.

"He'll wait," Mum promised. "Now, you and Fang, front and centre."

"Ugh," I muttered under my breath, before moving to stand in front of my mother. I knew better than to argue with her: she was just as immature as any older brother when it came to punishments. I wish I was kidding.

Fang slung an arm around my shoulders, and just as I looked up at him, the humour dancing in my eyes contradicting my raised eyebrows, Mum snapped the picture.

"Perfect!" she exclaimed, before directing us into a million different poses. My life's just so hard, I know.

By the time she was done with her twenty-million pictures, the driver was beeping his horn around fifty times every thirty seconds. People are just so rude these days. I mean, what's next? Fifteen year-old girls hitting their best male friends somewhat constantly? Oh, wait. I already do that. Well, I _am _going to rule the world one day.

"Have fun!" Mum called out as we all – finally – strolled out of the door, much to the driver's relief.

"Right," I said under my breath, sliding in next to Fang. I was followed by Ella, then Nudge, then her date and so on.

"Hey," Fang whispered. I turned to look at him, eyebrows raised questioningly. "It won't be that bad."

"Whatever you say," I leaned back into the flashy, leather seats as we sped away from the house. "Still. When I rule the world, no more dances."

"My army'll help," Fang promised, his lips twitching.

"Your army," I told him, "will be dead by then."

"Other way round, Max. Other way round."

I looked up at him, all ready to give another sarcastic reply, but settled for an eye-roll after seeing the full smile painted across his face.

Maybe this wouldn't be so bad. Maybe. Who am I kidding? It's going to suck, and I know it. Oh well.

**A/N: Sorry, sorry, sorry this is so ridiculously late. You know why? Well, I'd finished it a few days ago, right? And I x'd it, as I was going out, all ready to put up once I was back. And, as always, it asked me if I wanted to save it, or discard it. Guess what? I'm so amazingly intelligent, I accidentally clicked discard. I know, I know, forget Iggy, _I'm _the idiot of this fic. _But _I'm on holiday now, and I'm writing the next chapter right now, so this should HOPEFULLY be up very, very soon. Hope you enjoyed this one!**

**Review?**


	10. Chapter 10

**Disclaimer: I wish.**

**A/N: Thank you for all the reviews! ^-^ They always make my day. So, you all know I kind of suck at updating, so if you sort of want to keep updated on my life, and when I'll be updating, you can follow me on tumblr, at onbrokensouls[dot]tumblr[dot]com. I generally post when I'm writing and stuff, so yeah. Heheh. **

**Song: Always Attract by You Me At Six = love. I saw him perform this with Hayley from Paramore last December. Yeah, be jealous. Best night of my life.**

**The Only Exception – Paramore. Yup, heard this live too – and hopefully will hear it again twice this year ahaha. **

**And just a heads up, you'll probably hate me for this chapter... Enjoyeth!**

I really don't get the point of school dances. I mean, you just go to the same place of torture, _of your own free will, _to see the people you hate all shiny and dressed-up after raiding the make-up counter at Boots and practically clearing out their entire stock. Although, I'm _pretty _sure that Lissa uses Oompa-Loompa's Own. Haven't heard of that infamous range? Good. That means you're not a slav. Congratulations.

Being the amazingly awesome me, I immediately attracted the attention of just about everybody in the room. I kid. About the awesome thing, not that everyone was staring at me. Because they really were. Even Lissa and Brigid had their gazes fixed on me, and Fang, I guess, since he was stood next to me. Everyone else had been taken in by the 'professional' photographer (my science teacher wearing a moustache. Our school's just that cheap), even Ella who was still acting weird. Can someone please explain to me why, after spending twenty minutes having your picture taken, fifty-odd times, the moment you actually get where you want to be, you go have your picture taken? Confusing much?

I was about to shout out 'Take a picture, it'll last longer' (in typical Max fashion. Yes, I am proud I have my own fashion), when two things happened. Wow, how dramatic does that sound? Just call me the Drama Queen. Actually... the Queen of Drama is preferable, thank you very much.

One – our 'world-renowned' DJ (the head of PE wearing sunglasses... and you thought the photographer was bad) started playing Ke$ha (she really needs to learn how to spell her name. I mean, last I checked, $'s not a letter. Next thing you know, we'll be known as G01d3n $113nc3... actually, no, when we decide to change our name to _that _retarded jumble of letter and crap, they will be planning my funeral after my oh-so-tragic suicide. Sorry folks). Me and Fang immediately turned to look at each other and groaned: we'd been hoping for something _slightly _decent, at the very least. I mean, if Sir's so intent on playing Tik Tok, why not the Midnight Beast version? Now _that _I'd enjoy. Though, someone else really did seem to be enjoying the music, if his séance to raise the dead was anything to go by. I really wish I could tell you it's Ella, or Nudge, or just... a girl. Actually, what am I on about? Ig, shock, horror, is secretly a girl. Yup, secret's out. Anyhow, I swear, his 'dancing' and 'singing' is really the brand-new way to raise the dead. No joke.

Two – after we'd managed to tear our eyes from the human freak show (i.e. Iggy), we turned away, only for eyes to settle on the future Oompa Loompa princess. Nope, not Lissa (she's going to be the King, duh). Guess again. Ding ding ding, we have a winner! Yup, it was second in command of the slav army: Brigid.

She sort of sauntered up, brushing her hair back from her surprisingly clean face. I mean clean as in it didn't have a five-inch thick layer of make-up (I'm not going to try and name the various face-paint she slathers on there, because I'll just embarrass myself. Go ask Ella. Actually, don't, she'll do a Nudge on you). Her face just looked ten times uglier without it.

…

...

...Fine, I'm being bitchy, but isn't that what Brigid does best? If you want a non-balanced description, go ask Fang, he doesn't know her.

Actually... on second thoughts, you can't ask Fang either, if the way his eyes are glued to her are any indication. _He _obviously doesn't find her quite so repulsively unattractive... hey, is he blushing? Damn, where's a camera when you need one? Not that, you know, I'd ever embarrass my best friend by exploiting his embarrassment... who am I kidding?

Brilliant. The one time I actually want a picture taken, not a chance.

Anyway, she stopped in front of us, and looks straight at me. I manage to narrow my eyes in a glare and raise my eyebrows at the same. Hey, it's harder than it sounds. _You _try. To my surprise, instead of glaring back, or turning to Lissa (being the coward she is), her gaze turned to the floor, as if she was actually embarrassed.

"What?" I eventually asked, rather rudely even for me. To be honest, right now, I'd rather be moving all the food plates around just to get the organisers all freaked out (you wouldn't believe their OCD. It's a million times worse than my CDO. Seriously). Don't knock it 'till you've tried it, me and Ig almost busted our guts laughing last time.

"I just wanted to say I'm sorry," she eventually said in a sickeningly-sweet voice, looking up at me under her eyelashes like she was flirting with me and... ew, I'm stopping that train of thoughts _right there_, because that topic really is unbearably revolting. "Me and Liss... we've been out of order, and I realise that now. She... we had a disagreement over you, Max, and the others," she looked up at me earnestly. Like I cared. "I asked her to leave you alone, Max, but it was as bad as the time I asked her to do her own homework," she gave a nervous laugh. "We made up then, though, but this time I don't think there's any going back. You were amazing tonight, by the way." She finished with a little suck-up, finally meeting my eyes fully.

W. T. F? Okay, rewind, back up, whatever, just... pause it right there for a second. Brigid Dwyer, someone I'd hated from second glance (the first glance honours went to King Lissa), someone who'd tried to make fun of me, tried to make me a social reject (and failed, I might add. We all know Ig's the social reject around here), _Brigid Dwyer_, had just apologised to me.

Okay, who spiked the punch? There's no freakin' way she's sober right now. I mean, seriously! Drunk or not, if she thinks I'm gonna go all soppy then she's got another think coming. Okay, if it'd been someone like one of the minor slags who'd apologised, then I'd probably have just nodded, and been cordial, then walked off and cracked up laughing. But Brigid? The Princess of Darkness (or redness, if you're going with hair colour)? No. Just no.

"Where's the heroin?" I asked. Don't hate on me, it was one of the, uh... _nicer _options. Considering most of the others were about hitting her in strategic locations.

Brigid turned bug-eyed, and I have to say, not a good look on her (though, what is?). Fang just looked at me, and I could see he was fighting laughter. Like, really fighting laughter. As in, his shoulders were shaking and his mouth was pressed into a single line. _That _kind of fighting laughter.

"What are you talking about?" Brigid eventually replied, still shocked. She really shouldn't be. My one-liners are pretty famous.

"Don't answer a question with a question," I chided. "Where's the heroin you're obviously rather high on?"

"I..." she stuttered, then straightened up and looked me right in the eye. "I'm trying to apologise to you, Max, why are you making this so hard?"

"Well then, good for you." I turned to Fang, the conversation over in my mind. "You comin'?"

And then I walked away. After a split-second hesitation, Fang followed me, though I didn't miss the look he cast over his shoulder at Brigid. I didn't need to turn around to know that she was studying the floor, wondering what she did wrong.

You know what she did wrong? She was a bitch for years. One apology doesn't change that. One apology can't change the past. Hey, that was deep! And people call me stupid (I think they mean Iggy, but you know, whatever).

"You okay?" Fang asked, once we were leaning against a wall out of the way. Hmm. We've done a lot of leaning on walls tonight. We're obviously just that cool.

"Yup, I'm good," I replied, fiddling with my string bracelet, sliding the beads around. "You?"

He studied me for a moment, his eyes flickering to my face, then to my hands, which were still playing with the bracelet.

"You're not," he decided. "Brigid messed you up." He said it coolly, like it was no big deal.

"Nope," I argued. "Just bored."

"You weren't expecting her." Another statement.

"Well, it's only a matter of time before people start bowing to the future world leader, right? It's not _that _big of a surprise, after all."

"You're freaked out." I meant to bait him. I failed.

"Charming!"

"What's she done to you?" he turned to look at me, his eyes dark and shiny in the light. "Before, I mean."

Wow. Butterflies. Without trying to sound like Ella, I will admit that Fang has never looked more handsome than right now. Maybe he and Dylan switched duties for tonight? Like, Fang took control of the butterflies, and Dylan's looking after his army while Fang's not around? Yup, that's it.

"She's just one the whisperers, you know? Lissa's always been the one actually saying things, but Brigid's too big of a coward," I finally conceded. "Doesn't make her any better though."

"So you just shot her down?"

"She deserved it," I said darkly.

"Not saying she didn't. Seemed genuine, though."

"You're on her side?" I looked up at him, feeling kind of... I don't know, hurt? I just... I guess I just expected him to back me up, you know, him being my best friend, and all. Guess I expected wrong.

"No." No elaborations, no explanations, just a rock-solid, simple answer.

"...Thanks."

I looked up into his eyes again, and the butterflies let rip, seriously threatening to tear right out of my stomach and make a rather unscheduled appearance. His gaze locked into mine, and I felt like I was sort of... melting-

"See now, was that really that hard to say?"

We both jumped, and I spun round accusingly to see Iggy, one arm slung around Lily's neck, grinning like an idiot.

Please tell I didn't just think that I was melting into his eyes. That is the corniest thing I've ever thought. I mean, seriously? Ew.

"Get lost, Ig," I glared at him, slapping his face lightly. His grin just grew even broader in reply. "Seriously! Go... go crawl in a corner and die."

"Aw, you don't mean that," he winked at me.

"Oh believe me, I do."

"Nah, you don't. You love me, see."

"You wish!" I spluttered.

"I don't need to wish," he said, placing a hand on his heart in a typically love-struck expression that I really wanted to smack right off of his face.

"You really do. Go die."

"You know you don't want that to really happen."

"Oh yeah? Why not?"

"Your life'd be boring without me," he winked again, and I just rolled my eyes, turning to Lily.

"You really want to date _that?_"

"_That _has a name!"

"Oh, sorry," I slapped my head like I'd just remembered something. "You really want to date _Thing?_"

"If I'm Thing 1, you're Thing 2!" Iggy said, smiling.

"Shut up, Thing, I'm talking to Lily here!"

Lily just blushed, smiling sweetly. Aw. She's like a little girl. Cute.

"See? Everyone loves me," Iggy grinned victoriously.

"Your loss," I told Lily, prompting a giggle from her, and a low chuckle from Mr Silent over there. "I'm gonna get some punch," I told Fang. "And move a few plates around while I'm there," me and Ig high-fived, remembering last year's epic triumph (one of the organisers broke down in tears). "Anyone want anything?"

"Nah," Ig said. "I have it on good authority it's a slow dance next, and I'm going to ask Lily to dance with me like the gentleman I am."

Lily's cheeks reddened even more.

"Reject him," I advised. "Want anything?"

"I'm fine, thank you!" she said brightly, smiling as Ig glared at me. Personally, I have reason to believe my advice is amazing, but each to their own.

"Tall, dark and silent?"

Fang shook his head, his lips curving. What can I say? I have a talent for nicknames, I know.

"Alright," I aimed a kick at Ig as I strolled off. "Back in a few!"

"Take your time," Ig called after me. I shot the bird back at him, smiling to myself. "No, seriously!"

Idiot.

As I made my way to the long table laden with carefully-arranged plates, I was more than aware that a _lot _of eyes were on me. I guess people never expected to see the day I wore a dress, huh? Well, me neither. I might have to self-harm later to, you know, erase the memories, but right now? It could be worse. I'm kidding about the self-harming thing, by the way. Like, seriously kidding.

I grabbed a paper cup, and poured some of the raspberry-red punch into it, still painfully aware of the gazes on me. Honestly. Some people have no shame. As I picked up one of the plates, all ready to send the organisers into a nervous breakdown (if they hadn't already had one. I mean, seriously, putting up streamers can be a difficult experience for anyone), Always Attract by You Me At Six came on. You have to be kidding me. They play a way more than decent band, and it just has to be a slow song. Typical. I shoved a few plates about, starting slowly: I knew they'd notice, then I'd just move one plate each time... Excellent.

Retrieving my cup, I turned around, my eyes searching for where I'd left Fang. It wasn't like he'd be dancing with anyone either. Hey, we could make fun of all the soppy idiots dancing (i.e. Iggy. Not Lily. Just Iggy)! He wasn't there, though. Hmm. Guess it's time for a game of Find the Emo! Way better than _Where's Wally?_ any day. Want to play? Kidnap Fang, then untie him. Wait, that's Emo Run... uh... so, anyway...

Maybe he's in the bathroom or something. Well, duh, Max. Took me a while, huh? I moved away from the table just as one of the organisers came over to grab some chicken, or whatever else they wanted, and just stare at the table like they couldn't comprehend what they were seeing. Then, very slowly, they backed away, and looked at it some more, before pursing their lips and walking off, throwing glances at it over their shoulder every few steps. Oh, you ain't seen nothing yet, love.

Bored, I surveyed the dance floor. Iggy and Lily were there, obviously. Lily had her head resting contentedly on Ig's chest, and Ig was smiling sweetly down at her. Since when did Iggy smile sweetly? Another camera opportunity (I'm sorry, but that's just too good for blackmail), and no camera in sight. Typical. Nudge and her date, Luke (I remembered!), were both gazing into each other's eyes, all love-struck, but the most shocking thing by far? You couldn't see Nudge's teeth. Yup, her mouth was closed. The first miracle in years (since she was born. The last miracle was how long she could talk without taking a breath. At three). Even Ella was dancing with some soccer player in my year. He was comically tall, and Ella looked like a midget next to him (even though she's taller than me), but they both seemed happy, so hey ho.

Hey, is that Brigid? Ha, I knew she'd go crawling back to Lissa and their pathetic slav crew. They'd obviously paired her up with some tall black-haired boy by use of fluttering spider-leg eyelashes and pursed lips (I'm not going to describe what I think they look like. Too rude). She looked really happy, though, her eyes bright, her face split by a smile. I couldn't see the poor guy's face, but I felt sorry for him.

For some reason, I couldn't stop watching them. Don't make a stalker joke, I know you're about to. My gaze was just drawn to them. It was only when the 'DJ' announced the next song (The Only Exception, by Paramore. They play one of my favourite songs _ever _by my favourite band ever, and I have no one to dance to it with. Typical. How many times have I said typical tonight? Sigh. Too many times) that they spun round, and I saw his face. And felt my heart drop. Like, around a million miles. As in, my heart physically hurt.

Because guess who it was? Do I even need to say it? My best friend. Fang.

And don't get me wrong, it's not because I'm in love with him, or anything, because... just no. I'm just kind of hurt, I guess. Because he lied to me. That whole thing about being on my side? It was nothing. A lie.

The worst thing? I would've danced with him to that song. Heck, I would dance with anyone to The Only Exception. Fang _knew _I loved that song. He knew me well enough to know that I'd have danced to it, would've _wanted _to dance to it. He knew all that, but he didn't even let go of Brigid in the gap between the two songs.

Typical.

Just as the chorus started, I felt a tap on the shoulder and almost jumped out of my skin. I turned round to face a familiar blue-eyed boy who I'd thought was at home in his bedroom. His hair was windswept, and he was panting hard, though, so I figured he'd just ran all the way here. For me. Okay, even _I'll _admit that's pretty freaking romantic.

"Hey," he said between breaths, waiting until he had his breath fully back before asking: "Do you want to dance?"

I let my eyes meet his, almost losing myself again in the pure ocean blue colour, the small flecks of hazel like ice-cream lashings circling out. No butterflies, though. Was that a good thing? Heck yeah, no more stomach ache.

"Okay," I finally said, and let him pull me into his arms. I led him onto the dance floor, though, because the day I become dependant on men will be the day I die (i.e. I'll let male doctors try and treat me).

We danced to the sound of Hayley singing about her only exception, and I smiled. Really smiled. I'm not love-struck or anything, heck, I'm not even sure I'm in love, but... what a fitting song right now.

Fang didn't even notice us he was so wrapped up in Brigid (literally). Maybe that's for the best: if he looked at me, the butterflies would re-ignite, and I don't want my partner to feel them. That'd just be plain embarrassing.

Ella did, though. She lifted one hand and gave me a thumbs-up, grinning. Her and the soccer player had stayed on the floor, too. Maybe she'd found a boyfriend tonight, even with her lower-than-low expectations of any romance any time soon. Sweet.

Just before the song ended, I looked up, and smiled at Dylan.

**A/N: Told you you'd hate me. Just remember that in the end, Fax will always triumph. Ahaha, sorry this is a little late . Hope you enjoyed it though. **

**Review?**


	11. Chapter 11

**Disclaimer: I no own. **

**A/N: Response for the last chapter: amazing. Thank you all so much, makes my day seeing all those emails in my inbox ^-^ Anyway. In this chapter, there's a line from the absolutely amazing _Lovely Complex _manga. If you like anime/manga, then seriously, go watch it/read it. Both the anime and manga are crack-up funny, and I'm completely in love with it. **

**Other than that... enjoyeth. **

Monday morning, as I stroll into school with a curious Ella at my side, I immediately clock several anomalies (I know, I feel clever right now thanks to that one word. Don't laugh at me). Which, for me, is pretty freaking amazing, because I'm only ever a quarter conscious on _good _Monday mornings. On a normal Monday, I sleepwalk. No joke.

Anyway, the anomalies (I'm just going to keep using that word now. It makes me feel like the next female Einstein): one, Fang wasn't leaning against the gates, trying his best to ignore Iggy and pretend he wasn't with him whilst scanning the incoming crowd for me, and two, Dylan was there in his place, jumping up and down on the balls of his feet, both to keep cold, and because he was nervous. I know these things. Wow, that sounded cool.

"Ohmigod!" Ella reached out and pulled a lock of my hair, which she _knows _annoys the crap out of me. Okay, so I accept that I'm petite (no, _not_ short or small) but I really don't need to be reminded of it every five minutes by just about everyone. "Look! He's there! He's so waiting for you!"

"Thank you Captain Obvious," I rolled my eyes. Boys really do have a strange effect on Ella. They turn into a babbling idiot, i.e. Nudge.

"No problem, Lieutenant Sarcasm," she said with a grin, her eyes still flicking between me and Dylan. Honestly. The girl knows no shame.

"Hey, freaks," I greeted them affectionately, Ella waving cheerfully next to me.

"I take that personally, you know," Ig mimed crying, one hand over his heart.

"That's the point," I reminded him, rolling my eyes, before turning to Dylan. "Hey, Dyl!" I could see in his eyes that he was sizing me up, trying to figure out whether last night had changed anything. And, honestly? I was kind of waiting for him to tell me. Did I want something to change? ...God, I don't know. If you'd asked me last week if I wanted a boyfriend, I'd either have given you a strange look, or punched you in the face (if you're a boy). If you'd told me last week I'd be wondering whether or not _Dylan _was my boyfriend, I would've cracked up laughing. Now... not so much.

"Hey," he replied, smiling slightly. The way one of his hands fingering the strap of his backpack, though, betrayed his nervousness. Ella nudged me oh-so-obviously. See, this is where I should pretend that nothing just happened, and enter into a completely normal, neutral conversation with Dylan, right?

"_What?_" Instead, I rounded on Ella. "Is this because I didn't just start making out with him instantly? God, El."

There was a long, long silence, and everyone looked at me. I mean, _everyone. _Dylan's cheeks were practically on fire, Iggy was holding in laughter, and Ella looked absolutely mortified for me. Or maybe because her dance partner from last night was standing right behind me, staring at me like I was from another planet (that's Ig).

"Um... I was just gonna say that Fang's over there," Ella finally said in a small voice, pointing to where I could see Fang heading into school with a rather familiar, red-haired girl at his side. She really does have the most annoying walk. And I mean, God, what was she thinking with her hair? It's like she set fire to her head and forgot to put it out. It's like, all out of control in the most horrible way. Eurgh.

"Oh, right," I replied, mentally slapping myself a million and one times. "How come he didn't walk with you?" I turned to Ig, eyebrow raised.

"_That_," he said darkly, gesturing clearly at Brigid, "turned up at our house this morning, with some bull about having no one to walk with. She woke Pikachu up!"

"How she know where you _live_?" I chose to ignore his last sentence.

"I mean, she needs her sleep! How can she be expected to go kick some Gym Leader ass if she's half-asleep? It's ridiculous!" He chose to ignore me.

"Snap out of it," Ella rolled her eyes, though most of her attention was clearly on the boy from last night, who was walking away.

"_You _snap out of it," he replied childishly.

"Excuse me?" Ella turned her attention to him finally, her arms folded and eyebrows raised. She really is becoming more and more like me, you know. She's like a mini me. Except, she's not really a mini me, because she's taller, you know? I think you do.

"Either tear after him like a camel with no head, or Pikachu on steroids, or a penguin with only one flipper, or Sam deprived of COD, or-"

"The point?" I interrupted, earning a chuckle from Dylan (whose cheeks seemed to have cooled down to a healthy rosy colour, thank God) and a dark glare from Iggy.

"_Or _stand there like a lemon and do nothing."

Their eyes met for a moment, just a moment, before Ella mumbled a quick 'Seeya' and started sprinting after him. Nudge, who'd just walked in, shot me a WTF look from over at the gates. I just shrugged, mouthing 'boy.' She nodded, like she suddenly understood the meaning of life, and sprinted off after El.

So, that leaves me with Pikachu's boyfriend, and Dylan. Whose company do I prefer? Is it really that hard? Is it? Is it really? Why am I still asking myself questions like one of those crappy Gossip Girl episode intros that Ella's always watching?

"Go find Lily," I told Iggy, suddenly. He looked at me like I was mad. Which I'm not, just to clarify.

"Why?" he asked, his voice coloured with suspicion.

"Just go!"

"Why?" he whined.

"Go. Now."

"Or what?"

"I'll kill Pikachu."

"Just tell me why!"

"I hate her with every fibre of my being."

"Yeah, tell me something I don't know! I mean, why do I have to go?"

"Dude," Dylan cut in, shaking his head. "Just go. Please?"

"Fine," Ig finally conceded, backing away slowly, bringing two fingers to his eyes then flicking them at us at hyper-speed. "But I'm watching you... very closely..." he gave his sad idea of an evil laugh that sounded like a choking cat.

"Just go!" we yelled out together. Finally, after a few more minutes of obscene mining I really do not want to describe, the crowd swallowed him. Let's just say I'm bleaching my brain once I get home. Anything to get rid of those gestures. _Anything._

"So..." Dylan said awkwardly after a few minutes of – you guessed it – awkward silence. I flicked my hair out of my eyes – awkwardly, and he pulled his bag strap further up his shoulder. Awkwardly.

Let's just say it was a rather awkward moment all around.

Our next conversation went a little bit like this:

Me: "So."

Dylan: "So..."

Me: "Sooooo..."

Dylan: "So, uh..."

Me: "So..."

Dylan: "Yeah, so..."

Me: "So."

The bell rang.

Dylan: "So, yeah?"

Me: "Yeah."

And then we both walked away. I don't know about him, but in my mind, I was giving myself a seriously severe beating. What kind of idiot am I? A Max-shaped one, that's what kind.

I let myself fall into the crowd easily, fighting back the wave of nausea that threatened to roll over me at the feeling of being squashed between so many warm bodies. Once free, I took a deep breath, then started down a much quieter corridor, scuffing the floor with my Converse angrily with each step.

Ow, ow, ow. My toes hurt. What an Iggy thing to do.

"Hey, Max?" I felt a warm hand on my shoulder, and did what I always did with a possible threat: I turned round and slapped whoever it was right in the face.

"Ow," Dylan rubbed his jaw tenderly, looking at me with reproachful eyes. "Too far too fast?"

"Are you okay?" I asked, laughing at both his joke and my paranoia.

"Yeah," he grinned at me, though his left cheek was scarlet. "I'm fine. I was just gonna say... uh... what was I gonna say? Smooth, Dylan, smooth..." he gazed heavenward for a moment, seeming to forget I was there, before snapping his fingers. "Oh yeah! Uh... I'll see you at break."

"Lame," I sang, giggling.

"That's me," he said with a wink.

"No shit Sherlock," I rolled my eyes, but I was smiling. "You should go, you know. Want to get your butt kicked by Edwards?"

"See you," he pulled a face, then grinned and ran off again.

God. Boys. One minute it's all awkward, the next it's... well, still awkward, for me and Dylan, at least.

I pushed the door open and walked into homeroom like in a trance: my mind was still all full of awkward moments, and Dylan, and... ugh, let's just not go there, okay? A virtual tour of my mind means hell for everyone. No joke.

All my thoughts dissipated, though, when I looked at my chair. Let's review those last two words, shall we? _My _chair. The one I've sat in all year, the one that's known as _Max's _chair. As in, I sit there, _every _homeroom. As I've done since the beginning of this year.

Except guess what? There was something stuck to my chair. At least, I'm assuming it's ass is super-glued to my chair, because there's no one stupid enough to sit in Maximum Martinez's chair. Except, obviously, Brigid.

If I was someone else, a typically nice, socially-accepted, charming girl, I'd have gone and sat somewhere else, not wanting to cause trouble. Except, as Ig likes to describe, I'm not a typically nice, socially-accepted, charming girl; I'm loud, annoying, over-violent, more than slightly psychopathic, and I'm going to rule the world one day.

And guess what? The future world leader doesn't particularly like some plastic girl, who probably had 'Made In China' emblazoned upon her back, sitting in her chair.

So I marched right up to her, and just stood there for a moment, glaring down at her. I won't lie to you, I felt tall for once in my life, and yes, I enjoyed it. Giant Max. Has a kind of ring to it, don't you think? I do.

The really, really annoying thing? She didn't even notice. She just kept on chattering away like a _really, really_ annoying chipmunk. Those italics were necessary, yes. And even they don't tell you half of it.

"I think I want to be a doctor, when I'm older," she was going on in that ridiculously high-pitched voice, throwing her flame-thrower hair over her shoulder so flirtatiously I wanted to rip it right off. Yet, I'm not violent at all. Honest.

"Hey, Doctor Stupendous? Mind getting the hell outta my seat?" I finally decided to cut in, letting just enough toxin leak into my voice, though it was dripping with ice. She jumped, looking up at me with those stupid greeny-blue eyes. I mean, why can't they just decide on one colour? What's the point in having two? It's just ridiculous.

"Oh, Max!" Oh my God. She sounded like some crappy actress in some romantic movie, where's it's all about sighing each other's names. The point? There isn't one. "I'm so sorry! I completely forgot! I just got talking to Fang, and..." she seemed to realise I really, really couldn't care less and just wanted my seat back. "I guess I'll see you later, Fang."

And then she stood up, and took her normal seat next to King Lissa, who completely ignored her. Serves her right. She loses her friend, so she goes to her worst enemy? How the hell does that work? How stupid. Well, I guess it _is _Brigid, so what was I expecting?

I didn't look at Fang as I sat down. Not once. Not even a glance. Especially not a lingering one. Honestly, I didn't want to turn around, and see that he was watching Brigid, or, even worse, smiling at her.

Okay, I know what it sounds like. I know what you're all thinking (that sounds creepy. Not in that way). I know that you're all like 'OMG! MAX LOVES FANG! She's jealous!' and you're all having a total Nudge moment, and all that crap, 'kay? And yeah, I am jealous, but there's no way I'm in love with him, alright? I guess I just got used to having him all to myself. And I guess I figured that he'd stick with me, and not Brigid, and I obviously got it completely wrong. So, no, I'm not in love with him. I'm just torn between whether or not I want to slap him several times around the face, extremely hard, or hug him.

After that encounter with Doctor Stupendous, though, I'm definitely leaning towards the first option.

The real kicker, though? He doesn't try to talk to me. He ignores me just as much as I ignore him. Ouch. I'm not the one who walked off on him last Friday. That was all him.

**[ X X X ]**

"What's up?" Ella caught on to my foul mood straight off at break. I just shook my head, glaring at the floor intensely.

"Is it Fang?" Nudge joins in, annoyingly.

"He's an idiot," Dylan chimed in.

"Finally!" Iggy rejoiced. We all turned to look at him, eyebrows raised. "What?" he shrugged. "I just shed my status as the school idiot!"

"Dream on," Ella elbowed him, rolling her eyes.

"Where is he, anyway?" Sam asked, looking bored as always, though his eyes were concerned. See. They all love me really.

"With Doctor Stupendous," I said darkly, my glare returning sevenfold. Ella just raised an eyebrow. "Brigid."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

There was an awkward silence for a moment, and even Iggy and Nudge didn't break the silence, which is pretty damn amazing for them.

"So..." Dylan finally said.

"We are _not _going back there," I shot back, smiling slightly.

"Thank God," he grinned back, brushing his hair out of his eyes.

"Hey," Ella drew my attention a few moments later, "he's coming over here."

I glanced up, and, lo and behold, the man himself was slouching his way over here. His walk's really annoying too, now that I think about it. Maybe that's why he and the Freak Doctor make such an 'amazing' couple.

"Hey," he nodded at me directly. _At me._ All my anger from earlier seemed to bubble up, from Brigid this morning, and from watching them dance Friday night.

"What," I said very distinctly through my teeth, "do _you _want?"

"What," he mimicked, "do you mean?"

"Here she goes..." I heard Ella murmur. Fang's gaze flickered to her for a millisecond before landing on me again, curious, but I barely even noticed, my gaze was so red.

"What do you _think _I mean? You think you can just go off with her, all the freaking time, then come back over here and act like nothing's even happened? Like you think I don't _care_?" I let rip, my voice weighed down with anger. "Go on. Go back to your damn girlfriend."

There was absolute silence. Not even the sound of anyone breathing. Pure silence, and I wondered if he was just going to walk away. Our friendship over, just like that.

But then his eyes met mine, the butterflies stirring again, and he spoke, "She asked me to dance." I waited for elaboration, but it was like hoping for rain in the Sahara desert. Nothing. Like that one sentence solved it all.

"So all she has to do is bat her eyelashes, and that's it? Whatever, Fang."

"I had no choice."

"And then you walked into school with her too? What about Ig? And me? You just left us all, for her, again!"

"I had no choice."

"Oh play me a new record," I gave him the death glare reserved for only when I'm at my angriest.

"Re-enaction!" Ella suddenly called out, causing us all to look at her like she was mad. She ignored us, turning to Iggy and giving him her sparkly, tear-filled eyes. "Hold me..." she spoke in a winsome voice.

"I have no choice," Iggy said, catching on, and replying in the sad tone she obviously wanted him too. I raised an eyebrow, but they ignored me.

"Kiss me..."

"I have no choice."

"Don't act like you're in some weird drama," Fang sighed. It was one of the longest things I think I'd ever heard him say. Typical.

"But I had no choice?" Iggy said, clearly confused.

"Just because we're way too like you and Brigid for your own comfort, Fang," Ella said pityingly, rolling her eyes at me.

"It's not my fault," he said, his voice finally reflecting emotion: anguish.

"It's _never _your fault, is it Fang?" I sighed, my eyes still narrowed in a glare.

"It's not!" he shouted, the sound reverberating around the room. He was tensed, his shoulders hunched, and as he slowly relaxed I realised I'd jerked away from him, out of our little bubble, surprised.

"Just go to her, Fang," I said, tired. Then I lied, a huge lie that sealed the deal, the ending of our 'friendship'. "I don't care any more."

And you know what hurt the most? As I watched him walk away, as Ella wrapped an arm around my shoulders, and Dylan whispered softly into my ear, I knew that he believed it. That he wasn't going to come back any time soon. He'd chosen Brigid last Friday night – he'd spent all weekend with her, from what Ig'd told me.

He'd chosen her over his best friends. And I'd just cemented that decision.

**A/N: I know, I know, way too over-dramatic and crap, but honestly, what did you expect from Max? Meh. It'll all work out, you know all that. I'll reply to reviews tomorrow from the last chapter, I don't have time right now, I'm sorry! I _will _reply though, I promise. Anyway, I hope you kind of liked it. **

**Review?**


	12. Chapter 12

**Disclaimer: I'mma just keep on dreaming.**

**A/N: Ridiculous amount of reviews, it's so amazing. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Honestly, it just makes my day. I just want to reply to one anonymous reviewer [skip ahead, if you want]:**

**Quietbettle: Oh. Oops. -.- I didn't pay so much attention to Valencia's hair, ahah, I guess I imagined her with blonde hair when I was writing her in this fic, but thanks for pointing it out, I'll fix it from here on in ^-^ And, yeah, I spell it Mum, 'cos, as mentioned on several occasions, I _am _British, and, American as I'm trying to make this story, every time I'd write Mom, a part of my Britishness would die (; Sorry. **

**Just wanted to clarify a couple of things that review pointed out, for everyone really! ^-^ Sorry this is so late, I've been working like hell on something original, and I published a Max Ride one-shot a couple of days ago, so check that out if you want – I'd really appreciate any feedback you guys have! **

**So, here we gooo~**

Guess what? It's Saturday, and I'm heading off to work. I know, I know, I can tell you're all having a WTF moment, and I really don't blame you – Ig tried to slap some sense into me when I first told him. Let's just say he won't be having children any time soon, and he was very, very sorry afterwards.

Okay, so my job (God, it feels weird saying that). _I _didn't want it – no, I _don't _want it. _I _wasn't the one who went and freaking applied for it – _Ella _did.

Is it time for a flashback? I think it is. Cue dramatic lighting and the Jaws theme...

"_Hey!" Ella swung through the front door, looking abnormally pleased with herself. Glancing up from my spot, slouched on the sofa texting Dylan, I saw that her hair wasn't perfectly straight, and, when Ella's hair's messy, people _die. _Or get severely injured. People = me. Hmm. Worrying time. _

"_What the hell's up with you?" _

"_Excuse me?" Ella perched her backside (see? No swearing. I'm learning). "It is a sad, sad day when a young girl can't come in from an afternoon out with her best friend-"_

"_Save it," I rolled my eyes at her. "What've you done?" _

"_I can't believe you're accusing me of this!"_

"_I can't believe you've managed to deny it for this long. This is a record for you."_

"_What are you on about?" she gave me a weird look. _

"_Well, you normally crack after a minute or so, but-" I checked the time on my iPhone (yes, I feel the need to say iPhone rather than mobile every time. Get over it) "-according to my iPhone, it's been two minutes, so congratulations."_

"_Have I mentioned recently I hate you?" she glared at me._

"_That," I said darkly, pointing at her with my index finger, "is _my _line, and you know it. Don't deny it." _

"_Wouldn't dream of it," she said with a grin. _

"_Okay, spill. What have you been doing?" I finally gave in. _

"_Just getting the new lip gloss from that brand I like," she replied, shrugging nonchalantly. Urgh. Please someone hold me back – I'm _that _close to throttling her. No. Joke. _

_"Okay," I said very slowly, trying to keep- no, become calm. "What else?" _

_"Nothing, really," she said, her tone bored. There was a spark in her eyes, though, that suggested something completely different. Cue a deep sigh on my part. "Stopped by Bessie's teapot." _

_"There's a teapot in our kitchen, you know," I shot her a weird look. I mean, who goes out to look at someone's teapot? "You didn't need to go to all that trouble."_

_"You really are an idiot," she giggled, for no apparent reason. _

_"I'm not the one going to look at teapots!" I bit back, insulted. _

_She shook her head, laughing, "The café opposite your death wish park?" _

_"Death wish?" _

_"You're the ones throwing yourselves off hills made of concrete." _

_"You're the one who's going to get make-up poisoning." _

_"Make-up poisoning?" _

_"Poisoning from make-up." _

_"Well, you don't say," she rolled her eyes at me. _

_"You asked!"_

_"As in-" she cut herself off, shaking her head again. "Never mind." _

_"Go on." I prompted, glaring. _

_"Go on what?" _

_"So you went to Bessie's, and then?" _

_"Oh. Well, guess what? They're hiring!" _

_Oh. My. Wizard. God. (Yes, that's right, I watched A Very Potter Musical. And I enjoyed it. So there.) Please. No. _

_"You got a job?" I asked incredulously, because, honestly, the chances of Ella getting a job are like the chances of Malfoy (a.k.a Lauren Lopez) ever actually going to Pigfarts (I'm planning to enrol. No joke)._

_"Nope," she grinned. "You do, though." _

_And then hell broke loose. Let's just say, physical violence was employed, and I ended up taping a sheet of paper to her door later that night: _

_Reasons why Maximum Martinez has declared war on Ella Martinez_

_1. Max now has to get up before 12am on both Saturday _and_ Sunday, although thankfully without the help of Iggy (her new lock was proving effective). _

_2. She. Has. To. Get. Up. Before. Twelve. It's worthy of two reasons. _

_3. As afore mentioned, she has to get up before twelve for _work._ Where anyone can come and laugh at her. _

_4. Ella spends too much time in the bathroom, and the lock on her bedroom was completely unnecessary. _

_5. Ella stole Max's headphones and claimed the dog ate them (they don't own a dog). _

_6. Ella allows Nudge into the house. _

_7. Ella is going to laugh at Max at her new job. _

_8. Ella is going to get everyone else to laugh at Max at her new job. _

_9. Ella likes Lady Gaga._

_10. Ella is Ella. _

_I could've mentioned many, many more, but that would overload her little brain. _

Smirking at the memory, I turn the door into the little café, wondering what her reaction would be - I only did it this morning, and guess what? She wasn't up when I left. Because, you know, some people can actually _sleep in _on a Saturday morning.

"Maximum, darling!" I'm immediately enfolded into the arms of... a man? "So nice to have you working here!"

As politely as I can (which isn't very politely, seeing as I am me), I extract myself, noting the wetness of my cheek, most likely from a pair of male lips. Sure enough, in front of me, is a man with sandy-blond hair, and a scarf tied around his neck. I kid you not.

"Uh," I said eloquently. "I thought I was working for Bessie?" Oh, nice Max, point out the obvious, why don't you?

He laughed. I've never heard a camper laugh.

"Bessie's my mother!" he tried to put an arm around my shoulders; I moved. "Well, come on in, let's get you all kitted out, shall we? I'm Simon, and I'll be your employer!"

He giggled at his own crappy humour as he led me into a back room, lined with hooks adorned with plain, white, dirty aprons and caps. _Caps. _No. No way. I refuse to look like an absolute Iggy (my new substitute for the word idiot. If the shoe fits...).

"So, dear, just pick an apron, and then we'll get you out there," he grinned at me; I recoiled. "Come out when you're ready!"

He skipped out. Skipped. I'm not joking. I have absolutely nothing against gays - it's just Saturday morning, and I was hoping for a woman as tired as me, but no. I got a possibly gay man (what am I on about, possibly? No, Max, no assuming) who's as wide awake as if it's six pm (which, incidentally, is only the time I really wake up).

I surveyed the ugly dress-like things swaying on the hooks, and cursed Ella to a life without lipstick. Or lipgloss. Or any manufactured thing that you put on your lips. Ever. Ha. That's what I call revenge. Reaching out, I grabbed one, then shoved it on, hoping it was the right way. I knotted the strings behind me, not daring to look down at my Iggyotic appearance. God help me.

Okay, this apron thing is bad enough - there is no way, in hell, I'm wearing the hat. Nothing against hats, I'm sure they all have very nice personalities, just no. Not ever. Get it? Got it?

Good.

Here goes... I pushed open, and crept back into the restaurant, quickly scanning the tables for any sign of teenage life. None yet, thank God.

"Max!" Simon came bounding over (literally). "Oh, don't you look lovely! Like a real member of the Teapot family!"

I resisted the urge to gag. Please let that be the last mention of any family within this restaurant, teapot-related or not.

"So, you just have to take orders," he jumped over to an empty table. I just stood there, arms folded. "And then clip them to this string here," he leapt to a pulley-system with several clothes pegs tagged onto it, "give it a little tug," he demonstrated with a flourish, "and then you're all done! Just grab the food and everything when you see it here, okay?" He gestured to an empty crevice in the wall. "Oh, look! Your first customers!"

I glanced over at the door, hoping for some adorable old couple, and was instead met with a stony emo kid, and a way over-perky red-haired girl wearing some skirt that was obviously meant to show three-quarters of her knickers.

You. Are. Kidding. Me.

No, this isn't true. It really is some joke. It's just a crappy nightmare, and I'm going to wake up any moment with Iggy's Iggyotic face in mine, right up close, a stupid beam plastered across the face.

There was a silence, and we all just looked at each other. I swear Fang's lips were twitching. Honest. Astonished, Brigid just gazed at me with big eyes.

Oh, shit.

No, they were definitely twitching... oh my God, he was trying not to laugh. Oh my wizard God, I'm going to kill him. I really am.

"Well, good luck!" Simon started to skip off, before turning back to yell, "May the teapot be with you!"

I just stood there, mortified, as he cackled to himself in the kitchen, perfectly audible to everyone. Mental facepalm time.

"Sit down," I ordered the happy couple, not looking at them. When they didn't move, I sent them a quick glare. "_Sit down! _God!"

Okay, so I wasn't in the best mood. Would you? I mean, you're at a crappy job, with a weird employer, wearing a crappy apron, and your former crappy best friend just walked in with his new girlfriend. Brilliant situation, that.

"What _are _you doing here, Max?" Brigid asked, _still not sitting down. _

"What are _you _doing here, Brigid?" I mocked, kicking a chair her way. Oh my wizard God, just sit down, you stupid stupendous Doctor!

"Me and Fang just thought we'd grab some coffee before we went to catch a movie," she replied, all smiles as she _finally _sank down into the chair. I really wanted to raise an eyebrow at Fang, mouthing 'coffee?' because, hello, Fang hates coffee. And tea, for that matter. But of course, I couldn't. It tends to ruin your friendship, having a giant argument and then not talking for five days.

Because five days of me not talking is pretty major for me.

"Good for you," I said shortly after Dark, Silent and Infinitely Annoying joined her at the table. "Hang on."

I marched off, mentally swearing as loudly and as explicitly as I could, grabbing two menus off the rack at the door, and noting with dismay that Ella, arm-in-arm with Nudge, Dylan, Iggy and Sam tailing behind them both, was coming up the path. She caught sight of me and waved; I shot her the bird.

Let me off, okay? I'm in a crappy mood.

Turning my back on the group of people I currently hated most in the world despite them all being my best friends, I slammed the vinyl-coated menus down on their table, muttering ... _things _about Ella under my breath.

"Oh, thank you," Brigid thanked me, all sunshine and lollipops. Well, not lollipops, or sunshine for that matter, but you know what I mean. "I'll have coffee please!"

"Sorry," I apologised in my sweetest, most genuine voice. "We don't serve hags."

She gasped, Fang burst out laughing, and there was applause from the guys behind me.

"Now that," Sam said, coming to my side to lean on my shoulder, "is an insult."

"High-five, shortie," Iggy added, grinning as he shoved his sweaty palm in my face.

"Get lost," I shoved him away forcefully, glaring at the devil.

"Nice apron," she winked, dragging Nudge to a table so I couldn't batter her to within an inch of her life.

Dylan nodded at me as he passed, amusement dancing in his eyes, but he was too nice to say anything - plus he knew I'd probably elbow him where the sun don't shine, just to get fired.

"Hmph," Brigid looked at me, _tears _in the corners of her eyes before she blinked them away, and stood. "Come on, Fang."

Yeah, go on, Fang. Make another decision. Stick with us, or your pet retard (not Iggy. The other one).

"Let's get your coffee," he eventually said quietly. "We did come here."

"I guess," she sighed, already placated, sinking back down, glancing at me. "Coffee, please, Max."

I smirked at her, scrawling down HAG LIQUID, then turned the pad around, so she could see. She murmured something about immaturity, but I could see Fang's shoulders were shaking. Some boyfriend, huh? He's real loyal. Didn't want him as a friend anyway.

"Excuse me?" Ella called out, oh so sweetly. "Waiter? Menus?"

Iggy snorted, "Yes, Sir, you seem to be forgetting us."

Stalking over to them, I grabbed Fang and Brigid's menus and threw them at the guys, "And you seem to be forgetting I'm not against murdering you all in your sleep. I'd enjoy it."

There was a chorus of 'oohs' as I stormed off, clipping Brigid's paper to the paper line (see what I did there? I think you did), before pushing into the kitchen, an idea forming in my mind.

"Hey," I nodded at the chef who was stood in the fire exit, smoking a cigarette. "I'm the new waitress. Mind if I make this drink?"

"Whatever," he consented with a wave of his hand, taking another drag of his cigarette. Another glance at him proved he was definitely hung-over. Ew.

I grabbed a mug from the stack on one side, placed it on the counter, flicking the kettle on. Then I looked around for something brown and generally disgusting I could shove in there.

What? You actually thought I was going to make Doctor Stupendous _coffee? _Yeah, right. Not in this lifetime. Or any other, for that matter.

My eyes locked onto a wilting potted plant, perched precariously on the edge of the lone windowsill. A plant pot... filled with mud. I couldn't... could I?

Yes. Yes I could.

Scooping up a handful of germ-infested mud, I flung it haphazardly into the mug, pouring the boiling into it too. The mud dissolved, leaving a misleadingly healthy brown colour that could definitely pass as coffee, in my book.

Marching back out, flinging a glare at Ella, who smiled back at me, I pressed the cup into Brigid's hands, conjuring up a smile.

"Here," I said, as softly as I could.

"Oh!" The sad thing? She wasn't even suspicious. You'd think she'd have learnt, by now, that I _really, really _don't like her, and her stupid walk "Thanks, Max!" She even smiled at me.

"Excuse me?" Iggy called. "Waiter? We're ready to order."

"Good for you," I yelled back, glad that there weren't any customers other than my little group of dear retards, and completely unwilling to miss Brigid's first sip of her 'coffee'.

"This is shocking," Sam said, disgusted. To my annoyance, Brigid set the coffee mug down on the table, craning her neck to see Sam. Can you even say nosey? I mean, God. They're just bitching about me, nothing new.

"I know," Ella agreed sadly. I ground my teeth audibly, trying to ignore Fang, who I knew was watching me.

"I think," Iggy said, "we should take up this rude worker's attitude with the manager."

"I'm coming!" I shouted, frustrated, at the same time Ella snorted:

"He's as gay as the fourth of July. Useless."

I resisted the urge to laugh, reluctantly turning away from the sickening couple, and their little baby mud cup, and stomping over to stand in front of their table with one hand on my hip.

"Ohmigod, Max, that apron is like so ugly it's like uglier than Lissa and you know how ugly she is and ugh it's like dirty too you should totally buy a designer one OHMIGOD I'll make you a designer apron with flowers and birds and it'll be like really pretty and I can make a business and earn millions and everything! What d'you think, Ella?" She turned to Ella excitedly, who just nodded, knowing Nudge wasn't really expecting an answer after one of her rants.

"Coke, please," Dylan cut in calmly, giving me one of those drop-dead gorgeous smiles that seem to light up his whole face. "Thanks, Max." I threw him a grateful smile, before turning to Iggy, who was conducting an imaginary orchestra of Pokemon... with his fork.

"Psyduck... uh... what do ducks do?" he asked me, noticing I was watching him with a worried expression. Please shoot me.

"Moo?" Ella offered.

"No, that's Brigid," Sam shook his head.

"Oh, yeah," she nodded. "Um... bark?"

"That's Lissa!" Nudge giggled.

"Meow?"

"Don't strain yourself, idiots," I rolled my eyes. "They quack. Duh."

Dylan laughed, and Iggy shot me daggers.

"I'll have the fanciest, most difficult thing to make drink on the menu," he said smugly.

"Good, 'cos I don't have to make it," I replied, sticking my tongue out. "Sammy?"

"Sammy?" he cocked an eyebrow, his smile amused.

"As in short for Samantha," I said, smiling sweetly.

"Shut it," he grinned. "Uh... Pepsi, please."

This obviously lead to a war of the Coke-drinkers versus the Pepsi-inhalers, during which I just walked away, clipped the ink-infested paper to the line, tugged it so the chef would see, and resumed my post, watching Brigid.

She pulled the cup up to her lips, under the gaze of Fang, parted her mouth, just a little... Instead of taking a ladylike sip, like Ella, she took a hearty gulp, smiling... before spitting it out all over Fang's hair. I'd say face, but seeing as it's covered with his ridiculous fringe, that'd be a lie.

I couldn't help it. Honest, I couldn't. I just burst out laughing. Loudly, as well.

"Oh... oh my God!" she snatched a napkin up and started dabbing at Fang like a demented chicken. "I'm so, so, so sorry! It's all that Max's fault!" As she said my name, she shot the dirtiest look she could, causing my laughter to double.

Fang was covered in slimy, brown gunk, and looked even more ridiculous than normal. He was smiling, though, as he grabbed a napkin from another table, and tried to wipe the stuff off himself. He only succeeded in getting it more and more ground in, though, and I couldn't help but laugh even harder at his frustrated expression.

"Hey, Max?" Dylan called me, from their table. I gazed up at him, tears in my eyes I'd been laughing so hard. "Do you have a moment? I, uh, want to, um, talk to you, if you have a moment, I mean."

He looked nervous, so I just nodded, guessing that the chef wasn't going to be moving from his spot any time soon. As he got up, he stumbled over the leg of his chair awkwardly, and ended up with his face in Iggy's nether regions. Oh, God. Please no perverse comments, Ig.

"Woah, tiger," he pulled Dylan up, grinning, "that can all wait 'till later."

"Ig, you're disgusting," I told him as Dylan walked over to me, cheeks burning. "You okay?" I asked him.

"I'm good," he said with a smile. "I was, uh, just wondering..." he trailed off, and I was suddenly very aware that both Ella and Fang were watching us surreptitiously. Nice friends, huh?

"What's up?" I asked lazily.

"I... uh..." he choked on his own words, looking at the floor and rubbing the back of his neck, before looking up at me again. "Will you... uh... will you... oh, man, um... will you go out with me?"

**A/N: CLIFFY! ;D Sorry, sorry, I'll try and get the next one up sooner, I KNOW this was way late. So, just to explain something:**

**Oh my wizard God/Pigfarts is from A Very Potter Musical/A Very Potter Sequel, the funniest thing _ever. _If you haven't watch it, get over to YouTube RIGHT NOW and watch it all. Both musicals. Or I'll hunt you down. I promise, you'll be crying with laughter at the end. Oh, and thanks to Joe Walker, you'll want to be a Death Eater. Trust me.**

**And if you have seen it, make sure you convince my non-helpful non-friend **Not Dumb. Dim Blonde **just how good it is. And while you're at it, check out her story Making Memories [yes, I'm promoting it _again_]. **

**So, anyway. Hope you liked it!**

**Review?**


	13. Chapter 13

**Disclaimer: I'm a girl. Self-explanatory. **

**A/N: Wow. I never even thought I'd reach 100 reviews, but 200? Wow. Shout-out to the lovely 200th reviewer, the lovely supermegafoxyawesomehot [AVPM joke, guys, ahah] HerGoldenWings, whose writing really is just amazing, so go check that out. Like, now.**

**So the Pikachu thing? I've had a _lot _of people asking about whether not she's a boy/girl, and telling me it's actually a boy, but IGGY'S Pikachu is definitely a girl. Ig might act gay, but Lily'd kick his ass if he really was, no matter how sweet she seems.**

**So, this chapter. It's a little different, but I've been waiting for the right time to do this, so if you have any confusion, review/PM me, and I'll try to explain whatever you found confusing. Don't flame, I know it's not strictly allowed, but honestly? If you like the story, you shouldn't really have a problem (:**

**Here we goooo...**

**[ x x x ] **

**Welcome to **Facebook.

**Email: **.com

**Password: **futureworldleaderdontforgetit

**Welcome, **Max Martinez.

**You have: **

1 Friend Request.

2 Messages.

1 Event Invitation.

**Friend Requests:**

Brigid Dwyer **would like to connect with you. **

**Accept **or **Ignore?**

**Ignore.**

**Currently online (3): **

Ella Martinez.

Iggy 'James' Griffiths.

Jamie Reed.

**Max says: **Ella? WTF are you doing online?

**Ella says: **Excuse me? What am I doing online? You're never online!

**Max says: **Well I am now, and you're using the connection up, so log off.

**Ella says: **No way!

**Max says: **What are you using, any way?

**Ella says: **Your laptop ;)

**Max says: **Just because I'm on the house computer doesn't give you permission to go on mine! Get off!

**Ella says: **Hey, what's this? 'Runaway'?

**Max says: **ELLA GET THE HELL OUTTA MY FILES.

**Ella says: **Neverrrrrr!

**Max says** I'll tell Iggy you had a crush on him all through kindergarten.

**Ella says: **I... I did not.

**Max says: **'Oh, Max, I don't know what to do... I really like him! But... but...'

**Ella says: **I did not say that!

**Max says: **'Dear diary, today Iggy gave me the last pencil crayon! I think it's love!'

**Ella says: **I... HOW DID YOU GET MY DIARY?

**Max says: **:)

**Ella says: **FINE. This conversation shall be continued later, I'm going out anyway :P Seen your status?

**Max says: **Victory is mine! Status?

**Ella says: **Ahahahahaha

Ella Martinez **is offline. **

**Your Profile. **

**Max Martinez**: omfg, Justin Bieber live! Someone take me, please! (L)(L)(L)(L) xxxxxx **[Last Sunday, 8:55pm]**

Ella Martinez **and **Monique 'Nudge' Littlewood **like this. **

1 **comment.**

**Valencia Martinez**: You wish, Ella.

**Fang Ride**: Girl, your profile's messed up.

**[Last Thursday, 5:40]**

Ella Martinez **likes this. **

**Max Martinez: **wants to marry Justin Bieber soooo much... I'm A Lonely Girl without himmm :'( (L) xxx

Ella Martinez, Monique 'Nudge' Littlewood and Iggy 'James' Griffiths **like this.**

2 **comments. **

**James 'Iggy' Griffiths: **So you finally came to your senses!

**Sam Owen: **You worry me.

**Max Martinez: **ily JB. xxxx

Ella Martinez, Monique 'Nudge' Littlewood, Iggy 'James' Griffiths and Dylan Bower **like this.**

**10 comments. **

**Fang Ride: **Uh... JB?

**Iggy 'James' Griffiths: **The Jonas Brothers, duh, Fang! Everyone knows they're, like, the greatest musicians of all time.

**Monique 'Nudge' Littlewood: **No no no! Zac Efron (L)

**Sam Owen: **Zefron's an actor?

**Dylan Bower: **Since when was he 'Zefron' and not Fairyboy, Sam?

**Ella Martinez: **Since I overheard him. Zefron = (L), don't argue. And guess again, it's not the fittest three brothers of all time.

**Iggy 'James' Griffiths: **I think you'll find the fittest three brothers of all time are me, Fang and the Gazmeister, actually ;)

**Ella Martinez: **You wish.

**Iggy 'James' Griffiths: **You make me cry. You really do. So who is it?

**Ella Martinez: **Max's one true love, duh. She's like, _obsessed_ with Justin Bieber :)

**View older posts? **

**No. **

**Currently online (4):**

Dylan Bower. [Idle]

Iggy 'James' Griffiths.

Jamie Reed.

Liam Downs.

**Iggy says: **I take it the only reason you're not talking to me is because you're talking to your one true love? :(

**Max says: **Excuse me?

**Iggy says: **I bet he's really offended you haven't changed your relationship status.

**Max says: **Excuse me?

**Iggy says: **Hmph.

**Max says: **For your information, JAMES, Dylan is idle.

**Iggy says: **We all knew that, Maximum.

**Max says: **You're not funny.

**Iggy says: **:P

**Max says: **Besides, you haven't changed YOUR relationship status.

**Iggy says: **Ah, but then Pikachu would get jealous.

**Max says: **Pikachu doesn't have Facebook.

**Iggy says: **Check your friend requests.

**Max says: **You're kidding me. No.

**Iggy says: **Do it or I'll hack you and declare your undying love...

**Max says: **For who?

**Iggy says: **Squirtle :)

**Max says: **WTF is a Squirtle?

**Iggy says:** LANGUAGE! I'M SCARRED!

**Max says: ***facepalm*

**You have: **1 new friend request.

Pikachu Ketchum **wants to connect with you. **

**Accept **or **Ignore?**

**Iggy says: **D'you see it? :D

**Max says: **Where's the go to hell button?

**Iggy says: **Are you trying to make her cry? Because she is.

**Max says: **This isn't funny. It's just sad.

**Iggy says: **Your _boyfriend _accepted.

**Max says: **To hell he did!

**Iggy says: **Mutual friends. Check. It. Out.

You **and **Pikachu **have **4 friends **in common: **

Dylan Bower.

Ella Martinez.

Iggy 'James' Griffiths.

Monique 'Nudge' Littlewood.

**Max says: **Me and him shall be having words.

**Iggy says: **Poor guy. I tried to tell him and everything!

**Max says: **Tried to tell him what?

**Iggy says: **That you're a psychopathic murderer - not girlfriend material :)

**Max says: **Go to hell. And take Pikachu with you.

**Iggy says: **That, Maximum, was completely unnecessary.

**Max says: **No, James, it was very much necessary. I can see you through my window, you know.

**Iggy says: **What? OH MY WIZARD GOD, I CAN SEE YOU.

**Max says: **No shit Sherlock.

**Iggy says: **MY EYES! MY EYES!

**Max says: **What?

**Iggy says: **Someone shut the curtains, this is painful!

**Max says: **You're dead.

**Iggy says: **Still breathing. :)

**Max says: **Not for much longer.

**Dylan says: **Max? Hey!

**Max says: **Ugh, Dyl! Couldn't you have stayed idle, for like, five more minutes?

**Dylan says: **Um, sorry? What's up?

**Max says: **I was just about to strangle Ig :)

**Dylan says: **Justifiable. What's he done now?

**Max says: **Um. Nothing.

**Dylan says: **Huh?

**Max says: **Never mind... you okay?

**Dylan says: **Okay, you're being nice. Something's seriously wrong.

**Max says: **Excuse me? Shouldn't you at least try to be nice to me?

**Dylan says: **:) Sorry.

**Max says: **Huh. You did ask me out, you know.

**Dylan says: **I know. Need to change relationship status, right?

**Max says: **What? Not bothered.

**Dylan says: **-facepalm-

**Max says: **What?

**Dylan says: **I read somewhere that girls get pissed off if you don't change your facebook status or whatever.

**Max says: **-facepalm-

**Dylan says: **I'll change it any way :)

**Max says: **Sure, whatever.

**Iggy says: **Max? Ma-ax? You were threatening to kill me?

**Max says: **Go away.

**Iggy says: **Oh, so that's how it is, is it? Ditch me for that idle git. I didn't do this with Pikachu, you know.

**Max says: **What part of GO AWAY don't you understand?

**Iggy says: **:P You haven't accepted Pikachu's friend request.

**Max says: **I'm still looking for the go to hell button. You can go with her.

**Iggy says: **That one's old.

**Max says: **Shut up.

**Dylan says: **I sent you a request. I think.

**Max says: **'Kay.

**You have:**

1 friend request.

2 messages.

1 event invitation.

1 relationship request.

**Relationship request:**

Dylan Bower **would like to be **in a relationship **with you. **

**Accept **or** ignore?**

**Accept. **

**Max says: **Accepted.

**Dylan says: **:)

**Event invitations:**

Jamie Reed **invited you to **Angel Range at The Irishmen (pub).

**Attending, not attending **or **not sure? **

**Not sure. **

**Event: **Angel Range at The Irishmen (pub).

**Info: **Be there or be square. Support spot open, message Jamie, Liam, Tom or Matt of Angel Range.

**Date: **8pm, The Irishmen, next Saturday.

**Currently attending: **112 people.

**Currently not attending: **7 people.

**Not sure: **17 people.

**Not replied: **24 people.

**Max says: **Jamie?

**Jamie says: **Ah, Max! Hey!

**Max says: **Hey. :) Ella added you, huh?

**Jamie says: **I'm guessing so. Nice statuses ;)

**Max says: **Oh yeah. Justin Bieber FTW.

**Jamie says: **lol sure. What's up?

**Max says: **Just wondering, that support spot still open?

**Jamie says: **You want it?

**Max says: **Not sure yet, have to speak to the guys, but probably.

**Jamie says: **Well Iggy and Dylan have already messaged me about it too, so as long as Sam's not busy, it's yours.

**Max says: **And they didn't tell me. Figures.

**Jamie says: **:)

**Max says: **Better go. Ella just got back in.

**Jamie says: **Ella?

**Max says: **My little sister. We have an argument to settle (as always).

**Jamie says: **Go kick her ass, girl!

**Max says: **Hey, Dyl? I'm going.

**Dylan says: **Alright, see you tomorrow?

**Max says: **Will do :)

**Max says: **I'm going to kick Ella's ass, then I'm coming to kick yours. Goodbye.

**Iggy says: **Scared.

**Max says: **And so you should be.

Max Martinez **is offline.**

**[ x x x ]**

**Welcome to **Facebook.

**Email: **.com

**Password: **notemojustverballychallenged

**Welcome, **Fang Ride (Nicholas Ride).

**You have: **

2 Friend Requests.

2 Messages.

1 Event Invitation.

1 Relationship request.

**Friend Requests:**

Brigid Dwyer **would like to connect with you. **

**Accept **or **Ignore?**

**Accept.**

Pikachu Ketchum **would like to connect with you.**

**Accept **or **Ignore?**

**Accept. **

**Currently online (3): **

Ella Martinez.

Jamie Reed.

Monique 'Nudge' Littlewood.

**Ella says: **Fang?

**Fang says: **Mm?

**Ella says: **Are you going out with Brigid?

**Fang says: **Why?

**Ella says: **You sure act like it.

**Fang says: **?

**Ella says: **So are you?

**Fang says: **No.

**Ella says: **Oh.

**Fang says: **Yeah.

**Ella says: **You like her?

**Fang says: **She's clever.

**Ella says: **Yeah, but that's not answering my question, is it?

**Fang says: **You're so Max's sister.

**Ella says: **No need to insult me, what did I ever do to you? Anyway. You like Brigid, or not?

**Fang says: **Why?

**Ella says: **Because Max misses you already and I know you miss her too, but if you like Brigid, then she'll never be friends with you again because she's an over-dramatic bird-brained twit.

**Fang says: **Nudge moment.

**Ella says: **So? You like her, or not?

**Fang says: **How'd you know I miss Max?

**Ella says: **You practically ran out of the café when Dylan hugged her. Duh.

**Fang says: **No.

**Ella says: **No what?

**Fang says: **I don't like Brigid.

**Appear offline?**

**Yes. **

Max Martinez's **profile. **

Max Martinez **is in a relationship with **Dylan Bower.

Ella Martinez, Dylan Bower,Pikachu Ketchum **and **Lily Green **like this. **

**Max Martinez: **really needs to change her password. OWNED BY THE IGMEISTER!

**[2 hours ago]**

13 **comments.**

**Ella Martinez:** :/

**Iggy 'James' Griffiths: **What? Aren't I awesome? #:) It has hair!  
**Ella Martinez:** -facepalm-

**Iggy 'James' Griffiths: **#:)

**Ella Martinez: **I'm the only one who can hack Max. Ever.

**Iggy 'James' Griffiths: **Pikachu thinks I'm cooler than you.

**Ella Martinez: **Pikachu can go to hell.

**Iggy 'James' Griffiths: **WTF? Max, is that you? Have you mastered the art of hacking? Oh god.

**Ella Martinez: **No... it's Ella. Obviously. You hacked Max...

**Iggy 'James' Griffiths: **That sounds really dirty.

**Valencia Martinez: **Okay, kids, let's keep this U-rated, thank you very much.

**Ella Martinez: **I blame Iggy.

**Your profile. **

**Fang Ride: **Go to hell, **Max Martinez.**

**[2 weeks ago, 8:02pm]**

Ella Martinez **likes this.**

10 **comments.**

**Iggy 'James' Griffiths: **What's she done now? And Ella, you like this because?

**Ella Martinez: **She shredded his math homework. And because I want to.

**Iggy 'James' Griffiths: **By accident? And why?

**Ella Martinez: **What do you think? God, what is this, the Spanish Interrogation? Because I WANT TO.

**Iggy 'James' Griffiths: **You stole that line off Max. And okay.

**Fang Ride: **Stop flirting on my profile.

**Ella Martinez: **FLIRTING?

**Iggy 'James' Griffiths: **I have a girlfriend, dude, as if. -.-

**Ella Martinez: **2. And I'm really close to getting a boyfriend.

**Iggy 'James' Griffiths: **So take that, emo dude!

**Fang Ride: **just reached Level 45 in Farmville!

**[3 weeks ago]**

1 **comment. **

**Max Martinez: **And we wonder why you're emo...

**Max Martinez: **Go to hell. And take Ig. And Pikachu.

**[3 weeks ago]**

2 **comments.**

**Fang Ride: **?

**Max Martinez: **Erm... I can't remember.

**View older posts? **

**No.**

**Display picture. **

**In this picture: **Fang Ride, Max Martinez, Iggy 'James' Griffiths, Pikachu Ketchum, Ella Martinez, Monique 'Nudge' Littlewood.

**Ella Martinez: **Who the hell tagged that electrocuted rat? And why is it appearing before ME?

**Monique 'Nudge' Littlewood: **And me!

**Iggy 'James' Griffiths: **I did, and she's cooler than all of you, so WAY.

**Fang Ride: **Not on my profile.

**Ella Martinez: **Sorry.

**Are you sure you want to delete this picture?**

**Yes, **or **No?**

**No. **

**Fang Ride: **I'm sorry Max.

**Post this as your new status? **

**Yes, **or **no?**

**No. **

**Log off?**

**Yes, **or **no?**

**Yes. **

**A/N: So it's the shortest chapter I've written, but all that bolding SERIOUSLY did my head in -.- It's different, I know, but it took me a while, and... well, let me know what you think. Feedback would make all that freakin' bolding worthwhile! ^-^ **

**Oh, and you WILL get to know their immediate reactions to the Dylan question! Don't worry.**

**Review?**


	14. Chapter 14

**Disclaimer: Girl. Man. Difference. **

**A/N: So the facebook thing went down well, I'm guessing, from the mainly positive reviews? Thank God there's no bolding in this chapter, I'm bolded out... ahahahaha. Sorry, I found that oddly amusing. **

**Fang: -facepalm-**

**Me: Go get back in your emo corner. Emo.**

**Uh, anyway... Thank you so much for all the response, be it reviews, faves, or alerts, as always. Make my day. ^-^ Reasons for lateness in the lower A/N - this bold's annoying me already (;**

**Here we go~**

Poke. Poke. Poke.

Nothing.

Poke. Poke. Poke.

Nothing.

Poke. Poke. Poke.

Nothing.

Poke. Poke-

"Oh for crying out loud, Ella," I finally turned to her, glaring. "_What?" _

She grinned, "Took you long enough. You can't be that tired!"

"Oh, really?" I shot her daggers (not literally, you psychopaths). "It's Monday morning, El. And, just a heads up, if you poke me one more time I'm gonna bend your finger back and break it right off."

Naturally, she didn't get the Paramore reference. Well, I am talking to the Justin Bieber addict... remind me why she's _my _sister?

"Still," she argued. "_I'm _not tired."

"Yeah? Well some of us have to be _at work _before eight. In the morning."

"That must be awful," she laughed at me. Grr.

"What do you want?" I ran a hand through my inevitably tangled hair. Ella's was perfectly smooth and straight, the result of at least an hour hogging the bathroom. She might be getting more and more sarcastically brilliant every day, but the girl still can't tear herself from the mirror for more than five minutes in the morning. I swear, even if me and Mum were, like, constipated, she still wouldn't let us in. Oh, ew. Bad mental images... I just had to think constipated.

"You," she poked me again, this time on the cheek, "need to make up with Fang."

"I warned you," I said as I shoved her hard enough to make her stumble, messing up her hair as she tried to recover her balance. "You poked me. Bad girl, bad hair."

"You're truly evil," she growled, trying to fix her hair back in place, and failing epically. It was quite amusing to watch, really.

"Yup," I smiled absent-mindedly. "I know."

She glared at me, still fumbling around with her hair, even though she knew it was hopeless (I'm somewhat of a master at messing up hair. Blame Ella and Nudge for being the perfect candidates. Yeah, it's all their fault), "That's not a compliment."

"Might as well be," Iggy said, appearing from behind us to lean on my shoulder, only to be thrown off and elbowed in the gut. "God, that hurt."

"Good," I replied, reaching up to slap him lightly on the cheek, smiling slightly.

"Don't strain yourself, shorty," he grinned, winking at a laughing Ella. I turned on her, glaring again as I ensured Ig wouldn't be able to move in PE today.

"What?" she giggled. "You _are _short."

"I am not," I argued, folding my arms as we walked. "I'm just... untall." This naturally caused another eruption of laughter, and bending down (and consequently being smacked over the head), so I decided to move the conversation on a little. "Why the hell are you walking with us, anyway? This our time away from you, Ig."

He tried to sling an arm around my shoulders, resulting in an elbow in the armpit. He really should know better by now. I was expecting tears (why not?), but he just grimaced, and said, "You pain me. Pikachu shall be having words with you."

"Any words Pikachu have with me will be her last."

"She's crying right now because you said that."

"Good."

"You don't mean that," he huffed, shoving me forwards a little.

"Oh, believe me," Ella piped up, "she does."

I pointed at her, "Exactly."

"Hmph." Iggy stormed off towards where the school gates were slowly materialising.

"Good riddance," I called after him, moving back to Ella's side, rolling my eyes.

"Sod him," she said, sounding more like me than I was completely comfortable with. "So, Fang."

"What about him?" I asked flippantly.

"He misses you," she said in a stupid voice, dragging out the i, as Iggy came marching back to us, munching a packet of Red Vines like nothing had happened.

"Who misses who?" he asked, falling back into step between us again. Sending Ella a bewildered look, I had a very tough decision to make: elbow, knee, kick, or slap? In the end, I chose kick, and slammed my foot into the back of his knee, sending him staggering a few feet forward.

"And that was deserved," Ella said, with a giggle that was nothing like me.

"Pikachu hates you," he told us with a glare. And this was meant to be an insult...?

"Okay," Ella replied, smiling sweetly. "I can live with that."

"Lies! LIES!" Iggy ran off, straight into the iron fence surrounding our school.

So I should be thinking sweet thoughts for my best friend (that I hate), feeling sorry for him, wanting to help... but holy shit that was freakin' hilarious.

"Ig!" someone shouted from the other side of the road. Glancing over, I saw that it was Lily, eyes on Ig with a mixture of humour and worry.

"I got him," someone _else_ called from the gates, already moving quickly towards Ig. Fang. Ugh, really? Not on a Monday morning, please. Or any other morning. I'm not trying to be Monday-ist, honest.

"I... I see stars..." Iggy moaned as Fang grabbed him roughly under the elbows and lifted him easily to his feet. Hmm. He really is strong. That's irritating. "Tell... Pikachu... I... I loved her..."

"Oh, thanks," Lily said, smiling despite herself, reaching Ig at the same time we did. "Are you okay?"

"Obviously not," Ig said in a tone that said much to the contrary. "I'm just... giving my final words..."

I rolled my eyes, "More like a final speech, you igiot."

"Max?" his eyes widened, and his hands clamped around one of mine. "I... have always... hated... you..."

Concussion or not, he was going to get a serious beating, right about-

"Me too," Ella said with a smile in my direction, before turning back to Iggy, cutting off my murder plans. "Is anyone in his homeroom?"

"No," Fang said, quietly as always. God, would it really kill the kid to speak something at, like, a _normal _volume? And get a decent hair cut. With his fringe and Brigid's walk, they make a real perfect couple. Yeah.

"I'll walk him," Lily offered, leaning against his side a little. Aww. She actually cares about him - unlike the rest of us. "I don't mind being late."

"Yeah," Ella smiled at her, though it wasn't a normal Ella smile (don't ask me what a normal Ella smile actually is, because I really don't know. It's Monday morning, leave me alone). "I have to go. Max, you coming?"

All eyes shifted to me. Wow, wasn't that dramatic-sounding? Including Mr Talkalot, who was leaning against the fence behind Ig and Lil, looking bored, and being silent - no difference there then.

"Nah," I replied, giving everyone a weird look at the same time (it's a talent). "I said I'd meet Dyl."

"It must be true love," Ig said with a grin that disappeared as I slapped him over the shoulder as I passed him. "What's with all the needless violence today?"

"Your face," I yelled back, prompting a giggle from Ella again, who, unnoticed by me, was strolling at my side once again.

"He's not going out with Brigid," she said, referring to Fang oh-so-subtly.

"Sure," I said easily, wondering whether or not I'd get arrested for assault if I broke her nose. I mean, we are (unfortunately) related - that has to count for something, right? Oh yeah, I forgot, of course it does - it means she's allowed to get me crappy jobs and claim that the non-existent dog ate the last chocolate chip cookie (she knows they're my favourite and all).

"No, really, he's not!" Sigh. I should slap her just for being so damn awake on a Monday morning. Then again, _some _people get a Sunday morning lie-in in preparation. Yeah, some people that don't have to work at ridiculous times.

"Are you freaking joking?" So I'm in a bad mood. Again. Sue me. Actually, please don't, I have nothing but my company to give (which is pretty damn awesome, if I do say so myself).

"No, I'm regular joking," she replied with an Iggy-like grin.

"Is that meant to be funny?" Actually, it kind of was, but... oh, shut up.

"Yup," she swung her bag so it bumped me on the hip gently. "Igiot."

"Hey," I pointed my index finger at her, frowning. "You can't use my own fantastically awesome insults on me. It's illegal."

"Oh, my God," she looked at me with wide eyes. Maybe she's just realised she's insulting the future world leader. 'Bout time. "Was that more than _five _syllables?"

I slapped her, hard, but I was smiling. She really is my sister. Why, me, God? I can just imagine him leaning down from heaven, with shades and stupid bling, all, 'Why not?' Then jumping into a cover of Eminem.

Oh, wait, no, that was that dream I had after watching Bruce Almighty.

Well, this is awkward.

"I really don't like you."

"I know."

"I really do."

"I know."

"Actually, no, I intensely dislike you."

"I know."

"I'd even say it's bordering on hate." I stopped at a vending machine to grab two cans of Coke. Two dollars? That is absolutely ridiculous. In fact, I think I'm going to do my entire English debate on the unfairness of that. I mean, some people are on a working salary! God.

Not to mention Mum cut my pocket money last month after I decked the next-door neighbour (nah, not Iggy. She's not bothered when I deck him). Look, he called me a gnome. 'Nuff said.

"Yup," she tried to swipe one of the cans.

I yanked my arm in, holding the can to my chest, "Excuse me? Some of us actually work for these privileges. Piss off."

"Charming!" she grumbled as we set off down the corridors again, this time heading for the canteen, where I knew Dylan would be sat waiting. "Remind me what Simon's paying you?"

"Enough for at least two things of lipstick." So I don't know what they come in. So what? Hey, I sound like Pink! I could totally make a career as a Pink impersonator, don't you think? I do.

"What, really?" Please tell me she's joking.

"No freakin' duh."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

See? Sisterly understanding. My _sister understands _that if she doesn't shut up, I'm going to beat her to death with my cans. And no, I didn't mean that to sound dodgy. Promise. On Ella's life.

Upon entering the canteen, I immediately clock Dyl, and a certain Igiot.

"What the hell are you doing here?"

"Was that aimed at me?" Dylan asked confusedly, glancing at me, then the Igiot, then back to me. "Because we said we'd meet here last night, right?"

Cue facepalm.

Yes, it deserved a whole new paragraph.

"Go away, Iggy," Ella said tiredly. "I thought Lily was taking you to homeroom?"

She sank down a couple of seats away from Dylan, glaring at Iggy.

"Well, she didn't," he grinned, completely oblivious to Ella's suddenly black mood.

"Why not?"

"Because I wanted to come meet my _bestest _friend ever!" he said with a flourish. Oh dear God. I actually feel sorry for him. That is how scary Ella's wrath is. Not that I can't crush her like a bug, but hey. I'd never crush a bug, though. That's just plain mean.

"Yeah, well, your bestest friend ever obviously doesn't want to meet you," Ella replied. I really have to teach her some decent comebacks. I mean, God, that was just shockingly bad.

"She's already met me?" Typically, Ig was confused. Do I interfere? Nah, I'll just take my own seat next to Dyl.

"Oh, shut the hell up Ig!" Ella yelled at him, glaring hugely.

Face-check!

Me: :)

Dylan: '.'

Iggy: :O

Ella: :

"What? I've not done nothing!" Oh no. Iggy was getting defensive now. Let's just hope he doesn't have a bomb on him at this moment in time. I swear, I've told him a million times, blowing up the canteen does _not _make him attractive, but he just smiles that stupid smile and does it anyway.

"Double negative," Dylan mouthed at me. I grinned, and nodded, though I was slightly worried for... well... everyone's safety. Did I say everyone? I mean me.

"You're so..." Ella paused, looking for an original, creative insult that he'd never have heard before. "You're such a butt trumpet!" Or that.

"Excuse me?" For once in my life, I actually can't blame Ig for sounding confused and shocked. I mean, butt trumpet. Ouch.

"Yeah, you heard me!" Ella wasn't even bothered by the wind going through the room, making her hair that much worse. Hmm. I've been outdone than wind - I'll have to practice. "You're just a butt trumpet!"

Okay, people were beginning to stare now, including Ella's boyfriend to-be, so I should probably tell them they're making absolute Igiots of themselves. Before they become the retards of the school (I mean, that wouldn't be any change for Ig, but Ella's strangely popular. It's the make-up).

I would be a crappy sister/best friend if I didn't. I really, really should.

Nah. It's way too entertaining.

"That's absurd!" Iggy looked absolutely bewildered. It was hilarious.

"You're absurd!" Oh no she di'nt.

"Come say that to my face!" They're definitely staring now, if they weren't before. No, they were staring before, they were just trying to look like they weren't, if you know what I mean, but now they're just gazing openly. God, people these days! Can't two retards have a retarded argument in an open area these days?

"YOU'RE ABSURD!"

"That's absurd!"

Note of advice from the master (yes, that's me): never argue with an Igiot. They drag you down and beat you with experience. Never argue with me either, I'll drag you down to my level (still not short!) and beat you with a bat. Or anything else that can be used as, you know, a weapon of death. With me, do not rule out anything. In kindergarten, I was sent home for stabbing someone in the hand with a blunt pencil. I mean, God, there wasn't even any blood.

"Hi, guys!" Piss off, Brigid. She came walking over with that stupid little walk of hers, giving us a fifty watt smile, even though we all knew she was pissed that Fang hadn't walked with her this morning. Ha. Take that, Dr Stupendous. If she's such a stupendous damn doctor, why can't she fix her walk, huh? HUH? Ha.

"Hey, Brigid! Can I borrow your pen?" I conjured up a smile, and even Ella and Iggy turned to look at me, surprised. "I need to stab you in the eye."

Needless to say, she got the message and stalked off. I know, I'm a genius, I really am.

"You just keep trumpetting out of your butt," Ella re-started the argument with a cracker. It was stupid, but... oh, why do I have to keep up the running commentary here? Why not Dylan? Though, actually, he looked a bit worried. I think it's the fighting. Dyl's weird like that.

"Excuse me, uh, Ella?" Ella's boyfriend to-be stepped up to her sheepishly, with his hands in his pockets. He really does tower over her. Is he training to be a sky-scraper, or something?

"Oh, hi, Dan!" Ella turned from murderous to perky in a split-second, cheeks flushing bright red. See, that's where we seriously differ. I'd have turned round and knocked the guy out.

"Hey," he repeated. You're onto a winner here, El. "I, uh, just wanted to say... don't bother texting me tonight. Or any night. Uh, unless I text you first, but, uh, I probably won't."

Oh my God. Fights to the death, and now he was dumping her? Though he wasn't _really _dumping her, seeing as they'd never been together, but you know what I mean. This could be the next episode of that stupid Glee show - it really could, I mean, they're retards too!

"Are you sure?" Ella asked in a small voice. Iggy looked a little lost now, and definitely worried, running a hand through his hair in a perplexed manner.

"I'm sure," he said in his ridiculously deep voice before turning away and moving into the crowd that were now leaving the canteen, since the bell had just rung. Ella just stood there for a moment, shell-shocked. I'd put my arm around her, but she'd probably think I was trying to strangle her (we've been down that road before. Many times). Me and Dylan exchanged a pure WTF look, then smiled at one another when we realised we were thinking exactly the same thing. I know you're all 'aww-ing' now. Quit it.

"Ella, I..." Iggy tried to place a comforting hand on her shoulder, but she jerked backwards, out of reach.

"Whatever, Iggy," she said in a hollow voice before nodding at me and Dyl, and slipping out of the canteen doors. Told you she was a drama queen.

"What did I do?" Iggy asked pitifully as Dyl and I stood up.

"You existed," I winked as Dyl extended a hand towards me. Grinning at him, I placed a can in his outstretched palm. He laughed, slinging an arm round my shoulders.

"What should I do?"

"Die," I replied with a smile, shaking his arm off me. "No, but seriously, just leave her alone. Unless you're planning to let her kill you. In which case, I'd be happy to do it in her place right now."

"Ugh," Iggy groaned, more serious than I'd seen him for a while. "Girls!"

I winked at him, "Yeah, we're pretty damn freakin' awesome, huh?"

**A/N: (: It's a LITTLE shorter than my usual chapters, but I'm writing like hell right now to get out a good few chapters before I go on holiday on Monday [I say Monday, but I won't be online on Sunday either, 'cos I'm going to my lovely cousin's place before catching the ferry to FRANCE, the land of frogs], so my lovely little non-friend can hack me, and post chapters for you lovely little people while I'm gone. **

**If you skim-read that entire paragraph, I'm basically going on holiday, and letting **Sara, a.k.a. Not Dumb. Dim Blonde **post some chapters while I'm gone! **

**I'mma be gone for 2 weeks, and I get back the night before Leeds Fest, so getting up for that should be interesting ahaha. **

**A lot of AVPS/M humour, review if you got any of it! Ahaha, THAT'S ABSURD! (; **

**Lateness excuse - I've been really ill. Honest, like, throwing up, not being to sleep at all or sleeping for hours at inappropriate times, all that crap. I'm sorry! **

**Sorry for not replying for reviews for that last chapter, I'll reply any I get when I'm away once I'm back, swear. On Fang's life. **

**Fang: D:**

**Me: :D**

**So... well, I'll see you all in a couple of weeks! Be nice to SAR (; And, uh... make my inbox bursting with those lovely little emails from FFnet when I get back home! Love you all!**

**Reviewwwwwwww? (:**


	15. Chapter 15

**Heyy! Two A/N's today.**

**Mo (child slave): I'm leaving my **_**trusted **_**friend Sara to update**** because I'm going to France for two weeks and then going to the Leeds Fest! ********Thank for reviews (:**

**Sara: Mua ha ha ha haaaa! I hold her password :D This is an awesome chapter made me laugh! Anyway. You can all call Paramoll Mo or Child Slave from now on. She loves them nick names. Isn't she an awesome writer? I think she is. She's in love with Fang! She thinks she owns him! Also read her one shot that should be changed into a story! Oh and if she ever says that she made (:# that up she lies! I did! It has hair for goodness sakes! As if Mo could come up with that! (:#**

**Disclaimer~ Me and Mo do not own (rhymes (kinda)) MR. She owns the ideas. I own her password #:D.**

**Have fun reading this AMAZING chapter! **

Later that day, I walked the corridors to math alone, though I could sense Fang's presence behind me. Wow, that makes me sound cool, like some kind of secret agent. I could totally be a Gallagher girl, you know. Except I'd have to reinvent the uniforms to something completely awesome - jeans and a t-shirt. Yup, that works.

He was just lurking behind me, like some lurking thing on lurking pills and... well, you get the point.

So, naturally, I turned around, and glared at him, "Are you stalking me?"

He sent me a bewildered look, "I'm in your math class."

"Oh. Right. Okay." Damn him and his infallible logic. I hate logic, I really do. What's the point? Honestly, a world without logic would be a much happier place.

"So..." Oh my God, he's turning into Dylan.

"So you're dating Brigid," I said darkly, falling back to walk beside him.

"No," he replied just as flippantly, glancing at me out of the corner of the one eye that wasn't hidden beneath his fringe marking him as an emo for all eternity. I swear to God, I'm going to cut it off one day. Or get people to do it for me, because I'm not touching that thing - it's so depressing it'll make me want to cut myself, I'm sure of it.

"Sure seems like it," I nodded, refusing to look at him.

"Assuming will make an ass of you and me," he said, possibly the longest thing I'd ever heard him say without taking a breath.

"Excuse me?" I broke my own rule and turned to him, hands on my hips, bag swinging brokenly from one arm. "You're the ass here, not me."

We just looked at each other for a few minutes, my eyes blazing with emotion (I was listening in English earlier, for once), his carefully devoid of any feeling, before he said gruffly, "Sorry."

"Oh, so it _was _your fault after all?" I said, trying to make him feel as bad as possible. Hey, he deserves it! Let's just call it my new game: Emo Squirm. It's more popular than Monopoly. I hate Monopoly though - Ella says I'm not allowed to take out loans from the bank and then not pay them back, which is just ridiculous.

Fang just shrugs, and I know he's trying to ignore me, but not a chance, emo, you _will _squirm.

"So you were a real arse, huh?"

Shrug.

"Really stupid?"

Shrug.

"Made the wrong decisions?"

Shrug.

"Feel really sorry?"

Shrug.

"Want to make it up by buying me the new Midnight Beast song?"

Shr- "No."

"Dammit."

He turned to give me one of those half-smiles I'd missed a lot more than I'd realised. "Spanish interrogation, huh?"

"Nah," he opened the door to math, holding it for me. Gentleman Fang strikes again! Ha, I made him sound like a terrorist. Not that I'm terrorist-ist or anything, but you know... LOL. "Just clearing some stuff up, Batfang."

**[ X X X ]**

"No."

"But it suits you so well!"

"No."

"Ugh, but-"

"No."

"Too bad, Batfang."

"I'm not talking to you."

"You don't talk to anyone, so I could care more."

"I hate you."

"You wish you could."

Me and Fang strode into the crowded canteen where the guys were waiting for me, Dyl, Ig, Sam, Nudge and Lily. Ella wasn't there, and a quick scan of the canteen told me she wasn't in the room - I knew better than to go comfort her. It does not go well. Naturally, Fang and I were arguing - hey, it's the base of our entire friendship, if you can even call it that. To say the guys were surprised to see us together again would be an understatement: Nudge choked on her coke, Iggy fell off his chair, and Sam burst out laughing.

Why would I not be surprised if the last two things in that list were very closely related? I hate my friends.

"THAT WAS UNCALLED FOR!" Iggy bellowed at Sam, probably because he was already sore from my beating of him earlier. And, for the second time today, and probably the hundredth time if we're including all our time here (don't tell Ella, she'll want to throw a party... actually, in this state, she won't. Thank God), everyone turned to stare at us, some of them even laughing.

Sam was absolutely beside himself with laughter, tears beginning to clot at the corners of his eyes. Oh God, it's infectious - there goes Nudge, and, surprisingly, Dylan. Me and Fang haven't even reached the table yet, we're just sort of stood, halfway there, gazing at them as they all burst out laughing. Glancing at Fang, I caught his eye, and that was it. We were gone.

They're laughing because we're retards; we're laughing because they just figured it out.

"This is not a laughing matter!" Ig yelled again, picking himself up from the floor as me and Fang slid into our seats. "I could've been seriously hurt!"

"I'm... sorry..." Lily gasped between giggles, pushing the chair that had been pulled out of place back next to hers.

"That," I said, turning to Sam once we'd all calmed down a little, "was pure genius."

He winked, "I have my moments."

I considered for a moment, watching Fang out of the corner of my eye, before coming to a decision. "Want to join my army?"

"Sure," he replied, and we high-fived.

"Now, the rules are complicated, but I'll get Legolas to teach you the more advanced stuff, okay?" He nodded, but I wasn't really watching him. I was already in the world of army-planning, wondering if I could bribe Katniss (Everdeen, she's taught me half my killing technique. That girl is awesome. I was going to say the definition of cool, but that's me, much like Ig's the definition of idiot) into taking on his duties as well. Of course, she'd have to work extra, so I'd then have to have a word with Sam and Grace to see if they could babysit Prim that night.

God, this army stuff is hard work, you know.

And real.

Totally real.

"That's not fair," Fang protested quietly. "I was going to ask him."

Nine words from Mr Talkalot! He really is annoyed. Just wait 'till he hits ten - the world will spontaneously explode, I'm convinced.

"Too bad," I stuck my tongue at him, turning back to Sam. "Okay, so, number one, you have to be prepared to bitch about Fang."

"Are you freaking joking?" Fang wanted to know.

"No, I'm regular joking," I said with a totally straight face. See, one of the advantages of not having El around is that I can steal her jokes without her claiming it, and making me look like an igiot. Unfortunately, it also means we have to put up with Nudge talking in Nudge-world to us all. Actually, Lily's doing a pretty good job.

"So like we all went to the pool and it was awesome and the sun was out don't you like the sun? It's like a ball of fire I don't like fire it's hot and scary but balls are really fun to throw and kick around you know do you like football? Iggy does but Iggy's weird and you might have to watch lots of games which sucks unlike McDonald's apple pie do you like apples? They're nice fruits nice and round and juicy and nice don't you think?"

Lily just smiled and nodded. Impressive for a girl who's dating the resident igiot.

"That's not funny," Fang said, shaking his head disappointedly, though I saw his lips spasm.

"It is!" I protested. "Sam and Dyl think it's funny!"

"We do?" Sam sounded surprised, but a quick elbow reminding him who his world leader was changed his tone instantly. "I mean, we do!"

"You do what?" No, Ig, go help your girlfriend out. Don't get interested, please. "Hey, that sounded dodgy!" The worrying thing? He sounded pleased with himself. Sigh. We shall be having words. Possibly his last.

I leaned backwards into Dylan's chest and whispered into his ear, "You think I'm the funniest human being to ever walk the planet."

"We think she's the sunniest cumin bean to ever walk on Janet," Dyl said confusedly to much laughter and facepalming.

"Nice," Sam appraised, rolling his eyes.

"One question..." Iggy asked thoughtfully, which is definitely a reason for distress, because Ig never thinks, and if he ever does, it's normally about how much gunpowder it takes to blow up various structures (I've banned him from wearing anything with pockets in my room. No joke. "Who's Janet, and why the hell do you walk on her?"

F. A. C. E. P. A. L. M.

"Ig," Lily smiled, "you're an idiot."

"Igiot," I corrected with a wink.

"OH MY GOD!" Run for your lives: Nudge is having a moment. Scary enough by itself, but this time there's no Ella to shut her up. Or take the main heat. "I completely forgot! You all know it's Christmas soon, right? Mum said I could throw a party! On the twenty-third, so you all have to come! My cousin's coming, too, 'cos her mum's thinking about moving here!"

I don't know which was more shocking: that we'd actually been invited to a party, or that Nudge had spoken six whole sentences with punctuation. I think it was definitely leaning towards the Nudge thing. Our shock, I mean, not that it can lean or anything, but... go away. No. Just go.

"Twenty-third..." Dylan tilted his head to one side, thinking. "Yeah, I can make it. Max?"

"Uh?" And people say I'm not elegant.

"Can you make it?" he said with a smile.

"Dunno." So eloquent.

"Ella already said you guys could come!" Nudge said perkily. Oh, thanks, sis. "Fang, Ig?"

They both just shrugged (surprising for Ig, not so much for Fang), so she turned to Sam with a questioning look.

"I'll check," he said. "Can I invite Amber?"

Nudge looked absolutely _delighted _at the idea of another guest: "Oh my God, sure! Lily?"

"Um, I'll ask my mum," she said with a smile, "but I might have to bring my little sister... she's in your year..."

For once in her life, Nudge put two and two together and actually came up with four (I'm ashamed to say I honestly believed the answer was three in kindergarten, and spent thirty minutes arguing about it with my teacher, before kicking her in the shin and becoming the first six year-old to be suspended for being 'overly violent', for both that and the pencil stabbing incident. What can I say? I was bad-ass). I mean, she actually realised what Lily was talking about, and got it right (surprising for Nudge, since, though she's pretty cute, she's not the chocolatiest biscuit in the tin, if you know what I mean.

"Skye is your sister?" she asked, all wide-eyed.

Lily smiled, "You know her? She doesn't really talk about her friends much..." her expression was troubled, but it cleared when Ig said:

"Neither does Fang," with a disappointed shake of his head in Fang's direction, who just rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, I know her! She's so..." Nudge trailed off, obviously searching for the right word for the first time in her life. What? The girl has an excellent grasp of the English language: she has to, to speak that much. "Talented!"

Lily nodded emphatically, "Yeah, she's always practising everything! I love her, though."

"So, the twenty-third?" I confirmed as the bell went again.

"Yup!" Nudge stood up, eyes searching for Ella, like we all were, 'cos, though I might hate to admit it, I am kind of worried about her. Sure, she can fend for herself, but she was really upset earlier, and none of us have had a chance to talk to her, not even Nudge.

"See you later," I said to Dylan, who smiled and nodded, knowing if he tried to hug me, he'd get hit, boyfriend or not.

**[ X X X ]**

"You want to come round tonight?" Fang asked as we walked home together. Neither Ella or Ig were with us, since we'd waited forty minutes to see if Ella came out (she didn't), and... we don't like Iggy. 'Nuff said.

"Dunno," I shrugged. "I'll check on Ella, if she's home, then if she's not too bad, I have a few new torture techniques."

"For me?"

"Iggy. Duh."

"Oh."

"Obviously."

"By the way," he cut off the conversation (because he was losing). "I claimed the Chipmunks."

"What, those rats on drugs?" I was shocked. Honestly.

"Yup," he chuckled.

"Then I claim the girl things." I said victoriously.

"They're practically the same," he sent me a strange look I could only half see through his stupid fringe. Oh my God, I have a new Christmas game! Cut The Fringe! Creative, no? Remind me to suggest that to Nudge. Actually, no, remind me to _force _Nudge into including that.

"Yeah," I conceded, "but everyone knows girls are better than boys. Common knowledge, Batfang."

He shot me a dark glare. "I claim Spiderman."

"I have Batman," I replied with a grin. "Dude, he can fly!"

"...Touché."

"I also claim Robin!"

"Mr Incredible," he countered. I threw him a WTF look. Aww, Batfang's a fan of Disney! I bet he's a real Zefron fan. "What? Angel."

"Of course," I said with a smile.

"Honestly!" he threw his hands up as if surrendering.

"Okay, okay," I grinned. "So, tell me..." He raised an eyebrow questioningly... at least, I think he did, I could hardly see it past that horrible jungle of hair he thinks is cool (I think he consulted Iggy. Igiot). "How is Zac Efron these days? Still, uh, dancing on?"

He glared daggers at me. "Right, that's it," and then he shoved me. I mean, as in, _shoved me. _Properly shoved me. An italic-deserving, capitalised SHOVE.

So I did the natural thing and shoved him right back, straight into some randomer's front garden.

"Didn't you know? It's considered rude to kill flowers," I told him, smirking.

"Treehugger," he muttered once he'd extracted himself from the rose bush (I know. I didn't even plan it. Mother Nature loves me) and we were walking back down the pavement.

I raised an eyebrow, "What was that, Batfang?"

"Quit calling me that."

"Never!"

"What was that?" he mimicked. "Forever? Gee, thanks, Max." And then he pushed me. _Again._ Does he have a death wish? God.

And, once again, I pushed him back, sending him flying this time as he stumbled over a crack in the pavement. He landed with a thud on the ground, and I moved to stand in front of him, waiting for him to get up. But he didn't.

"Batfang?" Nothing. "Common, stop pulling an Ig and let's get outta here." Nothing. "Batfa-ang." Nothing. And I was practically singing. Unappreciative much? "Look, your Iggy impression is very impressive, okay? Come on." Nothing. Funny that. "Pavement hugger." Nothing.

Okay, that was when I began to get a _little _bit worried. I mean, he'd hit the ground pretty hard. That thump was pretty freakin' audible, goddammit. And there you have it, my attempt at being a western gangster. Awesome, huh?

So I knelt down next to Batfang (every time I call him that I almost laugh. I'm so creative. It's just pure brilliance, really. I mean, Batfang? God. I'm amazing. I really am. And so modest), knotted my fingers in his hair (which was surprisingly clean and free of grease. Thank God he's not going down the Iggy route of life i.e. uncleanness), and yanked his head up.

"Batfang?" his eyes were closed, but I swear, I saw his lips move. So I slapped him.

"Holy crap!" his eyes flew open, his hand moving to rub his red jaw.

"Excuse me?" I was outraged. "I know I'm holy, but saying I'm like crap is just taking the piss, Batfang."

"Funny," he said sarcastically.

I barely had time to open my mouth (to bite back with a typically fantastic reply, obviously) before he flipped over from his back, and wrestled me to the ground, knocking the wind out of me. I was lying on my back, with him on top of me, hands clasped.

I just got owned.

Let me repeat that.

Maximum Martinez, the girl known for... well, being Maximum Martinez, had just got owned.

By _Batfang._

You gotta be kidding me. I am so losing my touch.

"Owned," he whispered in my ear, his breath tickling my cheek. I waited for him to roll off me, but he didn't, looking down on me with amused dark eyes.

And holy crap did the butterflies strike.

So I did the sensible thing and flipped us over, so I was in control, just as it should be.

"Owned," I mimicked, leaning down to whisper it right in his ear, a smirk growing on my face. We stayed like that for a moment, just so he knew who was boss around here.

"Oh, my freakin' Gawd," came a high-pitched, stupid voice from behind us. Fang and I literally leapt to our feet, brushing off dirt from our jeans, to be confronted with a red-haired hag witch flaunting a phone. Lissa. And I thought she'd finally gone and died, what with her strange absence over the past couple of weeks. Or gone to live in a cave like the cavewoman she obviously is.

"What?" I asked, my tone offensive, hands finding my hips automatically.

"You," she said, pointing at me with one lethally sharp fingernail, "are cheating on that Dylan kid."

"As if!" I was practically fuming. I mean, seriously, she might have the red hair, but I'm the one with the temper in our mutual hate-hate relationship.

"Whatevar," she said flippantly. "I got the picture to prove it. So f*** you." she turned to Batfang after her oh-so-prophetic and oh-so-charming speech. "And you... you have my number." And with a flick of her disgusting hair, she was gone, strutting down the streets like a teenage prostitute (what do I mean, like? She's practically in training to become one).

"Well, that was nice," I said to Batfang once we were on our merry little way again. He just shrugged, his thoughts with the clouds. Not literally, obviously, metaphorically.

We walked the rest of the way in silence, both of us... thinking, I guess. It wasn't an awkward silence as such, more of a companionable one. It was nice. When we reached our houses, we stopped.

"See you later," he said with a half-smile.

"Yeah," I replied. "Hey, Batfang?" He glared, but raised an eyebrow (again, I'm guessing here, because of his stupid fringe. Either that or his hair has magic moving powers). "I missed you."

And that, folks, is the closest you'll ever hear to Max Ride getting emotional.

"Me too," he said, gathering me in a brief hug which said everything neither of us was ever going to voice aloud. "Sorry."

Hehe, two apologies in one day, I'm on a roll! It was his fault, though.

"I'll see you later, 'kay?" I was fully intending to copy his math homework: it's not cheating, it's working together.

We both set off down to our respective house, and I let myself into the hell that is my house.

**A/N**

**Mo: Batfang will catch on**

**Sara: Sure...**

**Mo: It will!**

**Sara: Go hide in a cupboard and count to a million. Then come out and find me.**

**Mo: I can't I'm in France! You're not even with me!**

**Sara: Calm down Fire!**

**Mo: STOP CALLING ME FIRE!**

**Sara: Fine then. Calm down Mo.**

**Mo: STOP CALLING ME MO!**

**Sara: But it's awesome! How about Firemo? Or Mire? Or Mofire?**

**Mo: Igiot! -.-**

**Sara. No I'm Sart. Get it Sara and smart! Sart! AND I AM NOT LIKE IGGY! He's retarded. I am not! I like Jirachi (looked on the internet for that) he likes pikachu. Who by the way I wanted to point something out about; he/she is a girl because he/she doesn't have a tinky winky for all of you who think he/she's a boy!**

**Mo: Facepalm!**

**Sara: Review! #:D**


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N- Okay so some people were confused thinking I write like Mo. She writes I update for her. It's fun 'coz I get to write the A/N's though. And I wanted to say to HerGoldenWings that no it is **_**not**_** Sara and Tart. It is Sara and smart! I. Am. **_**Not.**_** Under. Any. Circumstances. A. Tart! Also My name is SARA not SARAH! Sara is sssss-aarrrrrr-a Sarah is sssss-air-a. You pronounce my name as the AR as an RRRRR Okay. So On with the chapter.**

**Song- ********BigCityDreams by NeverShoutNever**

**Disclaimer- Mo doesn't own MR or that song. Or me! **

"Ella, I told you-"

"I don't care! I'm staying here! I hate you!"

"Ella, this isn't the time to-"

"I DON'T CARE!"

"Ella! Be quiet," Mum finally gained control over Ella, who was just a sobbing heap on her bed. I was stood in the doorway, watching with eyebrows raised. "Look, sweetie, I already told you two you need to get out of the house today, okay? Go with Max, play with Iggy and Fang..."

At the word 'play', mine and Ella's eyes met, and I couldn't help giggling. I mean, A, it sounded like we were toddlers, and B, it sounded extremely wrong. What can I say? Ig's dirty mind's rubbing off on me.

"Common, El, they don't bite," I said with a grin."Well... not unless Ig's having a Twilight Day."

She rubbed her eyes with the back of her hand, sniffling. "I don't want to see him."

"Well, then... what about Nudge?" Mum was trying to be helpful, but at the end of the day, she just needed to get us the hell outta the house. She had a patient coming over after a last-minute call, and apparently their pet Rottweiler was feeling out-of-sorts. Yeah. It probably wasn't tearing people to shreds. Not that I'm being Rottweiler-ist or anything, you know. Just stating the obvious.

"She's going out with Whatshisname," Ella sighed, rubbing at her eyes again. Oh. _Le boyfriend. _Such a lovely name.

"Come with me, then. I'll get Fang to do your math homework for you!" I would as well.

"It's okay," she replied, trying to grate her eyes raw, obviously. "I, um... I'm just going to go out... somewhere. I'll... I'll see you later."

Before me or Mum had a clue what she was doing, she'd run out of the room as fast as her long legs could carry her, and we both heard the front door slam.

Well, she's in a good mood, don't you think?

"Is she okay?" Mum wanted to know as she smoothed the duvet cover out.

I sighed, "Yeah. Just a bad day at school for her. She has her phone on her."

We both nodded. Why is Mum so pretty? And I didn't even get her eyes. Not that I'd want her eyes, or anything. I've got eyes like barfed-up chocolate, and she's got... I'm not going to describe them, I don't want to sound like a lesbian - Ig'd never let it go.

"You don't mind going next-door, do you?"

"Nah," I said, grinning. "You know they're my best friends."

She smiled. "I know."

In the brief silence that followed, the doorbell rang, and I was turfed out almost instantly. Charming. Cheers, Mum.

I strolled up the Rides' driveway slowly, taking in the broken toys that littered their garden - Iggy was training Gazzy to be destructive freak too! Poor Gaz. Ringing the doorbell, Iggy answered it almost instantly.

"Oh," he said darkly. "It's _you_." And shut the door. What a lovely best friend. He really loves me, can't you tell? I rang it again, and this time Fang answered, looking pissed.

"He blew up my bedroom," he explained, leading the way to the inevitably black room. I mean, holy crap, I could've mistaken it for space, if, you know, it wasn't... well, if it wasn't a room.

"Most people own a bed," I said, only seeing a desk, a wardrobe and chest of drawers. Damn, Batfang was tidy.

"Exactly," he pointed to a black frame that was practically invisible against the wall.

"Okay," I said slowly, shooting him a weird look. "Most people own a mattress."

"_Exactly."_

"Oh. Iggy?"

"Yup."

"Want to prank him?"

"You bet."

"Excellent."

About an hour later, we had the perfect prank, and completely blank math books where there should be homework. Oh well. I'll just tell Sir we weren't in the mood... although, the last time I did that, I got detention... Meh, I'll get Batfang to do it rapid-speed tonight by himself, like the emo loner he is.

"Okay, we'll take it in turns," I told Batfang with a grin. He nodded, dialing the extra digits in front of Ig's so his name wouldn't pop up on Ig's phone, and putting it on speaker. His bedroom door was locked and shut, so there was no chance of Ig figuring this out by stumbling upon us, which, to be honest, would be his only chance, since he's such an igiot.

"Hello?" Ig's voice filtered the phone.

"'Ello there, this is Jack Ingle from Dating Online dot com?" Damn, Batfang was good. Very good. Especially the Yorkshire accent. "Just calling to pass on a few messages from people who are interested. Can't remember how many you have, but if you'd give me your reply after each one, please."

"I... uh..." Fang, actually honest to God smiling, handed me the phone, biting back laughter.

"Hi, James..." I spoke in a breathy voice, and Fang had to turn away to stop from bursting out laughing. "I... I think you look really hot in your profile picture... I'd love to _meet up _sometime, you know? We could have lots of fun!"

Fang came back to retrieve the phone, "Your reply?"

For once in his life, Iggy was speechless. "I... I think you've got the wrong number."

"Are you James Griffiths?"

"Yeah-"

"Nicknamed Iggy?"

"I-"

"Best friends with Maximum Martinez, brother of Fang, Angel, and Zephyr Ride? Son of Janet Ride? In a band called Golden Silence? Interests include science and being stupid? Enjoys rampant sex on the first date?"

I actually had to leave the room after that last one, doubled over with laughter. Oh my God, we are actually amazing.

"Well, yes-" I heard Ig say from somewhere else in the house. Ducking back into Fang's room, I saw he was still smiling, which, you know, is practically a miracle.

"Then we've got the right number."

"Uh... okay..." Oh my God, Iggy, you absolute Igiot.

"Here's number two," Batfang said, and I stretched out my hand for the phone, but he shook his head at me, winking. "Hey there buckaroo," he spoke in a very deep voice, and I had to bite my tongue to keep from exploding in giggles. "I saw you're bicurious... I'd like to help you decide that... see you soon..."

"Right, erm..." Nervous Iggy = hilarious. I can't even explain how funny this is.

"Alright, number three," Fang said, ignoring him and placing the phone in my hand again.

"I fink you gawjuss, lad," I said, imitating Lissa (obviously). "I show you a good time lad, you just come round whenever you likes." Grinning, I handed the phone back to Batfang.

"That's all-" he started, but we were met with the dialtone - Iggy'd just hung up. He'd probably figured out that it was us, but... oh my God. We are the masters of prank calls, it's official.

About ten minutes of laughing later, Batfang pulled his math homework out and started doing equations and crap (I honestly don't know how I blagged my way onto the honour roll). Oh no he doesn't. I retrieved my own book from the floor (not my fault I knocked it off! Blame Ig for being so damn hilarious) and chucked it at him. It landed, brilliantly enough, right on top of his own after one of the corners clipped the side of his face.

"You do that," I grinned, "while I go check on Ig."

He gave me a one-eyed glare, but opened my book and started copying the answers. Good slave. I mean, best friend.

Ig's bedroom was right next to Batfang's emo area, so I didn't bother to prepare myself mentally for the onslaught of posters. As I pushed open the door, I wished I had: hanging right in front of the entrance, so you have to push it back to actually penetrate the room, was a freaking Pokemon poster. You are kidding me. I'm not touching that damn thing! It's like... a celebration of geeky retardedness... Oh, fine.

As if it was just waiting for my touch, as soon as I kicked the thing aside (who said anything about being gentle?) some anthem music started playing: '_POKEMON! GOTTA CATCH 'EM ALL! POKEMON!'_

"Make it stop! Ig!" I yelled, covering my ears from the pure awfulness. The retard did nothing, so I just walked a little further in, trying to ignore the Lady Gaga poster above his desk (covered in burn marks. Nice to know he's beginning to use his own furniture, even if he did blow up Batfang's mattress), and the multiple Pikachu accessories hanging from various things (you do not want to know).

Ig was curled up in a ball in a corner of the room, surrounded by plush teddies. He was shaking, and looking absolutely terrified.

"Max..." he said, once his eyes found me, one hand on my hip, eyebrows raised. "I... I got this phone call... I... I think I've been targeted by terrorists..."

I bit my lip very, very hard to keep from laughing. We should've known Iggy would be able to twist something like that into something like this. Oh, man, Batfang's gonna crack up.

"What was it about?" I asked through clenched teeth. What? You try getting in this situation.

"People wanting to... oh, Max, I'm going to die!" he shuddered and grabbed a teddy from the right of him, clutching it to his chest.

"Is that what they said?" My lip was beginning to bleed, but there was no way I was gonna this now.

"Practically!" he said, nodding emphatically. "They... they want to meet up with me! Join their secret operation!"

Oh, Iggy, you igiot. Really? I mean, I was expecting the inflated ego (all the better to beat up), but this? Honestly. "And are you going to meet up with them?"

He shrugged, "I don't know! It might be the only way to survive... before they take over the world!"

Hold up. Nu-uh.

"Excuse me? _I'm _taking over the world." I'll admit it - I was indignant. _My world. _Ig's igiocy had gone a step too far, now. No one questions my authority. Especially Iggy, 'cos he's... well, he's Iggy.

He shook his head before burying it into the teddy. Baby. "No... no, Max! They're deadly! It's fun and games to them!"

I shrugged, "Meh. My army'll kick their butt over to Mars. Although they can't take that over, either."

"Why not? It'd solve all our problems!"

"Because I have an alliance with the Marsvillians, you igiot!" I'm not even lying - it took me months of planning to establish, and there was no way I was gonna let Iggy ruin that for me. Same with the Plutonians. And the man on the moon (Bob, we're good friends. If you ever want some really nice cheese, I'm your girl). Ditto the Jupiterians.

He shivered again, "Fine. It's your grave you're digging."

Remind me how we even got into this conversation? Oh, yeah, me and Batfang pulled a phone prank, and Ig decides a terrorist organisation wants him to help them kill us all off and rule the world. Hmm. Okay, then. Not anything out of the ordinary, then.

"Whatever," I rolled my eyes, deciding that Batfang should be present for this display of true Igiocy. "Hey, you're coming to Dylan's house tomorrow, right?"

That caught his attention. "For what?"

"Band rehearsal," I explained. "Remember, we're supporting the Angel Range guys this Saturday?"

"I thought we hadn't decided yet?"

"Well, we did." We'd failed to bring Iggy into the discussion, mainly because we were debating how to kill Pikachu at the same time.

"WITHOUT MY EXPERTISE?" he flung the teddy away (poor thing. They have feelings, you know, and that one's so crying right now) and came to tower over me. Oh, thanks, Ig. I'm _not _small!

"Obviously," I deadpanned.

"I have a meeting this weekend," he turned away from me to fall onto the bed, where he could gaze up at a poster of Ke$sha (I'm going to shoot him when he tells me to spell his name as 1ggy. It's only a matter of time).

"Let me guess," I rolled my eyes. "With Jack Ingle?"

"How did you know?" he asked with wide eyes, voice laced with wonderment.

"I know these things," I replied, tapping my nose, rolling my eyes mentally (I'm also a master at that, just so you know). Igiot. Igiot. Igiot.

"Are you in on the terrorist movement?" he asked, before shaking his head, and pointing his index finger at me. "EXPELLIARMUS!"

"Look, Ig," I leaned towards him conspiratorially, rolling my eyes when he cowered away from me. "I don't mean to scare you, or anything, but... I know Voldermort."

And with that, I slammed my way out of his bedroom, throwing his stupid Pokemon poster on the floor just for dramatic effect (I'm learning from Ella. I never thought I'd say that... if I ever say that about Ig, which I won't, push me off the nearest cliff, I'm begging you).

**[ X X X ]**

"Hey," Dylan answered the door, ushering me, an irritated Batfang, and an irrita_ting _Iggy into his house, throwing a smile towards me, just for me.

"Konnichiwa," I replied for some unknown reason. I've had a weird day, leave me alone. _Leave, Max, alone _(do you get it? It's like Britney... oh, you know what, sod you. Bloody igiots, I'm not explaining my own jokes any more, I'll just laugh in solitude. You're turning me emo, I swear).

"Didn't know you were multi-lingual, Max," Ig remarked as Dylan lead the way to his attic. What? It's not cool to practise in attics? Well, we're bringing it back into style, 'kay? Good.

"Oh yeah," I said, waving slightly at Sam, who was sprawled over an old sofa, tuning his guitar. He nodded in recognition, smiling. "For example, did you know your name means arse in French?"

"It does not!" Ig protested, grunting as he pulled his drum set further backwards to allow me some more space. "Does it?" he turned to Batfang for confirmation, who was practically in his element up here, seeing as he is a bat and all.

He just shook his head, rolling his eyes. "Thanks, Max. Last time you told him only people with the nickname Iggy get rabies, he came into my room at three am screaming. Now he's gonna be afraid to go to France in Easter."

I grinned, and winked as I hooked up my mic. "Just doing my job."

"What's your job, then?" Sam asked. "Terrorising Ig?"

Remembering yesterday, I caught Batfang's eye and reigned in a giggle. "No freaking duh." I turned to Dylan, who was stood waiting. "You good to go?" I asked. He nodded, plucking each string to check his tuning was perfect, which, as always, it was. Damn my band for being so good.

"So what are we doing?" Ig asked, pounding his drums randomly.

"I figured we should do something slow," Sam shrugged. "You know, like Jamie and Liam did?"

"Yeah, but none of you guys can sing," I stuck my tongue, and they just nodded, knowing it was true. "Let's do NeverShoutNever!"

Sam nodded, "He's good."

"Good?" I practically exploded. "He's the best thing since sliced bread!"

"What was the best thing before sliced bread, then?" Iggy wondered aloud.

"Non-sliced bread?" I rolled my eyes.

"I'm cool," Dylan said, referring to my NeverShoutNever idea. "But you'd need a ukelele, and none of this play."

Sam pulled a face, "I'm not playing ukelele, dude. Not cool."

I gaped at him, "Ukes are awesome!"

"I agree," Batfang chimed in from his seat. "I play."

We all turned to give him a strange look. "You play ukelele?"

He shrugged, "For five years."

Me and Dyl exchanged a look, before I turned back to him. "What else you play?"

"Piano, guitar," he shrugged again, like a shrugging... thing. "A little flute, but that's it, really."

"You got your uke on you?"

"Always."

"Can you play BigCityDreams?"

"Pretty much everything by NeverShoutNever."

Does he have to be perfect? I mean, God.

"Well, go get it then," Sam made the decision for us all. Batfang took flight back down the stairs (ahahahahahahaha you see what I did there? I hate you all), and we all looked at one another.

"We could use him," Iggy said, before going back to his drums, which he'd been beating relentlessly, giving us all a headache.

Batfang returned quickly, carrying a small, hard black case, which he unclipped to reveal a cute little ukelele. What can I say? I've always wanted to play one. They're like the coolest things ever. He tuned it quickly, by ear, and came to stand beside me.

"You ready?" he asked.

"Are you?" I winked, and the corner of his lips tugged up slightly.

"Always."

And with that challenge ringing in my ears, I started to sing.

_You say we're both little people and you like it that way  
But in time I'm gonna put this body to shame (and grow old)  
Wear a suit like my old man  
Pack up all my things and get my ass outta town_

Okay, I'll admit it: hot damn he was good. His fingers moved just as quickly as Sam's on his beloved ukelele, making up for the piano easily, and Ig improvised a drum beat that didn't overshadow the simpleness of the song. My voice floated over the top of it all, mimicking Cristofer Drew's while adding my own twists here and there. This wasn't the song for headbanging, at all, so I just stood there, and sort of swayed, letting the music decide my directions. __

We've got it good  
Whether you like this town or not  
I know it's small but with a big head  
it's bound to get hot  
In the summer  
But the summer is a bummer  
If you can't leave  
This pathetic excuse for a town

That holds all your memories  
A lifetime of crushes and your broken dreams  
To be anywhere but here  
But baby anywhere is away from me

I winked at Batfang, who was playing the ukelele without even looking at the frets, effortlessly, and he grinned at me. Like, really grinned. Wow. He loves that thing. __

And ooh, hoo  
If you got it all figured out  
Then what is there to shout about  
This midwest town is gonna miss you  
Ooooooh  
Just go ahead and work it out  
_But first come on and let it out  
Scream it shout tell everybody that your gonna leave _

You know, I really do love this song.

_In about one year you'll have it all figured out  
These big city dreams are what you're about  
Walking like strangers among these states  
Only time will tell how long I can wait_

We've got it good  
Whether you like this town or not  
I know it's small but with a big head  
it's bound to get hot  
In the summer  
But the summer is a bummer  
If you can't leave  
This pathetic excuse for a town

That holds all your memories  
A lifetime of crushes and your broken dreams  
To be anywhere but here  
But baby anywhere is away from me

It was easy to harmonise with Batfang, like he'd been there all along, and it felt awesome just playing with my two best friends, even if I did hate them half-to-death (not all the way to death, that'd just be mean)._  
_  
_And ooh, hoo  
If you got it all figured out  
Then what is there to shout about  
This midwest town is gonna miss you  
Ooooooh  
Just go ahead and work it out  
But first come on and let it out  
Scream it shout tell everybody that your gonna leave_

Me again oh so casually  
Did you take the hit for me or the home team

If you got it all figured out  
Then what is there to shout about  
This midwest town is gonna miss you

None of us finished with a flourish, none of us wanting to ruin what had been a simple but beautiful song. Look at me, getting all poetic. NeverShoutNever can do that to you, you know.

"Wow," both Dylan and Sam said at exactly the same time, both impressed.

"You're in, Batfang," I told Batfang with a grin. He just winked at me like he'd expected it all along.

"I HAVE AN IDEA!" Iggy announced, coming to stand between us all. Run. For. Your. Life. No joke. Iggy's ideas kill.

"Good for you," Sam rolled his eyes, saving me from the effort.

"No, seriously," Iggy didn't give any of us the chance to respond/sprint off. "New member," he pointed at Batfang, who held his hands up in surrender, "new name!"

"Like what?" Dylan asked sceptically. I don't blame him: we've been Golden Silence as long as we can remember, and changing the name would just confuse everyone, like our fans, and, well, we'd loved the name, and still do.

"Uh... I was hoping you guys'd jump in there, honestly," Ig admitted, running a hand through his strawberry-blonde hair.

"What about Metamorphic?" Batfang suddenly suggested.

We all considered for a moment, weighing up the pros and cons, but, honestly?

"I like it."

"Me too," Sam agreed.

"Me fourth!" Iggy jumped in, igiotically as always.

We all turned to Dyl, who pulled a face. "It makes us sound like we're a metal band," he shrugged.

"It's four versus one, man," Sam pointed out apologetically.

"Sorry, Dyl," I told him. "But Metamorphic it is."

We all fisted our hands together, then pulled them away, the new fifth fist feeling just right, the new voice shouting 'Metamorphic!' sounding just right against all ours.

We're Metamorphic, and we're coming to get you (yes, I'm trying to be cool with that phrase to end this little chapter in our life. Leave me alone).

**A/N- So whatcha think? It's greeeat! (frosties advert!) So ciao people. Mo will be back for the next A/N :/ Now I'm sad. I think I like doing her A/N's for her. I'll ask her when she gets back if I can do them more often. She'll probably say no so yeah. Ciao for now! - Sara! (Not Dumb. Dim Blonde).**

**P.S. I'm sorry it's a day late. I only remembered this morning when I turned my phone on and I had a text from Mo. OH well... Ciao people! ):**


	17. Chapter 17

**Disclaimer: James Patterson is obviously clever enough not to get completely and utterly sunburnt. On one side. After 2 hours in the sun. FML.**

**A/N: ...a text which you never actually replied to, my dear friend Sara *death glare* Katniss shall be having words with you, my little non-friend. Oh, hey, you guys! I'm back! (: Thank you so, so, so, so much for making me reach 300 reviews, getting out of that damn car and seeing that was quite possibly the best thing to conclude the best experience of my life, aka Leeds Festival, aka Paramore, Blink182, YouMeAtSix, and All Time Low. Epic doesn't quite cover it. Plus, I MET THE MIDNIGHT BEAST! They're so awesome, and I got a picture with the rather good-looking Stefan XD. But, seriously, thank you so much, it's so above any expectations I had. **

**O.M.F.G. MOCKINGJAY!**

**Has anyone else finished it? I got home from France, and literally jumped up and down and screamed when I found it waiting for me, and finished it that night [the night before Leeds Fest... heh...], and I'm so desperate for someone to fangirl about it with! If you've read it, PM me so we can squeal together. I say fangirl, but... ARGH, someone, PM me! Sara, you WILL read the entire Hunger Games trilogy, even if I have to shove it down your throat. **

**And on that pleasant note, enjoy this chapter! (:**

"Ella?" I knocked on her bedroom door after band practice, wondering what the hell she was doing in there. I mean, God, she'd been in there for two hours - if she's smoking weed, or something, it really can't have taken more than twenty minutes to get high for someone as small as her. She didn't have to go through the dramatic statement of refusing to come out for tea for the second time.

I mean, not that El would ever smoke weed, or anything... I damn well hope not, at least.

"Ella, I swear, if you don't open this damn door, I'm gonna break it down." So I wasn't exactly in a mood full of sunshine, lollipops and unicorns. Who ever is, besides Iggy? He really does have his gay moments, you know - once he walked to school with a sign saying FREE HUGS. When I asked him what the hell was wrong with him, he explained that it was his lucky day, and he wanted to share it with the world.

I worry about him.

A few moments later, though, the door clicked open, and I strolled into Ella's little haven of pink girlishness. Ew. Remind me why I even came in here? Oh, yeah. Mum promised to buy me Taylor Swift's new single. Don't look at me weirdly: I like her. You got a problem with that? No? Good. Katniss is on hold for anyone who pisses me off, so I'd watch it if I were you. If you get _really _irritating, like Iggy level, then there's always Finnick and Gale too... so, you know, unless you want to die an extremely painful and humiliating death, I'd shut up.

"So, what the hell's up?" I asked tactfully, averting my eyes from all the disgusting make-up on her desk and perching on her bed, which, personally, I think is way too fluffy. Who needs a fur duvet? Ella, obviously.

"Nothing," she said in a small voice, looking up at me with deep depressing eyes. Cue sighing on my part.

"Ella."

"What?" More trembling lips.

"Ella."

"What?" Eyes shimmering with tears.

"Ella."

"_What?_"

Glaring at me, she pulled the covers up around her until they surround her face. I have to say, the three-quarters-concealed-in-pink-fur look is a definite improvement on her normal make-up. Because, clearly, I'm such a mastermind when it comes to clown paint.

Okay, though, in all seriousness, she's clearly extremely upset, and in a very delicate situation where one harsh word could send her over the edge, into the hole of depression that so many teenagers seem to- I really need to stop reading Mum's teenage help books. I don't even know why she has them, but having them right there on the windowsill is just tempting. Especially when there's nothing on TV. And yes, I'm including Glee and all other Ella-related crap in the 'nothing' category.

Right, no more distractions. I swear, my thoughts are taking an extremely worrying turn for the Nudge side of town. And by that, I mean they're turning into thoughtless (ironic, considering they're thoughts themselves), stupid, and pointless rambles that really have no place in life. A little bit like Iggy, really. And all that's practically describing Pikachu.

Oh my God, I got distracted _again. _On one hand, this is totally flattering: I'm so interesting that I actually get distracted by my own thoughts, but on the other, Ella's still just lying there, looking a little bit worried, and... right, that's it. No more thinking. Remind me to ask Iggy how he's so good at that.

"Max?" Ella prompted, raising an eyebrow. "You dead in there, or something? Actually, you don't need to answer that."

Hmm. I wonder how she manages to be quite so sarcastic even when she's meant to be on the brink of death... did I say death? I meant tears. And just FYI, if I _had _said death, then I don't necessarily mean suicide. Cue cheesy wink. Kidding, kidding (sort of).

"Whatever," I let her extremely painful insult slide, even though I'll probably be crying myself to sleep over it tonight. I'm just nice like that. "You need to snap out of this, okay? Nudge is terrorising Lily, and God knows what'll happen tomorrow when her cousin gets here tomorrow. I swear, if she's a mini-Nudge, we'll all... explode... yeah... uh, where was I?" Again with the distractions. "Oh, yeah. We need you there to shut her up, and entertain her cousin, like the entertaining person you are, okay?"

That rant was Nudge-standard. First my thoughts, now my speech? What's happening to me? I mean, seriously.

"I'm entertaining?" was all Ella said in a small voice, a little muffled by the duvet. Not literally small, obviously, because voices can't be small. Although, small is a harsh word (I should know, thanks to Ig), so I'll rephrase:

"I'm entertaining?" was Ella said in a _vertically challenged _voice, a little muffled by the duvet.

Much better.

I considered for a moment. "Well, your face is."

She scowled at me, or at least the fur on her face moved around her eyebrows and mouth, so I'm guessing she was either trying to pull an especially attractive face, or, much less likely, she was scowling.

"What?" I asked, more interested in wondering if I could throw her out of the window and plead guilty for assisted suicide... I mean, I asked in a sisterly, concerned tone.

She just shrugged. Well, really, the covers around her shoulders moved, so either that, or she was having an epileptic fit. Which would be ironic, considering they're normally triggered by flashing lights, not an overload of fake (at least, I hope it is) pink fur. Plus, you know, she's not epileptic, but details, details. Must you make this more difficult than it has to be? No, you don't, so shut up. You're as useless as Fang's fringe, and that's seriously saying something.

"It wouldn't kill you to be nice for once," she mumbled, going for the Bambi eyes approach again. The eyes kill. Don't look.

"What's up?" Crap, I looked.

Shrugging again (let's not get into the shrugging/epileptic fit debate, okay?), she pulled the covers way up over her head. I was about to walk off because, hey, I tried, and besides, it was a serious improvement on the whole show-her-face look (I'm now debating whether or not a paper bag would be sufficient as a Christmas present), but then that really irritating nice part of me kicked in.

Our little 'conversation' went a little like this:

Nice me: Go back to her, Max, listen to her troubles and embrace her...

Normal me: Damn, I thought you'd committed suicide after I started a rock band since they're Satanic? And ew, no thanks, I have a boyfriend.

Nice me: Satanic-ism is not something to embrace, Maximum, or even talk about... and are you entirely sure that this boyfriend isn't a woman in drag?

Normal me: WTF? Satanic-ism? And excuse me, I think you're mixing up my boyfriend and best friend. No, not the emo one, the one who walks around pretending to hold a leash and telling people that he's walking his Houndoom.

Nice me: ...What is this Houndoom you speak of?

Normal me: A retarded dog thing with horns they call a Pokemon because they have no original ideas.

Nice me: And these are real, yes?

Normal me: No...

Nice me: GODDAMMIT MAXIMUM RIDE, HELL YES THEY ARE REAL!

Normal me: ...How much time have you spent with Iggy?

Nice me: ...Too long.

Normal me: Thought so.

Nice me: Yeah.

Normal me: Well, this is awkward... can you go back to the whole angel thing?

Nice me: What? Oh, _that. _Do I _have _to?

Normal me: Well, you are meant to be the part of me that I wish was dead, so, you know.

Nice me: Oh, right, no problem! Go back to Ella, and ask of her troubles...

Normal me: She's probably run out of lipstick.

Nice me: Probably. But that'd solve the Christmas present dilemma, would it not?

Normal me: Oh, no, that's _long _solved. God, do you live under a rock or something? I'm getting her a paper bag. They're all the rage.

Nice me: ...I don't get paid enough for this job.

And that, folks, is the nice side of me. I hope you enjoyed that, because there's no way you're ever going to meet her again. Though, I have real suspicions that she may actually be a man, because, let's face it, no one could be that annoying and _not _be a man. Face the facts.

So, after that more than slightly disturbed conversation with the voice in my head, I yanked the covers off of Ella, and tried not to recoil at the sight of her face. I kid, I kid - for some reason, she managed to get all of Mum's genetics. I'd describe them, but then, you know, that'd just fuel Ig's lesbian theory. Which, by the way, is both completely ridiculous, and hypocritical, since he's the one who goes around enthusing about vampires, and telling people how he sparkles in the sun because his new best friend Edward taught him how. Personally, if I ever met this Edward guy, I'd ask him WTF is up with his diet, because, hello, meat is like... just don't ever question the power of meat. Especially bacon.

Anyway, back to Ella... she gave me a very dirty look, which just cemented my paper bag idea, mainly because I'd be doing not only her a favour, but the rest of the world.

"Come on," I said in a forced voice. "What's up?"

She sighed loudly, and ran a hand through her long, black hair (and no, that was not in any way a description possibly pointing to lesbianism. _Ig_). "I just... I feel kind of... left out, you know?" Oh, man, she's expecting a heart-to-heart. Right, I can do this... I can... "I mean, everyone's got a boyfriend, or girlfriend, and..." not do this.

"Well, you could always date Batfang," I pointed out.

Sending me a WTF look, she let out a bemused giggle. "You're freaking joking, right?"

I put on my most serious face, which is known to terrify Iggy."No, I'm regular joking." Yes, I do feel the need to say it more than necessary.

"That," she said, pointing one dangerously sharp fingernail in my face, "is _my _joke."

Oh, crap. I forgot she was the one who told me that, along with the classic butt-trumpet line, which is... well, you've all witnessed the incredible effectiveness of that. Thanks for coming to the rescue, there, brain - now I won't be able to use that line ever, ever again, which is so depressing I may have to cut... Fang's fringe. Yes. I shall do that. But, seriously, brain, you're definitely not Mariah Carey's Hero... which, considering Iggy's whole lesbian theory, is probably no bad thing.

"What joke?" I said, backing off of her bed towards the door. "I don't know what you're talking about. Joke? What is a joke? Your face? Yes, yes it is. That will be all, goodbye!"

Quickly, I stepped out of her room and shut the door. Point one for Max!

**[ X X X ]**

"Hi hello, this is Iggy Griffiths, and I'm here with my psychopath hobbit of a best friend, Maximum Martinez, and her charming little sister, Ella. Max, say hi."

"Excuse me?" I raised my eyes at both him and the Flip camera he was thrusting at practically everything, and, at this moment in time, me. "She gets charming, and I get psychopath hobbit?"

"Face it, Max," Ella grinned from my side, fully covered from the night before, though she was still a little pissed that I stole her joke. Meh. "I'm great, you're fake, nothing personal."

"IT WAS YOU!" I yelled, grabbing her arm and pushing her into a headlock.

"What. Are. You. Talking. About?" she spluttered, each word punctuated by me shaking her head violently.

"You," I say, giving her head one last shimmy, for bad luck, before releasing her and stomping on her feet, "stole my All Time Low CD!"

"I did not!" she replied, clearly lying. Instead of trying to shake me off, she just stood there and tried to return her hair to its previously 'perfect' position, which I'd expertly ruined. What can I say? I have a talent.

"Girls, girls," Iggy smirked, flipping the camera between us and him. "No need for a catfight."

"She stole my All Time Low CD!" I screeched, too annoyed with Ella to grab that damn camera and smash it on the ground.

"Wait, what?" Iggy gaped. "You don't mess with All Time Low, girl! What's wrong with you?"

For the first time in our entire relationship, I found myself actually agreeing with Ig. "Exactly! It's like the golden rule!"

Iggy looked confused. "I thought that was tell the truth?"

"Just shut up."

"Yes, Sir."

"I hate you."

"Cassie hates you."

I turned on him, shooting him a strange look. "Who the hell is Cassie?"

"The camera," he grinned. Rolling my eyes, I grabbed his wrist in my hand and twisted it. His fingers loosened around the Flip camera, allowing it to fall easily into my other outstretched hand.

"Nicely done," Ella commented as I thoroughly examined it, to check there was no way it could be used as an explosive of some sort, or a Pikachu carrying device. Hmm. It seemed clean, but with Ig, who knew? Turning it off, I returned it to him.

Okay, let's back up a little bit, shall we? I'm sure you're all a little confused. So, this morning, me and a grouchy Ella (like I said before, she was moody about the whole joke-stealing thing) departed for school, and, about halfway there, Ig came running up behind us, spouting some rubbish about becoming a YouTube star. I told him that he was just being stupid, and did he really want the entire world being able to see his Igiocy, and making fun of his gayness and Pokemon obsession? Unfortunately, he didn't seem to care, and promptly started filming, and... well, you're just about caught up there, aren't you? No need to thank me for the lovely commentary I provided, I'm nice like that.

"Ella!" a little ball of hyper annoyingness (yes, it's a word. In _my _dictionary) launched itself towards us from the school gates that were looming in front of us, like... like... uh... Iggy's face? Ugh, no, that's even worse... erm... okay, so I've forgotten how to create an effective simile... let's move on. Right now. You want me to get Jace out here? No, I didn't think so.

"Agh..." Ella struggled to keep her balance as the thing latched itself to her. "Can't... breathe..."

"Good!" screeched the thing - now identifiable as a half-pissed, half-hyper Nudge monster - squeezing Ella one last time, extra hard, before letting her go. "Don't you leave me like that again!"

Ella raised her eyebrows (copycat much? I may have to copyright the whole raised eyebrows thing. Seriously) as she rubbed her sore shoulders... I feel so bad for her. Not.

"You didn't come into school! I couldn't find you anywhere!"

"And?" Ella was clearly unimpressed. "I've been ill before!"

"Yeah, but you _know _it's Sara's first day!"

"What?" Ella finally showed some sign of emotion: a true WTF face. God, where's my phone? I so wish I had a picture of that. "I thought you said they hadn't decided yet?"

"Hadn't decided what yet?" A girl's voice said from behind me and Ig.

Turning round, Nudge burst my eardrums. Don't read this, you may go blind.

"OOHHMIIGOOODDDDDD!" she screamed as she threw herself at the girl. To our surprise, instead of calling for security, the girl actually hugged Nudge back. Am I missing something here? Besides my brain, who is taking a so-not-needed vacation in Hawaii? I say vacation, but I'm seriously beginning to think it might be a relocation... this is worrying twist in the adventures of Maximum Ride's brain (available at all good book stores... or not).

"NUDGE!"

Oh, dear God. There is a Nudge clone in the building. And I thought my brain's relocation was worrying.

"I MISSED YOU SO MUCH!"

Shoot me now.

"ME TOO! IT'S BEEN TOO LONG!"

Why am I not dead?

"AH!"

"AH!"

My head hurts.

"ENGLAND DOESN'T DESERVE YOU!"

No, they don't deserve England. What did the poor old Brits ever do to deserve this Nudge clone? Actually, what did we Americans ever do to warrant _two _Nudges? And what did I ever do to be punished with _both _of them in my life?

"AMERICA DOESN'T DESERVE YOU!"

Again, I feel compelled to point out that, actually, Nudge doesn't deserve America.

"I MISS-"

"Will you shut up?" I shoved Nudge's head forward, just roughly enough so that it smacked into the girl's with enough force to give her a headache. I'm quite good at that really.

"Yeah," Iggy seconded. Both girls were now glaring at me and rubbing their foreheads - I'm practically shaking. No, seriously: all the black eyeliner + narrowed eyes = demented panda look. "It's like watching a porno!"

All four of us turned to give him a pure WTF look. See, this is the sort of oh-so-intelligent comments that have earned Iggy the school idiot status.

"What the _hell _are you doing?" I asked, referring both to the igiotically perveted ( Igverted?) comment, and the Flip camera in his hands, which he'd obviously just taped the entire little reuinion with.

"Just being myself," Ig grinned, turning the camera between the two of us as we talked.

"Can you go be yourself somewhere else then?" Fang said as he sauntered up to us, eyebrows raised at Nudge and the girl.

"Please," Ella added, giving Fang a high-five. Remind me to ask her when those two got quite so friendly?

"You're all in denial," Iggy pouted pathetically. And this is the guy who's apparently been enlisted to join a terrorist organisation. Well, their standards just fell. A lot. A lot a lot. A lot a lot a lot. A lot a lot a l- I think you guys get it.

"Of what?" Ella asked.

"Your great love for me," he said with a wink at me.

I spluttered. "You wish."

He just laughed, turning back to the camera. "Do you think she loves me? Leave a comment in my crotch."

WTF? Did he just... you know what, never mind. I've learnt that when it comes to Ig, pretending not to hear is the best path to go down. Yup.

"Excuse me?" Oh dear. Nudge is talking. Ear-plugs all round, methinks. "You're all ignoring Sara!"

"Sara?" Fang asked stupidly.

"Me!" the girl from Nudge's shouted way too loudly, especially this early in the morning.

I looked at her; she had dark blonde, shoulder-length hair that framed a heart-shaped face. She wore classy glasses (who'd've thought a relative of Nudge's could ever be classy? No offence or anything to Nudge, but still), and her eyes were a stormy blue. Unlike Nudge, who was wearing a short skirt and tight hoodie, she was wearing stylishly frayed jeans, and a long-sleeved t-shirt, a string bracelet hanging off her wrist. Some sort of tacky metal adorned the string, and it kept bobbing up and down whenever she moved her wrist. Can you even say frustrating? Well, I suppose she is Nudge's friend, so what did I expect?

"Hi," Ella said after a moment of 'Oh God, it's another Nudge' thoughts.

"Hi!" Sara replied enthusiastically. Dear God.

"So..." Fang said awkwardly. Real helpful, Batfang. No, really: thanks for lending your incredible experience with words to this conversation. You're practically a genius.

Uh, not.

"So, you're Nudge's cousin?" Ella asked to break the even more awkward silence that fell after Batfang's Oscar-worthy speech.

"Yes!" Sara grinned. Honestly, can she only ever reply with one-word answers? Please ring, bell. I need to escape. And piss off Lissa, because I'm in one of those moods where... well, really, I just like pissing off Lissa.

"Sara's come from England where she normally lives with her Mum and she's really nice and we talk on Facebook a lot she's really funny and kind and lovely and you've got to be really nice to her because she's a bit retarded because she's Sara but that's okay because I love her though I have to love her because she's my cousin I only love her in a cousin matey way though because it'd be weird and disgusting if I loved her like I love apple pie or Luke OHMIGOD ELLA I HAVE TO TELL YOU ABOUT OUR DATE!"

And then the bell rung. Typical.

Instead of moving, though, we all just stared at Nudge, who was looking thoughtful.

"Can we get cookies?" she said, like she hadn't just given the longest sentence ever spoken in the history of the earth.

"And that, folks," Iggy grinned, brandishing the camera again, "is a wrap. See you in math, Max." Then he just walked off.

I hate my best friends.

**A/N: Longer one! ^-^ Hope you liked it, anyone get the subtle Mitchell Davis reference, if you know who he is? If not, YouTube livelavalive - he's freakin' hilarious. Anyway. Again, Mockingjay finishers, PM me. Sorry for not replying to reviews for the last couple of chapters, but I honestly haven't a clue where to start with them all, it's so incredible. Thank you so, so much again. Such a brilliant thing to come back to. **

**Review?**


	18. Chapter 18

**Disclaimer: Do we have to go through this again?**

**Anyway. I'm sorry I sort of disappeared for a week... or two... I've just been literally swamped in back-to-school homework [yay! ...Sarcasm rules], and I've just not had the time or the inspiration to write. Seriously. But I'm going to try harder to find the time to write and, uh, keep my online life alive (: Thank you muchly for all the reviews, they made going back to school not so bad [yeah, really]. **

**Here we gooooo~**

Damn, this place is really hot. And really, really crowded. Like, imagine the most amount of people you can, all crowded in one place... okay, you there? Good. Now double it. And again. And again. And... thirty more times...

I think you get my point; the place was bloody swarming with people.

Okay, I'm not trying to be people-ist or anything, but I don't like people. I'm not being racist either, I just don't. Like. People. They make me feel blocked in... well, you've seen what happens when I get squashed in crowds: I actually allow Batfang to carry me.

"Max!" Dylan yelled, from somewhere near the bar. He'd been grabbing me, Iggy and Lily all drinks (and paying, too. Good slave... boyfriend. I really need to stop referring to him as that. It's gonna come back to get me someday... Nah, it's too entertaining) before we went on to play.

"Hold on!" Iggy shouted back to him. "I'll dazzle them!" He then proceeded to give the crowd his 'Edward Cullen' look, which was really just him glaring at them, trying to be moody, and brushing his hair up into a ridiculous Jedward-style quiff (personally, I think Calvin Harris had it right with the pineapple). Naturally, the crowd didn't pay the slightest bit of attention, and, like always, he just looked like an absolute prat.

I hate his Twilight days.

I turned to Lily, mainly to avert my eyes from Iggy's especially disgusting face (have you _seen _his Edward face? It's just plain scary. Though I suppose it does look better than Justin Bieber... that's not all that hard though). "Why?"

"What?" Lily was trying to look everywhere but at her boyfriend. Can't blame her, really.

"Why _him?_"

She laughed, like it was a joke. Uh... I was being deadly serious... should I?

"No, really." I gave her my extremely serious look. Iggy was now trying to get into the small square of sunlight streaming in through the window so he could sparkle. Oh dear God.

"I dunno, really."

"Yeah, me neither."

You can really feel her love for Iggy right there in those three words, huh? I think that should be the new marriage statement, you know? I could write a whole play about it:

Minister: Do you take Iggy Griffiths to be your lawfully wedded... blahblahblah... you really think I'm thinking through that entire waffle? Nu-uh. ...husband?

Lily: I dunno, really.

Iggy: Me neither.

Lily: So.. what should we do now?

Iggy: LET'S PLAY POKEMON!

Lily: Let's file a divorce!

Iggy: NOOOOOO!

Me: Told you so.

Pokemon: it'll always be his major downfall. Besides his incredibly irritating personality, and just about everything else... well, if you think about it, he's just a major downfall in himself. He can't help it; he's special. I hope you're laughing at that.

I made that joke just for you.

See, there's something I never told you... so I'm going to do it now... I love you. I love you so much that sometimes when I see you I start giggling, and I sometimes I giggle so much I pee myself... that's love pee, for _you! _I love you so much, I'll even watch your favourite film with you... just for the record, though, I don't get why they sparkle. I love you so much, I follow you around sometimes... which is a little weird, I'm sorry. I love you so much, I get so nervous I get diarrhoea... yeah, we need to talk about that. Look, you are the bees knees. If bees had little tiny knees, you'd be them.

All I'm trying to say is... I love you.

No, really, I do.

No, I'm not cheating on you with Mitchell... no, don't do this!

You're being ridiculous.

No, _you_ are.

Not.

Shut up.

Yes... no... no... yes...

Fine, I love you. Happy?

Don't start this again.

_PSYCHE. _

Gotcha there, didn't I? I know, I should be a comedian... I mean, comedienne. Don't tell Iggy I said that, he'd never let it go.

"Um... Ig..." Once he started beckoning people in a completely scary manner and using his index fingers as fangs, Lily finally decided that she really should intervene. Naturally, during this entire performance/save Dylan thing, Dyl was still stuck at the bar, just staring at Iggy like he was completely freaked out. What do I mean, _like? _He _was _totally freaked out.

"Yes, my love?" He's putting on some 'vampire' voice that just makes me want to give him a cough sweet... ha, who I am I kidding? Me, give someone something? As if.

"Um..."

"What is the problem, my love? Should I be my perfect self, and make it all better?" And the fangs return.

"Well..." God.

"Tell, my love. I will kill for you!" Help.

"People are staring..." Me.

"THEN LET THEM STARE!" Oh my God. I don't know him. "I LOVE YOU, BE-LILY!"

Belily. It could catch on... or not.

You know what, I'm actually moving away. I swear, people are actually stopping to stare at him. It's only a matter of time before it's on the inter- I take that back. Sam's recording it all for Iggy's YouTube channel. Remind me to check that out and leave rude comments.

Shoving through the crowd, I grabbed my Coke out of Dylan's hand easily. "Hey." Yeah, that was as cool as I described it... honest, it was!

"Hey," he sounded tired, and we hadn't even played yet. Iggy has that effect on people.

"We're on in five," Sam appeared behind us, a pretty blonde-haired girl attached to his arm. God knows how they both managed to get up here, it's a jungle out there.

Oh, I forgot to explain, didn't I? Ah, well. See, it's Saturday night, and we're all preparing to play support for our lovely friends in the superior Angel Range. We hate them for being better than us, but we love them because they're just as immature as us. If you got that, you're an Igius.

"Yup," I glanced over at Iggy, who was now pretending to play the piano in the air. Lily was just looking at us all with those sad Bambi eyes that just made it all so much funnier. "I think we should vote Ig out of the band. Hi, Amber, by the way."

Amber, Sam's girlfriend, gave me a big beaming smile. She's absolutely tiny, like a pixie, but she's really... happy. It's kind of... irritating? No, I don't mean that, she just makes you feel like you're wasting your life. I mean, _seriously. _The girl gets up at _six am _on a _Sunday_ to feed food to the homeless. Can you even say Hannah Montana worthy? If I'm being completely honest, she's way out of Sam's league. I mean that in the nicest possible way, of course. Cue wink.

"Hi Max!" Agh, the perkiness! It's killing me, it's killing me!

"Agreed," Sam said, throwing a disgusted look at Iggy.

"Seconded," Dylan chuckled, smiling at me. Thank God there are no butterflies any more. It's just like normal again. That's a good thing, right? He doesn't make me feel all tingle-y and melty, so... yeah, I think that's a good thing.

"Right, that's decided then. Iggy Cullen's out."

"Hey, guys!" Someone called from the door. Naturally, because we're all so self-centred, all four of us immediately turned to see who it was. Thankfully, it wasn't some randomer making us look as conceited as we are, it was Ella, Nudge, and Sara. Though, technically, they are randomers. Wink wink.

"OHMIGOD AMBER YOU LOOK SO PRETTY! Where did you get your dress? I think I might actually love it it's so pretty you're so pretty Sam your girlfriend's so pretty you know that? Amber why are you still with him he's a bit of a retard really OHMIGOD WHAT THE HELL IS IGGY DOING?"

Nudge - who else? - yelled that last part loud enough for Mr. Cullen himself to turn around and give her a 'smouldering' look i.e. Iggy glaring whilst raising his eyebrows in his 'provocative' manner, that really just made him look more than a little constipated. Poor Lily looked like she just wanted to die.

"Calm down," Sara rolled her eyes. That was before she saw Iggy. "Oh. My. GOD. What the fudge?"

Ella just rolled her eyes at both of them, more than used to Iggy's more than terrifying Twilight Days, and fought her way through the crowd easily. Hmm. She must've picked up the kneeing thing from me. See, in crowds, they all expect you to elbow them, so I knee them where it hurts. Simples.

"Where's Fang?" she asked once she got here. I shrugged, gesturing over to where Fang had been cornered by the Maids of All Fashion. Lucky him. Clearly, the pen and the tea didn't quite do the trick for Brigid. It also hadn't taken her any time at all to become Lissa's little minion again, judging from the fact that she's trying to laugh at some joke Lissa must have made. She looks like she's choking. Fang, on the other hand, is trying to hide behind his fringe (which isn't all that hard to do), and looks absolutely terrified.

LOL.

How I laugh at his expense.

"Want to rescue him?" Sam grinned at me, and I knew he was thinking exactly the same thing as I was.

"I'll yell, you insult," I instructed him. He tipped an imaginary hat, winking. I love having him in my army sometimes, I really do. I mean, when Frodo's a bit busy, you know, saving the world, and all, he's an all right substitute, for what it's worth. "OY, FANGENSTEIN!"

Oh, the joy it gave me when he actually turned around. Batfang or Fangenstein? I do believe I love them both. I'm never letting this go. Ever/

"Set's in a minute," Sam started. "Slavs aren't welcome."

"Slavs?" Ella inquired in an over-loud falsetto, playing along.

"Slutty stupid airhead slags mixed with make-up slathered chavs," Sam defined, pretty damn brilliantly in my opinion.

"Who think hot mud is tea," I finished for him, smirking as Brigid's cheeks reddened. Sam and I slammed a high-five as Fang, half-smiling, extracted himself from their little group of bitchiness, and easily joined our little group of awesomeness.

He barely had time to even speak (not that he was going to say anything particularly interesting, because a) it's Fang, after all, and b) he was staring at Iggy like he was going to comment. I'd like to add that seeing as Iggy was now going around, clutching people, bringing them to his chest, glaring at them, whispering in their ears 'You may be my lamb for eternity... the lion and the lamb!', then looking into the distance expectantly, throwing them away so they practically fell over, and then starting the process again, I wouldn't have been too surprised if he did comment, because... you know what? I'm not explaining myself to you. No, I'm not), before Jamie poked her head out of the curtain draped across a little circular area behind the stage (cunningly named 'Back-Stage'), and beckoned to us frantically.

We, obviously, started heading over there, Dylan and I pausing to grab Iggy by the collar of his shirt and wave goodbye to Lily, who looked extremely relieved to be seeing the back of her retarded boyfriend.

"Hey!" Jamie greeted us once we were all behind the curtains, Iggy grumbling something about vampire rights. She pulled me in for a quick hug, beaming. "So glad it's you guys! The idiots always do something stupid that makes, like, every band hate us. Typical."

I laughed. "You think _they're _idiots?" I pointed at Iggy, who was trying to find out whether or not the sunlight would hit him at the right angle. Vampires these days. Are they all girly prima donnas, or is it just Edward Cullen? Just Edward? I thought so. "We have _the _igiot."

Jamie considered for a moment. Then she grinned. "True. Anyway," she turned to Fangenstein, Sam, and Dylan, who were all stood behind me, "you guys want to set up? The mic's all okay for Max, and the instruments are out there, but we didn't know what sound levels you prefer, so... you know."

Dylan and Sam immediately nodded and strolled off, dragging Iggy behind them despite his protests. No, they're not fit for your ears. Fang stayed by my side, though, until Jamie felt she needed to ask:

"You're not Dylan, are you?"

I gave her a weird. "Hell no. He's Batfang. Call him Fangenstein if you want, though. He's an emo."

"Ah," she nodded like all was clear. "I was wondering about the fringe."

"I know! It's so stupid."

"Completely useless."

"It's as pointless as Ke$ha."

"And Cheryl Cole."

"Don't forget Lady Gaga."

"How could I?"

"I know, Alejandro? Couldn't she have chosen a real name, like... Butch?"

"Well, she is rumoured to be a lesbian."

"Shouldn't it be titled Justin Bieber then?"

"I love you."

"I love you too."

See, that's how you know who the _really _awesome people in this world are. You can have a conversation with them based entirely on references, and it feels completely and utterly normal. Okay, that might be because _you _think that Jamie and I are just both complete retards, but _we _know it's because we're just so completely awesome you can't understand our awesomeness.

Well, that made sense.

Saving Batfang from saying something in response to our expectant gazes, Dylan walked back over to us, smiling.

"We're all good. Fang, we set up your guitar a little quieter, since we figured that seeing as you don't know the part so well, and if you mess-"

"I get it," Fangenstein said, a little sharply. Something tightened infinitesimally in his features, but when I blinked it was gone.

"Break a leg, you guys!" Jamie grinned, before ruffling my hair and bounding off to join the rest of Angel Range. This wasn't our biggest gig, by far, but it was pretty damn fun already. We're so playing with Angel Range _way _more often.

Sam and Ig met us at the curtains, so we could do our little pre-show ritual. Hey, you didn't think we were actually going to go on without it, did you? Silly person.

With that, I jumped onto the little 'stage' (really just a raised platform that made me feel a little bit taller - win!), and yelled into the microphone. "HEY! We're Metamorphic, and we're gonna start this off with a little bit of Paramore! One two three four!"

The guys immediately burst into a rousing rendition of Misery Business, which was quickly becoming our signature song. And, let me tell you, the audience were totally_ captivated. _

Well, at least until around halfway through, just before his big solo, Sam stopped playing all together, and yelled, "Hey! Hold up!"

Oh, brilliant.

**A/N: Little attempt at a cliffy, it's not really a huge one, though. Sorry for not replying to reviews, it's like 12pm here right now, and I'm tired as hell. I'm not sure about this chapter. Did you guys find it boring and slow? Meh. Let me know, and I'll try not to do one like this again (: Hope you liked it anyway, and I promise the next update will be much sooner!**

**Review?**


	19. Chapter 19

**Disclaimer: Yadda yadda yadda not JP.**

**A/N: Hey, you guys! Thank you _so_ much for all the reviews of the previous chapter, they were lovely to read, as always :D You know how much I appreciate them, right? **

**So this chapter is posted as part of Project PULL [Push Ur Limits and Learn], run by the lovely Bookaholic177. It's a brilliant idea, and she's running it really well, so go check that out and sign up for it! *Thumbs up* **

**Songsssssssssss in this 'ere chapter: **

**All The Small Things - Blink182 [pure love. Had the luck of seeing them live at Leeds, and this was pure EPICNESS. Just imagine it. Yes. That good]. **

**I Hate Seagulls - Kate Nash [I _love_ Kate Nash (:]**

**First Dance - NeverShoutNever! [is there one person in this entire universe who _ isn't_ totally in love with Harmony? I think not]. **

**Enjoy!**

There was dead silence. Just wondering, though, how can silence be dead? I mean, there's loads of silence. Isn't it, like, one of the most alive things... alive? Exactly. I rest my case.

Really, though, the crowd stopped jumping, and all of us guys turned to stare at Sam. He was quickly removing his guitar strap from around his neck, glaring into the crowd. Following his gaze, I saw Lissa standing very, very close to Sara, practically breathing down her neck. Sara was wide-eyed, looking scared and irritated at the same time. Guess she hasn't learned the Max Martinez approach yet... what's the Max Martinez approach, I hear you ask? Well, it's simple. If you ever feel threatened, slap everyone in sight. Much better.

Anyway, so Sam jumped down like some superhero after dumping his guitar on the stage, and made right for Lissa and Sara. Over the bar, Ella caught my eye, and raised her eyebrows quizzically. I shrugged: how the hell was I meant to know what he was doing?

He marched up to Lissa, grabbed her by the shoulders and pushed her way away from Sara. "Leave her the hell alone, you..."

"Sam!" Sara covered his mouth, though she was blushing. Lissa looked absolutely confronted, and started rubbing furiously at the shoulder he'd just touched, like it was germ-infested. When she was satisfied, she looked up and gave him a cool smile.

"Who said you could touch me?" Erm, who said he _wanted _to touch you? "It's practically assault!" Well, your face is practically defiling human eyes, and you don't hear us complaining. Much. To your face, at least - we couldn't bear to look at it.

"Oh, go cry to your daddy then," I spoke, into the microphone - not that it really mattered, since it was attracting more attention than even Iggy's Edward impression, which had quite clearly made him the laughing stock of the pub. I wouldn't be surprised if the owners offered him a comedy slot.

Lissa pointedly ignored me, even though a few people were beginning to smirk. Let's face it, she was getting verbally owned, and, if she didn't shut her big mouth and stop ruining our gig soon, physically owned too. I mean, it wasn't even our gig for her to ruin! And, really, I wanted Angel Range to get the huge reception they clearly deserved - see, I can be nice! Ha. So there.

"What'd Sara ever do?" Sam said, once Sara'd removed her hand. "What's the point in bullying her already?"

Lissa turned bright red, and Sara gazed at the floor intently.

"B-bully?" she stuttered, a little too high-pitched. "I... I was just, like, asking her to hang with me and the girls at some point. Then she acted like some idiot. God!"

Someone in the crowd sighed loudly. "GET ON WITH THE MUSIC!"

I laughed, into the microphone. "Hey, Sam, common. Let's rock her into oblivion!" I'm not quite sure that made as much sense out loud as it did in my head, but it sure sounded impressive, and the crowd seemed to think so too, if their cheering was anything to go by. I just didn't want to cause a riot.

"One sec," Sam mouthed at me, nodding, before turning around to whisper something to Sara. She smiled at him and gave him a thumbs up, then moved off to where Ella, Nudge and Amber were all getting drinks together. The crowd parted to allow Sam pass; he started moving towards the stage, then turned and waved to Amber, who just nodded warmly. Hmm.

"Sorry about that, guys," he spoke into his microphone once he was back with us, guitar newly-equipped.

"He has a hero tendency," I winked. "Anyway... oh, wait, I'm sorry. Lissa?"

Lissa, who was just stood in the middle of all the tables, looking shell-shocked, raised an eyebrow.

"Get outta here."

The crowd all laughed, right back in the palm of my hand. You see just how cool I am? I can be a total bitch to someone, and not even sound like a horrible person! Damn, I love being in a band. After one last snotty look, Lissa ran to grab Brigid by the arm (infuriatingly enough, Dr. Stupendous waved to Fangenstein!), and then slammed her way out.

"Okay, now that _she's_ gone, how about we try something we've never done before? You might have heard of it..." I grinned. "It's called All The Small Things!"

With that, the guys literally jumped into the brilliant opening riff. And ha, Dylan, Batfang didn't get one note wrong. His fingers were like lightening, fitting in easily with Sam and Dylan. The crowd all burst into applause as they recognised the song instantly: hey, it's classic Blink182! Why _wouldn't _they recognise it?

_All the, small things  
True care, truth brings  
I'll take, one lift  
Your ride, best trip_

I grinned, totally getting into the song already. Blink182 are so awesome. Those pineapple twins so ruined this song: we're gonna bring it back to the Blink style of things. Geddit?__

Always, I know  
You'll be at my show  
Watching, waiting, commiserating

Say it ain't so, I will not go, turn the lights off, carry me home  
Na, Na...

I jumped up and down with each shout, laughing out loud as practically everyone in the pub joined me, including Jamie, who'd run out into the crowd as soon as she heard the first chorus. See, this is why we started making music. This moment, right now, surrounded by my best friends, getting everyone drunk on music - _our_ music.__

Late night, come home  
Work sucks, I know  
She left me roses by the stairs  
Surprises let me know she cares

Say it ain't so, I will not go, turn the lights off, carry me home  
Na, Na...

Turning the mic to the audience, I was actually amazed when they really did shout the lyrics back to us. I thought they only did that for, like, famous bands. Who am I kidding, we're practically Hollywood-material. If Justin Bieber can make it, who can't?__

Say it ain't so, I will not go, turn the lights off, carry me home  
Keep your head still I'll be your thrill, the night will go on, my little  
redmill  
Say it ain't so, I will not go, turn the lights off, carry me home  
Keep your head still, I'll be your thrill, the night will go on, the night will  
go on, my little redmill

We finished with one last rousing chorus, and the applause was overwhelming. In a way, it was ever better than the Band Slam, because it was just that much more real. Hell, we didn't get to own Lissa when we did the Band Slam either! And I'm convinced that Lissa was only put on this planet so we can annoy the hell out of her. What other reason would anyone have to create such a bitch?

I laughed breathlessly, right into the mic, then turned to Fang and grinned. His face wasn't giving anything away, but I could see it in his eyes that he was surprised. That sounds so creepy: _I could see it in his eyes... _Wow, I'm so totally quoting Lionel Richie right now. Does that make me even cooler than I already am? I think it does.

After introducing Batfang as the noob, we launched into Shut Up by Simple Plan (who _doesn't _love them?), followed by American Idiot by Green Day (I don't even need to say anything here: it's Green Day. They speak for themselves), and we finished our set with a little bit of Young Guns, in the form of Sons of Apathy.

"THANK YOU!" Iggy screamed into his mic - which idiot gave him that? Oh, yeah, me. What was I thinking? "We've been Iggy and the Cullens, thanks for having us!"

Oh, thanks, Ig. Just ruin our entire set, why don't you. Igiot. Remind me to strangle him, and make it hurt. A lot.

"He means Metamorphic," I said darkly before following him off the stage. Preventing me from immediately turning Ig into a human punch-bag, Angel Range were all there, ready to congratulate us, and re-adjust the amps. Jamie immediately swept me into a big hug.

"You were _amazing!" _she screeched. "I mean, seriously! Goddamit, that's gonna be all they're thinking!"

"What?" Liam enquired, from where he was sat on one of the speakers tuning his acoustic guitar with an electric tuner.

"That the support totally outplayed us!" she yelled at him. "God, get a grip!" She rolled her eyes at me.

"Guys," I sympathised, grinning.

"Hey!" Dylan, Iggy, and Sam all objected at the same time from behind me.

"What about me?" Iggy asked.

"Yeah, we were talking about you, _Edwin." _Ha. Take that for a cutting reply!

"Edward," Batfang corrected, smirking.

Oh. Oops. Right, time to act cool, and pretend I totally knew that... erm... what do I say?

"I find it disturbing that you know that, quite frankly," Tom saved my ass. Him and Matt were messing about with one of the amps over by the curtains, which was why we hadn't really noticed them before-hand.

"I find it disturbing that Max didn't," Iggy butted in. WTF? "Teenage girl."

"Yeah, but look at all that hair. He's like an honorary girl, dude."

Tom is officially my favourite person at this moment in time.

Everyone except Fang burst out laughing. He just rolled his eyes. He was totally fighting a smile, though, I could tell. Stupidly, though, Dylan slapped him on the back, still laughing.

"Get off me," Fang snarled, jumping away from Dylan, eyes blazing. How the hell did that just happen?

Dylan held both his hands up in a sign of surrender, as confused as the rest of us. There was an extremely awkward silence.

"Erm..." Jamie finally spoke. "Oh, they're cheering for us! Common guys!"

Naturally, the pub was silent, and the guys weren't ready, but Jamie still danced onto the stage.

"That girl..." Liam shook his head, but his mouth was quirked upwards in a smile. Aww.

After a few moments of swearing, scuffling, and shoving, Jamie and Liam were both sat on the edge of the stage, a few metres in front of all of us. We were back out in the crowd with Ella, Nudge and everyone surrounding us. Lily even hit Ig for me! Fang was still in a bad mood, though, thanks to Dylan. God. Fangenstein's these days, really.

"Hey!" Jamie yelled into the mic, eliciting an immediate reaction of whoops from everyone. "Nice to see you guys here, we're gonna start off a little slow, okay? This is a little something called I Hate Seagulls."

The pub manager dimmed the lights as Liam started finger-picking a light tune. A few people started waving lighters in the air, illuminating Jamie's swaying body.

_I hate seagulls and I hate being sick  
I hate burning my finger on the toaster and I hate nits  
I hate falling over  
I hate grazing my knee  
I hate picking up the scab a little bit too early _

She shrugged, all cutesy, but she had everyone in there memerised, and hell did she know it. Her voice was like velvet. No, really, it was way too nice. Hmm.

I'll have to add that to my to-do list:

1. Murder Iggy.

2. Make Lissa eat evidence of afore-mentioned murder (not that there was one).

3. Cut off Fang's fringe.

4. Make Ella eat evidence of afore-mentioned ceremonial snipping.

5. Steal Jamie's voice.

_I hate getting toothache  
I hate when it's a piss-take  
I hate all the mistakes I make  
I hate rude ignorant bastards  
And I hate snobbery  
I hate anyone, who if I was serving chips wouldn't talk to me_

But 

Liam's fingers moved easily, and Jamie turned to look at him out of the corner of her eye, trying not to make it obvious...__

I have a friend, with whom I'd like to spend anytime I can find  
With ... I like sleeping in your bed  
I like knowin' what is goin' on inside your head  
I like taking time and I like your mind  
And I like when your hand is in mine  
I like gettin' drunk on the tunes by the beach  
I like pickin' strawberries  
I like cream-teas 

...But it was so totally clear that she was singing this to him, which is probably why there wasn't a dry eye in the pub. That, and her voice. Damn her.

_And I like reading ... ghost-stories  
And my heart skips a beat every time that we meet  
It's been a while and now your smile is almost like a memory  
But then you're back and I am fine 'cause you're with me  
And I'm in love with you _

A smile crept onto my face, and I found myself glancing at Dylan the way Jamie was gazing at Liam.

_And I can't find the words to make it sound unique  
But honestly you make me strong  
I can't believe I've found someone this kind  
I hope we carry on  
'cause you're so nice and I'm in love with you_

Jamie smiled as Liam trailed off gently, and they stood up to rapturous applause. Damn, they so deserve a record deal, and we're meant to hate them for that, and we can't, and... since when did I really turn into Nudge? I mean, seriously, that was just too long.

"Cheers!" Jamie grinned. The lights flickered back on, illuminating Tom and Matt, who were both stood ready to play. "Let's speed things up a little, hey?"

They threw themselves into Hello Brooklyn by All Time Low (duh!), and all of us basically got completely high off music. Excluding Iggy, since he just gets high off of anything. Seriously. Give the guy a picture of Robert Patterson, and he'll scream. No joke.

After a while, they started taking requests from fans, and, after someone tried to make them sing Bad Romance (yes, it was Nudge, and no, they didn't do it, thank God), I decided that it was time for us all to listen to something decent that we could have some fun dancing to. So, naturally, I kneed my way up to the stage, and grabbed Jamie's attention by screaming at her.

She leant down and raised her eyebrows. "'Sup?"

I love Jame, but honestly, what does she think? Of course I'm not coming to request a song, like she's been asking people to do for the last half-hour, I'm totally here to have a freakin' Twilight fan-frenzy. Or maybe, just maybe, I'm here to request a song! How did you guess?

I grinned, and whispered something to her. She laughed, and gave me the thumbs up before jumping back to centre-stage.

"So this is a little something for the lead singer of our lovely support band, Metamorphic!" she cheered along with crowd, making it even harder for me to fight my way back to the guys.

Liam and Matt slid their capos a few frets, and started playing a cheery, fast tune. Jamie winked at me as she started to sing.

_it started with your hips ,  
so I moved up to your lips .  
to take a chance ask for a dance ,  
'cause you're the cutest thing on this side of the world ._

I grinned, and made to grab Dylan's hand, but he pulled it away.

"Hey! Let's dance!" I gave him my you-will-obey-or-else glare, but he just shrugged and folded his arms. How could he _not _respond to NeverShoutNever? I mean, seriously, that's just plain wrong. Just to annoy him, I went over to Fang.

"Dance with me?"

"It's NeverShoutNever," he shrugged. I raised an eyebrow quizzically. He smiled. "That means fo' sho."

I laughed, and he grabbed my hand and twirled me around.__

we call our home ,  
yet I feel so all alone .  
Half the time we gotta live with what we got  
and I got nothing  
so agree to take my hand  
so we can conjure up something rad .

That was tough .  


We both laughed. Everyone was dancing: Nudge and Ella, Lily and Iggy, Amber and Sam, and... Sara and Dylan. Hmm. Aw, whatever, I have Fang. This is so much fun. _  
you could move on with your life ,  
just like you do .  
just like you shooby doo doo doo .  
you could make everything all right ,  
and I want you to .  
because ever since the first dance all I thought about was  
loving on you ._

He spun me around again, grinning at me. We were both hot, and sweaty, and completely drunk on music.__

So I moved to the dance floor ,  
with instincts and nothing more .  
I had ants in my pants .  
I did a boogie dance .  
and there was nothing to do but laugh :)

We both shimmied down to the floor, laughing our heads off as Ella and Nudge mirrored us, both in hysterics. __

so I took ...  
so I made another leap ,  
hoping to sweep you off your feet .  
I said "baby maybe we can bust this joint  
and see if my place is open to chill"

you could move on with your life ,  
just like you do .  
just like you shooby doo doo doo .  
you could make everything all right ,  
and I want you to .  
because ever since the first dance all I thought about was  
loving on you .

We all finished with a flourish, jumping up into the air then collapsing back onto the ground, still laughing. I even let Fangenstein hug me, which was pretty damn nice of me even if I do say so myself.

Even Dylan's glaring couldn't put a damper on the night.

Lissa managed to, the next day, though.

**A/N: (: I'm posting this at 11:15, so it's definitely within the guidelines of PULL, and I really do have an excuse for not replying to reviews at this moment: I'm going to do VAST amounts of them tomorrow morning, though, so don't sweat it, I'm _all _over it, yo. That sounded so American. I'm British, I swear - how could I be this cool and _not_ be British? Seriously. Kidding, kidding. Again: this is posted for Project PULL, check. It. Out! And, uh, while you're at it...**

**Review?**


	20. Chapter 20

**Disclaimer: I'm no mastermind. **

**A/N: (: Hey, guys! This is very late, but I know you'll understand - school's a bitch, huh? -.- Thank you so so much for the reviews - I replied! I swear I'll start replying regularly again, from now on, it's the least I can do. I mean, God, you guys, over 100 alerts? I love you. **

So, picture it: a sunny day, in December. I know, insane, huh? There really was sun, though, even though it was still practically Antarctic temperature. Typical. Thanks for being you, America.

Anyway, me and Ella were walking to school, me listening to Forever The Sickest kids on my iPhone (yes, that little 'i' is extremely important. How would you know it's pure awesomeness otherwise?), and she's just taking off her hat, and putting it back on, at a different angle. It was really quite annoying. On, off, on, off, on, off... okay, that's it.

I pulled out my headphones (just as She's A Lady came on... _that's_ how much El was annoying me) out, scowling. "What the _hell _are you doing?"

"Trying," she took it off, "to," and put it on again, "make," and off it went, "it," and on, "look," again, she grabbed it off, "good." She shoved it back on her impossibly smooth (stop judging me, Iggy) hair, then sighed and pulled it off again.

You are kidding me, right? For God's sake, it's a hat! It keeps your head warm! I mean, I still don't get what those stupid little woollen things with holes in are all about. If a hat has holes, it's not a hat. It's a holey thing that has no point in life, and makes you look like a bit of a prat, really.

Which is exactly what I told her, and you know what I got for my troubles? She stormed off. Touchy much? I was just being my typically (amazing and) kind self, trying to help her out, and she just runs off.

I watched, still strolling along, as she stomped through the gates, straight past Fang and Ig, who were waiting, and straight into school. Bloody hell, she might actually be on-time for class in the first time since... well, ever, really.

"What did you do?" Fang asked as I joined them at the gates.

"_This time,_" Ig added, smirking.

Don'cha just love best friends? Me neither.

I shrugged. "Just told her what a prat she looked like in that stupid hat thing."

Iggy looked absolutely amazed: "It's a hat?"

Me and Fang exchanged a WTF look.

"Yes, mentally challenged one, it's something you put on your head."

"Hm..." he went off into his own little world. Good God, who gave the idiot his own world? I'm terrified even _thinking _of it - just imagine the overload of Pokemon, and crappy music artists, and... ugh, I'm shuddering, I swear. "Do you think I could get one with special ear-holes for Pikachu?"

Oh, dear God. This is beyond love. This is STALKING. I mean, seriously - who the hell buys their girlfriend a hat? This is where Dylan comes running towards me with a brand-new hat, right? Ugh... well, actually, if it's one of those awesome ones with ears, like Hayley Williams', then that's okay.

Come on, Dyl, come give me the awesome hat you've inevitably bought for me! ...No? Okay, then. I won't forget this. Ever. Believe me, I really won't: once, when I was like three, Ella stole my lollipop. When I was fourteen, I stole her iPod, and made sure she knew why. What can I say? I'm practically Lord Voldemort's best friend.

"You're retarded," Fang said to Ig, in answer to his enquiry as to ear-holes.

"That hurts," Ig replied, thumping a fist against his heart. Wait, Ig has a heart? News to me.

"It was meant to," I answered for Fang, as the bell rang, laughing. Iggy's such an Igtard.

Iggy gasped, then opened his arms and smiled rather scarily at me. "Someone needs a hug..."

Let me tell you, I've never in my life ran quite so fast.

I couldn't shake his last words, though: "SEE YOU IN MATH!"

He will not be living to see the afternoon.

A minute or so after I flopped into my chair, ignoring the snickers from the slavs behind me, Fang strolled in, looking too cool once again. I'm really going to have to talk to him about that, the cool thing, I mean. It's just far too irritating. And distracting.

He sank down beside me, rolling his eyes. "And the point of that would be?"

I shrugged. "Ig's hugs are fatal."

"And you would know?"

"No, but Angel does."

Before we could argue this all out (I would've won, though, naturally), someone in front of us cleared their throat loudly. Can you even say rude? Sure, me and Batfang had just completely ignored them, but... you know what, never mind.

Looking up, I saw it was a girl far too pretty for her own good: long amber curls, blue eyes edged with hazel, and a figure that belonged to a twig. She wasn't even wearing make-up.

I hated her on sight.

Kidding, kidding (sort of). It was what she _said_ that made me hate her.

"Um, are you Max Martinez?" She spoke with a soft country twang, and I could tell Fang was watching interestedly.

"The one and only." Maybe I _was_ a little short with her, maybe that's why... oh hell, who even gives one? I can't help it if she's a bitch, you know.

"I don't know you, okay?" Nice to know she has a brain cell. "But I do know Dylan. And cheating on him with him?" she pointed at Batfang, who was wearing a look similar to mine: WTF? "That's just low. Real low."

"I-"

"I don't care," she cut in. "Why don't you go crawling back to the kennel where you belong?"

(Note to self: remember that insult.)

She threw me one last condescending glare before flicking her hair over her shoulder, and returning to a little throng of girls all laughing at something.

"What the _hell_ was _that _about?" I turned to Fang, a scowl etched into my face.

"I don't know," he said darkly, his hands curling into fists. Loose ones, but fists all the same. Oh, bloody hell, he's even more pissed off than me.

Because honestly?

I could get pissed. I was on the _edge_ of getting pissed. I mean, hell, that girl called me a bitch, all because of some stupid rumour someone was spreading? Not cool. At all. In fact, it was positively Iggy. Get it? He's the opposite of cool, so why not make him an adjective? See, cool is now Max, and uncool is Iggy! God, I need to get a life.

But at the same time, that girl just called me a bitch, because she thought I'd hurt her friend. She just yelled and insulted me, for Dylan. And you know what? That's exactly what I'd do. If anyone besides me and the guys insulted Ig, I'd punch 'em. Same for Ella, Nudge, Sam, even Batfang. The fact that she'd bother to do that is pretty cool.

Plus, that insult isn't half bad. That's going right into my book of stolen things, like Ella's 'No, I'm regular joking', and that chocolate éclair I swiped from Fang's bag when I thought no one was looking. He still doesn't know who took it, and they're his favourites as well. I know, I should be behind bars.

"Fang?" Lissa's sugary-sweet voice called from behind us, before I could somehow convince Batfang that he really didn't need to get his fringe in a twist. Batfang completely ignored her, so she got up and tottered in front of us both instead. Oh, man, really? _That_ face this early in the morning? My eyes just can't handle it.

"What?" I said, letting venom leak into my voice just right. My eyes narrowed to slits as she laughed cattily. I. Hate. Her.

"I just thought you should know that _someone_," she smirked to herself, and Fang's fists tightened, "has been sending a photo of you two around."

"Not that you'd know who, of course." My voice dripped sarcasm. No, really, it did. I like to think all that green ooze fell on Lissa's head, but of course, her face is covered in so much plastic it just dripped right off.

"Oh, I do," she said, with another annoying smile.

"Who?" I asked, forcing my voice to sound light and disinterested. It wasn't like she was going to admit it was her, anyway, even though we saw her take the picture. Igiot.

"Why don't you ask your _sister?_"

I swear, my mouth dropped open. I wasn't paying attention to anything. Which is probably why I didn't stop Fang reaching over, and punching her right in the nose.

She crumpled straight to the floor, which I thought was a bit dramatic until I saw that Fang had hit her so hard she'd passed out. Not that I wouldn't have, but...

"You igiot!" I yelled at him, ignoring the slavs galore who were all crowding around the King.

"What?" he asked, keeping his voice low even though I could see that he was flustered. Serves him right.

"What the hell did you do _that_ for?"

"Like you weren't about to."

"I was _not!_"

"Oh, please, Max," his voice was exasperated. I wonder if he could tell that every word he said was just pissing me off more and more? Probably. He's good like that. "Of course you'd defend Ella."

"Since when was this about _Ella?_" Hey, Brain? Yeah, I'm really missing you. Hawaii can't be all it's cracked up to be.

He just looked at me.

"Okay, fine," I shrugged. Not that I was wrong, or stupid, or anything. "Since when did you care so much about Ella?"

Maybe he's in love with her. Maybe he really, really likes her. For some reason, that idea just annoyed me even more.

"I-"

"What in the devil is going on here?" Before Fang could finish his confession of love for El, Mrs Davis was striding towards us, looking at Lissa with a shocked expression. By now, the King had risen... well, she'd woken up, and was feeling her nose, which now resembled a volcano. Ouch. Remind me never to get in a fight with Fangenstein.

"Fang punched her!"

"It was Fang, miss."

"He hit her really, really hard."

"Isn't that illegal?"

"I wish Justin Bieber was here... he'd know exactly what to do..."

"He's Justin Bieber, Millie," Miss said, ignoring every other shouted comment. "Of course he would." Everyone just stared at her for a moment. "I mean... Lissa, can you tell me what happened?"

Right on cue, his Majesty burst into tears, and Fang's face hit his hands. Oh, bloody hell.

"Come on, Lissa," MIss sighed, reaching down to pull Lissa up, with the help of a stricken Brigid. I have to say, the stricken look is not for her. Still, I couldn't help but feel a teeny bit relieved that she hadn't ripped Fang's head off, or marched him to the principal's office. He has a gun in there. No joke. I think it might be just for show, you know, the 'I might be old but I'm still badass and totally cool with you guys' look, but you never know.

The crowd that had gathered all sodded off as the bell went, grabbing their oversized handbags, and sashaying off to their classes. And I'm not just talking about the girls.

"You're an idiot," was I all I said to Fang as I threw my backpack on my shoulders.

"I try," he replied, the ghost of a smile playing around on his lips.

"Actually, I take that back," I said, following him out of the door. "You're an igiot."

"That's just unnecessary."

"I try."

We continued arguing like this all the way to English, not even noticing Miss laughing at us. Hey, I was winning! You really think I'm going to give up my crown just to acknowledge a teacher? ...I see your point.

"You two," she shook her head at us, smiling. "Do you ever stop arguing?"

"We're not arguing, Miss," I replied with a sugary-sweet smile. "I'm just explaining why I'm right."

She cracked up, and Fang nodded.

"Shame you're always wrong, then."

"Shut it, Fangenstein."

"Whatever, dwarf."

"I'M NOT SHORT! I'M VERTICALLY CHALLENGED!"

"Sure."

"I am."

"Didn't say you weren't, gnome."

"Oh my God, leave me alone!"

He just smiled at me. A real, full smile. And the world didn't fall down. The butterflies in my stomach woke up, though, let me tell you.

"Sit down," Miss ordered after a moment of me standing there staring like an Iggy. "And keep it down, okay?"

I mumbled an affirmative, then raced to my seat as quickly as I could. Fang sent me a WTF look, strolling leisurely to his own, the one next to me. Just as he was about to sit down, I pulled the seat out from under him, and he went flying to the ground. How's _that_ for smooth?

"Now who's short?" I managed to gasp out between hysterical giggles.

"Still you," he replied darkly. I guess he hadn't realised that his fringe was a complete mess. I'm sure he has nightmares about his hair getting cut off. Just you wait, Batfang.

"Oh, leave me-"

"Nick Ride?" The secretary stood at the door, looking at Batfang and I disapprovingly. Fang raised a hand, trying to look dignified from the floor, and I had to stifle another giggle. I mean, honestly. Even the freaking Queen of England would look like Iggy on a good day on the floor. "The principal would like to see you."

Fang looked down at the floor for a moment, then heaved himself up and slung his bag over his shoulders. He didn't catch my eye as he walked around me, just smacked the top of my head. Not lightly, either. Oh, my revenge shall hurt. Hang on, if that's his revenge for me making him look like an igiot, then this is my revenge for him hitting me, then he'll have to get revenge... it's going to be never-ending circle of revenge!

My brain's in Hawaii, cut me some slack.

After about twenty minutes of me sitting there thinking my retarded thoughts, the secretary appeared again.

"Maximum?" she looked straight at me. Rude much? I mean, we did see an awful lot of each other last year, but you'd think she'd want to have a fresh start, wouldn't you? Secretaries these days. Really. "Come on."

Rolling my eyes, I grabbed my bag, and followed her out of the door. As I'd expected, she led me to the principal's office, and motioned me to a seat outside. Lovely. Not even a 'Wait there, please'. She's obviously a big fan of mine. Not.

So I just sat there, doing nothing, for fifteen minutes. There's just not enough to look at. If they installed, I don't know, a Lord of the Rings mural featuring Orlando Bloom's rather good-looking face, it'd be much better. You know? Why don't we just go for it, and employ Orlando to stand there and welcome people inside? Sure, it might cost a couple of million dollars every hour, but at least it gives us all something nice to look at.

Right while I was in the middle of figuring out how I could kidnap Orlando without giving away the fact that I was stalking him (personally, I don't think he'd mind. I'd be an _awesome_ stalker to have. But the paparazzi might see it a little differently), Fangenstein strolled out of Principal Brown's office, looking calm and cool as ever. Have I not spoken to him about that yet? It's so annoying.

Before I could kick him where it hurts for being too smooth, though, Sir poked his head out of his office door. "Martinez? Come in, please." Martinez? WTF? Since when was this, like, Hogwarts? Whatever.

I didn't even have the chance to ask Batfang what he'd told him! Oh, shit. I'm going to mess this all up, and Mum's going to behead me for getting us all in trouble. She couldn't give much of a shit about me, but she actually likes Fangenstein, for some unknown reason. I'm kidding. Sort of.

"'Sup, Sir?" Not the best way to start off this conversation, apparently, judging by the glare he sent me.

"You know exactly _'sup_, Maximum."

I swear, he said 'sup. People over the age of eighteen just should not do that. I wish the PA was on then. So bad.

"I can feel an elaboration coming on, Sir. Bring it." Again, probably not my brightest moment.

"This is not the time for your infantile jokes, Maximum. Your friend could be in some serious trouble."

"Friend? You mean arch-enemy, Sir. We're going to have an epic battle that dictates who's going to rule the world. Of course, everyone knows I'm going to win, but I figured I'd humour him."

Sir just sighed. I guess that was kind of what he meant when he said 'infantile jokes'. Hey, my jokes aren't infantile! They're totally intellectual. If you want infantile, go see Mr Iggy Cullen.

"Tell me what happened this morning, please. In your own words." Well, who else's could I use?

"See, the thing is, Sir, Lissa has a rather large nose."

He looked at me kind of incredulously. "Yes, and?" Hahahaha, he thinks Lissa has a big nose. How rude. And inappropriate, especially at this moment in time. I mean, God, Fang could be in some serious trouble!

"And, as you might know, rather large things tend to have a gravitational pull."

"Are you trying to tell me that Nick's hand was pulled towards Lissa's nose, because it was big enough to warrant a gravitational pull?"

I smiled sweetly. "Nice to know we're on the same page here, Sir."

He muttered something that sounded suspiciously like 'Absolutely bloody ridiculous. What does she take me for?' and just glared at me. Well, Sir, to be completely honest, I take you for a stupid man with too many bald spots, a rather fat stomach, and a life that shouldn't really exist. I don't think that's quite what he's looking for, though, somehow. Eh. Teachers. They ask questions they don't want to know the answers to. Actually, that's just grown-up's in general. Igiots, the lot of them.

"What did F-Nick tell you then?" And Fnick makes a return appearance. I _was_ honestly curious, though.

"That he missed a high-five."

Maybe it was the matter-of-fact way he said it in. Maybe it was just the fact that holding in laughter this long was already straining me. Maybe it was just that it was genuinely funny.

Whatever it was, I burst out laughing.

Sometimes, I'm really glad that Fang's my best friend. Or arch-enemy. Whichever way you want to see it, I'm glad he's in my life, even if he is an annoying, too cool igiot half the time. He's awesome with it.

**A/N: I originally started this chapter with a completely different direction in mind, so I'm surprised - and pleased - with how it turned out. I think the reason it was so hard to write in the beginning was because my idea in the beginning was pretty crap anyway, so hey! (: I hope you guys like it, and I really am sorry for the lateness. At least it's here, right? I haven't forgotten you, I promise. **

**20th chapter, maybe we can reach 400 reviews? We're only 3 off! (: It'd be incredible if we could. I love you guys. **

**Revieweth? [It needed spicing up. I'm a nerd, I know.]**


	21. Chapter 21

**Disclaimer: Girl. Man. Difference. **

**A/N: I love you. Really. You, right there, sat there reading this on your computer screen. Even if it's a PC. [I think I'll leave it to you to interpret that one.] (: Really, though, the level of support is amazing, and it just makes my day. I'm sorry it's late, I'm not going to bother you with excuses. On a side-note, WHO LOVES TAYLOR SWIFT'S NEW ALBUM? I'm addicted, so definitely expect a few songs from there in the next few chapters - any favourites you guys would like me to include? Oh, and I just bought tickets to see her live. 2011 is so shaping up for me, concert-wise - Paramore in a couple of weeks (!), Kerrang! in February, then Taylor in March. Oh yes.**

In the end, he made me and Fang sit outside, with express orders NOT TO TALK, or we'd be in EVEN MORE TROUBLE than we ALREADY were, until lunch, when he told us that we had to be back here, ON THE BELL, or die. Well, something to that effect, at least.

"Nice going, Batfang," I glared at him as we walked to the hall.

He glanced sideways at me, not really concentrating. "What?"

I just sighed irritably. "I hate you."

"You wish you could."

"Oh, for God's sake, will you just shut up?"

He glanced at me again, surprised at my really pissed-off tone. "What?"

"You just got me into a shitload of trouble, which I could really do without!" I stopped in the middle of the hallway (which was deserted anyway), so I could yell at him properly. "Do you even know how much trouble I got in last year?"

"Yeah," someone said from behind us. "We thought she was practically dating Principal B." Turning round, I realised all the guys were right behind us, minus Ig, thank God. Typical.

"Thought you were already in the hall?" I asked, ignoring Sam's comment. It wasn't that bad. Really. I just... tripped a few times... around Lissa... with my fists in the air... um... yeah.

"We decided that we'd come help you out," Ella said, speeding up to walk in front of us. She then turned around to look at us again, walking backwards. I wonder if I could direct her into that trophy cabinet... "'Cos we're just lovely people."

"I've only been with you a few days," Sara commented, "and I already think you're the most retarded people ever."

"We try," Sam rolled his eyes. "You can hardly talk, anyway."

"And what the hell," Sara replied, narrowing her eyes scarily, "is that meant to mean?"

Sam laughed. "You had practically had an aneurysm over whether to get the pink or orange hockey stick."

Sara considered for a moment, before smiling. "Oh, okay."

Oh dear God. She amazes me sometimes, she really does. She goes from Ice Queen, to Freakily Happy Anime Kid. Well, I guess she is Nudge's cousin. What did I expect?

Ella, still walking backwards, was watching me closely.

"Are you alright?" she asked, suddenly. I met her eyes (and no, not literally).

"Do you know why Fang punched Lissa?"

"I figured he tripped," Ella shrugged, looking confused.

"He was testing gravity," I said briefly, "but that's not the point. The point is why."

Ella just looked at me. "Care to elaborate?"

"He punched her, because she said you were spreading a picture." I said it slowly, pronouncing every word very clearly. Wow, I sounded serious.

"I've not done anything," Ella replied, imitating my tone.

"Look, if you ha-" Fang stopped me, gently placing one of his over-large, warm hands on my shoulder. Needles immediately stabbed me all over my arm. But in a good way.

"Leave it," he said quietly.

"Oh, I'm sorry," I threw his hand off, glaring. "I forgot that you were in love with El. God forbid I might actually want to know what the hell's going on!"

Okay, that came out a little bit angrier than I expected... oops? Erm...

"Max," Ella said eventually, sounding a bit shocked, which was fair enough, really. I _had_ just exploded in the middle of the corridor, which wasn't unheard of for me, but normally they get a good hour warning (generally consisting of me punching some randomer who had the nerve to brush against my bag, and growling at everyone. And yes, really growling. The 'Grr' growl. I'm not ashamed). "Are you alright?"

I was painfully aware that we'd all just stopped walking, and everyone was listening to our... disagreement. Ah well, I'm going to try and handle the situation maturely, and make sure this whole issue is resolved as quickly as possible.

"For God's sake, guys, what's with the staring? Have I suddenly grown a second head?"

"Well, if you have," Sam said, trying to be somewhat diplomatic, "it's practically minuscule, because I can't see it."

"That's what she said," Ig came strolling up, hand-in-hand with Lily and with a grin plastered all over his face. His camera was, as always nowadays, in his other hand, recording. Oh God, what's he blown up now?

Lily pulled her hand away from his, and slapped his arm, but didn't say anything as she stopped in front of us.

"They've just spent all day in Brown's office and that's all you can think of to say?" Ella, on the other hand, was a little more vocal. "God, I was so right when I called you a butt-trumpet. Where've you been, anyway?"

Iggy shrugged, choosing to ignore her very true comments about the trumpet qualities of his derrière. "Call from the Mafia."

Me and Fang exchanged a confused look. I forgot I was mad at him for a second, okay? God.

"The Mafia?" WTF?

"Well, you remember the day I got that call from those terrorists?"

Realisation dawned on Fang and I. That prank call... oh my God.

"Wait, Iggy..." Lily interrupted his explanation whilst trying to dodge his camera. "You told me it was your Dad..."

"I just didn't want to worry you," he replied with a smirk. "This is all very serious stuff."

Yeah, right. Of course. That obviously explains why, after the first call, he was cowering on the floor, hugging a teddy. Mmmhmm.

"Whatever." Ella flipped her hair over her shoulder in a very Ella-like way, then linked arms with Nudge, and marched her off. Poor Luke, Nudge's boyfriend, was just left staring after her. They'd been having a conversation, you see... I say conversation; really, Nudge was just talking at him.

"She's so moody lately," Iggy pulled a face after her. Typically, just as he did, Ella turned back.

"Sara, are you-F**** OFF, IGGY."

I signalled to Sam, and he saluted before reaching over, and smacking the back of Ig's neck. Ella was long gone by then, Sara having had thrown us an apologetic look as she scurried off after them. Luke cleared off too, once he realised it was either find his real friends, or hang out with retarded idiots all lunch. I am, of course, excluding myself there.

In the end, just me, Fangenstein, Sam, Iggy and Lily went to grab lunch; unsurprisingly, Ella and the others were nowhere to be seen. Well, it would've been a bit stupid, storming off just to go sit at our normal table and eat lunch with us all.

...Not that I've ever done that, or anything.

"What've we got last?" I asked Batfang, halfway through a mouthful of my second plate of pasta. I like food, okay? Get over it.

He just looked at me. Oh yeah, we were probably going to get sus... wait. Hang on. I'M MEANT TO BE MAD AT HIM! God_damn_it. How do I always forget? I stood up suddenly, grabbed my plate, and moved to sit next to Sam.

Hmph. Take that, Batfang.

"My lady," Sam gave me a sarcastic smile.

"Nice to know Legolas really has been showing you the rules of the army, eh?" I grinned.

Sam laughed. "Oh, yeah. Mentioned you a lot, he did. Seems to really like you."

"And that's just how you get yourself promoted!"

"All thanks to old Leggy, that is. Really showed me around, uh, everything."

Ig looked up, and nodded understandingly. "That's what she said."

As I was opposite him, I leaned over, planted my hands in the back of his head, and pushed. Oh, don't you just love macaroni cheese days? While he was still trying to get the cheese off of his face, I picked up Cassie - the camera - and made sure it was all recorded.

"I'm joining Fang's army," he announced spitefully, after he'd fully rubbed his face down with several napkins, with Lily's help. She's too good for him.

"Go ahead," I grinned, and turned to Fang. "Congratulations. You've gained an igiot."

He looked at Iggy. "Must you?"

"I must," he replied gravely.

I held my hand up, and Sam slammed a high-five. "I think we're now guaranteed a victory."

"No way," Fangenstein protested, and pointed at Iggy. "Science whizz, remember?"

Predictably, Iggy looked behind him, before realising it was him, and puffed his chest up, smiling proudly. "Yes. That would be me."

Before anyone could correct him (and rightfully brand him as a true Igtard), the bell rang. I stood up quickly, shoving my plate on top of Sam's. He grinned, and slapped me on the back.

"Good luck."

I nodded solemnly. "Let Legolas know what's happened, if I can't make it tonight."

"What's tonight?" Fangenstein asked, grabbing his bag.

I turned to him, smiling in what I like to think was a mysterious manner. "That is for us to know..."

"And you to find out." Sam finished. Finally, someone of my intelligence level! I know you're all making a joke about Ig and I being the same, uh... clever-ness (oh, shut up), so quit it. Right now. Seriously.

"I'M GOING TO MISS YOU!" Iggy yelled, before grabbing us all in a massive group hug, then sprinting off before we could murder him.

I just looked at Lily. "Why?"

She shrugged, giggling. "Not a clue."

"Coming, Max?" Fangenstein called, from where he was stood waiting.

I turned to join him, but Lily stopped me with a tap on my shoulder. "Hey, Max?"

"'Sup?" Thank God I managed to refrain from punching her in the face. See, my self-control is totally improving!

"D'you mind if I walk home with you tonight? I only live a street away from you guys."

I smiled. "Sure. We'll ditch old Batty, too. Seeya later, 'kay?" She nodded, and I strode through the door Batfang was holding for me.

"We're dead," he said, once we were walking through the corridors.

"Where did this 'we' come from?" I asked. "_You_ punched her!"

"Yeah, before you could," he replied, his lips twitching.

"I..." I stopped, realising there was nothing I could say, really. "...Fair enough."

He smiled, fully, and was about to reply, when we saw Lissa. And she was not alone. She was, in fact, cornering Sara. Again.

I decided to handle the situation as maturely as possible. I would not, of course, run in, shove her up against the wall, and hold my fist to her face.

Of course not.

So, once I'd done that, I snarled, "Stay away from her. And my sister." God, I look so cool right now. If only Brown had taken me seriously when I suggested they hire Orlando to spice up the hall - he'd totally be sweeping me into his arms right now.

I waited for an answer, glaring at her.

"Uh... Max?" Sara gave me a weird look. "I don't think she can breathe..."

"So? She doesn't need to breathe!" ...Brain? I could really use you, right about now.

"Max," Batfang came up behind me and pushed me away with surprising strength. GRRRRRRRRR. I hate having a ridiculously strong best friend. He just ruins everything. "Are you okay, Lissa?"

She made a great show of coughing and spluttering, and motioned to her throat as if she couldn't respond.

"If you'd just like to lie on the floor, that'll help," I said with a smile.

Fang looked at me. "Kicking her won't help."

I gave him my angelic grin. "It'll do wonders for her face."

Unfortunately, Lissa wasn't quite as trusting as Brigid was with her lovely cup of coffee. Once she was done with her theatrics, she put her hands on her hips and tried to glare. Typically, she got her fake eyelashes stuck together.

"Shit!" she screamed, rubbing madly at her eyes and just rubbing the glue in further. All three of us cracked up laughing, even Fangenstein, her number one fan. "This is all your fault, Max!"

Then she ran off, sobbing manically to herself.

All in a good day's work, eh?

"You okay?" I asked Sara, once we'd managed to get over our laughing fit. If only I'd had my phone out. That'd get a million views on YouTube, I bet. It's better than the shit Ig puts up any day.

She grinned. "I'm good. I was fine anyway! I am Sart, after all."

I raised an eyebrow. "Sart?"

"Sara and smart," she explained.

I couldn't resist: "You sure it's not Sara and tart?"

"Igshit!"

She gasped, and slapped me, so I slapped her back, and it went on like that for a while. What? It's my most mature argument!

I was about to knock her out when someone tapped me on the back. Thinking it was Batfang, I turned around, and smacked him right in the face.

Except it wasn't Fangenstein.

Of course it wasn't.

"Hi, Principal B," I said weakly. "Um... my hand slipped?"

He glared at me. No appreciation for good humour these days, I swear. "My office. Now."

...Then again, punching him in the face probably wasn't the best way to convince him of my innocence.

He stormed off, and I followed. As I passed Fangenstein, who, like a typical goody two-shoes (I've never gotten that expression. How are two shoes good? Apart from the obvious... oh, never mind), was sat right outside Sir's office, he mouthed 'Good luck'. I rolled my eyes and shut the door behind me, adopting an obvious swagger for some reason.

"Sit down now Maximum, and stop acting like... like..." Sir tailed off at the end.

"An Igiot?" I grinned infuriatingly. Oh, it's fun winding him up, it really is. Highlight of my entire school life.

He turned bright red. "SIT. DOWN."

I rolled my eyes, and sat down slowly on one of the plastic chairs in front of his desk. I leaned forward, folded my arms on his desk, and rested my head on them. "'Sup?"

He closed his eyes, and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Maximum Martinez, I'll expel you right now if you don't sit up, I swear to God, I will."

"Alright, alright, don't get your knickers in a twist," I laughed, and sat back, crossing my legs and folding my arms again, normally.

He breathed out carefully. "Right, Maximum," I started tapping loudly. He ignored me. "You're aware that we started talking earlier this morning, aren't you?"

OBVIOUSLY, I was kind of THERE? Ugh. I started humming along with my taps, ignoring him. He still ignored me.

"I want you to tell me what happened, with no infantile jokes-" I started stomping along to the beat. "-and no funny business."

In the end, he walked out, to talk to Fang. I think it was when I stood up on the chair, and started singing 'I'M A GOOFY GOOBER' at the top of my voice, that he fully lost it. Ah, Principal Brown, I love you. Not in that way, Ig.

The igiot had just left me alone, in his office. So, naturally, the first thing I did was go to lock his door. Then, I went to root about in the files on his desk.

Unfortunately, they were all bills for his monthly head wax and shine. Typical.

Hang on... is that the PA? Oh my God. I can't... who am I kidding, I'm Max Martinez! Of course I can.

"Hello?" I pressed the button down, and spoke into it. "This is a very important announcement. Could Lissa Scott please be aware she is a massive bitch? Thank you."

I thought it was hilarious, but, judging from the shouting from outside (Principal B screaming at the secretary to get him the spare office keys, and she replying that they were in his office, with the others), Principal B didn't particularly agree.

Shame, that.

**[ X X X ]**

"We've both been suspended for two weeks, starting tomorrow," I told Lily as we walked home. "And then it's the holidays, so we've basically just got four weeks off."

She sighed. "Oh, Max... What are you gonna do?"

I snorted. "Do? Nothing. Unless you count annoying the hell out of old Batty twenty-four seven."

Lily laughed, and nodded. We walked in a comfortable silence for a minute or so, before she said: "Um, Max?"

"'Sup?"

She pulled her hat (a real hat, unlike Ella's holey thing) down a little further, looking uncomfortable. "...Did you notice once that Dylan wasn't with us, for all of today?"

"He wasn't?" ...Shit. I swear, he was! At lunch, I sat with... oh. I sat with Fang, Sam, Ig and Lily... but then, in the morning... no, he wasn't there either... oh, shit.

Lily shook her head sadly. "Nope. He was with some other girls."

For some reason, that didn't bother me in the slightest. If it had been Batfang, I would've both furious and hurt, but with Dylan, it's like... meh. That's a mood, now, by the way.

I shrugged. "Cool."

Lily looked at me closely. "Max, if you really do like him... shouldn't that bother you?"

"I... yeah, yeah it should." But it doesn't. And... maybe I don't.

"Max..."

"Yeah?"

"If it had been Fang-"

I didn't let her finish her sentence. "Yeah, I would've been bothered."

Lily ran a hand through her strawberry hair, then stopped walking altogether. "Look, Max, I'm not saying dump Dylan for Fang, 'cos I know how close you and Fang are, but, um..."

I smiled sadly. "It's not fair on Dylan."

She shook her head. "I think you should end it."

"I think I will," I said. Oh, God. Subject change time. NOW. "How's it with Ig, then?" I asked, as we resumed walking.

To my surprise, Lily grimaced, then tried to cover it with an easy smile. "Oh, good!"

I fixed her with my you-will-tell-me glare. "Spill."

She sighed. "I really like him, but... I don't think I can deal with the whole YouTube thing."

I bit my lip. "That stuff's all really important to him."

"I know! I just... I don't know... maybe it'll pass." She smiled again, obviously closing the subject.

"Boys."

"Tell me about it!"

"Tits, the lot of 'em."

**A/N: (: Hope you liked it. I realise this should've been up yesterday, for Project PULL, but after a 12 hour car journey home [I went on holiday], I just wanted to collapse in bed. Cut me some slack, eh? (: **

**Oh, and 'cos I ALWAYS forget to mention it, if you ever have any ideas, or songs you'd like me to include, feel free to mention it, and I'll do my best. (: **

**I tried to reply to all the reviews, but I did half one night, and forgot where I was up to, so sorry if I thought I'd already replied and hadn't. /: I suck, I know. **

**Revieweth?**


	22. Chapter 22

**Disclaimer: Do I really have to do this AGAIN? **

**A/N: (: Thank you all, very much, over 450 reviews? Insanity. And, just a side-note, I really am trying to get as many of Taylor's new songs I can into the next few chapters. (: This is a little fluffy chapter, and guess what? There's definitely something in there that you've all be waiting for... I hope you like it! **

**Songs: **

**Long Live, by Taylor Swift. [I LOVE THIS SONG. So much.]**

"I'm so bored."

"Go do something then."

"No, it's you. You're just plain boring."

"Go, then."

"God, Fang, you're so boring."

"I think we've established that."

"Everything about you is boring. Your face, your mind, your FRINGE."

"I like my fringe."

"_You _would!" I rolled my eyes, smiling despite myself. "I think we should name it."

His eyes widened with disbelief. "I can't believe you just said something so... so..."

"Iggy?" I offered.

He smiled. "That's the word."

"I really think it deserves a name, though." I looked up at him from my lying position on the floor of his bedroom. It was the first day of our suspension, the day before Nudge's party, the day I was planning to break up with Dylan - whatever you want to call it. I like Friday, to be honest. Unfortunately, I also had to spend it with Fang, who was the most boring person on the universe.

"I'm thinking not," he rolled his eyes in response to the idea of the naming of his fringe. He was sat in front of his laptop in a swivel chair, spinning round as we spoke. I'd tried to throw him off, but he apparently has a preference for those chairs, and wouldn't get the hell out of it.

"No, no, it definitely needs a name..." I considered.

His face met his palm. "Why are we friends?"

"Your life would be boring without me," I said briefly, before snapping my fingers. "Got it!"

He rolled his eyes again. "What?"

I smiled sweetly. "Mary."

"To hell am I calling my fringe Mary."

"Yes, you are."

"No way."

"Be quiet, Batty."

"Stop calling me that."

"Never. Shut up."

"What are you doing?"

I just grinned as I retrieved paper, and a black Sharpie from his desk drawers. I tore a rectangle out of the paper, and scrawled something on, in block capitals. I then grabbed the one grip I used, to keep my hair the hell out of my eyes (unlike some people I could mention, I don't have a ridiculously long and emo-looking fringe), and clipped it to one side.

"C'mere," I said to Fang.

He backed away. "No way."

"C'mere," I said again, stepping closer.

He tried to step away again, forgetting that his desk was directly behind him. "Shit."

I grinned, leaning over him to clip the little name-tag to his fringe. Excellent. Then the sparks started erupting all over my body, and I realised I was pressed up against his chest. Blushing madly, I pulled away swiftly.

"Perfect," I said, trying to disguise the weird feelings I got whenever we touched.

He glared darkly at me. "I hate you."

"Oh, thanks!" I laughed. "That's what I get for helping your poor fringe out?"

He shook his head, but I could see the half-smile there. Stop shaking, knees, it's just a freaking smile! A killer one, sure, but that's... that's... unimportant. Yes. Unimportant.

Fangenstein spun himself back around, to face his desk, and booted his laptop up. Not literally, of course.

"Wha'cha doing?" I asked, grabbing one of the black beanbag chairs and slumping down beside him.

He typed his password in record time. Since when did Batfang do a lot of typing? Hmm. "Checking my email."

"Fine then, if that's how it is!" I turned around, so my back was to him, and folded my arms.

He glanced at me distractedly. "What now?"

"Hmph." I went to check the time on my watch, then realised I'd left it off after showering this morning. "What time is it?"

He muttered something that sounded suspiciously like 'Typical', tapped a button, and said, "Half two."

"Cool," I replied. "I want to go meet... someone at school."

He raised his eyebrows. "If it's Dylan, you can tell me."

WHY DID HE IMMEDIATELY JUMP TO THAT? I mean, it's not like he CARES, or anything. RIGHT? ...Erm. I got a little... worked up? Not dramatic, or anything.

"What's with you and Dylan, anyway?" I asked.

"What do you mean?" he said, slowly, typing his email address in.

I shrugged. "It's like you hate him."

"It's complicated."

That sounded final. Do you think that was final? I think it was. I'm just not going to talk.

A moment of silence later, he nudged me with his elbow. "Check this out. It was sent to both of us."

Huffing, I shoved him and his stupid swirly chair out of the way. He went flying, but what do I care? Cue evil smiles. And a lot of giggling.

**TO: Fang 'Nick' Ride; Max Martinez.**

**FROM: Kathy Grayson. **

**SUBJECT: Music Assessment. **

**Max/Nick, **

**Your classwork for the two weeks you are suspended is simple: you should be aware that our current topic is performing. I realise that for this topic, many of you prefer to work in small groups. In accordance with this, you two shall be an automatic pair. As you are both suspended, I would like you to record a video of your performance. You may use any instruments, including singing. If you would like to perform separately, please make this clear in your videos, and if you have enquiries/problems, please email me. Alternately, if either of you own a pen, you could actually write a letter, however I doubt this, as in Max's words, that's SO last century. **

**I look forward to seeing and marking your video/s. **

**Mrs Grayson**

I turned to Fang, only one question going through my head: "How the _hell_ did she get our personal emails?"

He chuckled, pushing himself back over until he was sat right next to me. "God knows."

"I'm going to log into mine," I said, already typing my email in. Why would I bother to ask permission? I am Max Martinez, after all.

He rolled his eyes, then said sarcastically, "Feel free."

Ooh, three new emails. I'm _so_ popular. I bet there's one from Orlando Bloom in there somewhere... oh, shit.

**TO: Max Martinez**

**FROM: Valencia Martinez**

**SUBJECT: America.**

**Max;**

**I hope you and Fang are checking your emails today, I gave them both to the school for you (no need to thank me). Just letting you know that the company is flying me to America for the next week or so (they're opening a new branch over there that they want me to kick-start). I've already agreed that you and Ella will be able to join me on the Monday, and, as an apology for not being here this weekend, you can each bring a friend too, as long as it's okay with their parents (if you're really determined, I might be able to get both Fang and Iggy along, since I'm assuming you'll want them both). I know you're staying Saturday night and Sunday at Nudge's, so could you please stay with the Rides' tonight? I've already cleared it with Jane, so too bad. **

**Don't act like yourself, please, Jane's doing me a favour.**

**I've emailed Ella, so she'll probably have read it an hour before I sent it - she's staying with Nudge for the next 3 days (I hope her ears will be intact when she gets back). **

**Love you, dear, have a good weekend! (And do the homework you've been sent.)**

**Mum**

I turned to Fang, who was reading over my shoulder. "Brilliant."

He glanced at me, still finishing. "What?"

"I have to spend the whole night with you retards!" I groaned.

He chuckled, then switched the laptop off and rolled himself back a little so he could look at me. "Plenty of time to work on our music thing, then, right?"

"Oh, that," I smiled. "I already know what we're doing."

"Nice to know you've discussed this with me."

I laughed. "We've got half an hour until we need to go to school. Want me to teach you?"

"Sure."

I grabbed a piece of paper, and wrote down the song. "YouTube this. I'll be right back."

I ran home, let myself in, and grabbed Amy from my room. I started to go downstairs, then realised I'd have to tune her before going back. Hey, no way am I asking Batfang to do it! After tuning her, I set off downstairs, before realising I didn't have a pick. I grabbed one, checked that there was NOTHING else, because it was beginning to piss me off, then actually left the house, certain that there was nothing else.

About halfway down the drive, I remembered the music.

Oh, for crying out loud. This is beyond funny.

"Hey," I said, running into Fangenstein's room again, around twenty minutes later. I fell up the stairs, okay? That takes some serious talent, don't deny it.

"Hey," he smiled from his bed, where he was messing about with his - admittedly gorgeous - black acoustic guitar. "Don't worry about the music, I've got it pretty much nailed. And would you mind using one of my new picks? Sorry, I'm trying to wear them in a little. I have an electric tuner, too, if you want to borrow it."

Oh. My. God.

Forty-one words from Batty. It's a miracle. That's just so typical, though.

It's not funny. It's not even mildly amusing. I mean, for God's sake. Why me?

"As if I'm going to use your retarded picks," I growled, shoving him aside as I sank down beside him.

He just rolled his eyes, deciding, wisely, not to push it any further. Aw, that's quite nice of him, actually. "So that's what you ran back for."

I take it all back. Retard.

"Oh, shut up," I said intelligently, unzipping Amy and pulling her out.

Impressed, Fang whistled. "Nice."

"She's called Amy," I informed him. "Forget it, and die. By the hands of my army."

He laughed quietly. "Did you bring the music, anyway?"

In way of reply, I threw the rolled-up sheets at his head. It narrowly missed the lovely name-tag that was still attached to dear old Mary.

Surveying it for a few minutes, Fang nodded. "Pretty much what I got, though I got that G as a Cadd9."

I shrugged. "We'll try both."

"Want to try?" he glanced at me, a smile pricking the corner of his mouth.

I don't think I've ever seen him this relaxed before. It's... interesting. At least, the butterflies dancing in my stomach seemed to think so, since they were so damn desperate to get outta me that I almost felt sick.

To somewhat describe the fact that I was... um... mentally photographing his face for the last thirty seconds, I strummed the first chord. He joined in easily, and I smiled.

_I said remember this moment  
In the back of my mind  
The time we stood with our shaking hands  
The crowds in stands went wild  
We were the kings and the queens  
And they read off our names  
The night you danced like you knew our lives  
Would never be the same  
You held your head like a hero  
On a history book page  
It was the end of a decade  
But the start of an age  
_

Fang grinned at me, and I remembered that this was his first time hearing me play Amy. Well, I am awesome.

_Long live the walls we crashed through  
All the kingdom lights shined just for me and you  
I was screaming, "long live all the magic we made"  
And bring on all the pretenders  
One day we will be remembered_

You know, if Fang and I ever, you know, formed an alliance, this could be our song. Except we don't like each other in that way. It'd be in a friendship kind of way, of course. __

I said remember this feeling  
I passed the pictures around  
Of all the years that we stood there on the sidelines  
Wishing for right now  
We are the kings and the queens  
You traded your baseball cap for a crown  
When they gave us our trophies  
And we held them up for our town  
And the cynics were outraged  
Screaming, "this is absurd"  
'Cause for a moment a band of thieves  
In ripped up jeans got to rule the world

...A friendship kind of way. It would. I don't like him that way. Even when he's giving me that killer half-smile like right now, and my voice is going a little bit wavery because the butterflies are driving me insane... and making me think like Nudge.__

Long live the walls we crashed through  
All the kingdom lights shined just for me and you  
I was screaming, "long live all the magic we made"  
And bring on all the pretenders  
I'm not afraid

Long live all the mountains we moved  
I had the time of my life  
Fighting dragons with you  
I was screaming, "long live the look on your face"  
And bring on all the pretenders  
One day we will be remembered

The time of my life, with Fang? Of course not. Not at all. Oh, crap, he's smiling again... __

Hold on to spinning around  
Confetti falls to the ground  
May these memories  
Break our fall

And you take a moment  
Promise me this:  
That you'll stand by me forever  
But if God forbid fate should step in  
And force us into a goodbye  
If you have children someday  
When they point to the pictures  
Please tell them my name  
Tell them how the crowds went wild  
Tell them how I hope they shine

I don't like Fang! I don't! I really, really don't! When I said this could be our song, I meant... oh, I don't know what I meant. Go bother someone else. __

Long live the walls we crashed through  
I had the time of my life with you

Long, long live the walls we crashed through  
All the candlelight shined just for me and you  
And I was screaming, "long live all the magic we made"  
And bring on all the pretenders  
I'm not afraid

...This is ridiculous. I... oh, he's looking at me, and his eyes are blazing... and... __

Singing long live all the mountains we moved  
I had the time of my life  
Fighting dragons with you

And long, long live the look on your face  
And bring on all the pretenders  
One day we will be remembered

We both finished quietly, eyes locked. Oh, bloody hell. I just liked the song! It wasn't some big statement to him! Honest! Oh, God.

"Max..." he said softly. If he didn't look so serious, I'd have definitely taken the piss, but his eyes were burning, and he was leaning towards me, and I couldn't move, and my thoughts had gone all Nudge-like and I didn't even care because then he was kissing me.

Kissing Fang... everything went a little bit insane. My lips tingled against his, and he smelt like coffee and breathe mints, and... Fang-ness. The butterflies all rejoiced, battering against my poor stomach, and when he ran his long fingers through my hair my senses kind of went into over-drive.

...Bloody hell.

I'm not going to lie, I thoroughly... hated it. Really, I did. It was horrible. Fang's lips were disgusting and just BLEGH, not soft and sweet and Fang-like and- I'm sorry. I got a little carried describing the things he's not. Definitely not.

Because I don't like Batfang like that. At all. Not in the slightest.

I probably would've stayed kissing him way past four o'clock if that stupid name-tag hadn't gotten in the way. Mary, tired of her brilliantly made name-tag (if I do say so myself), chucked it straight at my head (or something to that effect... you could use the words fell out, but that's just plain boring, like Ig's face). Needless to say, it speared me traumatically, and I pulled back.

That's about when my brain arrived back from it's life-long vacation in Hawaii.

Oh. My. God. I've just kissed Fang. FANG. Batfang. Fangenstein.

HOLY SHIT I KISSED A GIRL!

...Kidding. Sort of. So maybe my brain didn't return. At least not fully.

So I did what any girl faced with that situation would've done. I jumped up, and said, "Oh, hey, look at the time! Better go! Bye!"

And ran straight out of his house.

Oops.

I don't know why more people don't have mental health issues. Thinking is one of the most stressful things I've ever come across.

**A/N: It's a TINY bit shorter than normal, but it's also up quicker than normal, so that might balance it out? (: I hope you liked it. You can all guess what's coming up next chapter, right? (: I've tried to reply to the reviews, and, if not all, the majority have been answered. Thank you guys so much, again. **

**Review?**


	23. Chapter 23

**Disclaimer: (: Hi. My name is James Patterson. I enjoy making my characters look like idiots in this fanfiction. I am also illiterate. naerhgt. Thank you. **

**A/N: I just want to clarify, before I just into this thinggg, that Sara sucks. End of. (: Anyway, I apologise for the late update - I have one word for you. NaNoWriMo. 'Nuff said, I hope. [If you don't know what I'm on about, check out nanowrimo(dot)org, it's a brilliant idea, and I'm glad to be a part of it, even if it is taking over my life (:]. **

**I currently can't walk - I did my ankle in Wednesday night, at a PARAMORE CONCERT [it just deserves capitals]. It was definitely the best I've seen them [out of the 3 times I've been], and I totally recorded Hayley and Josh doing 'You Ain't Woman Enough'. I _love_ that cover, so much. Anyone else going/seen them live? (: Maybe you went on the 10th too. If you did, HOW AMAZING? :D Anyways, I hope you like this chapter!**

"MAAAAAAAAAAAX!" I was attacked by a large ball of igiocy. I think you know exactly who I'm talking about. "I MISSED YOU SO MUCH!"

I shoved him away, and slapped him around the face. "Piss off."

Ig looked at me, a little surprised. "What's up with you?"

I sighed, and shook my head. "Nothing."

Ig snorted, then looked at me with big innocent eyes, which always meant he was about to say something particularly stupid... "D'you want Pikachu to give you a hug?" ...And this was no exception.

"I swear, you are the _only_ person who could drown on a rowing machine."

Ella, coming up behind Iggy, heard this, and raised her eyebrows. "Someone's in a sarcastic mood, huh?"

"Someone put on too much make-up this morning," I bit back, then added, in a moment of genius (not that I'm big-headed, or anything), "and I'm not talking about you, El."

"Ouch," Sam laughed, high-fiving me as he joined us. "Gotta hurt."

We all looked at Iggy, waiting for his reaction, which was bound to be as ridiculously over-dramatic as usual. He didn't disappoint; he looked down at the floor, then spun around once. When he looked up again, he'd contorted his face until it was as ugly as possible (ouch, my eyes).

"Hi, Edwin," I said, rolling my eyes.

"My love," he spoke, in what he thought was a sexy voice. It just sounded like he had a bad cold. "It is Edward..."

I smiled. "Oh my God, it's you!"

"Yes," he said, using his fingers as fangs. "It is me, my love..."

"So _you're_ the gay paedophile fairy everyone's been talking about!" I said excitedly. Sam snorted, and Ella cracked up laughing. Some Twishite fan she is (and yes, that's how it's meant to be spelt. That Stephanie person obviously had a typo). "I must say, you do look the part."

Iggy, somewhat miraculously, managed to keep a straight face, even when Ella and Sam laughed. "No, my love, I'm not gay. I merely turn them gay. It's a hit and run thing; just ask your friend Emoface."

I think the fact that we all knew immediately who we were talking about was a sign that Mary was doing her job just perfectly.

"I'd say you were driving me insane, but it's pretty clear that _you're_ the insane one here."

"Who, me?" Sara asked, walking up arm-in-arm with Nudge. Oh, God. Shield your ears...

"That's not very nice calling Sart insane Max what are you even doing here anyway? We missed you today nothing interesting happened and Iggy wasn't hit enough times and Lily wasn't with us at all and where's Fang? I like Fang obviously even if he's got a really emo fringe-"

"Mary," I cut in. I'd caught the words 'emo' and 'fringe', and immediately realised who she was on about. "Fangtard's fringe is called Mary."

Sam raised his eyebrows. "Fangtard?"

I opened my mouth to reply, then saw a familiar looking guy walking out of school. He was laughing, a girl at his side. She was giggling, hands waving in the air as she explained something, all elated whirls of emotion. As I watched, they strolled out of the school, looking like a happy couple, her curls blowing into his face, him throwing a snowball at her.

Dylan, and the girl defending him the other day.

"I..." I felt like I'd had the wind knocked out of me. "Excuse me..." I vaguely heard Ella and Sara calling after me, but I was already running after Dylan.

Sprinting down the icy streets, I managed to catch up to them just as they were about to get on their bus. I spun around, so I was facing them. My face was bright red, my hair was a complete mess, and I was gasping madly for breath. In short, I looked like a wreck. Brilliant. Just how I'd always wanted to look when confronting my boyfriend and his new girlfriend.

"Max?" Dylan looked shell-shocked (what does that word even mean? It doesn't make any sense to me, you know. I'm evicting it from the Maxtionary).

There was a moment of awkwardness.

So I said what all people do in awkward silences, trying to break the ice with one of my many incredibly witty and intelligent remarks...

"So..."

Apparently, it didn't seem to have the desired effect on them, though (I'm not quite sure what the desired effect _was_ exactly, but that's beside the point. I've never known why it's _beside_ the point, either. Isn't it a bit -ist?). They exchanged a look. Then the girl smiled at him, nodded, and turned to look at him.

"Hi," she said in a distinctly frosty voice. "I'm Kat. Dylan's best friend." _Best friend?_ Since when did Dylan have FRIENDS? I also decided, as of that moment, that girls named Kat were the most likely to become prostitutes. Just sayin'.

"Yeah," I said, in a 'politely' disinterested tone, "I believe we met the other day."

Confused, Dylan looked between the two of us. "What?"

I smiled. "Oh, haven't you filled Dylan in, Kat?"

"Seeing as you're meant to be his girlfriend, Max," she replied, in an equally condescending tone, "I thought you'd do it. Oh, wait, no, you're probably too busy making out with Fang to even notice he exists."

...Okay, that might've been _strictly_ true, but considering that it was coming from a (possible) future prostitute, I didn't pay much attention. And, before haters start a-hatin' (it's in the Maxtionary, look it up), it's not just her name that makes me think that she's going to be a prostitute. There's just something about the curve of her lips... not that I'm being petty or bitchy, or anything.

"Okay, Kat," I said, in my most soothing voice. "I realise that you're feeling very angry, and betrayed-"

"By _who?_" she cut in rudely.

I shh'd her. "Now, now, let's use our indoor voices-"

"We're outside," she pointed out.

"Please, if you'd just contain your anger, I'd really-"

"I'm not angry," she said, looking at me like I was insane.

"For crying out loud, will you freaking _shut up_?" ...So maybe I lost it. Just a little.

She looked at me, smiling superiorly. Oh, man, I want to punch her _so_ bad right now. "You know what, Maximum Martinez?"

I met her eyes with a hard stare (no, I don't know it was hard, be quiet). "What?"

"When you've earned my respect, maybe then I'll be quiet." She threw me a final stony look, before jumping up onto the bus, her curls billowing out behind her.

"Go drown in a puddle," I yelled after her, more to have the last word than anything else. Women always have the last word in an argument; anything the man says after that is the start of a new one. And yes, I had just implied Kat was a man, thank you very much.

Sighing, I turned to Dylan. He'd just been stood there throughout our entire conversation, gazing at the snowy pavement intently. All the happiness I'd seen in his face when he was talking to Kat was gone. Feeling my gaze on him, he looked up and met my eyes. I knew that he knew what I was going to say.

"Look," I started, before tailing off.

He smiled sadly. "I know you didn't cheat on me with Fang, you know."

"Thanks," I said, surprised. Aww. Why does he have to be so damn nice? I need him to act like a total jerk! "I'm pretty sure you didn't cheat on me with Kat." Yeah, he's too spineless. Besides, if I honestly thought he had, I'd have ripped his spine out and beat him with it long before then.

"Yeah," he said, shuffling his feet in the snow.

Oh, man, it was awkward again. Okay: idea. I'd just tell a totally intellectual and hilarious joke to break the ice. You know the kind...

"What did Paris Hilton's left leg say to her right leg?" Maybe not the best start, but I was pretty damn sure I could redeem myself. Dylan just stared at me like I was mad, which I most likely was. "Nothing, they're never together!"

Dylan forced out a slight chuckle. Fang would've laughed. Fang would've told me an even more perverted joke, and I would've beaten him up for saying it, and we would've ended up, somehow, in an argument about who was claiming Nora and Patch for our armies. And laughing. Definitely laughing.

Oh my God, why was I thinking about Fangtard when Dylan was staring at me like he was waiting for me to say something remotely intelligent? Didn't he know by then that that was practically impossible? My brain was in Hawaii, for God's sake, and I didn't even have Mary there to back me up (for someone who looks so emo, she really does have some brilliant comebacks, such as, 'I know you are, but what am I?')! What did he expect? The freaking works of Dickens to spout from my mouth?

"To be, or not to be?" Shakespeare's cool, right? Not quite Dickens, but at least it was six words in a seemingly sensible order. God, I was acting like such an Igiot. Someone, save me, please.

"Max," Dylan said, his voice warm, "I'm not going to be mad, or anything. Just... say what you need to say."

Oh for God's sake, why was he being so damn _nice_? Couldn't he just, I don't know, chuck a snowball at me, and tell me I was a bitch? That'd have made things _so_ much easier. I got the feeling that that suggestion wouldn't go down so well with Dyl, though, so I just sighed. God, I was so crap at all that relationship crap.

I bit my lip, and ran my hands through my hand, finding little flecks of snow there. "Dylan... it's been, uh... _cool_, going out with you..." Hey, I think that made sense! Okay... "And I really don't regret it, at all." Well, I did, but that didn't matter. "I just think we'd be better off as friends."

He nodded slowly, not looking surprised in the slightest. "I understand."

Seriously, that was all he said. It wasn't even in an accusatory tone, or anything, just... nice. ARGH, he had to have made it all so difficult... why couldn't he have pretended to be Fangtard? He was bloody difficult constantly.

Oh my God, Fang, get out of my damn head! Grr.

"We can still be friends, right?" I said, trying to sound nice (a near impossible feat). "I don't want this to affect the band, or anything."

He nodded again. "Sure, Max."

I smiled stiffly, and sort of gave a weird wave of acknowledgement with my hands. What was going on with me, really? Just as I turned away, all ready to let out a sigh of relief, Dylan called my name again. I twisted my neck so I could look at him; he was stood leaning out of the bus.

"Thanks," he said quietly. Then the bus doors shut, and he sped away, waving.

You know what? I didn't feel all that bad about it all. Even though he'd been _way_ too nice, Dylan'd taken it really well, and... we really had been better off as friends: at least that way we'd spoken, laughed, been able to have a good time together. I'd seen less of him when we were going out than when we were friends... and I hadn't cheated on him with Fangenstein.

He'd kissed _me_, right? So that wasn't cheating on my part... It wasn't like I was attracted to him, or anything. He was just my best friend.

At least, that's what I told myself, as I walked to Nudge's.

**[ X X X ]**

"Don't open your mouth," I warned Nudge as she opened the door. I was afraid that if she started talking she'd never stop, and I really wanted to talk to El. "Just get Ella, please."

She threw me a quick scowl, before running back in, yelling, "ELLA! THERE'S A PSYCHO ON MY DOOR STEP!" Nice to know I'm loved, eh?

There was the sound of a head of elephants charging down a flight of stairs, then Ella appeared. Oops. I meant, I heard Ella making her way down the stair, before she opened the door again. There. She can't kill me now.

"Max? Should've known," she rolled her eyes. "You want to come in?"

"No, uh..." I sounded awkward, and upset. Which I guess I kinda was. "Can we talk, for a while?"

El took a good long look at me, taking in my red eyes and snuffly nose. Then she smiled, and I instantly felt a little bit reassured. At least I'd always have my sister.

"I'll just grab my coat," she said, ducking back into the house.

Five minutes later, we were walking around the streets in silence. El just kept pace with me, knowing that I'd talk when I was ready. Sometimes, I really loved my sister. Not too often, just enough to know when to appreciate her. For a Twilight-obsessed, make-up slathering, Pikachu-Facebook-friending, last-cookie-eating, way-too-early-job-getting, war-inducer and all round igiot, she was a pretty decent sister.

Finally, I stopped, and turned to look at her. "I broke up with Dylan." She just waited for the elaboration to come... "And Batfang kissed me."

"You know," she said slowly, "it amazes me that even when you're upset, you still call him that."

I smiled. "It's his name." Then my smile started to tremble, and before I knew what was going on, I was in tears. Yeah, me, Maximum Ride. And you know what? Get over it. I might've had a reputation for being the tough girl, the one who never cries, but sometimes, I just can't help it. And if you judge me on that, then you aren't worth my time anyway.

Ella wrapped her arms around me, and I sobbed into her favourite black coat. I thought it was a real symbol of how upset I must've looked that she didn't even complain, just held me tight, and picked the snow out of my hair.

"You done crying?" she asked softly, after five million hiccups.

I looked up at her, my eyes swollen and sore. "I-I'm not c-crying. I'm j-just le-leaking s-stress."

Ella laughed, and let go off me. "If it's any consolation, I think you've done the right thing."

"You do?" I blinked away the tears that threatened to surface at that statement furiously. What was going on with my emotions today, honestly?

"Yeah," she said gently. "You and Dylan were way too... it just would never have worked. You need someone who kind of doesn't care about your feelings, in a caring way, if you get what I mean?"

I laughed, a little shakily. "Does anyone ever know what you mean?"

She grinned, and did a salute I swore she must've picked up from me. "Probably not."

"I'm sorry for shouting at you at lunch."

"It's okay."

"What do I do now?" I tried not to sound pathetic, and failed.

She looked at me, and smiled. "Go back to Fang, and do your thing."

"But..." I sighed. "I don't know what to say to him."

"Max, it's your life," Ella said seriously. "Whatever you choose to do with Fang, it'll be okay. We're all going to support you, no matter what. Maybe you'll end up going out with him. Maybe you won't." She shrugged. "That's just life. In the grand scheme of things, does it really matter?"

I gazed at her through the film of tears coating my eyes. "You've really grown up, you know?" And it was true. This girl standing in front of me, with her hair in mad tangles around her, her favourite coat soaked, with a ladder running up one side of her tights, wasn't my little sister any more. This wasn't the girl who used to scream at the television whenever Robert Pattinson was mentioned, the girl who used to beg to go to Justin Bieber concerts, the girl who used to buy the gaudiest make-up available... she was a whole new person, and I liked the new her. It felt like she'd changed overnight, but I knew if I'd have looked closely enough, I'd have seen it happening slowly, over the course of the last couple of months or so.

She smiled, a little sadly. "Yeah. I know."

Sometimes, all you need is your little sister to show you that not everything's wrong with the world.

**A/N: (: I hope you liked it. I know it's not my usual 'make-a-joke-out-everything' style, but I wanted to show Max's real relationship with Ella, behind all the fighting, and everything. **

**Couple of quick notes: **

**1 - I got Twitter! Ahaha, I know. Follow me paramoll, if you're in le mood. **

**2 - I've posted a competition of sorts on my profile, if you'd like to check that out. If you want your own character in Metamorphic, you might want to check it out [I realise how pretentious this all sounds. I have a bet with Sara - she thinks no one'll do it, I bet her someone will. Prove me right, guys! Help me win this one!]. (: Full details on my page, of course. **

**3 - This is posted for Project PULL, run by Bookaholic711. (: **

**That's all, folks! (: **

**Revieweth? **


	24. Chapter 24

**Disclaimer: I'm not James Patterson. Short and sweet.**

**A/N: (: So I had a few entries to my 'contest', and I'd like to thank everyone who bothered with it, they were all amazing to read. Obviously, there can only be one winner, and that's the lovely b4k4-r3dux - just waiting for your PM back, girl. Definitely go read her entry [it's freaking hilarious - no joke], along with the ones written by Bigtimebooks and i heart manga 89 - I'm so sorry you couldn't all win. Also, CrazyMax13? You're stronger than those horrible flamers - no one deserves that sort of abuse, online or offline. I wrote an massive rant, which you can view on my profile, sparked by the horrible, almost inhuman flames given to an entry, all from the same project [which will remain nameless]. Anyway, go give those guys some love/congratulations! (: **

**Slight mistake in the last chapter - Valencia is in ENGLAND, not America... I completely forgot that they're obviously American... apologies, I'm an igiot. (:**

**All the reviews are, as always, very much appreciated; hitting 500 was absolutely lovely, thank you to anyone who bothers to even read this crap. **

**One last thing? Happy birthday, Sara/Sart/Robby/Berta [sorry it's late] - thanks for being you, retard, this story wouldn't even be here without your stupid comments. I love you really (:**

I walked back to Fang's in the snow, trying to quit crying. And newsflash: snow is pretty damn cold. I'm not talking about kind of chilly, but ABSOLUTELY FREAKING FREEZING.

So when Fang opened the door, I was stood on the step shivering like crazy in my thin My Chemical Romance t-shirt, teeth chattering, eyes sore and blood-shot, face streaked with tears, and hair that belonged on a horse's behind (not that I've ever looked back there, or anything. Don't get the wrong idea. But I'm pretty sure that that's the look every girl strives for, and every boy's looking for. Mmmhmm.

Fang just looked at me. For once, I couldn't read his eyes (they didn't have the normal subtitles). Oh, man, he's opening his mouth. I bet he's gonna yell at me, and then I'm going to yell back, because, for me, yelling is like a conditional reflex.

He didn't, though. Just muttered, "Come here," and opened his arms. Being me, I didn't move, so he had to step forward and yank me through the door. Then he wrapped his arms around me, and pulled me flush against him.

It was... nice. He smelt all Fang-y, and he was warm, and his cotton t-shirt was soft, and... no, I didn't wipe my runny nose on him! Wait, does it count if I wiped it off after? Uhh... never mind.

"You're an idiot," he murmured into my hair. I smiled against his chest, not wanting to shove him away just yet.

Which I soon realised was a mistake, as Iggy walked into the hall, on the phone to someone. "Dude! No way!"

He seemed really antagonised, not even noticing me and Fangenstein (giving me the time to leap away from him, thank God). Did I even _want_ to know what was going on?

"Team Edward _all the way_."

Of course.

Fang and I locked eyes, and I could tell that he was trying not to laugh. It _was_ pretty ironic. I mean, there's me, _me_, all teary-eyed and upset, not to mention the fact that we were quite possibly having a moment (a purely platonic and friend-like moment, of course), and then in came Iggy, arguing about _Twishite._ It was just so bloody typical.

"Dude!" he yelled into the phone. "You can't... no! Just no! Pikachu's gonna shock you into next week if you... NO! NU-UH!"

My forehead hit my hand with immense force. Best friends, huh?

"Ig," Fang said, his voice strained from trying to keep the laughter in, "inside voice."

Surprised, Iggy looked up. "Oh, hey, Emo McEmo pants."

"That," I said, rolling my eyes, "is the _least_ original nickname I've ever heard."

Iggy turned towards us fully, grinning, and I noticed for the first time the camera (Cassie) in his hand. Was the damn thing _glued_ to his freaking hand? Seriously!

"What team are you guys, then?"

We responded simultaneously. "Team guy-who-almost-hit-Bella-with-a-truck." I turned instantly to Fangtard, and punched him in the shoulder.

"What?" he replied, not even flinching. I take back all that stuff about wanting Dylan to act like Batfang; I didn't think I could deal with all the irritation without exploding (and, seeing as I was going to rule it, I didn't think that was a particularly good thing for the world. Not that I was big-headed, or anything).

"Quit copying me," I glared at him. "And don't you dare hug me again." I wasn't lying... about the first thing, at least. Hey, I had a reputation to keep up there, and acting like some cuddly toy just was not gonna cut it no more (yes, I was aware that I butchered the English language somewhat daily. I just didn't care. Go away).

Fangenstein looked at me, and half-smiled. Didn't glare, or look surprised, or hurt... just smiled. Boys; so stupid they couldn't even understand insults.

Iggy hadn't dignified us with a response, just glared us while we spoke, filming us with poor Cass too (I really do feel for that camera). His phone must have buzzed with someone talking through the speakers when Fangtard and I turned to him, since he jumped about a mile (not really. More like a few centimetres, but that didn't sound half as dramatic).

"Hey, yeah? Sorry about that, I'm still here." He threw us a final stony glance, then skipped off into the kitchen. Seriously skipped. Oh dear God. Sometimes, I really do worry about him. Then I'd remember that he was dating a Pokemon, and get onto more important things in my life. Like eating. And sleeping. And, you know, ruling the world.

I turned to Batfang, and let the cursed word out: "So..."

"Really?" he rolled his eyes at me.

My eyes automatically narrowed to a glare. "What? I can't help it if you're too boring to come up with a proper conversation."

He brushed Mary out of his eyes, and I reached forward and smacked his hand. Confused, he sent me a pure WTF look.

"Quit harassing Mary!"

"What the-" he shoved me away, grinning despite himself. Holy shit, Fang grinned. That _so_ belonged on Wikipedia. I laughed, but it came out a little hoarse from the earlier tears, and Fangtard's smile vanished. "What's up?"

"Eh?" I brushed it off, throwing my hair back from my face (see, unlike some people, I wasn't quite stupid enough to _name_ my fringe... heh...). "What _are_ you on about? I'm all good."

He eyed me cautiously, clearly not believing me. Oh, bloody hell. Why did my best friend have to, you know, know me? It'd be so much easier if we didn't know any of our friends. I _knew_ he wanted to ask me why I'd run away earlier, after he kissed me (the order of words is extremely important, there. I suggest you all take notes), but I also knew he wouldn't, because he cared about me too much.

"About earlier..." Look at me, being all adult-ish, and bringing it up so he didn't have to. "Could we, uh, just forget it ever happened?"

His gaze dropped to the floor for a split-second, and when his dark eyes met mine again he was smiling to himself. It wasn't a happy smile - it was coloured with sarcasm, and clouded with irony (I'm poetic like that sometimes).

"Later," he said quietly. "Iggy'll have blown up the kitchen by now."

I opened my mouth to reply, but he had a fair point, so I led the way to the kitchen (of course I led. What else did you expect me to do? _Follow_? Psh, don't make me laugh).

In there, Jane was stood at the table, peeling carrots mundanely. Angel sat next to the pile of peelings, swinging her legs, and relating her school day. Ig was propped up against the wall, hanging up.

"Who was that?" I asked him as we walked in. Angel immediately jumped down, and opened her arms for a hug; she never does that with Ig, since no one ever knew where his hands have been (or wanted to know). "Hi, sweetie."

Ig grinned at me, and said, in response to my earlier question, "A friend."

"Since when did you have friends?" Angel asked innocently from my arms. Ah, seven year olds, and their impeccable timing.

"He's the new kid," Ig explained. "Aiden."

"Oh," Angel nodded, like it was all clear to her now. "He doesn't really know you yet, then."

"Pikachu's offended on my behalf," Ig sniffed. Jane laughed, throwing carrot peel at him.

Angel looked confused for a moment, before whispering in my ear, "Max, what's a Pikachu?"

"Iggy's rat girlfriend," I whispered back, half-grinning.

Angel looked extremely perplexed. "Is she blind?"

I nodded. "Deaf, too."

"Poor thing," she shook her head, and I couldn't help but giggle. I loved that kid.

I set her down on the floor, and she ran off to grab Fangenstein. Ig picked up a carrot, and stared at it. Not like normal people staring, like psycho staring. I didn't even want to know what the hell he was planning now. Carrot bombs? A new girlfriend? Please, no.

He turned to me, very, very slowly. His face was completely serious. Stupid statement in three, two, one...

"I shall name him Jeremy, and he shall be my best friend in the entire universe."

Don't say I didn't warn you.

"What about Aiden?" Fang asked, rolling his eyes comically at Angel, who was giggling happily by his side.

"Psh," I laughed, "he can count himself lucky."

"Who's lucky?" asked the Gasman, walking in through the back doors (which lead to the background), grabbing Jeremy from Ig's hand, and chucking it to Jane.

She started to peel it, sighing at Gazzy. "Zeph, how many times have I told you to wipe your feet?"

Never mind that he'd just thrown a carrot at her, it was all about the fancy carpets in the living room. Gaz sighed, throwing Fang and I an exasperated look before dramatically stomping back to the doormat.

Meanwhile, Iggy stood there, watching Jane with wide, terrified eyes as she peeled Jeremy, chopped him into three small parts, and threw him into the pot with the rest of his little carroty family. Then, like in slow-motion, he stepped forward, until he was right next to Jane, and looked down into the pot.

"I didn't know you for long, Jeremiah C. Top, but you will be sorely missed by all," he said, in a deep solemn voice. "Rest in peace, Jeremy."

"Or in boiling water," Fang corrected, as Jane, rolling her eyes, poured the contents of the steaming kettle into the pot, and moved it to the stove.

Angel looked up at Ig with innocent blue eyes. "What does the C stand for?"

Ig smiled superiorly, as if he'd been waiting all his life for that moment (he probably had). "Carrot, of course."

"...So his name was Jeremiah Carrot Top," I said, just to confirm his pure igiocy.

He pointed at me with his index finger. "We have a winner! As for your prize..." Before I could make sense of what was happening (and slap him silly), he grabbed my hand, and sprinted off, dragging me with him.

Was there any point in fighting with him? He would've just threatened me with Pikachu. Or possibly Lady GaGa. Then again... what was worse - being attacked by a retarded mouse-rat thing that had accidentally jumped into the yellow dye, or entering Ig's room?

Too late: he'd already shoved me past the Pokemon poster, and shut the door. Damn. Brain, where the hell were you?

Oh, eww... Cheryl Cole. Never mind the discarded clothes: he'd acquired several new posters that'd just about burned my eyes. Honestly, who the hell needs to see Justine Beaver shirtless in their lifetime? Exactly.

"Did you know that, statistically, six out of seven dwarves aren't happy?" Ig said, very-matter-of-factly, as he shoved his various science textbooks to the floor, and flopped down onto his bed. He lay there for a few seconds, before propping himself up, and staring at me like he expected me to agree or something.

Instead, I put my hands on my hips, and raised my eyebrows. "You've got five seconds to explain yourself before I break your nose."

He grinned. "Love you too, Maxy."

"Five... four... three..." I started tapping my foot impatiently.

"What'd you say to Dylan earlier?"

I thought I was in complete and utter shock.

No joke.

That was the first non-stupid thing I'd ever heard James Griffiths say.

If there hadn't been a massive Miley Cyrus poster behind him, I might've even been able to take him seriously.

I sighed. "That I just wanted to be friends."

He nodded. "How'd he take it?"

I shrugged, fiddling with a loose thread on my MCR t-shirt (I didn't do well with talking about emotional stuff, okay? It's just who I was). "Okay, I think."

He nodded again, lying back down and gazing up at the ceiling, where he'd taped a poster of Edward Cullen (the sarcastic comment just wrote itself here). Since it didn't look like he was going to reply any time soon, I took the opportunity to really look around his bin (some may call it a room... not me).

My findings?

Four Edward Cullen/Twilight posters.

Two Cheryl Cole/Girls Aloud posters.

One Ke$ha poster.

One Lady GaGa poster.

A billion and twenty two Pikachu posters/figurines/plush toys/unrecognisable yellow things with ears.

And...

"Hey, what's that?" I threw Iggy a questioning look, before moving to his desk, and shutting his laptop lid.

"Ugh, gnome, I was uploading something. Honestly, you and your short little ways," Ig sighed dramatically, back to his prima donna ways. Brilliant. "It's just a noticeboard, anyways! Pikachu insists. Says it makes her feel more human."

I rolled my eyes, more focused on the cork-board in front of me. There were several properly printed photographs; one of me with fists clenched (probably threatening him over something); one of Ella, Nudge, Sam and Dylan laughing; one of Fang, Angel and Gazzy, and one of us all together. There was another one, larger than all of the others, of Lily, smiling.

Awww. Ig actually has a hea-

Oh, wait, hang on. I didn't quite see the Pikachu shrine: a screen-shot of the first time he caught her, a Pokethething card, and several badges pinned onto magazine articles.

Ig pushed me away, gently, saying, "Guess I can take this one down now." Something about the way he spoke made me take a step back, rather than kicking his sorry arse for even touching me. I watched, silent, as he pulled the picture of Lily off, and pulled off the blu-tac holding it up. He made as if he was going to throw it in the bin, but recoiled at the last moment, and shoved it inside in one of his drawers.

"She dumped you?" I asked, trying to sound sympathetic.

"No, um," he stalled, sitting down in his swivel chair (covered in a yellow Pikachu blanket. Honestly, where the _hell_ did he get these things? Fang's closet?), and rebooting up his laptop. "She, uh," he tapped a few keys, "just, erm," pressed a few buttons, "well, you see," peered at the screen, "you know, it, uh..."

Okay, no more stalling.

I slapped him on the back of the head. Hard. "Tell me, or I'll knock your freaking head right off."

"Max, honestly," he sighed dramatically. Oh, for crying out loud. "Violence is not the answer. Fight with doves-"

"Okay, number one," I held up a finger. "Quit quoting Christofer Drew. You're never going to be anywhere near as purely amazing as him, and you know it. Two," I held up another finger, ignoring any melodramatic facial expressions, "I've changed my mind."

Close your mouths, it wasn't that shocking. Honestly.

Ig raised both eyebrows. "You... you have?" His voice was pathetically hopeful. Hahahahahahaha, that was fun.

"I have," I confirmed, smiling. "Not only am I going to rip your head off, I'm going to disable you, make sure you never have children, tear your hands apart, and completely deafen you."

The smile disappeared instantly. "But... Bella, my lo-"

"And none of that Twishite crap."

"Pikachu likes it."

"Pikachu likes _you._"

"And...?"

"I think that's pretty much self-explanatory."

"Ah, but you see, my love, that is exactly the problem," he said, swivelling to face me after fiddling with Cass for a few moments. "Pikachu likes me a little too much for Lily's liking."

_Really_, Ig? Did he honestly think I was THAT stupid? I was offended.

"It was a mutual decision," he finished, shrugging, and folding his arms easily.

"So you mutually decided for her to dump you, and break your heart?" Someone asked from the doorway, in a sceptical tone.

"Hey, Batty, Mary," I nodded to him, not surprised in the least. "Wondered when you two were going to join us."

Fangtard rolled his eyes, but his lips had a little spasm attack, and I think he may have been close to smiling. Ha. I'm taking that as a victory. Not sure of what, I just am.

"Pikachu says hi Fang," Ig said gravely.

I shook my head, rolling my eyes. "What about Mary?"

"Who's Mary?" Ig asked, confused. "Fang's imaginary girlfriend?"

I almost smiled, but that would've been a betrayal to good ol' Mary. "Her fringe, of course."

"Her?" Fangenstein inquired, eyebrow raised (Mary was hiding one).

I looked at him like he was a little queer (he wasn't, of course. He was _extremely _queer. Cue winking). "Of course, Fanglette. What, you thought I was going to call you a boy?" I shook my head. "What made you think I would be so _rude? _Honestly."

Fanglette glared at me, before turning to Ig. "This is her idea of a joke."

"Correction," I interjected. "This _is_ a joke."

"Your face is a joke," Fangtard threw back.

"Your life's a joke."

"So's your Mum."

"So's your face."

"No fair," Batfang protested, "I already used that one."

"Don't know what you're talking about," I smiled innocently.

"No way," he said stubbornly. "Already said it."

I shook my head, grinning. "Nope."

"I..." he gave up, sighing. "This is useless."

"You're useless."

"So's your face."

"So's your life."

"So's your Mum."

"So's your face."

"Are you freaking joking me?" he glared at me, and I threw my hands up in the air (no, I didn't also wave them like I just didn't care. Honestly, you're so immature).

"No, I'm regular joking." Ha! 2-0 to me. Never gets old, that one.

"Max," Ig interrupted my little mental party (...I have a life. Swear. On Ig's life... wait, he doesn't have one... how does this work again?). "What was the math homework, again?"

I just looked at him, silently fuming already.

Fanglette grinned. "Owned."

**A/N: I apologise for the late update, I'm trying real hard to get this next chapter written - I'm already writing, which is a good thing. (: Meant to say last chapter, all credit for the Fangtard nickname goes to the lovely CallMeBitter, I'm sorry for not giving you credit sooner! (: **

**Sorry for not replying to reviews this time around; I really, really appreciate each and every one of them, but I just want to go to sleep. (': Sorry guys!**

**Posted for Project PULL, run by Bookaholic711. **

**Something a little different? I'm going to ask you all a question every chapter from now on. Sometimes just for fun, sometimes for the story. (: Post your answer in your review, if you bother to write one!**

**So... what are some of your favourite lyrics?**

**Review?**


	25. Chapter 25

**Disclaimer: Property of James Patterson.**

**A/N: Thank you for all your kind reviews, you should know by now just how appreciated they are. Was lovely reading some of your favourite lyrics. No excuses, just my apologies, and, finally, chapter 24. **

**Song: **

**You're the One - Shayne Orok. [This guy has some crazy talent. YouTube him - you won't regret it.]**

"Nick? James?" Jane stepped into the living room. Ooh, real names - someone'd been yelling for a while. All three of us were engaged in a fierce battle - Call of Duty: Modern Warfare. I was _totally _kicking their butts, too. Girl power (the fourth controller Ig set up in the corner of the room for Pikachu doesn't count).

"Uh?" Ig replied eloquently, before standing up and pointing at me angrily. "I SO JUST SHOT YOU!"

I stuck my tongue out. "I'm too awesome for bullets."

"And real modest," Fangenstein tacked on,half smiling. He sighed, paused the game, and jumped to his feet just as Jane reached boiling point. "What's up, Mum?"

Jane pursed her lips, before evidently deciding to let the subject go. "Go say goodnight to Angel and Zeph. They're already in bed, so I don't want you disturbing them." Read as: Max stay the hell out of there as you're likely to land them in jail somehow. Love you too, Jane.

How, though, could you go into someone's room, with the intent of wishing them a good night, and _not _disturb them? Isn't that kind of the point? ...Whatever.

Ig sent me an apologetic look as Batty grabbed him by the arm, and yanked him out of the room. I jut rolled my eyes - like I wasn't totally used to Jane ignoring me as much as she could.

I played for a few moments longer, but it just wasn't the same without Ig screaming obscenities every five seconds, and Fangenstein, being a useless Fable addict, claiming that the only reason he died was because he didn't know the controls. The real reason? He just plain sucked. No surprise there.

In the end, I paused it, and glanced around the room. Nothing interesting, really. A pair of scissors on the side that could be useful for murder when Batfang fell asleep. A plate of cookies on the table, abandoned by Ange and Gaz earlier, that could be useful for devouring when we watched Scott Pilgrim World. And Iggy's laptop, closed on the sofa, that could be useful for hacking... well, right then, actually.

Password? Let's think... put myself in the mind of an igiot...

JAMESGRIFFITHSSPASSWORD.

Oh, look, I was in. Funny that. What a tit.

Immediately, about twenty windows popped up. Bloody hell, what did he do on that thing? The first thing I saw was Skype. Some conversation with a guy called Shane Dawson, discussing... a sketch thing, for YouTube, based on a guy who got drunk on a beach, met a fish, and now has a mermaid for a daughter - obviously focusing on the drunk on beach, meets fish part. _Obviously_. Dude... who thought of crap like that? Ew... looked like that Shane guy had an equally sick mind.

I x'd it, and moved onto the many internet explorer tabs. A few of them were just YouTube videos he'd gotten halfway through, before pausing and never going back. Who in fresh hell was Mitchell Davis? Ig's boyfriend? I mean, I'd always suspected but...

Then, finally, I found Iggy's channel. Holy shit... 1,956, 413 subscribers? 114,689,000 total views? Oh bloody hell, what's he been doing now? I clicked on the latest video, which was apparently uploaded two hours ago - so that was what he was doing... ah.

**'I'M AN OPTIMIST?' **was the title of the video.

It was basically five minutes of Ig sat there, talking about how his relationship with Lily ended, and... ew, feelings. Inner feelings. Important feelings. Again: ew, feelings. Still... wow. Ig and serious - two words I'd never thought I'd use in the same sentence.

To sum up the whole video (as he did, with the use of editing), Lily left him because she thought he was just too happy. Like, _all the time._ And, sure, I guess that's kind of what we'd all thought of Ig - that he was just one-dimensional. The funny guy, you know? I mean, he was annoying, stupid, igtarded, and a general igiot... but without him, school would've been depressing. Who would we have ripped on, after all?

Having - most unfortunately - endured, what, eleven horrible years with him? Yeah, eleven years of torture, I could say that he did, actually, have a serious side. Well, I could _then_, anyways. Before I saw his YouTube vids? Not so much (I'm joking - that happens, you know... sometimes).

I scrolled the rest of his videos - some of them were just us, messing about, some of them were of him and Lily, some of them were even of us all performing. Us being Metamorphic, obviously. A decent amount of them were random little scripted skits, most of them featuring Fangenstein, one or two with special guests.

God.

Who knew Iggy could even speak five words without every second one relating to Pikachu, Edward Cullen, the Mafia, or something completely disgusting and unrepeatable? Not me.

Whilst I was in the process of reading through some of the comments posted by dedicated igiots (that was what I named Ig's little following. Creative, no?), some of them worryingly stalkerish (apparently some lesbian called NotDumbDimBlonde wanted to marry me... scary), I heard the start of a little piano riff drifting out of Angel and Gazzy's room. N'aw, Batfang was playing them to sleep! Well, what kind of a friend would I be if I didn't go eavesdrop? A terrible one, that's what. I peered inside the open doorway to see the kids sat up (with Ig perched on Ange's bed), watching Fangenstein scale the piano easily.

_The rain is falllin'  
Like it was on that day  
Remindin' me of how we went our separate ways girl_

...Um, what? Fang doesn't _sing_. What in fresh hell's going on here?

_You know I think of you  
And wonder what you'd say  
If I asked if you were thinkin' the same_

This must be some kind of illusion. I mean, like Batty could have such a... bloody _hell._

Girl it's been a long time and I think we can get this right  
I hope you realize someday  
Someday that you are

That one for me  
Yeah you are you've always been mine  
From the very start  
I hope and I pray  
That you will stay for the rest of my days & nights  
I hope you will, I hope  
I hope you will

His voice was kind of harsh and soft all at the same time, singing with just the right amount of effort, but it was easy to hear that he was holding back. It... was alright. Decent. Good enough. It'd do. __

The sun is shinin'  
Yeah right down on my face  
Remindin' me of all the fun we had and games we played  
You know I think of you  
And wonder what you'd say  
If I asked if you were thinkin' the same

Girl it's been a long time and I think we can get this right  
I hope you realize someday  
Someday that you are

...Song choice was somewhat interesting too - I'd thought he was gay. Considering the context of the song, I obviously should've factored in Fanglette's lesbian interests a while back.__

That one for me  
Yeah you are you've always been mine  
From the very start  
I hope and I pray  
That you will stay for the rest of my days & nights  
I hope you will, I hope  
I hope you will

He finished with a simple flourish, breaking down the last chords. Angel clapped delightedly, a massive smile splitting her face.

"Who were you singing about?" she asked, smile turning coy. Seven year-old psychopath right there, folks. Scarily inceptive.

Fang rolled his eyes. "Night, Ange." Despite her protests, he swept her into a quick hug, planted a kiss on her head, grabbed Ig by the hair and pulled him from the room... right where I was standing.

I folded my arms, raising my eyebrows. "Someone's been keeping secrets."

"Don't know what you're talking about," Batty said nonchalantly, not meeting my narrowed gaze.

"Leave it out," I rolled my eyes. "We could've... God, I don't know! Hmph." I turned away from him, eyes fixed resolutely on the wall. Stupid best friend.

"Yeah, Fang!" Iggy tried to join my side (who can blame him, really?), but I turned on him.

"Don't you bloody start, you... serious YouTube person, you!" No need to compliment me on that particularly cutting insult I'd used there - yes, thank you, I had been working on that one for a while. "What else have you been hiding from me then, huh?" Not quite sure where I was going with that one.

"Well," Ig tried, "Fang's secretly a woman." Fangtard turned to Ig, a sarcastic 'thanks for having my back, bro' scrawled all over his - totally unattractive in any shape, form or dimension (3D vision, little ones. Now available from any bullshit eyesight-enhancement suppliers) - face.

"Common knowledge," I brushed it off, before snapping my fingers. "I've got it. You're secretly married to each other, after being divorced several times..."

"I was desperate for love!" Ig threw himself at my feet, pretending to weep uncontrollably. Oh bloody hell, I'd created a monster. "I mean, look at her! She's not even pretty!"

I wasn't quite done with my fun yet, though (there was just nothing more ultimately satisfying than driving my two best friends - read as: worst enemies - completely insane. Well, more insane than they already were). "And you have an illegitimate child named Justin."

Just like that, Ig picked himself up from the floor, and flicked non-existent dust off of his shoulders. Drama queen. And yes, I can talk (not literally... wait, do I mean literally? Oh, sod off, the lot of you. Hawaii is a very popular tourist destination for brains these days, you know).

"Do not bring Justine into this," he said gravely.

"I thought it was a boy?" I interjected.

"_She_," he replied, glaring, "is-"

"Non-existent," Fangenstein finished for him, having been facepalming throughout our entire conversation. "Let's go play."

I laughed, already leading the way. "Technically, Fanglette, you don't really _play._ You mash buttons and hope you get lucky."

"I..." he realised that he really did have absolutely no excuse for his shitty Black Ops skills, and promptly shut the hell up. "I claim Albion." Ha, I wish.

"Have your Albion," I scoffed. "I have the Mushroom Kingdom."

He just looked at me. "A fat plumber with fashion issues?" Ooh, get Fanglette - fashion issues, ey? Looked like he was finally embracing his female side... which, considering that was at least 99.9 percent of him, was about time.

In response, I threw - like, literally chucked - his controller at him: it landed, with a satisfying thud, square in his stomach.

"I do hope you haven't harmed our newly-conceived daughter," Ig said mildly as he sank down beside me. "We're naming her after you."

Thankfully, I'd spent years coaching myself to just not ask, so I simply rolled my eyes. "I hope it dies."

Ig gasped, hand rising to his heart. "What a way to speak of little Psycho!" He paused, before saying proudly, "She has two middle names, you know."

"I hope they're Super and Amazing." How could they not have been? She was named after me, after all.

"Oh, they are," Ig reassured me, completely missing the point. Well, what had I expected? He was Ig, after all. "You ready for this?" _No._ Go away. "Pyscho Crazy Bitch Ride! I think it has a certain ring to it, don't you?"

...Love you too, Ig. "Butt-trumpet."

"Now now, I like to think I've advanced from trumpet level."

Oh yeah, his arse level had totally risen (not in _that_ way, perverts). Facepalm. "Oh, I do apologise, butt-trombone."

Before he could respond with something typically igiotic, I un-paused the game, and nailed a clean head-shot on him.

Ha.

I took another sip of my diet Coke, strumming another few chords on Amy. "What time's it?"

Fanglette checked his watch. "Coming up for four am."

"You tired?"

"Nah."

"Me neither."

I smiled to myself; my smile broadened when I saw he was doing the same thing. Our eyes caught for a second, before we both glanced away quickly, embarrassed. I mean, _he_ looked away, embarrassed - me, embarrassed? 'Course not. God, guys! So distrustful.

Ig had crashed out on the living room sofa a couple of hours ago, during the YouTube marathon Batfang and I decided to lead - i.e. putting Justin Bieber videos on and dancing in front of them - and by dancing, I meant... never mind. When he'd finally fallen asleep, we'd taken the opportunity to scribble all over him: in Sharpie. God knew how the hell he was going to get it off, but eh. Evil people don't think about skin poisoning when being evil. Because, you know, we were evil. The evil people I was referring to there were me and Fanglette... you see? Good.

Some of the most interesting?

EDWARD CULLEN IS MY BITCH (L) on his forehead was a highlight.

The Pikachu cheeks we'd coloured on looked pretty damn... stupid.

HI I'M GAY coming from a speech bubble? Genius.

Bracelets adorned his wrists, and various Twilight and Ke$ha lyrics trailed up his arms. What teenage guy _didn't_ want 'And so the lamb-lion thing fell in love with P. Diddy who brushed his teeth with bottles of Jack' written all over his forearm? ...Okay, so maybe we didn't know the lyrics - quite frankly, I think it'd have been much more worrying if we _had._

Most of the others were... unrepeatable. But undoubtedly hilarious. Shame I was going to have to murder Batty brutally at some point in my life - we made a pretty good team.

We'd video'd it as we did it on Cass, then hacked his YouTube (who left themselves signed in when their two supermegafoxyawesomehot but kind of evil best friends were in their house? Only the igiot of all igiots), and posted it, along with a few pictures on his equally popular DailyBooth.

No need for applause. We knew we were brilliant. Very much aware of our blinding awesomesauceyness (guys. Please, stop trying to call me out on my spelling/imagining that annoying red line underneath it and shaking your head shamefully; we can be okay again. Friends, even. See... the Maxtionary is now for sale at any decent bookshop. You can even get in a bundle with the 3D vision! Featuring words such as awesomesauceyness, Batfang, and Sart - get it now, for only $50!). We didn't even need to try any more - it just happened. That's what came from being amazing, kids.

Anyway, since then, we'd just crashed on the bed in his room, strumming out random riffs and tunes on our guitars, sometimes talking, sometimes not. He was lying back against propped pillows, ridiculously long legs covering the whole bed. When we first came in he just jumped on there - honestly, Batfangs' those days. Just no appreciation for the under-tall. Naturally, I just pushed myself right back against the wall, overlaying his legs with mine.

It was... nice. Comfortable. Warm. Fun. Light. Happy. ...Nice.

Suddenly, I pushed Amy away, leaning her against the opposite wall before sitting back down. Fanglette raised an inquisitive eyebrow, not even needing to look at the fretboard as he quietly strummed the main riff to Na Na Na by My Chemical Romance.

"You know, you seem to have a recurring problem," I said conversationally, pulling his sleek black guitar from his hands and placing it carefully next to Amy. She stood proud next to him, not giving one that he was approximately - oh, I didn't know - a million dollars more expensive than her. That's my girl.

"And that would be?" Fangtard half-smiled. Damn, that should've been illegal.

"Boredness."

"That's not a word." Looked like someone needed the Maxtionary...

"Your face isn't a word."

"Your Mum isn't a word."

"Your life isn't a word."

"...That doesn't make sense." He shook his head, smiling. Typical boy. Quit the civil discussion just when I was winning.

"Neither do you," I stuck my tongue out, extremely maturely. "Let's play a game."

He raised his eyebrows. "Is it called Kill Max? I 100-percented it like... last month."

I smacked his stomach, glaring. "No. It's called Truths."

"Do explain." ...Really, Fang? _That _thick? Dude, I'd admit it: I was impressed. He was taking stupidity to... _Iggy_ levels. And, believe me, you did _not_ want to go there.

"You tell the truth," I said, very slowly, like I was talking to a particularly dim child... which, to be completely honest, I was. "If you pass on a question, and I answer the very same question, I win." Of course, I forgot to mention the ways in which he might be victorious too... it was barely possibly, after all.

"And vice-versa," he amended. Boys - all they ever thought about was winning.

I nodded. "I'm going first."

"Alright." He nodded, and lay back, his whole body posture screaming 'Bring it. Do your worst'. So I screamed back, 'I _am_ your worst'. In body posture, of course. It would somewhat ruin the moment if the words came from my mouth... plus, that's _so_ last year.

"Who was your last girlfriend?" Purely experimental. Honestly. I'd totally meant to say that... Note to brain: I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT I JUST SAID THAT. YOU SUCK. HAWAII SUCKS. GO AWAY. WAIT, NO, COME BACK. I CAN'T BELIVE... oh, my God.

Fanglette didn't even send me a strange look, just closed his eyes as he answered: "A girl back at my dad's."

"When?" STOP. MOVING. MOUTH.

"We broke up when I left." He shrugged, eyes still shut.

"How long did you date?" Gun, please. I needed to shoot myself... desperately.

"A year."

"What was her name?" Oh my God. WHY? WHAT'S SO GREAT ABOUT HAWAII ANYWAY?

"Rachel Peace."

"...Did you love her?" Past tense. At least I'd used past tense... who was I kidding, I was a brainless moron.

Finally, he opened one eye, and looked at me. I couldn't read his expression - which was extremely weird, since... I could always read his expression. Well... almost, I guess.

"Yeah."

"Cool." I twiddled with a piece of hair, not meeting his eyes.

"How many questions do you get, anyway? Fifty?"

"Well, if you answered them properly to begin with, retard, then I wouldn't have to ask forty-nine extra, would I?" I kicked him in the side gently (I didn't want to break my foot).

He laughed, quietly. "What happened earlier?"

"What d'you mean?" I asked, completely clueless.

He glanced at the floor, then back at me. "That's my question." No elaboration, he just expected me to... oh.

I paused. For a while. For a long while... for so long, it wasn't really a pause any more, though what's with defining pauses? Cool it, guys, you're so judgemental these days. If I wanted to call my silence a pause, I would. So stick that in your pipe and smoke it!

"Can't we just..." I struggled to find the words... and flipped through my mental pocket Maxtionary (just $299.99! Get it implanted while you wait!), "forget about it?"

There was a long pause (no. Don't even open your mouth), before Fanglette looked up, and spoke again. "I don't want to."

"Look, Batty, I don't want a boyfriend. I'm sorry, but... you saw how it turned out with Dylan! And, I mean, I only broke up with him yesterday! What kind of a slav would I be if I immediately started dating you? I... it's ridiculous." I was stumbling over my words - probably because I'd been too cheap to buy the angel-style invisible Maxtionary that appeared on your shoulder in difficult situations, and-Fang looked up at me, really looked, and I lost sense of most thoughts, except _holy shit._

"Okay," he said, simply. Was that it? Really? "Okay," he repeated, eyes still hand-in-hand (pupil-in-pupil?) with mine. "...But I don't want to forget it."

Wait... what?

He smiled, just a little, and I realised that I must have said that last bit out loud. "I'm not going to force you into anything you don't want to do." I raised my eyebrows, surprised and a little amazed that he was being so... nice. "I'm going to persuade you."

Ah, there was the evil Batfang I knew and hated. Hated. Definitely not loved.

I kept badgering him about what the hell he was going to do to... 'persuade' me, but he completely ignored me, instead continuing on the Truths game, and claiming random characters for his army, which I in turn promised to obliterate every time he mentioned it.

By six am, I knew a whole lot about him. His favourite colour? Baby pink (well... it started it with a B, at least). Movie? Love, Actually (mm... it might have rhymed with Bord Bof Bhe Bings, but I think he was lying).

And a whole load more.

At seven, I slapped him round the face, and walked out. Hey, I was tired... plus, I thought that was the most effective way to, you know, announce my exit. God knows what he was going to do to me the next day, what with this insane persuading thing that he just would _not_ talk about.

What a _boy._

**A/N: Hey, it was long. Forgiven? Thanks, love you too. **

**Posted for Project PULL. **

**Question - have you ever spent a Christmas abroad? How was it? **

**Note: hey, HGW... where'd you go? I miss you like the shit, girl. I'm sorry forbeing a crappy British friend... be my awesome Australian friend again? Pretty please? **

**Much love, guys. Happy new year and all that shtuff. **

**Review?**


	26. Chapter 26

**Disclaimer: Nope.**

**A/N: The amount of faith you guys have in me is incredible. The number of reviews never fails to astound me - thank you. I'm getting around to editing the first few chapters - anyone want to give me a hand? (; They really are in grammatical shambles. **

**Enjoy!**

I booted up my own laptop, which I'd run to get from my house, along with the little bubbles of happiness (read as: Malteasers) Ella keeps under her pillow which she thinks I don't know about.

It was eight am (bloody miracle for me, considering I didn't usually rise from the land of the technically but not really dead until gone midday. Insomniac, 'kay? It's different from insane maniac, before you start), and I was bored as hell. Maybe walking out on Fanglette wasn't the cleverest thing I'd ever done. But he was being so damn _irritating._ Still was really, without even being in the room - I couldn't get his stupid freaking persuasion idea out of my head.

What was he gonna do? Try and beat me up? As if. I'd just threaten Mary. Insult me? I'd grab a mirror (insult enough). Talk to me constantly to try and drive me insane? That'd be the second use of the Maxtionary coming in handy - smacking twits over the head. Invade Amaxica? I'd laugh. No one got past me and my Legolas - our love? Undefeated. Granted, not many people had tried or anything, apart from that elf thing who was his girlfriend before me. She will only be referred to as _the other woman _in my presence.

Bloody hell, boys. I'd only just broken up with Dylan, for crying out loud! Though, to be honest, we only ever hugged once. Never held hands. Never really went out, just the two of us. All along, it was just like being better friends than before - it was awkward, weird, and I was pretty sure he'd felt the same way about it as I did: ew.

My laptop finally burst into life, and I keyed in my password (AMAXICAFORTHEWORLD) before bringing up the internet browser, and checking my email.

**TO: Max Martinez.**

**FROM: Valencia Martinez. **

**SUBJECT: RE: England. **

**Hello again, dear, just wanted to fill you in on the bring-a-friend situation. Apparently Ella wants to bring both Nudge and Sara, who've both okay-ed it with their parents, so as long as Fang and Iggy check with Jane, they're both free to come. **

**There's a link to a print-out sheet of your tickets - I've booked six, but it's fine if you just bring one friend in the end (I'm sure Ella has a endless supply. How she pays them all, I'll never know... kidding, of course!). I'm sure you'll be very pleased with them. **

**It's fine out here - rainy of course, but I've fallen in love with all the different types of tea! You'll love London. The business is doing well! **

**Have a good time at the party, Max, and give my love to Ella too! **

**Mum xxx**

I rolled my eyes, and clicked the link to our tickets. After scanning them, I immediately loved my mother more - first class, prime seats. Perfect. I dragged up the email again, and tapped reply.

**TO: Valencia Martinez. **

**FROM: Max Martinez. **

**SUBJECT: RE: England.**

**Hey, Mum. Yeah, yeah, I'll bring the idiots, unless they really annoy me before tomorrow. Hey, that's both of them out then. **

**First class? Wow. Someone pulled some strings, huh? Thanks, though. :) **

**Rainy? Mum, it's England. That's a given. Me, love London? Like I already don't? It's the capital of the Brits, Mum, London's pure awesome. **

**Looking forward to seeing you... **

**Max. **

**P.S. What does it mean if someone tries to persuade you to do something?**

I pressed send before I could erase the last part like I wanted to. Mum would be able to give me at least a little insight, being super-smart and everything (a gene I definitely didn't inherit. It looked like it'd skipped a house, and landed in Angel. At the age of six. Brilliant).

Argh, it was only 8:30am, and still neither of the twits had stirred - lazy arseholes. Just couldn't drag themselves out of bed. Shocking, just shocking. In fact, they needed waking up, Max-style. Hell yeah.

Closing the lid on my laptop, I stalked into the kitchen, grabbed two pans, blu-tac, a jug full of ice-cold water, a piece of string and the whipped cream in the fridge we'd sprayed on the cookies last night (too, much, and sugar are words that don't even belong in the same sentence). I tucked them all under my arm, carrying the jug carefully, and ran upstairs, opening the door and tiptoeing into Fanglette's room somewhat silently. He was just lying, as normally as a sleeping person can, on his bed, fast asleep. Damn, and I'd been hoping for drool.

As quietly as I could, I placed everything on the floor before retrieving the string, whipped cream, jug of water, and blu-tac. I knelt down next to his bed, and attached the string from the bed-post to the wall using the blu-tac. Hmm. Where to spray the whipped cream? I took a few mahoosive (Maxtionary. Get it now. It's endorsed by celebrities i.e. me) steps forward, and lay an under-sheet from Fangtard's cupboard down, before spraying it corner-to-corner with thick whipped cream. Excellent. All set up down there... now, just for the quick part, that actually required a bit of skill... no jokes required there, thank you.

I retrieved the jug, and stood on the opposite side of the bed from where Batfang lay. Carefully, I placed the jug just close enough to his head that it would tip if he moved even a millimetre, but not until he did. Then I grabbed the pans, and legged it the hell out of that cave.

No need to congratulate me, guys. I know, I know. Genius ol' me. I'd say I try, but... I don't.

A moment later, I heard water splashing, and Batty grunted. I pressed myself against his door, squinting through the slit at the side. Sure enough, he was soaked, and swearing softly to himself. He heaved himself out of bed, taking a few steps forward before tripping on the string, and falling face-forward into the cream.

See, I'm no major songwriter or anything, but... _that's what you get when you piss off Max Martinez_. Someone needs to tweet Hayley Williams that.

I opened the door, doubled over laughing, just as he looked up. Our eyes met, his pathetically distressed, mine creased with laughter. Then he smiled.

The guy was covered in whipped-cream, soaked through, and he was _smiling._ Goddamn it, he was meant to have broken down in tears by that point! Ah well. Ig'd definitely made up for him on the dramatics front...

"What was that for?" Fangenstein asked eventually, once he'd gotten up, changed clothes and everything. I'd made him clean up after himself, too - after all, he was the one who tipped water all over himself, and fallen into whipped-cream. How was I meant to know how the hell it all got there? I'd offered him lessons in staying upright (as that seemed to be the main problem), but he didn't seem particularly keen (he threw a book at my head).

I shrugged, grinning. "Bored."

He rolled his eyes. "Figures."

"Want to help me wake up Iggy?"

"Max-style?"

"'Course."

"I'll get the camera."

10 minutes later, we were all set up in Ig's room; we'd propped up the Flip on the windowsill, where it had a perfect view of both Ig sprawled on his bed drooling, Ke$ha, Fanglette, and me. I was positioned behind his drum-set, pans in either hand. Fangenstein stood beside me, his electric guitar in his hands - it was plugged into his amp, and turned up to full volume. He'd done something cool with the switches too, so it sounded all grunge-y and awesome. Remind me to employ a spy to find out how he does that. Or just Google it, if they're lazy. Wonder if Katniss is free?

"Ready?" I whispered to Batty, who nodded. "3, 2, 1..."

I smashed the pans down on the cymbals as hard as I could a million and twenty-two times, whilst at the same time Fanglette strummed a random pattern on his guitar.

Iggy literally jumped a foot into the air - I'm not kidding, his _whole body_ left the bed - and he burst into tears. Actual tears. Fangenstein slowly turned to look at me, and we both just cracked up laughing.

Looking at us through betrayed eyes, Ig sobbed, "Fang... how could you do this to Psycho?"

Fanglette raised his eyebrows. "...Psycho?"

"OUR _CHILD!"_ Ig leapt off the bed, and ran out of the room, crying loudly.

...Ha.

...Haha.

...Hahaha.

..., God, I love Ig.

I ran to Cassie, grinned into the lens, and said, "And that, folks, is how to wake your best friend up when they're being a lazy igiot."

**[ x x x ] **

Nudge's party wasn't until five, so we had plenty of time to arse around all afternoon once Ig'd spent an hour locked in the bathroom trying to calm himself down, and 'save the baby'. Igiot.

At least, that's what we'd thought.

At 2pm, the doorbell rang - ominous enough, since Jane'd taken the kids out, and we all knew Ig and Fanglette had no friends besides their imaginary children.

Opening it, we found the devil.

"Go away, Ella."

She grinned, swinging her scarily large bag between her hands. "Nope. I'm your personal stylist for the day!"

"It's going to take more than a day, darling," Ig said from behind me, adopting a camp high-pitched voice. He was elbowed. In the face.

I was dragged upstairs before I could slam the door in her face, and pushed into the bathroom. Ella instructed me to change into the clothes she'd prepared for me, before leaving, and locking the door behind her.

Love you too, sis. She's just such a lovely, kind, caring person. Always thinking about other people, Ella Martinez.

Grumbling to myself and bracing myself for the worst, I opened the bag she'd left - yup, definitely some floaty material being annoyingly Ella-ish in there... Ah. She'd packed long black leggings, a light green, button-down dress that came to about mid-thigh, but no shoes. Oh God, not the bloody shoes again... she'd have a freaking aneurysm this time.

Sighing, and cursing my darling sister to the deepest pits of hell, I shoved the disgusting girl-like clothes things on me. Ugh. God forbid my army saw me looking like _that._ A few minutes later, Ella walked back in, carrying yet another bag. She looked me up and down approvingly.

"You'll do," she said passively, throwing the bag at me - abuse! "Chuck those on. I'll do your make-up and hair in a moment."

Curious (stupid Max! Never be curious! It leads to certain death. Or certain boredom, whichever came first), I unzipped it to find my camouflage army converse. I glanced over at El, suspicious, but she was busy laying out a million different shades of green eyeshadow. Ew, make-up.

Nevertheless, I pulled my Converse on, and subjected myself to her torture. I'd get her back later tonight. Once she was done plastic-fying me, she produced several green hair-slides, and proceeded to plait, twist, curl, and pin my hair in various positions. I felt like a freaking Voodoo doll by the time she was done...

Finally finished, after what seemed like hours of intenseness, she passed me a small box, and grinned.

"Put those in."

I sighed, but opened the box anyway. Inside were two little green flowers made of jewels - earrings. I pulled them out carefully, and pushed them through my ears, still sighing to myself.

"Lovely," Ella decided, surveying me. "What's with you, anyway? You're taking this way too easily."

I sniffed. "Don't know what you're talking about."

"Well," she said, rolling her eyes, "you've only pretended to slip and stomp on my foot twice. And you haven't punched me once, thank God! Who the hell are you, and what've you done with our Max?"

I just sighed.

Ella grimaced, and her eyes softened. "Hey. Is this about last night?"

"Nah," I replied, truthfully. "I'm just tired. Only got one hour's sleep."

Ella laughed, relaxing. "Okay. You go get some coffee so you can be your abnormally violent and highly annoying self, while I go change."

I nodded, standing and opening the door, before turning back. "What am I meant to be, anyway?" Well, it was fancy dress, and I didn't think Nudge would appreciate me going as the colour green.

Ella looked at me like I was stupid (yes, yes, insert cheap gag here). "_Really, _Max?" I narrowed my eyes to a glare, raising my eyebrows. "Someone's waking up!" She giggled, and I raised my fist. She held her hands up in surrender, still giggling. "Okay, okay! You're an elf."

Um... what?

"You know, because you're always talking about that Legolas guy," she smiled. "Now you can tell everyone you're his elf wife."

I grinned, and grabbed her in a quick hug. "I love you."

"Dear God, emotion!" Ella winked. "Don't exhaust yourself!"

I stuck my fingers up at her, still grinning as I shut the door behind me.

**[ x x x ]**

"Hey, Batty, chuck us a can of Coke, would you?" I walked into the kitchen as he was opening the fridge. He grunted, not bothering to look over at me. So eloquent. He really does have such a charming way with words. So... _persuasive. _

He turned, to throw it at me, but his hand stopped in mid-air, his eyes widening as he looked me up and down. Slowly, his hand dropped back to his side.

"What?" I said, typically oblivious. "Dude, I'm thirsty!" The butterflies that had just broken free had a pretty large freaking thirst, and I wasn't about to deny them it. When he didn't move, apart from to smile a little, I sighed heavily, stormed forward, and grabbed it out of his hand. "Bloody useless you are, you know."

"I know," he said, grabbing me by the wrist, and planting a quick kiss on my cheek. I shoved him away, glaring. Stop burning, cheek, you didn't enjoy that, and neither did I. Instead of stepping back, though, he moved towards me again, and pressed a sweet kiss to my lips.

By that point, I was jelly. I just wanted him to kiss me again, like last night.

Oh dear God, I was practically turning into Bella freaking Swan, God help me. No. No Max, you do not like Fang. You are not a lesbian.

He was done, though, apparently, just running a hand through my hair, and smiling. "I like your hair."

And just like that, he was gone.

...So he was playing his persuasion card dirty, was he? Well, two could play at that game.

**[ x x x ]**

Fang, Ella and I all arrived at Nudge's at five on the dot - we'd asked Ig to walk with us, but he was absolutely adamant that no one would see his costume before he was ready to reveal. I'm betting a twenty that it consisted of sparkles, white skin, and a constipated face (i.e. Edward Cullen).

Fanglette was just dressed in jeans and a Bring Me The Horizon t-shirt: he'd flat-out refused the Lady GaGa costume Ella had brought for him. A shame, really, the lycra cat-suit really did bring out the brown in his eyes, and all that meat could've been extremely useful for the indoor barbecue Nudge had promised.

Ella, on the other hand, had gone all out. She had taken a shower earlier in the morning, and allowed her hair to dry naturally, so it fell in naturally gentle waves around her face. She was wearing a simple, short, white cloth dress, ripped strategically, and rubbed with dusty dirt so it looked worn and old; black leggings, ripped at the ends, and flat black boots. A captain's hat sat on her hand. Ladies and gentletwats, I introduce you to the devil, dressed as Elizabeth Swan from Pirates of The Caribbean (you know, that film with the fit pirate. Not Jack, but Will. You know, sometimes my Legolas gets jealous of him... probably because he's my man on the side. Being such an esteemed leader, I'm allowed these little benefits).

Sara opened the door, and grinned. "You guys look totally TRA!"

"TRA?" Ella asked, giving her a quick hug.

"Triple rainbow awesome!" Sara replied, way too perkily, as per usual.

Fangenstein and I exchanged a look of pure 'kill me now', as Sara tried to guess who each of us were.

Sara herself was obviously Alice, from Alice in Wonderland - she'd curled her light blonde hair into loose ringlets; wore contacts that made her eyes look extra-specially blue, and a light blue checked dress with plain sky-blue ballet pumps. Hmm. To be honest, I thought the Mad Hatter was more of a role for her, but I suppose she was just looking for the Wonderguy to her Alice (see what I did there? Hell yeah, I'm so TRA! ...Oh dear, Max, oh dear. Coolness points minus fifty).

"Come in, come in," she said, ushering us past her. "Dylan, Sam and their friends are all already here, you guys are the last."

Friends? We don't have friends, what's she on about?

"Nope," I corrected her. "Iggy wants to make a big entrance."

"Of course he does," she replied, rolling her eyes.

I laughed, following Ella into the lounge, where everyone except Nudge were sat around on sofas.

Sam and Amber sat together, Sam's arm around her shoulders, hers around his waist. Aw, cute. They were dressed as Iron Man and Peppers, from Iron Man (shocker). Honestly though, all that plastic must've been digging into poor Amber's back - now that's love, guys. Another form of love? Sitting through Twilight for your boyfriend (yes, boyfriend).

Dylan sat next to them, dressed in a big orange anorak that was pulled up to hide his face. Oh no, he did _not_ go there: no one was cool enough to be Kenny from South Park. _No one._ I was so going to have words with him about this little incident - he was commanding my armies, with his mad Golden PSP skillage (M. A. X. T. I. O. N. A. R. Y!).

The girl from yesterday, Kat, was sat beside him, wearing the same reindeer jumper that Bridget Jones was... oh. I suppose she might have been there as Bridget Jones. But that was the _clever _conclusion to jump to - and I totally got it straight off, because I was just intelligent like that. Sometimes. What the hell was she even doing there, anyway? Sure, Nudge had asked us to bring friends, but that was because she knew we didn't _have_ any!

Ooh, a new face - a girl with bright blue hair, streaked with baby pink and rich purple, sat cross-legged facing them, plaiting and untwisting her hair, bored. She wore a short black skirt, tattered black Converse hi-tops, and an All Time Low T-shirt. She also had a piece of frayed ebony ribbon tied around her index finger on her left hand - only an anime character would do that. Shame I didn't watch any of that nerdy stuff. I mean, I totally didn't cry my eyes out at Clannad, and Elfen Lied, or fall in love with Lovely Complex. Me, watch anime? Ha. 'Course not.

Everyone turned to look at us as we entered, and I grinned. "'Sup?"

"Hey, Max," Sam smiled. "Fang, El."

"Yo." So poetic, Fangspeare.

"Hi," Ella said, waving slightly. "You guys seen Nudge?"

"Nope," Sara replied, sitting down in the tiny gap between Kat and the sofa arm, spreading her legs over everyone else.

Sam shoved her legs off of him. "Dude!"

Sara grinned. "God, guys, move up! Honestly, you're all so selfish!"

Ella rolled her eyes, glancing round the room. "We need music." Everyone, minus the girl with blue hair, turned to look at me, and Sam raised his eyebrows.

"Nu-uh." I shook my head vigorously. "I'll put a CD on, that's it."

"But you listen to shit," Ella moaned, sinking down on the floor next to the other girl, who barely even acknowledged her.

I rolled my eyes, ruffling her hair. "Do I even have to remind you who stole my All Time Low CD?"

"And remind me who taped the declaration of war sheet on my door the night before?"

"Ah," I smiled, "that'd be my husband."

"I was never told of this marriage," Dylan said, obviously joking. At least, I hope.

"Sam didn't tell you?" I turned to him, outraged. "Samuel!"

"Dude, how come Sam got to go to your wedding?" Sara glared daggers at me, folding her arms.

Ella pulled her puppy-dog-eyes look on me. "I'm not awesome enough to be invited to your wedding? But Sam's a retard!"

Sam held up his hands in surrender to the abuse thrown at him. "Army perks, guys. Enrol today."

"Bit young, aren't you, Max?" Kat finally spoke up. Was that an insult? A joke? Hmph. Future prostitutes these days, honestly.

"Young for what?" Nudge entered the room, holding a spatula innocently. She was sporting a bright blue nose, and a furry costume. Some kind of bear? "Well, they all said she was too young to have an army of thousands, but she kinda blew that outta the window."

Okay. It was all spoken at 100 miles per hour, _but, _it was only two sentences, as opposed to the normal three million. Improvement, methinks?

Nudge sank down on Sara's knee, giggling as she wrapped her arms around her, and everyone else groaned at her. "So where's Ig?"

Right on cue, the doorbell rang.

"Don't let him in."

Ella rolled her eyes at me, rising to grab the door. "Wish we had another option." Uh, well, we did. We could just leave him out there to go die in a hole. YAY IGGY'S DEATH! ...No? No. Okay.

Moments later, she returned, looking scarred. Before she could open her mouth, though, there was a loud crash, and something came tumbling into the room.

And by something, I mean Iggy Griffiths. Wearing a skirt. And a brown-haired wig.

Who, promptly, looked up, saw Fangspeare, and squealed. "Oh my God, Edward! I think I have a hurty!" When Fangenstein just stood there, looking bored to everyone else, and purely terrified to me, Ig stretched out his arms. "Please! Save me! I love you more than life, you're just so amazing!"

Rolling my eyes, I signalled to Ella, who grinned. We both stepped towards him, pulled him up by one arm each, then slapped him in the face. Take _that_ for teamwork.

Iggy took a few excruciatingly slow steps forward, before falling again. Right into Batty's arms. Unsurprisingly, Fang immediately dropped him straight on the floor.

He looked up at him, eyes full of fake tears. "Edward... I'm not good enough for you! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'll kill myself!"

When Fangtard muttered, "Please do," that's when we all lost it.

Laughing like hell with your best friends? Freaking fun.

Even the blue-haired girl cracked a tiny smile.

Nudge, sighing, skipped over, and pulled him up. "Hey, Bella!"

"Hi..." Ig said, looking bored, and biting his lip. He walked - slowly - to stand in the corner of the room, where he just twirled his fake hair around his fingers, and stared at Fangenstein.

"Okay," said Nudge, moving so she was in the centre of the room. Radio Nudge, taking control. "Angel lent me her camera - you know, the really really really good one? But there's only, like, enough memory for six pictures, so we're gonna have to do them in pairs." I groaned loudly. Ew, pictures. "Shut up, Max! Anyways, you guys get paired up while I go grab the camera!"

She ran off. Ugh. Why? I mean, honestly.

Fangenstein wrapped an arm around my shoulders. "You're with me."

"Not literally," I replied, elbowing him so he'd move his arm. He just smiled his annoying little half-smile, staying close beside me.

Nudge returned, and ushered us all into a line. First off, she grabbed the obvious - Sam and Amber. Sam draped an arm around her shoulder, and she reached up to hold his hand. N'aw. Annoyingly sickening cute couple is annoyingly sickening.

Next: Dylan and Kat. They just stood side-by-side, both of them grinning, and Kat made a peace-sign. God. So prostitute-istic. Not that I'd know anything about the actions of future prost-actually, no, I do. Iggy. Let's face it: he's been pregnant twice already.

Then, Fangenstein and I. To begin with, I opted for the Kylan (what I'm calling the Dylan and Kat relationship they have going on there... sounds strangely like kill 'em...) option - just standing by each other - before I remembered about Fanglette's whole persuasion technique thing, and took another massive step away. Okay, maybe two - I'm _not_ short, I just have little legs. Before he could retaliate, Nudge snapped the picture, and waved us away. Ha.

Ig stepped up of his own accord, dragging a protesting Ella along with him. She turned away from him, and folded her arms, scowling. Just as Nudge went to get the picture, Ig, brilliantly, tripped. By accident. So the picture was of Ella stood with her back to him, as he went flying. See, guys, that's what cameras are for. Catching the most embarrassing moments you can, and haunting everyone with them.

Nudge threw the camera at Fangenstein, and instructed him to take a picture of her and Sara, acting like tits as usual.

"What about Eleni?" Kat asked, after Nudge'd finished her perfectionist photo-shoot (she became obsessed with what was in the background. She moved a flowerpot because apparently it was green in a certain light as confirmed by the camera, and she didn't want green to clash with this, this, this and that. Not. Even. Joking).

I almost asked who Eleni was, but the girl on the floor looked up. "What about me?"

"Don't be stupid, Leni, you can't-" Kat started to say, rolling her eyes, but Nudge's Mum interrupted her with her entrance.

Holding a massive stick. (No that's what she said jokes, please. You'll corrupt my innocent mind.) ...This can't be good. I can just see the headlines now: **FUTURE WORLD LEADER BRUTALLY MURDERED! (Oh, and some other kids too)**, or **THE MURDER OF MAX! - **obviously, for that one, there'd be a footnote - **all witnesses passed away too. Selfish brats, could've used a quote or two.**

"Nudge, dear, do you want to play limbo?" She smiled innocently. Okay. Might have got a _little _bit carried away there... but what would you think, if someone just wandered in with a big stick in the air? ...Okay, fine. That's what she said. See, you're damaging me already. "It's a little icy outside, but you should be fine."

Nudge grinned, and grabbed the large piece of thin wood (HA! Make a dirty joke with _that!_ Actually... please don't try) from her hand. "Thanks Mummy! GUYS! Get your lazy butts up, so I can kick 'em!"

Did I mention that we all loved Nudge? No? Good.

Sighing, we all followed her out into the cold. _A bit icy? _Try absolutely freaking freezing!

At least we weren't in shorts and t-shirts though, like in PE. We had this horrible teacher, a woman named Mrs Ogden, who felt like it was her duty to torture us - rain? Wouldn't hurt us. Snow? Grow up. Blizzard that destroyed half the USA? No match for her man boobs. She had a whole collection of little stories she'd bellow out, whenever someone brave (or trying to cause a distraction) complained, that always started off with 'When I was your age...'.

In fact, I could even imagine her now: "When I was a man..."

Iggy, whimpering, latched onto Fanglette's arm. "E-edward... I'm cold... Warm me with your eyes! Ah, your amazingness! It blinds me!"

Nudge rolled her eyes, and handed him one end of the pole. "Hold this, retard! You seem like someone who holds planks a lot."

"Well..." Ig looked at her, throwing his hair in front of his face (yay!), "I was wondering..."

"Time to take cover then," Ella grinned. "Can't have this tit wondering about anything without a freaking explosion." Dude, my little sister is actually taking over my position as the amazingly wonderful sarcastic one... hmph. Wouldn't be long until she started - I don't know - eating five pizzas at a time, and kicking people hard enough to ensure that they wouldn't be reproducing any time soon: Max Martinez trademarks.

Ig bit his lip, ignoring her, even though we were all snickering. "Do we have to play limbo? See... I was thinking we could have a quiz!"

Kat looked at him sceptically. "On what?"

"How perfect Edward is!" Ig announced, happily. "Or Wuthering Heights!"

"Or how Bella Swan has the personality of a table cloth?" Sam deadpanned, taking the other end of the stick Ig was waving about (stop with the 'that's what she said' jokes! Honestly. Don't you think we get enough of them from Ig?). "I'll watch to see if you guys hit it."

Amber threw him a 'I love you' look. "Um... You guys want me to put some music on?"

"Go ahead! Anything's good! Especially Lady GaGa, or Ke$ha! I have JLS too, somewhere..." Nudge went off on one. "Anything'll that piss Max off, really!" Love you too, dear.

I rolled my eyes, grabbing Amber by the arm as she nodded dutifully and headed off into the house, whispering, "Grab Fang's iPod from my bag, and put on Bullet For My Valentine." I winked. Amber looked a little confused, but smiled, and gave me a thumbs-up. Way too sweet for our Sam.

"Shouldn't we wait for her?" Sam asked, as Nudge gestured for Sara to go first.

"Nah," Dylan replied. "She can join in when she gets back, right?"

"Right," Sara agreed, bending under the pole easily.

We all lined up behind her, shoving and messing around. I ended up behind Eleni, who didn't look particularly happy to be joining in.

From behind me, Kat said, "Hey, Leni, you're playing?"

She turned around, unsmiling, and replied, "I am."

I caught her eyes, before she turned away, and raised a hand in some sort of wave that wasn't really a wave, just a stupid Maxified grimace. "Hi."

"Hey," she said, quietly, looking me up and down.

"I'm Max," I introduced myself.

Holding up the pole, Ig grinned, and yelled over, "She's a overly-violent, annoying unclassified animal, with an obsession with music, and a weird love for Orlando Bloom, who, by the way, isn't half as sexy as she thinks he is. Rob Pattinson beats him hands down!"

"And he says he's not gay," I muttered under my breath. Glancing up at Eleni again, I caught her smiling.

"Eleni," she nodded at me. _Kat's friend_, I added on mentally.

"Leni!" Sam called. "Your go!" And Sam's... but... there's something really wrong about that. Sam doesn't have friends!

I didn't even notice Dylan walking to the back of the line behind me, until he tapped me on the shoulder, and smiled. "Hey. We're all good, right?"

"For sure," I replied hesitantly, unintentionally ripping off Christofer Drew. I apologise, my love (oh be quiet Legolas, you know you're my number one. Honestly, fictional characters these days!).

He grinned, and slapped me a high-five. "Awesome." Then he turned around, and re-joined the queue behind Kat, who immediately struck up a conversation with him.

I guess that could've gone worse. And I didn't feel so bad any more, thank God. Boys. It would've been so much easier if he'd have pulled a Fang, and just thrown a book at my head. At least then I could've beaten him up, then make it all up the next day. So much freaking easier.

"Max!" Sam yelled, looking bored. "Get thy ass under my stick."

"That's what she said," Ig cracked up. YOU SEE WHAT I HAVE TO DEAL WITH? I shot him the bird, bending under the wood easily... at least, I thought it was easy.

I guess I just misjudged the length of my legs - see, I thought they were at least a little bit longer than that. It was a bit pathetic really. Note to self: when I rule the world, cut everyone's legs off, so I feel like a giant. Hell yeah. It happens to everyone, right? Can't just be me here, misjudging the length of my legs.

Basically, I leant back too far, tripped, and went flying into a certain emo twit, who'd headed back into the house to grab a drink a few minutes before. The aforementioned emo twit then stumbled, and fell back onto the ground, dragging me with him in the process. What a clumsy tit. I mean, honestly. He even managed to spill his drink _all over me,_ soaking El's top, and, oh, I don't know, seeping through the shirt, right into my skin, with it's freaking iciness?

"What the hell?" Fang looked right up into my eyes, and I realised with a start that I was sprawled all over him. Even though I couldn't see them, I could just sense Ella and Nudge's smirks. Ugh.

"You're such a clumsy tit," I rolled my eyes at him, trying not to smile. There was something hilarious about the situation, but a quarter of me wanted to kill Ella and Nudge for smiling. A quarter of me wanted to roll off of him, and slap him, even though technically, it was all my fault (amendment: my legs' fault, for being... erm... less vertically long than that of the average human - ha, all those calling me short). The other half of me just wanted to laugh.

"I try," he replied, his lips twitching into that annoying little half-smile that always seems to muddle up my thoughts.

"My army will be having words," I replied, quietly. "I can't guarantee that you won't get sued."

Fang chuckled. "I can't guarantee that I won't send assassins for you in the middle of the night."

I shrugged. "Legolas'll protect me, being my husband and all that jazz."

Fanglette rolled his eyes, about to respond, but all of a sudden there was a massive crash from behind us, and a sickening crack, horribly audible even over the laughter from the guys.

"Amber!" Sam yelled, sprinting past us before we could even sit up. I jumped to my feet, Fanglette right behind me.

I heard Ig swear as we all looked down on the same scene: Amber, having stumbled over the threshold, had smashed into the concrete patio - there was a large red mark on her head, and her wrist was bent back at an odd angle, clearly broken, when you factor in the cracking noise.

Oh, freaking hell.

**A/N: I apologise for any errors in the last thousand or so words, I'm writing this at 3am - the sacrifices I make for you guys, huh? (: Ah well, you're worth it. So tired right now.**

**So, I hope the long length of this chapter made up for the wait, and that you enjoyed it. There was a point - around 3500 words - where I just hated what I'd written, and nearly scrapped the whole thing, but Sara forced me to keep writing. So if you actually enjoyed this, thank Sara, not me. **

**Question: what's the best book you've read recently? [Do try to include the author, and what the book was about, I'd greatly appreciate it. Let me know if you want me to include my own in my reply!] **

**Much love, guys, you keep me sane at times. **

**Review?**


	27. Chapter 27

**Disclaimer: Girl. **

**A/N: So I've lost both a project I've been working on for months and months and months, and something that was approaching 10k that I'd been spending every spare moment I had on. All because my harddrive decided to crash. **

**There's your excuse for the delay. Sorry.**

**But here you go. I'm sorry if it's crap; I know I'm shit :)**

**EDIT: Thank you to those who pointed out the accidental name change with Matt – there was a lot of you – I apologise. That's what I get for writing at 4:30am. Should be fixed now!**

"Right," Nudge's mum took control, after being called by yours truly, and assessing the situation. "I'm going to take Amber to the A and E, but only three of you can come with us." Nudge straight away opened her mouth (oh God. Take cover), but her mum, Lisa, shook her her head. "I need to stay here sweetie, and look after the house. 'Kay?" Nudge sighed, but went and sat down on the very step Amber had tripped over.

"I'd like to go," Sam called over from where he was sat practically obsessing over Amber, face ghost-white (not like, see-through, just very white. Snow-white. See, there you go – two analogies for the price of one!). "Please."

Lisa suppressed an eye-roll, nodding. "Of course. Amber, any other preferences sweetheart?"

"Sara?" Amber replied weakly, looking at Sara with red eyes, who gave Lisa a grave thumbs-up, heading inside to grab her coat.

"Ella, you come too," Lisa made an executive decision. "Dylan, you stay behind with Monique and keep on eye on everything." Hey, why not me? I was totally responsible enough! I mean, I owned an army. "I don't trust Max and Fang not to end up throwing half the house at each other." ...Fair enough.

"We'll follow on foot," Fangenstein proffered, hooking an arm around my wet shoulders, which I immediately shook off – to hell was I adopting his lesbian germs!

"Us too," Kat said with a sweet smile, indicating her and Eleni, who looked like she wished Kat would discuss things with her aforehand – like, quite possibly, future career choices. Prostitution didn't really look like her kind of scene.

Lisa nodded, and motioned to Sam to help her pick up Amber, as to assist her in getting her in the car. "All right. I'm guessing you've been to the hospital enough times, Max, with all the fights you've been in." I nodded, looking away from everyone's probing gaze, but I didn't miss the fact that she was watching me disapprovingly. "We'll see you there in about forty minutes."

And so, Batfang and I ended up walking the long, long walk to the hospital with my ex's prostitute best friend, and her silent friend. I stalked as far away from them as I could, trying not to inhale any Kat-ness. Who wanted to smell like a... a... big-haired Belieber? (I don't actually know if she likes Justin Bieber. But I bet she does. All prostitutes do... I'm going to stop here before I make an Iggy-inspired innuendo.)

"Hey," Fang said quietly, after ten minutes of silent, tense walking. "What's up?" I glanced at him, but didn't answer. I was too busy being quiet to protest when he laced his fingers through mine. Plus, I mean it was kind of comforting. Nice to know he'd always have my back, be there for me, you know? Even if one day I was gonna have to crush his dreams, exterminate his army that he'd spent years building, then brutally murder him. Details, details.

Of course, it was inevitable that Kat would soon into the fire-breathing drag—I mean, bitchy prositute she's destined to become (she's doing pretty well, as far as I'm concerned). "So, Max."

"Kat." Fang's hand tightened on mine – a warning? Pfft. I had a whole freaking army on my side! "'Sup?"

"Well, you see," she smiled at me, all sugary-sweet. "I was wondering, were you born a bitch, or did you have to train?"

I raised my eyebrows. "Excuse me?"

"You heard me, Martinez."

"I heard," I replied. "But who said I was listening?"

"...That makes no sense." Kat looked at me like I was a pathetic loser... okay, so maybe I was, but I didn't exactly need it highlighting, and especially not by someone with a nose that could classify as it's own country. A country that would inevitably be crushed by the pure awesomeness of Amaxica.

"Neither does your face." God, sometimes I really did amaze myself with my immense maturity. I was just so high above everybody else. Practically an adult. Not one of the elderly – I couldn't be anywhere near that racist.

"God, so mature." Hey, since when she was a mind-reader?

"Whatever," I glared at her. "What's your problem with me?"

"You want me to make a list?" Fangspeare looked like he was going to protest - i.e. punch her in the face – so I stomped on his foot, and waved for to continue. "Well, you think you're so tough and cool, better than everyone else, when really you're just a bitch who dumps an amazing guy for... for an emo!"

"I resent that," Batfang interjected, looking... well, pretty pissed. I mean, I was the only one allowed to call him emo – anyone else deserved to be slaughtered by an assassin (probably Katniss, possibly Luke Dillon).

"...I don't think I'm better than you," I said. Did people really think that about me? I mean, I guess I didn't really do much talking to strangers, unless I was threatening them, but that was only because I knew how it felt to be stabbed in the back, and to hell was I about to go through that pain again by trusting just anyone. And I guess I was pretty much always the one in command, but that was only because I liked being the leader. It was what I was used to, comfortable with... not because I didn't think any of the others could do it.

Right?

"Ha," Kat spit at me. "Whatever. You're always going around like you think you're all that, and think you can just hurt Dyl like that. _I _would never hurt him."

"Good for you," I replied, still troubled about what she'd said earlier.

"You're... God, I hate you." Aw. I'd rendered her speechless with my horrible-ness. Achievement?

"Look," I held up a hand in the universal signal of quit it, "I get that we don't exactly get along. But we need to get to Amber. Can't you just ignore me for the next thirty minutes?"

"Ugh, whatever," she replied, practically ignoring me. "I don't even know this girl. Come on, Leni, let's go." She turned right around, and walked off, not even bothering to look over her shoulder. Eleni glanced at her, then at us. Then she smiled, just a little. "Leni?" Kat had one hand on her hip, looking irritated.

"I'm going with them, Kat." That was all she said. Absolutely no explanation or anything. God, was she taking lessons from Fangenstein in how to be as irritatingly cryptic and silent as possible? I swear, no one could be more freaking confusing.

Apparently, Kat knew her well enough to just storm off in a huff, rather than question her further. We all looked at each other for a moment, before I shrugged. "To Amber?"

"To Amber," Fangenstein seconded.

As we strolled, the atmosphere relaxed a lot, and soon Fang and I were back to normal, even though the things Kat had set were still on the back of my mind (not literally. Not that you'd know anyone, unless you were some kind of mind-artist, which would be way creepy). "Dumbledore's coming tonight, for his annual beard-trimming tips trade with Gandalf."

"What route's he taking?" Fang asked, quite clearly planning an ambush. Silly, silly emo boy.

"Enchanted Silvas, then right through Mushroom Plaza, then the Saa'ar path," I confided (read as: lied). "We've been planning it for the last couple of weeks."

Fang nodded, stroking his imaginary bead (a black one, of course). "Any escorts?"

"Just Frodo. He asked for Legolas, but we're going out for a meal tonight."

"You are?"

"We are."

"Fine," he replied, looking mildly annoyed. "I'll take Hermione out, then."

"Uh, good luck with that one," I rolled my eyes, turning to Eleni. "What an idiot. Who doesn't know Hermione's married?"

She rolled her eyes, unsmiling. "How long can you talk like this for?"

"Hours," we both answered at the same time, then burst out laughing.

"But we're just friends," I added quickly.

Eleni just looked at us. "Sure."

"What?" My guard was immediately up. "We are!"

"I never said you weren't."

"You _implied _it."

"You're too cautious."

"Quit changing the subject."

"Jamie thinks you should get together."

_That _snapped me out of my autopilot arguing. "Jamie Reed?"

"That's her name," Eleni glanced at me. "Angel Range. Dating Liam."

I nodded. "Yeah, we're pretty good friends. Hang on."

I fished my beloved iPhone out of my pocket and unlocked it, ignoring Fanglette's pointed eyeroll at my Legolas background. Pulling up Jamie's number (we'd swapped at the concert, since she's kind of, somewhat, just a little bit awesome, and I love her. Ish. In a non-lesbian, one of my close friends kind of way. You're so judgemental), I proceeded to text:

**You know Eleni? What the hell are you telling her about me and Fang? **

I then texted, in way of revenge, Dylan:

**Hey, Dyl, where did you meet Kat? The RSPCA? :) Unlucky, dude. **

Finally, I sent Sam the following:

**We're about five minutes away. How's Amber holding up? **

It buzzed again before I'd even slid it back into my pocket: **They think she might have a concussion. Wrist broken in 3 diff places. :/ Like wtf? She only fcking fell over! **

Oh, God. I instantly began to walk faster, forcing Fang and Eleni to speed up too. Both kept pace with me easily, and Eleni looked at me, eyes questioning.

"They think she has a concussion," I explained, before turning to Fang. "And Sam was using text speak."

Fanglette's eyes widened. "But he's a grammar Nazi."

"I know," I replied grimly. "I know."

1 number in place of a word, nd six misng ltrs: shit just got serious.

**[ x x x ]**

"It's more serious than we thought," Ella greeted us with grave, hushed words as we hurried into the little waiting room where everyone, minus Amber and Lisa (Nudge's mum, for those of you with crap memories. Did I mention that the Maxtionary increases brain awesomeness? Well, it does), who were obviously with a doctor. Or several. Maybe even four. You never know these things, let's not jump to conclusions? (I'm betting on one.) "You know the weird red mark on her head? They think it could be internal bleeding. Hey, where's...?" She trailed off, looking confused, but I just shook my head in the universal signal of 'I'll bitch about her later'.

Honestly, what had happened to simple cuts and grazes that could all be healed with a kiss from your mother? I'd say it was just Amber being deliberately difficult, but she's practically the sweetest person I know, so it doesn't really work.

"Her parents are in there with her," Iggy added, looking serious for quite possibly the first time in his life. "Sam's..." He glanced towards where Sam was slumped in a hard, plastic chair seperate from the almost ring-like formation of the other chairs. His hair was sticking out in all directions, and his skin was pale. I almost wanted to slap him for looking so damn pathetic – he was only fifteen (though nearly sixteen). It wasn't the end of the world...

Slowly, I went to go kneel on the floor beside him. "Hey." He nodded at me, almost imperceptibly. "What's up?"

"The sky."

I rolled my eyes. "You okay?"

"Depends."

"On?"

"Whether you're going to hit me if I quote Gerard Way."

"Hm... maybe."

"Famous last words."

"Ironic."

"We're just teenagers."

"Funny."

"So's your mama."

"Enchanting."

"Just so long as you're not disenchanted."

…If you can't beat 'em, join 'em.

"You're just so funny. You're the only hope for me."

"Sorry, I have a bulletproof heart. That includes Max-proof."

"You giving me hell, kid."

"Thank you for the venom."

"Any time. I don't love you any more."

"Gutted. Bury me in black."

"You, dead? Heaven help us."

"I know. You even said that the jetset life was gonna kill me."

"I guess this is the end for you..."

"It's okay, my way home is way through you."

"Oh God, not the ghost of you."

"Yup. That's what you get when I'm dead!"

"At least I won't have to do a cemetery drive."

"Yo, Jet Star and Kobrakid?" Ella rolled her eyes as we both turned to her instantly. "Shut the hell-"

She was cut off when Ig grabbed her in a crushing hug. "YOU KNOW WHO MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE ARE!"

Seconds later, he was on the floor, clutching his nose – Ella had, quite brilliantly, socked him in the face. "Obviously. I'm, like, marrying Gerard Way."

_Heeeeeeell naw. _"Tell me you didn't just say that." She just grinned in response as she leant down to help Ig up – see, that's where I'd have kicked him where it hurts. She still had much to learn. "Dude, my last name _is _Way."

"Whatever, Martinez." Oh-so-maturely, she stuck her tongue out.

"Don't use your own last name as an insult!"

"Fine." She amended her earlier statement: "Whatever, so does your mum."

I held up two fingers. "One, that doesn't make any sense, and two, WE HAVE THE SAME MUM."

She thought for one long moment. "...So does your mum."

And I'm related to this _igiot._

**[ x x x ]**

It wasn't for another thirty minutes or so of sitting with the tits I call my friends that Lisa poked her head out of a door, and beckoned for us to come in.

Sam took a deep breath, and stood up. I tapped him on the shoulder, and whispered: "Look alive, sunshine." He threw me a weird version of a thankful smile, and went ahead as I ducked back to Fangenstein's side.

He eyed me cautiously for a moment, before nodding, and gesturing for me to go ahead... hm. Fangleman? No... Gentlefang! Brilliant. Eleni followed behind us, with Ella and Iggy.

Inside, Lisa led us through a relatively clean-looking ward where there were some kids our age (no one we recognised though – we don't have _friends_, what on Earth were you thinking?) into a little side-room. Amber sat on a plush chair, surrounded by her parents and her two little twin sisters, looking a little bit dazzled by everything; a doctor was stood by desk on the far side of the room, scribbling something down.

Sam, for all his Romeo-like dramatics outside, looked like he didn't have a clue what to do. "Uh... hi."

Amber cocked her head to one side, wincing slightly as it moved, her beautiful long hair falling to one side. "Um... I'm really sorry, I think I know you from somewhere, but I just can't think of it..." Sam stiffened, his back going completely straight. "Volunteering?"

"Amber, sweetheart, Sam is your-"

"Good friend," Sam cut off her mum, who looked at him as if to say 'you're dumping my daughter _now? _You do _not _want to do that..'.

"Oh, okay," Amber smiled at him, then looked over her shoulder at us. "Max! Fang! Hi guys!"

What the hell? She remembered us, but not her freaking boyfriend?

"Hey," Ella took charge, going to kneel in the space her father had just vacated. "How you feeling, girl?"

Iggy joined the two of them, and the rest of us took a few steps back. The doctor soon came to join us, explaining gravely that Amber had selective amnesia – it was a strange occurrence as normally amnesia happened from a knock to the head significantly harder than that of just a fall, but after inspection, they'd realised that there was metal plating under the surface of the cement tiles used for Nudge's patio.

Because that's perfectly normal. Just stick a bit of metal in there, not dangerous in the slightest.

Anyway, it basically meant that Amber remembered some things – like volunteering, who she was, her family – but forgot others – her last year of school, where she lived, her best friend, and... Sam. Shit, that's got to hurt... God, imagine if that happened to me and F—Legolas. Yes. Not a lesbian with a fringe named Mary.

"I, uh, I'm gonna go get some water or something," Sam stumbled over his words, already heading for the door.

"Okay!" Amber gave him a big beaming smile, completely ignorant. "See you in a minute, Sam." She was so perky, and she didn't even realise that that was her boyfriend of what, almost a year and six months? Damn.

"We'll all come with you," I decided. "Let Amber have some time with her parents." Everyone nodded, and a few moments later we were all stood outside a closed door.

"Sam," Sara placed a hand on his shoulder, "are you okay?"

He nodded, face like a brick (not literally). "Fine. Let's go."

I pulled a face at Fang, who just shrugged as if saying '_What can you do?'. _We all followed Sam through a little waiting area, where Ig stopped dead (again, not literally. I _wish_).

"AIDEN!" He went running at some poor guy stood there talking to someone, enveloping him a massive hug. Oh, for crying out loud.

My face met my palm for a moment, as everyone stared at him, before I stomped after him, and pulled him a few steps back by his hair. "Okay, two things." I yanked his head back again. "One." And again. "What've we told you about talking to strangers?" Once again. "Two." Yank. "Personal." Yank. "Space." Yank. "You." Yank. "Tit."

Satisfied, I let go of him. Unfortunately, he just grinned his big stupid grin at the guy again. "I love you Aiden..."

I shook my head, looking at the guy and expecting an extremely scared face. Instead, he smiled. "Pretty hard not to."

Then I looked a bit closer. And... well. One word: damn. I looked back at Ella and Nudge, who'd both glanced at me at the same time, and all three of us started giggling, because, for once, we were all thinking the same thing. _Damn. _

So, okay. Let's be honest: I'm not girly, at all, in any way, shape, or form. But at the end of the day, I _am _a girl, and it's kind of hard not to notice when someone's as attractive as Aiden. He had a massive brown bush on his head, but it kind of suited him, and he had those kind of eyes that made you think you could go for a midnight swim in. God, that was disgustingly poetic. Anyway, he was good-looking...

"I mean, how many girls aren't in love with me?"

...And damn, did he know it.

Soon enough, everyone was surrounding us, a little group, while Ig explained how he knew Aiden. "He's the new transfer student, and I got to look after him!" He grinned happily. "Right, honeybunch?"

Ella gaped. "Hang on, my phone's just ringing..." It wasn't. She was a blatant liar. ...Aw, I'm so proud. She ducked away for a moment, while everyone watched. "Mm... hmm... Yeah, yeah, I'll tell him. See you soon!" She flicked her phone shut, and turned to Iggy accusingly. "Anything to say?"

"I think I want to marry Aiden."

"Anything else?"

"I bet he sparkles in the sun."

"Please leave me alone." That one came from Aiden, who looked alarmed.

"BUT I LOV-"

I slapped a hand over his mouth. "Inside voice."

"Or none at all," Fang suggested. "That'd work."

"So, _anyway_," Ella called our attention back to her. "I just got a phonecall from Pikachu, who's in tears."

Oh, my God. _Really? _Why do these things always happen to me?

"Hmph," Iggy pouted. "She's always with that Ash kid."

"That doesn't give you the right to get it on with Aiden!"

"Aiden loves me too!"

"You and Pikachu are together!"

"So are me and Aiden!"

"Uh, if I could just interrupt?" Aiden raised a hand. "Actually, Iggy, it's common knowledge that I _hate _you. But if you'd like to join my official fanclub, then there are business cards available."

"But... but..."

Aiden held up a finger. "No buts. Unless they belong to a female." The girls in the room pulled faces while the guys laughed and held up their hands for a high-five. Typical. Arseholes. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I must be going for my checkup. Matt, you wait here, I'll be ten minutes?"

The guy with him, who we'd noticed earlier – Matt – nodded. "'Kay, bro."

"Sam, you want water?" I turned to him quizzically; he hadn't said a word, but fair enough, he'd gotta have been freaking crushed. He nodded, looking a bit out of it, and I signalled to everyone to follow. "Let's go."

**/3rd Person POV\\**

Eleni watched the others go, wondering if she should follow – it wasn't like she was one of them. Besides, she felt bad about what Kat had said to Max, earlier. What the hell was the idiot thinking? Max probably thought she agreed with Kat, and Eleni wasn't one for judging anyone before she knew them.

So instead of following the decidedly awesome freak crew, she leaned back against a wall and gazed down at her black Converse; she'd removed the laces a few months ago, and replaced them with vibrant pink ribbon. Pretty interesting stuff.

"Um, hey," Aiden's friend – Matt, she thought – spoke, in a surprisingly soft voice. Glancing up, she saw he was smiling, a rather nice sight. "I'm Matt."

She studied him for a moment – taking in the long, floppy black hair, gauges, lip piercing, and _awesome _Linkin Park t-shirt – before nodding slightly. "Hey. Eleni."

"Wow," he said, running a hand through his hair nervously. "Awesome name. Mean anything, or...?" She shook her head mutely. "Uh, right, cool. I, uh, really like your hair. It's really... just, wow."

"Thanks," she replied, a bit bemused as to the kind compliments, and not really knowing what to say. "You're related to Aiden?"

He nodded eagerly, seemingly pleased she was getting involved in the conversation. "Yeah, he's my twin. He's kind of an arse, but he's all right really, once you get to know him. He has diabetes, see, so we're here for his monthly check up. How come you're here?"

"Our friend," Eleni said haltingly, not quite sure how to phrase it, since, technically, she didn't really know Amber, even though they went to the same school. "She got amnesia."

"Oh, man," Matt bit his lip, "I'm sorry, that sucks. It bad?"

"Seems to remember everything except her boyfriend of like 2 years."

Matt pulled an 'ouch' face, and Eleni nodded. "Poor guy."

"Mm."

"So, uh," Matt took a step forward, tripped over the carpet where it ended, and landed face-first in a plant-pot.

..._Real smooth, Matt, real smooth. _

Eleni slowly walked over to him, hiding a slight smile as she extended a hand. "Idiot."

Gratefully, he took it, spitting dirt out. "I don't even need to try. Sorry." He laughed nervously, running a hand through his hair again.

She looked up at him out of the corner of her eye, noticing for the first time that... well, he was kind of attractive. "It's okay."

He smiled. "So, uh, you guys are all in costume, right? Who are you?"

"Eleni," she shrugged helpfully.

He rolled his eyes, taking a step back to look at her fully. "You look like Ramona, kinda. You know, from Scott Pilgrim?" Actually, it was her very favourite film of all time, and she could've ranted for an eternity on it, but she just nodded. "Sorry, I'm a massive geek. Wouldn't guess it, huh?"

She gestured lamely to his t-shirt. "Amazing band."

"God, I know," his eyes sparked, and Eleni got the feeling that music was something he felt pretty strongly about. "I, uh, am actually going to see them next weekend."

"Jealous." And she was. Very much so. In fact, her eyes looked a little emerald-ish.

"Actually, see, the thing is," he fidgeted with his hands, "I have a spare ticket, if you're, uh, interested."

Eleni so wanted to say yes. So, so, so wanted to.

But she didn't.

"No, thank you."

"Next time?"

"Doubtful."

**A/N: So. There you go. Hope it satisfies you, just a little, it's a long one too.**

**Are you guys okay with me using 3rd POV so far in? See, I want to start focusing on things other than Fax's developing relationship – though, obviously, that's the most important thing at this point, and definitely won't change – but if you all hate me doing this, then I'll... prohibit it. I'm aware that it's not particularly funny, but I think it'll add a much-needed element of _some _seriousness. **

**I apologise for not replying to the vast majority to reviews; I felt it was a little late. **

**I'm also still looking for some help beta-ing the first chapters, if anyone's willing to help. **

**Question: what's the most mental, but kind of sweet, thing one of your friends has ever done for you? **

**Next time I see you guys, me & Sara will have met Christofer Drew. I hope you're all sufficiently jealous. **

**Revieweth?**


	28. Chapter 28

**Disclaimer: I'll just keep on dreaming. **

**A/N: Response for the previous chapter was lovely, and a bit unexpected after such a long delay, but thank you all so much, the vast majority of reviews have been replied to! **

**(: The first half of this chapter's a bit of a mishmash of little scenes, but it's all chronological and makes sense, so I hope you like it, I love this style of writing. **

We didn't get back from the hospital until eight pm – everyone except me, El, Gentlefang, Iggy (unfortunately), Sara, and, obviously, Nudge left, thanking Lisa for everything. Scarily for us, we were staying the night in the broadcasting station of Radio Nudge, i.e. her house.

We trooped up to her room – a scary combination of bright pink and Justin Bieber – where Nudge instructed us to wait while she changed in her en suite bathroom. There was silence. We were all pretty... sad, and worrying about Amber. I lay down on Nudge's bed, folding my arms behind my head and gazing up at the ceiling.

"So," Iggy broke the silence. "What does everyone think of my new girlfriend?"

Ella turned to look at him – she'd been inspecting her nails. God forbid one be chipped. "Who?"

"Aiden, of _course._" He looked at her like she was stupid (a personality trait in her that didn't exactly need highlighting. It was always front and centre, with El). "I think it's love. I really do."

Ella rolled her eyes. "Sure."

"Thoughts on my honey pumpkin bunny humper?"

There was a long, long silence, until Sara apparently couldn't hold it in any longer, and burst out laughing. "You didn't just call him that."

"What?" Ig was completely oblivious.

"You just..." Sara gave up. "Oh, never mind."

Ella giggled. "You get used to the stupidity after a while."

"And learn to ignore him," Nudge winked, re-entering. "Hey, guys!"

"Wow," both Ella and Sara said at the same time, giggling before Sara continued. "Nudge, you look gorgeous!"

Ella raised a hand. "Seconded."

Nudge just rolled her eyes. "Whatever. Iggy... what the hell are you..." She trailed off, apparently not having the words to continue. I lifted my head for just long enough to see Iggy trying to hold Fanglette's hand while Fang simultaneously tried to wrestle his hand away from Iggy's.

"But, _Edward!" _

Of course. It's not really Iggy, it's Bella Swan – he'd taken the wig and skirt stuff off before leaving for the hospital.

"Leave. Me. Alone."

Iggy sighed, turning to the rest of us. "He's such a _man._" He dragged out the last word, waggling his eyebrows unnecessarily.

I sighed, jumping off the bed. "You give me nightmares," I directed at Iggy, before heading for the door. "I'm going for a walk. _Alone._"

I didn't give anyone time to protest before I walked out.

**[3rd person POV]**

"God, would you sit down? You ruining my beauty sleep," Aiden complained, before giving it a second thought. "Well. I don't need it, but still, you're annoying the shit out of me!"

Matt ignored him, pacing up and down their shared room – it was a bombshell, since it _was _the home of two teenage boys. What else would anyone expect?

"Okay," Aiden tried again. "If I let you talk about whatever's going on in your messed-up freaking head, will you let me sleep?"

Again, Matt ignored him. "Do you think my lip piercing is creepy?"

Aiden mentally cursed everything and everyone living on the earth at that moment. Especially his freaking twin brother. "Yes, yes, a million freaking times yes."

"Hmm..." Matt mused. "D'you think _she _found it creepy?"

"I'm pretty sure Sierra Kusterbeck could not give less of a shit about the stupid ring through your lip."

"No,_ Eleni_."

Aiden pulled a face. "That chick with blue hair? She looks just as weird as you." He paused, before adding, "And believe me, that's not a compliment dude."

"She's beautiful," Matt countered, like it was a given. "Do you think she could tell I liked her?"

"Oh, I don't know," Aiden said, piling on the sarcasm. "You complimented everything about her, save for her little toe, and invited her to a concert. What do _you_ think?"

"Mm, you're right," Matt agreed. "She definitely couldn't tell."

Aiden smashed his face into his pillow multiple times before replying. "Yup."

"She gave me her number."

"Congratulations."

"Maybe I could convince her to come with me?" Matt ran his hands through his hair, which was now sticking up in all directions. "I have almost a week, it's the holidays..."

"Give her a Christmas present," Aiden suggested.

As per usual, Matt ignored him. "I could take her out for coffee..."

Aiden wished he was dead. That, or Matt would GO TO FREAKING BED. "Good luck with that."

"Get her a Christmas present, surprise her..."

Of course, when it came from Aiden, it was a shit idea, but when _Matt _thought of it... "Sounds good."

"I could text her now, organise it early."

"Maybe not."

"What? Why not?"

"Because _it's 3am _and most sane people are _asleep right now._" Aiden whispered, with a deadly glare at Matt.

"Uh... night?"

"Good Matt."

"Fuck you, I'm not a dog."

"Language."

"Face appearance."

"Too gorgeous for mortal eyes?"

"Opposite."

"I really hate you."

"God, Aiden," Matt looked at him blearily from his bed, hiding a smile. "Shut up, would you? Some people are trying to sleep!"

Aiden just rolled his eyes before _finally_ sinking into a deep sleep.

**[ x x x ]**

**Welcome to Facebook, **Eleni James.

Kat Stevens **sent you a message. **

**Today, 2:58pm.**

Hey, what the hell's up with you going with that bitch, Leni? Don't make me regret being friends with you.

**Today, 8:46pm.**

Leave me alone, Kat.

**Today, 8:48pm.**

Oh, so now she's stealing my best friend too. I see how it is.

**Today, 8:54pm.**

No, Kat. You were way out of line. She's a good person.

**Today, 8:55pm.**

SHE'S A BITCH! You saw what she did to Dyl! It's not fair!

**9:01pm.**

She dumped a guy you liked for years; fair enough on Max's part.

**9:02pm.**

So it's Max to you, is it? Huh. More like Maximum _Bitch._

**9:08pm.**

Kat, we're not having this conversation.

Jamie Reed **wrote on your wall:**

HEY! Leni! You coming to the gig in a few weeks? We're playing the Academy – I know, right? :D We're trying to get Max and the guys to come dual headline with us, but we haven't gotten through to them yet. Aresholes ;D Let us know, would you? We might need a fill-in bassist.

**Eleni James: **I'll be there.

^Jamie Reed, Liam Downs **and **two others **like this.**

**Jamie Reed: **:)

^**Six people **like **this.**

**Liam Downs: **:)

**Tom Reynolds: **^Those are their 'I just got banged' faces.

^**Max Martinez **and **55 others **like **this.**

**Jamie Reed: **STFU! I HAVE MY MUM ON THIS!

**Tom Reynolds: **Even better.

**James 'Iggy' Griffiths: **Tom, I disagree, I think those are their 'totally stoned and out of my mind' faces.

^**43 people **like **this.**

**Jamie Reed: **Oh my God, shut up!

**James 'Iggy' Griffiths: **:D

**Ella Martinez: **That's his 'excited' face. I'm not going any further into that one ;D

**Max Martinez: **That's her 'I'm excited he's excited' face. Make of that what you will.

**Jamie Reed:** I hate you all :(

**Max Martinez: **That's it, Jame, keep it allll inside.

**Tom Reynolds: **^That's what she said.

**^116 people **like **this.**

**Ella Martinez: **You wish she would.

**Jamie Reed: **That's it. Good bye, you're all officially dead to me.

**Max Martinez: **Seeya on the other side.

**Jamie Reed: **I'll text you later.

**Tom Reynolds: **^Fail.

**[ x x x ]**

"Get. Off. Me."

"No, this is fun!"

"Keep it PG," Iggy yelled, causing Ella, who was doing his make-up, to laugh.

"No," Fang flat-out refused to put on the high-heels that Sara was now thrusting in his face.

The three girls had decided to attack the guys after Max had gone... with make-up, bras (stuffed with toilet paper), and, the latest, stilettos. Nudge and Sara had been forced to tie Fang to a chair (with the help of everyone else) with scarves, but he still tried to adamantly refuse practically... well, no, he _did _try to refuse everything.

Ha, he wished.

"Shut _up_," Nudge said, for once in her life, cramming Fang's size eight feet into her size five heels with Sara's help.

Fang sighed, leant back, and wished he was dead. Or, at least, that he knew what was going on with Max. He'd find out later, though, even if it had to be on the long plane ride tomorrow.

**[ x x x ]**

It was, as usual, freaking _cold _outside. It was also icy as hell, not to mention pitch-black meaning I had to be careful about where I stepped.

I'd just wanted to get away, really. I guess... I guess what Kat'd said earlier had really struck a chord with me. Did I really act like some kind of queen? I didn't try to. I mean, bossy, sure, but better than everyone else?

I ran a hand through my messy hair, having the sudden urge to just... cry. Ugh. But Maximum Ride didn't cry. Maximum Ride was strong, and full of world-suck-depleting awesomeness. Maximum Ride... thought she was above crying.

Guess what?

I found out I kind of wasn't. I felt like hitting myself when the first tears pricked, hot in my eyes – it was just some bitchy girl, with stupid comments that I knew any of the guys would immediately protest, because even though I somewhat always managed to say the wrong thing, they kind of had to love me.

Surprising me, my phone buzzed.

**I did indeed tell Eleni that. Just get together already! - J**

Jamie. Of course.

_Oh get lost Jame, we're just friends. _

**Hey. You okay?**

_Just fine. _

**...Good. Anyway, you up for a gig in January?**

_Elaborate?_

**January 19th, the Academy. Dual headline with us. **

_As in, people would actually support _us_?_

**Yup. Gotta go, Liam wants me to actually pay attention to some movie he's put on – I mean, as if? Haha, get back to me, we need to meet up soonnn, I miss you! Lessthanthree :)**

I rolled my eyes, the idea of a gig already beginning to cheer me up.

Besides, I could prove to Kat that I was totally one of the guys. Not someone who sat on the sidelines and picked faults. Ha. I stomped the frost off my shoes, and started to head back to Nudge's.

I let myself in, revelling as the feeling slowly began to come back to my fingers. "Losers!" I yelled up to Nudge's bedroom, starting up the stairs. A second later, Sara came out, and shut the door behind her.

"I'd just like to prepare you," she said, grinning mischievously, "for the most gorgeous sight you've ever seen. Really." Oh, dear Lord.

"What, is Iggy lying on the floor dead?"

"Not quite."

"Then you don't need to prepare me for anything."

"Believe me," she giggled. "I do." She opened the door, and I braced myself for the worst... but nothing could've prepared me for the sight I was met with.

Iggy was stood in a corner of the room, in a bright yellow t-shirt and blue skirt, with scarlet stilettos, and the brown wig from earlier. He was murmuring little comments to himself that we could all hear, and he knew it: "Edward looks so gorgeous today. White, and he's all hard in places like-"

"IG," Ella yelled from the other side of the room, where she was stood in front of a true Fanglette. Typically, he wore the deepest scowl I'd ever seen, which didn't really match the rose-red dress, purple lipstick and white heels. Naturally, he was tied to a chair with multicoloured scarves.

"Sorry, Mum," Ig replied in a terrible British accent.

Nudge gave him a weird look. "And Bella is English since...?"

He shrugged. "Since I got in the moment." Apparently, he then realised he hadn't complimented his Edward in more than a sentence: "Oh, Edward, you are the only person in the world I will see, who the hell are these idiots in this room with us? I just want to rip your-"

"_Iggy!_" Ella couldn't hold back a giggle though, especially as he went on to mime what he'd apparently – indescribable, guys. It was Iggy, after all.

I strolled over to where Fanglette looked like he was about to kill himself, and bit back a smile. He looked up at me with big eyes. "Either kill me now, or untie me and let me kill them."

Solemnly, I looked him right into those boggy big eyes, and replied: "Red isn't your colour, dear."

He threw me a glare, before turning to Ella, Sara and Nudge, who were all stood looking at him and giggling in the corner of the room.

"I'm going to kill you, cremate you, and snort your ashes."

"Charming."

**[ x x x ]**

Hours later, when everyone was asleep – yeah, even Fangenstein – and we'd played and video'd every prank we could think of (which was a _lot_), me and Ig sat curled up under a blanket on Nudge's sofa.

He was replying to the ruder comments on his YouTube channel, snorting as he typed. Well, at least he thought he was funny.

Want an example? Look no further. The following was on a video where Ig made a pink Power Ranger and a plastic Edward Cullen discuss their feelings (the sad thing was that Iggy didn't even need to go out and buy them, they were readily available in his bedroom. Also note that the Power Ranger was pink).

**Max-is-the-hottest-thing-ever: **hand in the shot at 0:32 ha epic fail

**ig-needs-to-die-in-a-hole: **Dear Viewer,

the hand in the shot is due to the fact that they are FREAKING FIGURINES! And also, my unfortunate disability to GIVE A SHIT. I hope it did not ruin your enjoyment of the show, and your concerns will be sent to Iggy when he has returned from the 'Couldn't Care Less Islands' where he is enjoying an eternal.

Hoping you trip and break your nose,

Employee.

(Names may have been changed for privacy reasons... and my own amusement. Heh heh heh.) Well... at least he thought he was funny.

"Max," he looked up at me suddenly. "Okay, so let's pretend, hypothetically, that Edward Cullen's real." I started to roll my eyes, but he shook his head. Looked like this was going to be one of his rare serious moments. "No, but I mean like, you and this Edward Cullen are really close, okay? Like, really really close." I nodded slowly. "As in, you know what colour underwear he wears everyday, and won't let him wear Sunday socks on Tuesday." I rolled my eyes – I wouldn't let _anyone _do that. "And, um, say I really like this Edward Cullen, yeah?"

"Ig, where is this going?"

"Shh, let me finish. So, like, me and this Edward are pretty close, right? But he's always making fun of me, and being sarcastic, but in a nice way. Now, you and him are really really close, yeah? So, would you tell me to go for it with Edward, and, like, ask him out? Or would you want me to back the hell off?"

There was only one real answer to that. "Iggy, is this your way of telling me you're gay? I mean, we always _suspected_-"

"No!" He shoved me good-naturedly. "You're completely missing the point, as per usual." Um, like the master igiot had room to talk? "Yes or no?"

"Yeah, I guess," I nodded. "I mean, if me and this fairy dude are pretty close, would I know if the he-she liked you too?"

He completely ignored my question. "Alright, thanks."

I rolled my eyes, deciding not to press it further. "You're pretty serious for someone who was trying to hump Aiden earlier."

Ig grinned. "He's just so damn sexy, I can't help myself."

"Grow up."

"Growing up won't bring me down."

"Don't quote The Maine to me, you're not worthy."

"Sorry," he laughed. "But, really, today was all acting."

I raised an eyebrow. "Uh... why?"

"'Cause everyone was sad and stuff." Oh, how prophetic. Expect this guy up for a Nobel Peace Prize sometime soon. "I just wanted to make someone smile." We both said 'AWWWW' together obnoxiously, then cracked up.

"Hey, Ig?"

"Yeah?"

"I love you."

His eyes widened in mock shock. "Well, Max, as appreciative as I am of your, oh-so-heartfelt, confession, I'm going to have to decline."

I socked him one, rolling my eyes. "Please. In your dreams."

He grinned. "What _kind _of dreams? We-"

"Oh my God, Ig!" I punched him, pretty hard, in the stomach. "PG rating!"

He just laughed, and starting scrolling through the comments on his laptop again. I lay my head down on the side of the sofa, thinking that it was actually pretty nice to be just hanging with Ig alone.

Just as I felt my eyes start to drift closed, I heard Iggy speak again, and smiled: "Hey, Max? In a totally platonic, you're-the-only-person-I-can-trust-with-my-Edward-Cullen-analogies, I love you too."

**A/N: Okay, stow away the pitchforks 'till next time, you've had your Chapter 28! Apologies as always for the lateness, I hope you'll all respect the fact that, as a teenage girl, I do have a life. Not a very interesting one, granted, but I do leave the house. On rare occasions. 'Kay, gonna stop tearing myself down now. **

**Side note: Christofer Drew is even more gorgeous in person. Just sayin'.**

**So, as I'm going to Leeds Fest 2011 on the Saturday, I'mma just ask this question for kicks: Gerard Way or Jared Leto? **

**Thanks to you all for sticking with me, I know I'm a sodding, prat-ish blighter, but I do occasionally give you little bits of English terminology, so you have to love me anyways. Lessthanthree? ;DD**

**Revieweth? **


	29. Chapter 29

**Disclaimer: You should know this stuff by now.**

**A/N: Much love to reviewers of the last chapter, thank you very much. **

**It was my birthday a few weeks ago, and I asked Sean Smith from The Blackout to marry me – he said yes. ;DD If you search up any vids of them signing at a Pulp store, and see him wearing a gummy ring – that's mine. :') I'm ridiculously proud to be recognised as an idiot. Yeah, I met all of them at a signing, they're all lovely [no matter what you might've heard – they were genuinely really nice people, and the same can be said for Architects, who I met last week], and the gig was one of the very best I've ever been to. It was one of those birthdays that you know you'll still remember in twenty years time. (:**

**Here you go. (:**

As _everyone_ knows, I'm not really a morning person. At all. Not in the slightest.

So when I got on the plane at eight am, turned to Fangenstein, and asked him to sit next to me, I really wasn't expecting anything other than a yes.

"Nope," he replied, popping the 'p'.

"'Kay..." Wait, what just happened? "What?"

He rolled his eyes. It was depressing how awake he was. "No, Max, I won't sit with you."

"Why the hell not?"

"Because," he said, catching my chin with his index finger, and pulling my face right up to his, "that's what a boyfriend would do." He smiled, quite possibly at the fact that I'd forgotten to breathe, before stepping away to slide into a seat between Iggy and Nudge. The latter was fast asleep, and immediately leant her head on Fangenstein's shoulder. I sincerely hoped she'd drool.

Scowling, I shoved past Sara roughly so I was in the middle of her and Ella.

"Ditched," Ella grinned at me, and I resisted the overwhelming urge to slap her. Instead, I settled for peering over her shoulder at her phone. "Hey, piss off!" She held it up to her chest, effectively blocking my view, blushing.

Hm? Secrets? Kept by my little sister? Not on this watch.

"You," I grabbed her head, "will," pulled her into a headlock, "tell," twisted, "me," and back, "right," I let go of her. "Now."

"Um, ow?" Ella rubbed her neck, glaring.

Looking on, Sara laughed. "Someone woke up."

"And had an extra serving of bitchflakes!" Ella finished. Her phone buzzed just then, and she jumped, scrambling to grab it. She viewed the text, smiling like an idiot, then leaned over to show Sara, who rolled her eyes.

"You're an idiot," she said, sighing as Ella just shook her head happily and replied to the text. "Max. Tell her she's an idiot."

"She doesn't need to be told," I shrugged. "It's a given. She's Ella."

Ella was so engrossed in texting, she didn't even slap me. Okay, what the hell was wrong with the world? Fang was refusing to sit by me, and my little sister didn't even hit when I insulted her.

What is this, be nice to Max day? Unless you're Fang, in which case, be a prick as per usual.

"It's a boy, right?" I guessed. Sara nodded. "Thank God. I have nothing against lesbians, but really, Ella, I just don't think you have the figure for it."

She gasped. "What's the meant to mean?"

"...That I don't think you have the figure to be a lesbian?" I mean, duh.

She started to go into some rant about lesbian and gay rights (remind me to dare her to recite to Jane at some point), until her phone buzzed, and she went to read the text instantaneously. Dear God, she had it bad. I hardly ever texted – the freaking Queen could give me her number, and she'd still be the one texting first.

However, instead of reading it, and then sending one back, Ella typed her text back out, but didn't send it. I looked at her weirdly: "What on _earth_ are you doing?"

"Tell her, Ella," Nudge had woken up, and was now laughing at Ella. "Go on. Tell her how stupid you are."

Ella shot her a glare sharp as daggers, before turning to me, and saying, very quietly and quickly, "Well he usually leaves it two minutes so I don't want to seem too keen because I think he's pretty amazing and I really can't wait to see him again."

I disregarded the pretty amazing comment, and just looked at her. "So... you sit there, and wait two minutes, every time, before texting this guy back, just because he does too?"

"Three, if she can stop herself," Sara amended, giggling.

"Four, if she's _really _trying," Nudge chimed in. "He's called Gerard, he's like fifteen, and is spending Christmas in England with relatives."

"_Nudge_!" Ella swatted at her while Sara laughed.

"He's also gorgeous," Sara grinned. "According to Ella, anyway."

I learned one thing from that: "You can't have him."

"What? Why the hell not?" Ella was straight-away on my case. Damn, she'd fallen fast and hard.

"Because he is called Gerard, and my future husband is also called Gerard."

Ella raised her eyebrows. "I thought your future husband was called Fang, Kobrakid."

...Well.

Max Martinez just got owned by her little sister.

And Ig had it on camera, judging by the commentary from the seats behind.

..._Well._

"Kobrakid's not an insult," I replied snootily, trying to regain some dignity... that vanished as the male flight attendant tripped, and landed in my lap. He blushed and started stuttering apologies – as opposed to getting the hell off me. Naturally, no one thought to help; they just cracked up laughing. In the end, I just shoved him on the floor, not noticing the trolley behind, carrying food and drink, which then fell on it's side.

And all that food and drink?

You guessed it: directly on top of all of us. There was a chorus of 'Thanks, Max,' sarcastically, as Ella checked her phone desperately for damage, the attendants started firing apologies at us, half of the other first-class fliers turned their noses up at us, the other half laughed, and one or two offered us help.

To my surprise, it was Sir Talks-A-Lot who took control over the situation. He told the flight attendants it was fine, we just now needed access to the toilet one after the other to clean up – they nodded eagerly, and finally cleared off. He then stood up, and announced the following to everyone trying to help us: "It's fine. Thank you for the offer, but it's nothing unexpected, since we're travelling with Max Martinez."

Charming. He's so nice to me.

An hour or so later, when everything was under control and we were all dry and seated, I finally took in Ella and Sara's t-shirts.

"Hey," I pointed at them both. "When did you guys go see The Maine?"

Sara shrugged. "Two weeks ago, I think. It was _amazing_. Nudge couldn't come, though."

Both of them turned to glare at the girl in question, who raised her palms in surrender. "I was with the boyfriend!"

"NO ONE IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN JOHN O'CALLAGHAN," Ella yelled, entirely too loud for this plane.

"Shut up," I elbowed her. "You're an embarrassment."

"Let's ask the trolley lady who's more embarrassing," she suggested. "Or that attendant, Josh."

"...Never mind." She grinned in victory. "Whatever. I still don't remember you going to that gig."

She shrugged, and Sara said, "You were probably off flirting with Fang."

I just glared at her, letting the subject go, until a minute later, my phone buzzed.

_Fang_

**Tell Sara I resent the implication that I'd flirt with you.**

I turned, incredulously, to Fanglette, who was sat directly behind me. "Are you seriously _texting _me this?" He completely ignored me. "We could always talk like normal people."

"You're not normal," Sara pointed out, and I was somewhat inclined to agree. Fair enough. I had, after all, managed to tip a airline trolley over, and be molested by an attendant in the first twenty minutes of the flight. Well done Max.

So I gave in.

**Someone's been listening in English.**

_Fang_

**Someone's just naturally more intelligent than you.**

**Someone is most definitely 100% dead when a certain someone else rules the world.**

_Fang_

**Someone is going to have murdered Gerard Way by then, sending a certain someone else into a deep, inescapable depression. **

**Gerard Way's awesome acts as a shield, making him invincible.**

_Fang_

**Not to my assassins.**

**Your assassins are dead. Legolas caught them trying to cross the Me'ear Stream this morning.**

_Fang_

**...Excuse me. I must go investigate this claim.**

**It's true. HA.**

_Fang_

**It just got personal.**

**It wasn't already?**

_Fang_

**Shut up. I always wanted to say that.**

**Congratulations, you're a tit.**

_Fang_

**(:**

**Oh my God, even your smilies are retarded. Yours should look like this: (:\). Otherwise it's Mary-ist.**

_Fang_

**I hate you.**

**Nah. You don't. **

_Fang_

**/: Unfortunately true.**

**So come sit with me.**

_Fang_

**Nope. **

**You're so freaking frustrating.**

_Fang_

**(: That's the aim.**

**I hereby end this conversation.**

_Fang_

**Fine.**

Annoyed, I shove my phone in my pocket, and start taking out my anger on Ella, with relentless questioning.

"Where did you meet him?"

"At the The Maine gig."

"Is he tall?"

"Taller than me."

"Is he nice?"

"He's lovely."

"What does he do?"

"What do you think he does, you tit? He goes to school."

"Where does he live?"

"Forty minutes on the bus."

"Yeah, but where?"

"Well I don't know! I'd look like an absolute stalker."

"Does he know your sister is going to rule the world, and therefore can destroy him with a single look?"

"Um, no."

"Why the hell not?"

"Because he'd think I'm absolutely insane?"

"And why does he not know that already?"

"Oh, he does."

"...Why does he still want to know you then?"

"Oh my God, _Max," _Ella finally gave in. "Leave me alone!"

"Oh, so now you're getting defensive."

"You're acting absolutely ridiculous. Go flirt with Fang."

I gasped. "Me and Fang do not _flirt. _We have intellectual conversations."

"About?"

"World leadership!"

"Okay then," she shrugged. "Go have an intellectual conversation about world leadership with Fang."

I considered it... for a millisecond. "No, that requires effort."

"Go snog him then."

"Grow up."

"Growing up won't bring me down."

"You just quoted Iggy."

"...I'm washing my mouth out with acid."

And that, right there, is the main reason why I don't disown my little sister. She might do the stupidest things ever half the time, but she does come out with some sense to redeem herself. Every now and again. Once every few months, maybe. Every year. Every other five years – that sounds about right.

**[ x x x ]**

When we finally stumbled out of the plane, it was already eight pm in England. And, naturally, raining. All snowy and rainy and icy and... English. I was half-expecting someone to run up to us and offer us all a cup of tea in a crisp British accent.

Unfortunately, they didn't, but Iggy did say hello and goodbye to absolutely every person we passed. Whilst filming, naturally. So, of course, I shoved him onto the baggage carousel, which was going around at approximately three miles per hour. Being Ig, however, he couldn't get off, and we had to run to grab him and yank him off, before he got stuck (which he totally deserved).

It only got worse from then on – turned out Mum was stuck in London traffic, and wasn't going to be there for at least another hour, and we were just stuck in the Gatwick airport. With Iggy. Which would've been bad enough, except he was calling us all his slaves and trying to order us to carry him around to make up for his 'traumatic experience', very, _very, _loudly.

"Slave McEmo Pants, go buy me a palm tree. Slave MassiveMouth, go get me a small ginger. Slave Text-A-Lot, get me some brown hair dye. Slave Blondie, shampoo and conditioner. Slave Mrs McEmo Bossy Pants, I feel like some coffee, go get me a grande cappuccino from Starbucks." We all just looked at him, eyebrows raised and arms folded, as he stared at us expectantly.

You see what we have to deal with?

"It's like a crime not to get tea in this country," I said with a shrug, going to sit on the plush seat.

Ella was, stupidly, curious. "Why a ginger kid and hair stuff?"

"Community service," he replied with a grin. He's such a ginger-ist. I do apologise – I think gingers are awesome, and so have frequently tried to dye Ella's hair strawberry-blonde. She protested. There was violence.

Rolling their eyes, Ella, Nudge and Sara all came to join me, and Iggy turned to Fangenstein hopefully.

"No." And so Fangspeare strikes again. We all just sat there, staring at him staring at us.

Then, horrifically, he started to dance.

There aren't words. There are not words. Not even in the Maxtionary (now $49.99 in your non-local retailer, if you were wondering).

People began to stare, and I made to get up, but Fanglette stopped me. "No one should have to get closer than necessary to _that._" Then, with a sigh, he heaved himself up, and strode over to Ig, who had his arms out, head down, and was stomping repeatedly. Poor thing. I mean, what had the floor ever done to deserve that?

"What the _hell _are you doing?"

Ig looked up at him with big, blue eyes. "...Expressing my emotions in expressive dance."

**[ x x x ]**

Two and a half hours later, we were all trudging up the hotel stairs – I never stairs could be posh until then. They had this really pretty pattern running up alongside them, on the wall, and the carpeting was- okay. Just stop there, Max, and you see that gun? Pick it up, and please, for the love of God, shoot yourself.

Ella, Nudge and Sara all went running to secure the best room for us, while me, Mum, Fang and Iggy followed at a more respectable pace. The respect we might've gained through that, however, was ruined by Iggy singing 'Just The Way You Are'... to the receptionist... before stopping, looking closer at her, and saying, 'Sorry to mention it... but how many times do you think about dying your hair on a daily basis?' Ginger-ist _prat. _

Of course, while Mum was all for the 'drown-in-apologies' approach, I slapped him around the face: "We all hate you. Go upstairs and drown yourself. Preferably in your own tears." And, although I got a reproving look from mother dear, the receptionist laughed her little ginger head off, and told me I was the highlight of her day...

...Leading me to ruin it by turning to Ella, and saying, "If this doesn't make me the favoured child, I don't know what will."

Needless to say, Mum all but _shoved _us up the stairs. Domestic violence, I'm sure of it.

"Max!" Ella poked her head out of one of the doors at the top of the staircase, and motioned wildly for me to come in. I obliged, noting Ig's slightly stormy expression, and making a mental note to text him about it in a moment. What? Talking would require effort. Ew, effort.

Inside, there were three double beds, and a single one that flipped down from the wall – but, most interestingly to me, there was also a massive mini-fridge. Coincidentally, I had a massive stomach, that, also coincidentally, needed filling. So while Sara and Nudge grabbed a double bed each, started jumping on them and throwing pillows at one another, I gorged myself on cheese and onion crips and Diet Coke.

Don't worry – I'd already thrown my suitcase on the remaining double bed. Gotta show some authority over the little sister.

"This place is _amazing,_" Nudge enthused, squealing as she dodged a craftily-thrown pillow from Ella.

"Yeah," Sara agreed, with an enthusiastic nod, "your mum's so nice. Can I has her?"

Me and Ella exchanged a look, before replying simultaneously: "Sure."

"Speak for yourselves," Nudge said, flopping down lazily on the bed. "I'll fight you for her, Sart!"

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Ella pull her phone out of her pocket – reminding me that I needed to text Ig.

So I did. As you do.

**Oy, what's up with you?**

He replied straight away, proving that he really did have no life:

_Iggy_

**Go away, my cheek hurts.**

**Wow, you really are gay.**

_Iggy_

**Mind OUT of the gutter, Maxie.**

**Can't help it, you _are _the master at that, after all. **

_Iggy_

**I know, right? ;D What did you mean before, though?**

**You just didn't seem like you. I was expecting you to try to slide _up _the bannister, or something equally twat-ish.**

_Iggy_

**DAMN WHY DID I NOT THINK OF THAT?**

**Um, exactly. What's up?**

_Iggy_

**Vamp problems.**

**You mean girl troubles?**

_Iggy_

**No, I mean I think Edward's on his time of the month.**

**...You think the girl you like is on her period? Dear God, that's seriously creepy. Even for you. This is a whole new _level _of creepiness.**

_Iggy_

**No, like, in New Moon, Edward went off to flirt with other fit tramp vamps, right?**

**Tramp vamps. Well done, did it take you long to come up with that one? And no, but go on.**

_Iggy_

**Been saving it for this occasion, actually. And, well there you go then. I think it's a New Moon tonight, and Edward's picked up on that, if you know what I mean. **

**Does anyone ever?**

_Iggy_

**#:O) We're gonna knock for you tramp vamps in a sec, we're gonna go down for tea, or dinner as those posh Brits call it. Prepare yourself for an invasion of manliness.**

**Unless you've miraculously transformed into Orlando Bloom and Jared Leto, there's no preparation needed.**

_Iggy_

**Love you too. **

**Oh, I know.**

**A/N: Dunno what I thought about that, bit in the middle. Meh. I hope YOU liked it though, 'cos your opinion matters more to me than my own. 'Cos I love youuuuu guyssssss. 'Kay, Disney moment disregarded, your thoughts are always appreciated, bad or good. **

**Question: what's your Summer song? I'm talking upbeat, happy. Mine's either La La Love by Taylor Thrash, Can't Stand It by NeverShoutNever!, or What You Do To Me by We The Kings. **

**'Kay, thanks for reading, lessthanthree you guys! [Montana - (;]**

Revieweth?


	30. Chapter 30

**Disclaimer: **I don't own MR, or any of the songs mentioned in this chapter.

**A/N: **Thank you for the reviews, and all the 'happy birthday's. Still astounds me. 100K and 700 reviews, bloody mental.(:

Okay, guys, this chapter's just a little bit different. Please, go listen to Daydreams by Breanne Duren. It'll just help you visualise this whole thing, I think. Plus, it's amazing, and this girl deserves all the fans in the world – her new EP was just released on iTunes, it's not available in the UK (*cries in a corner*), but all you lovely Americans can go download it right now.

Or after reading this chapter.

But go YouTube one of those songs now.

Got it? Okay, good. **Let's go~**

"Hey," I felt a pillow land lightly on my head, shaking me from sleep. "Get up."

I groaned, sleep still blurring my eyes as I looked at the dark figure leaning nonchalantly against the wall. "No."

He chuckled – it had to be Fang: who else? -and strolled over to my bed, leaning right down until my thoughts stopped coming, and I had to focus entirely on breathing normally.

"Max," he whispered softly, his warm breath smelling like coffee and mint. "Come on."

And because I'm a soppy idiot who has absolutely no self-respect, feminism, or any other redeeming features, I did. I was quite aware that I was indeed turning into the dreaded tablecloth – aka Bella Swan – but at the same time... I did get to spend some time with Fang. Which was quite nice.

I shut the door quietly behind us, as not to wake Ella, Nudge, or Sara (Mum had a room to herself), and set off slowly down the stairs to where Fang was waiting by the doors, which he pulled open with a mocking flourish as I drew near. I rolled my eyes, pulling my hoodie tighter around me as there was a gust of cold air.

"What _time _is it?" I said, my teeth beginning to chatter, finally waking up. It was freaking _freezing_!

"Uh..." Fang pulled his phone from his pocket. "6:30am."

I gaped at him for a second, before coming to my senses, and turning around to stomp back up to my room... unfortunately, Fang grabbed my hand, preventing me from waking up absolutely everyone in the hotel, and quite possibly breaking the floor in the process.

"I have coffee," he said, holding out the hand he'd been hiding behind his back to reveal a large Starbucks espresso. "I got it from a store last night, after tea."

"How much?" I asked, already digging into my pocket for my purse with my free hand, but he shook his head, that deadly half-smile forming on his face.

"A walk around London," he replied.

I was painfully aware of the fact that he hadn't yet let go of my hand, and that we were both wearing fingerless gloves, making my fingers super sensitive to where his brushed mine. Which, obviously, was everywhere.

Goddamnit, Max, _snap of it._

Thing is, for some reason, I kind of didn't want to. I know, I know: who the hell did those thoughts belong to, because it sure as hell wasn't Maximum Martinez. Except it blatantly was.

Reeling in shock from this (I definitely wouldn't have done the following otherwise... right?), I sighed, and started to walk, pulling Fang long. "What are you waiting around the cold for then? And is that coffee an accessory or something, or can I drink it already?"

He laughed, handing me the coffee as he matched my pace, disturbingly awake for such a disgustingly early hour, and I told him so. Irritably, I suppose some people would say. Those 'some people' will be beheaded when I rule the world.

"Is that a continuation of truths?" he asked, rather happily for someone holding hands with a Max Martinez earlier than 10am. I nodded, and he hummed for a moment, before continuing. "Before I moved here, and I was dating Rachel – you remember, right?" As if I could forget. He waited for my nod, before venturing on: "We lived right next to the beach, so I used to climb up this like pipe thing, and help her out of her window at like... 4am. We'd just go walking on this beach, all morning. Then we'd go back, and make sure she got in before her parents noticed she was missing."

...I didn't know what to say, but it didn't really matter, because Fang wasn't paying any attention to me, anyway. He was lost in a memory.

**[3rdP POV]**

_The teenager stole across the garden, threading his way to the pipe running up the side of the house with ease, despite the pitch-black darkness: he knew this house as well as his own. Stealing a deep breath, he placed his hands either side of the pipe, and began to scale it swiftly. _

_He stopped outside of a open window – the curtains were blowing out, and Fang smirked. It was so cheesy, like some music video for a We The Kings song, or a romantic comedy film. Maybe this was all being filmed, and he was about to fall off into a vat of custard. But he didn't dwell on these thoughts for too long. He knew she was waiting. _

_It was impossible to enter a room through a window gracefully, and Fang proved no exception to this rule, despite his experience, tumbling in to land heavily on the floor. _

_Rachel Peace rushed to his side, dressed in jeans and a t-shirt, already helping him up with her small, cold hands. "Are you okay?" _

"_Fine," Fang replied – he was used to falling through. He brushed his hair out of his face, and wrapped his arms around his girlfriend, who in turn pulled him closer, smiling up at him. _

_She was gorgeous, even if she didn't see it herself, with her long, mahogany curls and big amber eyes – they really were almost yellow, but they had a mystical gold tint. Maybe it was just Fang who saw that, though – the spark whenever she looked at him. Skinny, but not too skinny, and tall, but not a giant. Everyone was always telling her to go to modelling agencies – even Fang himself, at one point – but Rachel was just as sweet as she was pretty. She didn't want to become some airbrushed size zero that little girls aspired to be. _

_Rachel wanted to be a singer. But no one had ever heard her sing, because she was shy, and she didn't even think she was good enough. No one knew she wanted to be a singer. It was just a hidden hope she'd always had. Not even Fang knew. _

_And, at that moment, the very last thing on her mind was confessing this particular wish of hers. In fact, the only thing on her mind right then was the fact that Fang was curling his hands around hers, pulling back slightly and looking into her eyes. _

"_You okay?" he asked._

_She shook her head slightly, returning to the – rather wonderful – moment at hand. "Oh, yeah, I'm fine!" She blushed. "Let's go?" _

"_One thing," Fang said, blocking the way even though she hadn't even loosened her grip on his hands. She looked up at him, surprise shining in her eyes, and Fang couldn't help but smile. A full, real smile from ear-to-ear. "I love you."_

_There was a weird flutter in Rachel's chest, one that Fang always seemed to spark, and one that she didn't really have any generally negative feelings towards. A smile unconsciously lit up her face, and Fang's heart started practicing for the 2012 USA acrobatics team alongside hers. "I love you, too." _

_And with that, they clambered out of the window, Fang helping her down, to enjoy a few snatched hours of walking barefoot down the beach, kissing, talking, feeling the waves flow through their toes, and just being Fang Ride and Rachel Peace. They didn't have long, but that didn't matter. Any time was enough._

_And when it was over, when he was helping her back through the window, he brushed the sand from her feet before jumping down, knowing he'd see her again in a few long hours. "'Night, Rach."_

"_I love you," she called back down in way of goodbye._

"_You too," Fang replied. "I love you."_

**[Max POV]**

Okay, that was long enough.

I elbowed him in the stomach: "Oy, Fangenstein. Looking like a zombie for any reason in particular?"

He blinked several times, finally snapping out of whatever stupor he'd been in for the past ten minutes. "Oh. Hey."

Rolling my eyes, I decided to ignore his weirdness, and just get on with life. So I threw the coffee cup at him; unfortunately, he caught it with ease. That fact, however, didn't stop him looking at me like I was certifiably insane (technically, it's not certified).

Sure enough: "What was that for?"

"You're the bin," I informed him with a smile. I allowed him a moment for this to sink in, before taking off, running as fast as I could.

Which, naturally, was a hell of a lot faster than Fang could _ever _run. But then again, that's just to be expected: I'm naturally better than Fanglette in every way.

Unfortunately, I was also a hello of a lot _clumsier _than Fangtard... leading me to catch my foot on a crack in the pavement, and have a brief spell at flying, before my wings somewhat dissipated, and I smashed into the ground, headfirst.

Bloody England and their concrete ground.

To my surprise, instead of laughing, Fang was immediately on his knees beside, his hands cupping my face and tilting it upwards, towards him. "Are you okay?"

I did a quick check – eyes were open, mouth was closed, and I could only _taste _blood, as opposed to feeling it dripping of my chin, so... "'S'all good."

Unsteadily, I clambered to my knees, cursing at the fact that I was now soaked. Again. Well done, Max. Fang, seeing I was shivering, pulled his own Mayday Parade hoodie off and pulled it over my head, desite my 'No, you smell funny' and 'I don't _want_ your ugly germs' protests.

A few minutes of sulking later (he pointed out that I hadn't taken it off, and I couldn't come up with a suitably cutting reply, so I just stormed along), I was actually grateful for his hoodie: it had started snowing, thick and fast. I glanced up at Fanglette, wondering if he was having the same thought as I was... before remembering my thoughts were far too awesome for any mortal.

Surreptitiously, I scooped up a handful of snow from the next postbox, or bin, whatever, we passed, and shaped it into a ball. Then I chucked it at his head. As you do.

He gasped as it hit him square in the face, but, instead of throwing anything back, he grasped my arms in his ice-cold hands, and pulled me towards him. I could feel his warm breath against my icy cheeks, and had an odd urge to pull back... and an even odder, larger urge to lean forwards.

Ew, Max.

"That wasn't fair," he whispered.

I gulped, searching for something insulting and coming up blank. "Um." Typically smooth and brilliant as ever. Well done.

"Not something you'd expect from a potential world leader," he continued, the corners of his mouth lifting up just a little.

Shit. No. Brain, hello? Please. Hawaii ain't got nothing on England... No? Okay. Thanks for the support. I really appreciate it.

"Um."

"You know," he mused aloud. "I wonder what would happen if we ever worked together. King and Queen of the world."

I was hit by a memory from just weeks before:

'_Long live the walls we crashed through  
All the kingdom lights shined just for me and you  
I was screaming, "long live all the magic we made"  
And bring on all the pretenders  
One day we will be remembered._

_You know, if Fang and I ever, you know, formed an alliance, this could be our song. Except we don't like each other in that way. It'd be in a friendship kind of way, of course._'

Oh, God.

"Um."

And now he was smiling and leaning down even more and I couldn't really breathe and everything was going a bit mental and his lips were so close and the butterflies were ripping out of my stomach and I didn't know what I wanted the only thing I knew right then was that if I kissed him now everything would change but I still wasn't going to stop it and...

"Oy! Max! It's like 2pm, get the hell up!"

...Then I opened my eyes.

Holy shit.

I just... did I really just? Oh my God. I did, didn't I?

**[ x x x ]**

Fang rolled over, rubbing his eyes as he slowly came to. His vision was blurred, his mind full of the dream he'd just awoken from: it wasn't the first time he'd dreamt about Max – far from it – but... it had just seemed so real. Like she was actually going to... Ugh.

He shook his head, hoping to just forget it, but... what the hell was the whole thing with Rachel about, anyway? He'd thought he was totally over her. That the pain he used to get when thinking about her, and how he'd left her behind, was gone. He'd _known_ he was totally over her – he would never have even considered pursuing Maximum Martinez, of all people, if hadn't known that for absolute sure.

Hell, he never thought he'd consider pursuing Maximum Martinez, full stop. That dream had just been... weird.

**[ x x x ]**

I mean, why would that even happen? Fang was... a best-friend-with-potential, and I didn't want that to change any time soon... right?

God, Martinez. Are you asking yourself, or are you telling yourself?

You're telling yourself.

Get over this shit. So you had a dream about him. What's the big deal? You woke up in the end.

**[ x x x ]**

No, he knew he was over Rachel: the fact that she'd featured in his dream was just a coincidence. Besides... it had made him realise something.

He didn't want a girl who rushed to help him when he fell through a window; quoted poetry to him; was heavily favoured for prom queen and couldn't be seen without her make-up.

He wanted a girl who'd crack up laughing and mock him about it for the rest of his life; protested like mad when he tried to just give her his hoodie; wouldn't wear a dress of her own accord if her life depended on it and couldn't walk more than a step in anything higher than Converse without tripping.

Oh, God. He was going mental.

Max Martinez would never go out with him – not in less than several years, anyway.

But, for all his 'persuasion' threats, he just couldn't get her out of his damn head.

**[ x x x ]**

Rachel Peace woke up, for lack of a better word, peacefully. She just drifted from the dream she'd been having... which was rather lovely, actually.

She'd been reminiscing, in her sleep, about the times when she woke not quite so gently, when her world seemed to revolve around a guy with a fringe longer than his face.

Though she was loathe to admit it, and was more than happy with her life at the moment, she _missed _him. She missed the way she could make a massive smile appear on his face with just those a few words; she missed the way he'd brush the sand from her feet; she missed the way his hand felt in hers; she missed the way he gently tilted her face up so he could kiss her oh-so-softly, and she _missed _the way he loved her.

They emailed, they texted, they called... but it just wasn't the same. She knew that he was happier there than he'd ever been with her: he had all those new friends, the ones that were always writing on his wall on Facebook – that Max Martinez girl, and Lissa whatever-her-name-was. Not that she stalked him, or anything. Not intentionally, at least. Really, she didn't. His profile just seemed to pop up. Honest.

He was over her – totally, totally over her.

But...

She just couldn't let go.

**[ x x x ]**

_The problem?_

**[ x x x ]**

_The problem?_

**[ x x x ]**

_The problem?_

**[ x x x ]**

_Maybe I didn't want to._

**A/N: **The last part is all three of them thinking, if you were confused.

I know – it's been less than a month, it's a miracle. I apologise for not replying to reviews/any outstanding private messages [that's directed at you, Cari, sorry, I love you, don't hate meD:]/betas waiting [sorry, percabethatw. I'm a shit], life's just been getting in the way of... well, life. You know what it's like: EXAMS = IMPENDING DOOM.

Anyway. **Question**: what song makes you happy? Just puts this massive smile on your face. Gotta say, for me, it's probably _A Little More Us _by _Stereo Skyline, Still Breathing _by _Mayday Parade, _or _Heaven Can Wait _by _We The Kings.(: _Recommend all three highly.

Thank you, guys. You make me happy, forsure.(:

Revieweth?


	31. Chapter 31

**Disclaimer: **Copyright JP.

**A/N: **Hey hi hello, I'm so sorry it's been so long:( Not gonna bore you with reasons – very shortly, gigs. Met We Are The In Crowd [yes. Tay Jardine], A Rocket to the Moon, Mayday Parade, We Are The Ocean, Francesqa, Framing Hanley, and My Passion. Met all of them, and saw a lot more [including The Blackout for the 5th time, and Young Guns for the 3rd. You haven't lived if you haven't seen them, seriously].

That's _basically _why it's so late.

There's a lot of fluff at the end to make up for it.;)

Love you all, thank you so much for the reviews, feel free to pm me or hit me up on tumblr [just ask for it~~] :)****

Here goes~

**?: **Hi, Eleni. It's Matt.

**Eleni: **_I know._

**Matt: **What? Are you psychic?

**Eleni: **_No. You put your name in my phone._

**Matt: **Oh, right, God, of course! Man, I'm thick.

**Eleni: **_Evidently._

**Matt: **So, uh, how are you?

**Eleni: **_Good, thanks. You?_

**Matt: **Okay, cheers. How's things?

**Eleni:**_Things are... normal?_

**Matt: **Heh, probably a good thing. So, what are you doing next Friday?

**Eleni: **_Things._

**Matt: **Things that could prevent you from getting coffee with me?

**Eleni: **_Possibly._

**Matt: **Possibly...?

**Eleni: **_Possibly not._

**Matt: **...Okay? I'm kind of confused, heh. :)  
**Eleni: **_I'll get back to you._

**X**

"Are you all planning on going out?" Mum asked as we swigged down fresh orange juice and scoffed stacks of pancakes drizzled with chocolate sauce. Everyone mm'd in place of answering, and she rolled her eyes. "I'm looking for at least a five word answer."

I swallowed a lump of pancake. "Yeah, but we haven't planned anything."

"Plan now," she replied, "I want to know what everyone's doing before I dare release you on England."

Oh, charming. The amount of respect and love my own mother has for me is just so overwhelming.

"Fine," I shrugged, glancing at Fang, who just shrugged – helpful. "Who wants to do what?"

Sara looked at me like I was clinically insane. "Me and Nudge are going shopping. What else?"

"Well, I do apologise for not knowing every aspect of your daily life," I said sarcastically, turning to Iggy. "You?"

"I got tickets to some musical thing," he shrugged aimlessly. "I guess I'm going to see that."

"What musical?" Ella asked absent-mindedly, texting as per usual.

"Blood Brothers, or something," Ig replied, slicing a pancake. He was acting odd, not loud, bouncy and stupid as usual.

Ella turned to him, phone forgotten, eyes lit up. "I _love _that musical! It's so sad, but beautiful, and..." she sighed, evidently at a loss for words (something that I wish would happen more often with my little sister).

"Come with me then?" Ig asked, like it was obvious. Ella nodded eagerly. "I only have two tickets, so the rest of you can fuck off."

"James Griffiths, watch your language," Mum fixed her with her death glare, and Iggy immediately held his hands up in surrender, apologising. See where I get my terrifying Max-ness from? Exactly. It runs in the family.

"What are we doing?" Fang asked, quietly enough that only I could hear it.

I shrugged. "London eye?"

He swallowed, hesitating for a moment, before nodding.

"So you're all in pairs, right? And you'll keep your phones on at all times?" Mum went through everything again. "I want to know where you are at all times, and if anything happens-" she narrowed her eyes, looking at each of us in turn- "I want to know about it. Immediately. Okay?"

I gulped. The only person I was afraid of in the world? Besides Ke$ha without make-up?

"Yes, Mum."

My mother.

**[ x x x ]**

**Welcome to Fang's blog.**

Hits: 524

_Yo._

I don't really know what I'm doing. But a lot of Iggy's YouTube people have been bugging me to do this forever, so, uh, hi. I'm Fang. I like to eat and sleep.

_But when I sleep, I have weird dreams. Good, but... weird. I dreamed about a date last night. A good date._

_Wow. I'm talking about dreams. I _really _don't know what I'm doing._

_Insert cool catchphrase goodbye here,_

_Fang._

**[ x x x ]**

"Do you think they'd take pink sparkly handcuffs as a legit Christmas present or a reason to kill me?" Sara mused aloud, giggling a little.

Nudge shot her a side look, flicking through a rack of reduced vintage dresses. "Max takes anything as a reason to kill everyone, let's be honest here. I love her, but she _is _Max."

"I love Max," Sara replied. "And I'd buy them the 'cuffs, but I don't think there's anywhere we could get them from."

"That's a _good _thing," Nudge laughed, removing a dress from the rack and holding it up against Sara. "Go try this on, if it looks good, it's your Christmas present."

"Classy, you," Sara rolled her eyes, nevertheless grabbing the dress, as it was, admittedly, gorgeous. All bits of fabric with different patterns sown together.

They spent the next few hours finding suitable Christmas presents for everyone, including each other, laughing at all the little British things they saw and taking pictures, before heading to a nearby Starbucks for some much-needed caffeine. Well, much-needed in Sara's case, at least; Nudge was positively dancing along the wet, crowded streets, much to the other blonde's embarrassment.

"So do you like anyone?" was the first question Nudge asked, much to Sara's amusement.

"Nope," she replied. "Forever alone. I'm like a unicorn around here."

Nudge laughed. "You'll find someone! Someone with dark hair, and brown eyes like melted chocolate and-"

"Nudge." Sara interrupted her before she got too carried away.

"Spill on Gerard then," Nudge finally asked; she'd been wanting to for ages now, but Ella was already around, and Sara was the most reliable person to report back. "I want all the details. Including what he smells like, and whether or not he knows who Gok Wan is. Oh, and if he li-"

"Nudge, shut up, and maybe I'll tell you," Sara interrupted, cold hands cupped around her coffee mug. Nudge huffed, gesturing for Sara to go on. "Well. He didn't really talk to me at all, but he seemed quite nice. He was really bouncy and kinda clumsy if you know what I mean?"

Nudge looked at her seriously. "Not the Iggy kind of clumsy?"

Sara shook her head, clearly terrified at the idea. "No, no, this was a cute and endearing kind of clumsy. Iggy's just thick and annoying."

"Well, Ella's on a date with him, so she obviously doesn't think so." Nudge shrugged.

"I don't think it's a _date_," Sara replied, rolling her eyes at her best friend's tendency to get carried away. "They're just hanging out."

"At a theatre. Where the lights are dim, and the orchestral music's totally romantic, and they can only afford one tub of ice-cream at the interval, and he feeds her, and she smiles, and they-"

Sara sighed loudly, trying not to laugh. "No, it's Iggy and Ella, let's be realistic. She'll be annoyed at herself for not bringing enough money – which will so _not _be the case anyway – and when Iggy brings back their shared tub, he'll steal the wooden spoon, and she'll hit him."

"True love," Nudge winked. "But, really, don't you think something could be going on there?"

"No."

"But it could!"

"No, it couldn't."

"It is, and I think we should document it." Nudge folded her arms, in the worldwide signal of 'Be quiet, your opinion is invalid, and what I say _will_ happen'. In Nudgetopia, anyway.

"Nudge. It's not happening."

"Shut up," she waved a hand as if the other girl was boring her. "How should we document it? Should we do it like the diary of Iggy and Ella for their children? Or like a video thing? They could even have a TV show."

"But it's not happening, so there's no point?" 

Nudge sighed, and leaned over the table she was closer to Sara than she would've liked. Sara squirmed, trying not to smile, but Nudge kept her poker face completely intact. "Ella Martinez is currently out at the theatre, with _Iggy. _Even better, the musical doesn't even start until like eight pm, so they'll have to amuse each other for the entire day. Ella has WILLINGLY agreed to do that with IGGY. The whole DAY, and half the night. IGGY. JAMES GRIFFITHS, who dresses up as Bella Swann, blew up his step-brother's mattress, and doesn't know the difference between seven and twelve."

"And Ella still agreed to go out with him..." Sara finally began to see where Nudge was coming from.

"Exactly," Nudge snapped her fingers, sitting back. "So we document it. Just so they can know that we are forever right, and anything wrong we might get in the future is totally irrelevant because we were so right this one time. But how?"

Sara considered for a moment, deciding to forget how insane and ridiculous the whole idea was. "Okay. You video it all. I'll make a scrapbook diary-type thing, but we can't show each other them until we've decided it's time to give it to them."

Nudge nodded emphatically, clasping her hands to her chest dramatically. "It's going to be so romantic and beautiful!"

"Speaking of romantic, when did you and the boyfriend break up and why?" Strangely for Nudge, she'd only mentioned the break-up a couple of times, and Sara knew Ella only knew what she did.

Nudge shrugged, clearly uncomfortable. "A couple of weeks ago, it was a mutual decision. But what should we call the project?"

Sara ignored the fact that she'd changed the subject so quickly. "Iggy... Ella... Iggy and Ella... Iella... Eggy."

"PROJECT SCRAMBLED EGGS."

Sara cracked up laughing, finally unable to hold it, reaching across to slap Nudge. "That is disgusting!"

"Mind _out _of the gutter," Nudge giggled, winking suggestively.

Rolling her eyes,Sara pulled her phone out of her pocket, texting a few words to someone before turning to her best friend, considering the project name once again. It was a very serious matter, after all. She thought for a moment, factoring in Fang and Max, and anyone else who needed to hurry the hell up and get together. "Project English Breakfast is a go."

**[ x x x ]**

"Do we, uh, have to go on?" Fang looked at the oversized ferris wheel we were waiting to go on. The queue was ridiculous.

"We _did _come here to go on it," I replied, rolling my eyes but not looking at him. "We've been waiting for an hour already!"

"Yeah," he replied quietly, even quieter than the normal for Fangspeare.

We waited in silence for a while, listening to all the excited tourists around us, and the locals that were clearly highly amused by their excitement. We lay somewhere in the middle, the inbetweeners.

It was only when I shivered that Fang spoke again. "Are you cold?"

"I'm fne," I said, gesturing to just the few people in front of us. "We're about to get on anyway."

"Yeah," Fang said, "but are you cold?"

"No, I'm just shivering for the fun of it," I replied.

Fang nodded: "I'll go get you some coffee."

"No, you won't," I replied, "we're about to get on! What's wrong with you?"

He swallowed audibly. All of this was seriously out of character for Fang.

Finally: "Is that a continuation of truths?"

"If you'll answer truthfully, yes."

He sighed, closing eyes for a minute, before stepping much closer to me, and pressing his lips to my ear. I thanked God it was so cold then, just so I'd have an excuse for the tremors flowing through my body.

"I'm scared of heights," he whispered, his breath hot against my neck, before pulling away and running a hand through Mary.

If it had been anyone else, I'd probably have laughed. Instead, I rolled my eyes internally, and wrapped him in a hug externally.

I looked up at him with a smile – he was clearly surprised I'd hugged him in front of all these people. God forbid people actually thought we were together. "It'll be fine. I promise."

"Maximum Ride has a heart?" He shot me that smile that made the butterflies go rabid, and I punched him in the arm.

_Yeah, _I thought, _and it's all yours. _

**[ x x x ]**

He didn't know what the hell he was doing half the time, when Max was around. He knew he didn't show it, but he was secretly scared of the girl finding out just what she did to him.

When he kissed her, it was like all the stars in the night sky were exploding. He felt like brightness, like they were going to blow the world up with the electricity between them. He was the ocean, she was the boat. He was the traveller, she was the journey. He was the pudding, she was the chocolate. He was the spoon, she was the fork.

They belonged together, she made everything about him better, and he knew it. He just wished she'd realise it already.

The whole persuasion thing was a total bluff, and after he'd thought about it, he'd realised how to do it – just act like her friend. Nothing extra. Totally back off.

But when she was wrapping her arms around him and smiling up at him, promising him it was all going to be okay... he'd never realised it could be so hard to be _just friends._

**[ x x x ]**

The ascent was surprisingly slow and gentle, and Fang and I had somehow managed to get a pod all to ourselves. I think it was because the woman attendant had been almost as transfixed by Gentlefang's smile as much as me. Almost. Inside, it was silent, despite the general clatter of the street, and there were two bench-like sofa's attached to either side. It was all white, and glass, very modern.

At least until all the ice Fang and I had collected over the day started to melt.

We didn't really notice, though. Or, rather, we did, and made a mutual decision not to give a shit.

There was plenty of room on the sofa, but we sat pressed up close against each other. I think Fang needed the support as much as I enjoyed being close to him.

See, it's the little things like that that I think about that make me wonder why I haven't given up and gone out with him yet.

I... I was going to say I couldn't. But then I realised... I couldn't think of a reason why not.

I think Maximum Ride... I think I'm giving up.

Just as I realised this, Fang's hand found mine, and I looked up. Seeing we were rising, I tightened my hand around his, and he shot me a slight smile.

"Hey," I said softly, "we're here. It's okay."

"I know," he said.

"It's just us."

"I know."

"It's kind of like our own little bubble."

"I know."

"It doesn't even go that high."

He just threw me a look.

"I claim the Doctor."

Glaring, he turned to me. "That is totally not fair. I was distracted."

I shrugged. "You win some, you lose some. In this case, you lost."

He folded his arms – shit was getting serious. "I claim Rose."

"Daleks."

"The Tardis."

"The red UK phoneboxes." I looked at him bemusedly, and he shrugged. "I'll get the Hulk to throw them at you."

The fairy spies that had been resting on my shoulders quickly noted this tactic down.

"The Queen is mine."

"I want her butler."

"The creator of Oreos."

"The-" He stopped when he saw how high we were getting. We were nearly at the top. He took a deep breath in, then out, then closed his eyes.

"Come on," I said, squeezing his hand, which was in an iron grip around mine. "We're going down in a moment."

"It's a long way down," Fang whispered.

"Give it a chance," I leaned my head on his shoulder. "If you close your eyes, I'll close mine."

He didn't respond, so I did, and for those few seconds it was calm, and all I could feel, hear, and smell was Fang.

I couldn't hold back from opening them a minute later, though. To my surprise, they locked with Fang's. He'd been watching me, and he smiled when I opened them.

I gasped as I looked out. "It's so... beautiful."

"Yeah," Fang replied, a little shaky, but otherwise good. "I thought it would've been a mess of streets and people, all foggy and stuff from the snow... but it's so clear."

"I've never seen something so clearly before," I said, still awestruck. It was true, though. Far from obstructing our views, it was the cold sharpened everything, the clouds framing the view.

"It's beautiful," Fang breathed. When I glanced up to smile at him, I was surprised to find him looking directly at me.

"Truth," I whispered. "What do you think?"

He didn't take his eyes off of me. "I really like the view from here."

I don't know who moved first. I don't know why, or what, or how.

I just know that we were still kissing by the time we reached the bottom.

And he was right.

It was a long way down. 

But it'd taken a while to get to the top, too.

**A/N:** Inspiration for the end comes from 'The View From Here' by We The Kings, from their new album Sunshine State Of Mind. It's lovely.

All my thanks and love to Cari, aka Nightrose131, who this chapter would not exist without. She's wonderful and fabulous and I love her, so go give her your love too. Seriously.

**Question:** what would you do in a day out in London? Or, really, any city you'd like to visit?

I'd probably do an Iggy/Ella and go to the theatre. To see Matilda, for Tim Minchin, naturally.

**Review?**


	32. Chapter 32

**A/N: **I love you all, 'kay? Thank you so much, over 800 reviews, insanity. If you're looking for a reply to your review/unconditional love/a conversation/to become best friends, tumblr's the place to go.

Tayjardineappreciationlife dot tumblr dot com

Otherwise...  
**here you go~**

Iggy and Ella hurried down the cold, snowy street. You see, at this moment, you'd expect a description of the way their cheeks were flushed, and how they were laughing as they ran.

They weren't. Both were swearing vigorously.

"For _fuck's _sake," Ella yelled, whipping her long dark hair from her face as she sidestepped various people. "You twat!"

"It's not my fault!" Iggy returned, apologising to an old woman he'd accidentally brushed.

Ella laughed almost hysterically, putting on a high-pitched voice: "Just let me answer one more comment! Let me save one more picture of Edward Cullen for later! We won't have to run!"

"So maybe it was a tiny bit my fault," Iggy replied, pulling a face, before pointing manically. "IT'S THERE! RUN!"

Ella shook her head – like she wasn't already – but picked up her pace nonetheless. God knew what she looked like, and she'd spent so long choosing the perfect outfit, doing her make-up, and she'd even gotten Nudge and Sara to do her hair up in an elaborate up-do, studded with little clips that looked like stars, and covered with a net, before they went out shopping.

Reaching the bus they'd been running to catch, Iggy jumped on, extending a hand to Ella. She took it gratefully – she could just about run in heels, but jumping onto a bus was a whole different idea. He pulled her up with a grin, before paying for both of them.

She quirked an eyebrow as he led them to two neighbouring empty seats. "Since when did you have money?"

He shrugged. "Since I started putting my igiocy online. Oh, hey." He leant closer to her, and Ella had the sudden urge to move away. _What was he doing? _"You have snow all in your hair. You want me to brush it out before it melts?" _Of course. What had she been thinking? It was _Iggy. Surprised, she nodded quickly, and he gently pulled out the pieces of ice.

"I'm surprised," she admitted, not looking at him, instead watching the dreary streets fly by.

Iggy stirred beside her, and she knew he was looking at her. "Elaborate."

She flicked him a smile. "You haven't mentioned Twilight or Rob Pattinson once."

Instead of laughing, Iggy sighed, grimacing slightly. "El, can I ask you something?"

Nodding, she met his eyes and saw a sadness she didn't expect. "Go ahead."

"Can I, for just one night, stop trying to make everyone else smile, and just be me?" She opened her mouth to reply, but he held up a hand. "No, wait. I don't mean that like, I'm so selfless, I just care about everyone so much, wah wah wah etcetera. Just... can I stop trying? Please?"

His eyes were filled with such honesty, such earnestness, that Ella could only nod.

In his head, Iggy imagined what he wished she'd said: _You can be whoever the hell you want with me. You're still Iggy._

**[ x x x ]**

**Max Martinez:** Hey, El, remember that time you fancied Ig?

**You: **No. I'm trying to enjoy a peaceful bus journey to see my favourite ever musical. Leave me alone.

**Max: **You do. I know you do. Remember it Ella. Embrace your love for the weird kid.

**You: **Shut up!

**Max: **You can be the Edward to his Bella.

**You: **Max, I'll snap your Paramore CD.

**Max: **Like Ig snapped your heart when he took that blue crayon?

**You: **I'm turning my phone off now. Tell Nudge/Sara to wait up for me. Fall in a ditch. Love you.

**[ x x x ]**

_Hair like dark chocolate_

_star-studded_

_Eyes like whirlpools_

_deeper than the ocean_

_eyes with a spark_

_Eyes with a story_

_bright and shining_

_Silky green clinging to curves_

_soft as sunsets_

_Hard as rain_

_smile like summer sailing_

_breathe iggy breathe_

**[ x x x ]**

When the bus rolled to a stop, Ella was buzzing with excitement, almost _skipping _off the bus, and partway down the road until she realised that Iggy was a way behind her. Not that he minded – now he'd let his guard down, at least partly, he was just allowing himself to enjoy himself: Not too much, though. If he drank too much of Ella in, he'd forget to breathe.

"Hurry up," she called impatiently, "don't make us miss the start of the musical too. Then I really will cry."

Iggy laughed, running the distance, saying, "Can we do something really stupid and insane?"

Ella rolled her eyes. "What?"

Iggy was taken aback for a moment, before remembering that Ella wasn't her sister. She wasn't going to automatically turn down everything he said. He considered how mad how she'd get, decided she'd be ballistic, and remembered this made her eyes lit up. Reaching down, he scooped up a handful of snow, and hurled it at her.

She looked at him, dressed up in her favourite dress, hair made up, reached down, and threw a snowball right back at him. "I kind of hate you right now."

Flicking another at her, he stuck his tongue out. "Hate me on the way to the theatre." With that, he took off. Ella, giggling, ran after him, throwing snowballs at his back.

**[ x x x ]**

Fang: Ig. I've been told. Is it a date?

**Fang: Is it?**

**Fang: Are you deliberately not texting me back, or are you busy?**

**Fang: I think it is.**

**Fang: Don't kill her.**

**Fang: Or refer to her as Bella.**

**Fang: Or ask her to call you Edward.**

**Fang: Definitely don't ask her to call you Bella and refer to her as Edward. That's weird.**

**Fang: Don't try to adopt any small children.**

**Fang: Or attempt to any ginger person's hair.**

**Fang: Act relatively normal.**

**Fang: Good luck.**

**Fang: You always have Lissa.**

**[ x x x ]**

A little girl walked hand-in-hand with her mother, kicking happily at the snow as she walked. It was cold, but she couldn't stop picking up the snow and studying it, letting it melt and trickle through her fingers.

Laughter rang through the street, and she looked up to see two teenagers running, a girl and a boy. She was breathtakingly beautiful, especially with such a big smile on her face, and a twinkle in her eye. He was running away from her, but he couldn't stop looking over his shoulder, just to check she was there.

"Mummy?" She tugged on her mother's hand, who looked down with a smile.

"What's up, sweetie?"

She pointed to the figures, now almost in the distance. "What's wrong with them?"

The woman laughed, reaching down to hoist her daughter into her arms. "They're in love, darling."

"They looked happy," the girl snuggled down into her mum's arms, nuzzling her face into her neck. "I want to be in love, too, if it makes me happy."

Her mother laughed again, running a hand through the little girl's hair, deciding not to dispel her innocent ideas, but silently hoping that she'd stay this way forever.

**[ x x x ] **

"Hey," Sam walked into the hospital room, holding two Starbucks cups.

Amber looked up from her book, smiling automatically when she saw it was him. "Oh, hey!"

He sat on the edge of her bed, handing her a coffee. "Your favourite."

She took it gratefully, taking an appreciative sip. "Mmm. How did you know?"

Sam looked up from his own coffee, and almost regretted it because her eyes were_ shining like that _and he wanted to kiss her so much and he could but he couldn't and _it hurt so freaking much. _

"We were best friends, rememeber?" They both decided to ignore the way his voice cracked on 'remember'. _Please remember, Amber. Please._

"I'll take your word for it," she rolled her eyes. "So we spent a lot of time together?"

Sam nodded, sipping at his coffee to help him regain himself before answering: "As much as we could, yeah. It sucked that we went to different schools. But we'd always go for coffees on a Tuesday, and have a movie night on Friday. We spent most weekends together, too."

"Really?" Amber's eyes were wide, and Sam just nodded, looking away quickly. "Hey." She reached out, touching him on the shoulder, evidently haven taken him looking away in the wrong way. "Thank you for being here for me. I really hope I remember you, out of everyone. I know we're going to be best friends again, you know. Just as close as before!"

_Just as close as before. _Sam felt his insides contract, and had to excuse himself just to get some air. Just to breathe for a few moments.

_It hurts it hurts it hurts it hurts it hurts it hurts it hurts it hurts it hurts it hurts it hurts so much._

He was only fifteen. He knew it was probably ridiculous to be acting as if Amber was his whole world. But he just couldn't imagine a life without her smile, the feel of her hand resting in his, the way she leant back against his chest as they watched a movie, the way she seemed to know exactly what he was thinking, the way her eyes lit up when she caught sight of him.

He couldn't imagine a life without Amber.

"Hey." Sam glanced up to find Amber's dad walking up to him, and nodded in greeting. "They say she's

gonna be out this afternoon." He studied Sam, who fought to fight his expression clear. "You want to, uh, be here?"

Sam nodded again. "Of course. If it's okay, I'll come back with you, then get a ride back?"

"Fine with me," the older man shrugged. "Mind telling me what this best friends business is about?" Sam exhaled heavily. "If you gonna hurt my daughter-"

"Sir," Sam held up a hand quickly. "Believe me, if I hurt Amber I'd just be hurting myself." The other man nodded, his eyes softening from the glare they'd settled into, but his gaze was still hard on Sam, and he sighed. "I was just thinking about something she said to me once. She was saying she'd always wanted a Nicholas Sparks romance. You know, the guy who wrote The Notebook?" Sam blinked away the memories of them watching it together multiple times, and focused on her father nodding. "See, she was saying all this stuff about their love being so pure and real, and how they'd just clicked-" he snapped his fingers "-like that."

"I don't see how-"

Sam shook his head. "No, wait. So I was thinking. I don't want her to love me again, just because I said we were in a relationship before. I love her, Sir, more than anything, and I want to fight for this. I know it'll go wrong if I just butt in like 'We were going out, love me'." He paused, then met the man's eyes with the first genuine smile since Amber had fallen. "I'm going to fight for her, fight to make our love all pure and real. I'm going to fight to have a Nicholas Sparks romance." 

Amber's father looked Sam up and down slowly, taking his time before smiling. "You're a good kid, Sam Owen. One of the best." He took a deep breath as Sam exhaled, clapping the teenager on the shoulder with a real smile. "And if it means anything to you, there's no one else I'd rather try to win my daughter over with an insane idea like that."

Sam laughed, nodding resolutely. "I'll do it, Sir. I know I can."

The man narrowed his eyes slightly, scrutinising the boy's face. "You know what? I know you can too."

**[ x x x ]**

My hand was entwined with Fang's as we walked back to the hotel. It was a really weird feeling. Like we were doing something forbidden, when I knew it was only me that'd kept us from doing it (mind out of the gutter, thank you). Still, I was fighting the feeling of wanting to wrench my hand away and take off.

"You're shivering," Fang said, frowning. "You're cold."

Incredulously, I looked up at him. "No shit? Snow tends to be relatively _freaking freezing._"

He rolled his eyes, before disentangling our hands – I had a moment of _I'm sorry, what did you just do and how dare you do it? _- and pulling his Kids in Glass Houses hoodie off. Studying me for a moment, he seemed to realise I wasn't going to just take it, and so grabbed me around the waist and pulled it on over my head, all in one smooth motion. I lashed out, but _ow. _Iron Man, right.

"Shut up," he quipped, before I'd even opened my mouth to yell at him. "You'll freeze otherwise."

"What about you?" It came out before I could stop it, okay? Apparently Hawaii just gets more attractive by the day. I can't help it.

For a moment, he just stopped. Then he flashed that heart-killing half-smile, and wrapped an arm around my waist, pulling me close as we walked. "You can keep me warm."

I laughed, jokingly pushing him away. "If that's your condition, you can have your damn hoodie back."

He just chuckled, wrapping his hand around mine.

God knows what we were. More-than-friends-but-not-quite-going-out-or-maybe-he-thought-we-were-but-he-hadn't-clarified-it-so-what-was-I-meant-to-think?

I don't know. I just knew I was pretty damn freaking happy, walking hand-in-hand, wearing Fang's hoodie. I was happy to be with him.

**[ x x x ]**

The attendant took the couple's tickets, checking them briefly, before directing them to a seat near the back. It was a long and boring job, but someone had to do it.

Needless to say, he was most definitely _not _prepared for the two soaking wet teenagers that walked in, still laughing quietly about something. They were, quite literally, dripping water, and leaving a damp trail behind them.

He looked at them distastefully when they stopped before him, taking the proffered tickets with a snap. To his surprise, they had the best seats in the house: centre front row. Almost unwillingly, he muttered this, and the girl smiled. As they passed, she turned to look at him.

"Oh, lighten up."

**[ x x x ]**

"Should I text her? Or is that desperate?"

Internally, Aiden screamed. Externally, he sighed. "Do you want to play or not?" He threw the xBox controller at his twin brother, who caught it easily and threw himself on the beanbag at the foot of the sofa.

"No, but really, I do need to know, right? It's normal that I should know? Right? Aid?"

Exasperatedly, Aiden ran a hand through his hair. "Normally, girls are throwing themselves at my feet. I wouldn't know."

Instead of just kicking him, Matt instead threw his on-screen character off a cliff. At Aiden's raised eyebrows, he grinned. "Suicide is the only option when it comes to you."

"Says you? Hi, I'm Matt, all I ever talk or think about is Eleni fucking James."

"Oh, shut up," Matt replied, rolling his eyes. There were a few minutes of silence as they both focused on the game, until... "Maybe I should call her. Or is that worse than texting? Aid? Why are you leaving? We're only halfway through the game!" 

**[ x x x ]**

Iggy felt a hand clench his arm. "I always cry at this part." It was barely a whisper, but he understood, and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. There was drama and gunshots and suddenly she was burying her head into his shoulder and all he could think was _Damn, she smells really good. _Then they were standing and she was clapping so fast her hands might fall off and they were bowing and she was smiling up at him and thanking him and he couldn't believe he was there.

He remembered who he was, and snapped out of it, winking and pretending to tip a hat at a female lead, who laughed and blew him a kiss. Ella elbowed him, rolling her eyes, telling him something exasperatedly about theatre etiquette but she was smiling amusedly and her eyes were alive so he ignored her.

When they had left the theatre, he noticed she was shivering, and so offered her his coat. She accepted gratefully, pulling it around her shoulders.

"Thanks," she said, as they strolled slowly to the nearest bus station. Their breaths came out in white puffs. "For everything tonight."

Iggy grinned at her. "No worries. It was fun, huh?"

"Yeah. It really was."

They both laughed a little, before Iggy started running, yelling over his shoulder, "Race you!"

"No fair, you little cheating-"

**[ x x x ]**

**Question: **What would you do in Iggy's position? 

**A/N: **Yep, hope you like it. Yep, it's shit scary to be British with the riots going on right now. Yep, it'd be fabulous if you revealed yourself on Tumblr. Nope, I'm not going to reply to reviews here any more.

Love you all!:)


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